Birds chirped as the sun began to rise, they had drank the night away and everyone was slowly making there way towards their beds. The grass was wet with the early morning dew and it dampened the bottom of her dress and soaked into her shoes making her shiver. Julia looked around the field for anyone familiar but they had all gone, they had left her here alone. Where they not going to say goodbye before she left? She heard the gravel crunch under the horses hooves behind her. Sighing she takes one last look at her home, the rows of caravans bright with colour, the fields around her and the fresh air. She wouldn't be back her for a while, she would need to time to adjust and coming home would not help that.
Tommy hopped down from the horse and held out his hand for Julia, she ignored it and lifted herself onto the horse without his help. She had been riding her whole life and had never needed the help from a man in order to mount. Tommy shakes his head but does not smile, she was going to be hard work. Too stubborn for her own good. He climbs up and lifts Julia's hand and places it on her waist, she may be stubborn but even she had to know that not holding on would be a bad idea.
They made there way out of the farm land and down the beaten dirt road, Julia wants to rest her head on Tommy's back and cry but she doesn't, instead she keeps her head held high and does not look backwards, if she does the tears would surly come. They ride in silence as they make there way towards the city, the houses started out being separated with a small patch of land between them but slowly they made there way deeper into the city. Julia had been here once before, when she was a small child and the smell of the smoke and dirt made her feel sick, she much preferred the open air of the country. Suddenly they were surrounded by miles of back to back houses. "We walk from here." Tommy turned his head towards Julia. She slowly spun her body and slid down the side of the horse, her pretty white shoes instantly covered in black grime.
Tommy hands the reigns of the horse to a small man in a flat cap. "Who's this Tommy?" The man nods behind Tommy at Julia who is silent and looking anywhere but the man.
"My wife." Tommy says dismissively at the Man he begins to walk away from him, Julia scurries behind him quickly following in his footsteps. He takes a quick turn down another street, Julia cant tell where they are, it all looks the same to her and she's unsure of how Tommy can tell where he is going. Tommy comes to an abrupt holt in front of a deep green door. Julia nearly knocks into the back of him but steps out of the way so that she doesn't touch him. The earlier light hearted smile that he wore has gone and he is now frowning, he looks exhausted and he seemed to have age years since they left the farm. How old was he anyway? Julia thought, she had forgotten to ask. This man could easily be ten years her senior.
Pushing the door open he walks in first, the door nearly springing back at hitting Julia. Another piece of her heart crumbles and falls to her stomach, there would be no welcoming her over the doorstep in her husbands arms like she had always dreamt of. "Living room." Tommy motions to a small room with two arm chairs and a fire place, the fire looks as though it has never been used and it is deadly cold. "Kitchen." He points over towards a door at the far end of the room. He then turns and marches up the stairs in front of him. "My room." He opens the door at the top of the stairs.
Julia is surprised at home homely it feels, there is a small single bed in the corner and a bed side cabinet next to it, on the floor in front of the first is a tin bath. Julia scans her eyes across the room, where would she sleep? The bed would not be big enough for both of them. Suddenly Tommy marches across the room and picks something up from the bed and shoves it into the drawer of his bed side cabinet. "We will get a new bed." He nods at her as he takes of his peaked cap, placing it on top of his chest of drawers. "I wasn't expecting.." To get married. Julia finishes off the sentence in her head, so this hadn't been his plan? "We should.." Tommy fumbles, as he looks at the small bed.
"Right." Julia nods back at him, they would need to consummate the marriage within 24 hours. It was the gipsy way, if they didn't their marriage would be cursed. "Can you?" Julia forces a smile at Tommy as she points to her back, she wouldn't be able to undo the buttons without his help. Slowly Tommy walks towards her and she spins around, lifting up her strawberry blonde hair so that he can start from the top. Tommy slowly begins to undo the buttons, one by one. Julia couldn't help but wonder how he could be so calm and was undoing her dress so smoothly, she could hardly keep her fingers from shaking whilst holding her hair never mind undoing buttons.
Tommy releases the last button and slowly slides the dress down her right shoulder, her skin is soft and clear apart from a few freckles upon her back. With a shaky breath Tommy leans into Julia, wrapping his arms around her waist. Words are at the tip of his tong, he wants to tell her that he is sorry for the situation that she is in and that he thinks she could be happy with him one day but the woman doesn't deserve to be lied to, not when she is in such a vulnerable position. Instead of words coming from his mouth Tommy begins to kiss down her neck and onto her shoulder. Slowly he pushes the rest of the dress from her shoulder and is falls gently to the floor. Spinning her around his breath catches in his throat, she really is a beautiful woman.
Julia tries to hold back the tears as Tommy takes in her body, he is looking at her like every other man had looked at her. She would be used by this man just like all the others but for the first time, she didn't want to be used, she wanted to be loved. Tommy does not seem to notice or if he does he does not seem to care as he leads Julia to the bed, laying her down gently he climbs on top of her.
They lay in each other's arms afterwards, both out of breath and panting. Julia rests her head on Tommy's chest, her fingers tracing up and down his stomach. The sex had been good, she was grateful that at least he knew what he was going with a woman but there was nothing there between them, no spark on any level. "Who was I supposed to marry?" Julia whispers, looking up at Tommy.
"My brother, John." Tommy sighs, trying to not look her in the eye, if he looked at her he couldn't pretend she was somebody else. "I wasn't supposed to.." Julia doesn't need him to finish the sentence. "But I had to." He does it anyway, he had to. All a part of the family's bid to end a century long war. That's all she was, a pawn in a game of tug and war. Tommy see's the tears forming in the young woman's green eyes, sighing he shifts onto his side, cupping her face in his hand he wipes the tears away with his thumb. Julia pulls away from him then and sits up on the bed, swinging her legs around so they dangle of the edge of the bed.
"This wont happen again." Julia hisses back at Tommy as she stands she looks around the room for a shirt, she pulls it over her body and stands at the edge of the bed. "Until you get another bed, you are on the floor." She points to the rug at the foot of the bed. Tommy raises her eye brows, was she serious? Why should he sleep on the floor? "Floor." Julia demands, folding her arms across her body. Tommy shakes his head a she climbs out of the bed and lies on the floor, pulling one of the blankets with him. Julia throws a pillow at him and it lands on his face. "Good night Thomas." Julia murmur's as she climbs back into the bed, turning her body to the wall she shuts her eyes, but sleep does not come easily. Julia spends hours counting the amount of flowers in the wall paper, by the time she eventually drifts off she has counted over 200.
Tommy hears her breathing change to shallow slow breaths, knowing she is finally asleep he slowly creeps across the room to his night stand, he pulls the drawer open and takes out his pipe and makes his way out of the room and down the stairs. Siting down in the arm chair he lights a match and places it to the end of the pipe, watching it beginning to build up smoke he takes a slow deep drag from the end and places it onto the table next to him. Leaning his head back on the chair he welcomes the low hum that rings in his ears and the darkness that surrounds him.
When Julia awakes she forgets where she is, the strange room is cold and smells of damp. Was it damp? She wasn't sure. "Tommy what's that smell?" Julia stretches her arms above her head and lets out a loud yawn. "Tommy?" Julia says a bit louder before leaning over the bed. The pillow and blanket still on the floor but Tommy was no longer there. Julia slowly makes her away out of the room, had he left her here alone? Julia makes her way down the stairs, his coat and hat still on the rack by the door. Julia pushes open the living room door to see Tommy fast asleep on the sofa. Julia goes back up stairs to fetch the blanket, maybe she had been harsh on him, making him sleep on the floor like that.
Julia throws the blanket over her husbands body, making sure his shoulders are covered so that it won't fall down. That's when she sees it, the source of the strange smell; an opium pipe. "Oh Tommy." Julia sighs as she picks up the pipe, it's still warm and there is a small bit of the drug still rolled into melted ball at the end. "You poor man." Julia whisper's as he places the pipe back on to the table. Many of the men that came back from France used the drug to help them sleep, to stop the nightmares from happening.
As Julia is about to leave the room she hears Tommy stir, she watches him for a moment, beads of sweat begin to form on his brow and his murmurs become more angry shouts. "No! Let go!" Tommy begins to shout and thrash in his chair. Julia runs to him then, placing her hands on his shoulders.
"Tommy! Tommy it's okay!" Julia shouts, shaking his shoulders. "Tommy it's okay, your home!" Julia hushes him as she strokes his cheek. Tommy's eyelids fly open, his ice blue eyes full of confusion. "You're ok." Julia soothes him, Tommy nods in response, not wanting to fight her. She had seen him in his most vulnerable state and she had managed to pull him back from one of his never ending nightmares, something that only his brothers could normally do. "Would you like a cup of tea?" Julia smiles at him, he nods in response and she releases him. Julia makes her way to the kitchen, thankfully a kettle already sits upon the stove top and all she has to do is light it.
Tommy watches her from his seat as she makes her way around the kitchen looking for something to put the tea in, he wasn't even sure he had anything suitable. After-all, he wasn't the type of man to drink tea.