My apologies for the delay, but here we go at last. Hey guess what I did for my birthday? I had my friends come to my house and we watched the Dr. Horrible DVD and all the special features. My "cake" was frozen yogurt. Yeah, I really am that cool.

"Ouch!" Penny stifled a laugh as she reached across the table and took Billy's strong but delicate hand in hers. She pulled the already red-spotted napkin from her pocket and dabbed at his skinned knuckle.

"You don't peel potatoes very often, do you, Billy Buddy?" Billy shook his head. "Here, you cut them after I peel, okay?"

Billy nodded. "I try to cook, but it never really works out."

"I'm more of a takeout and peanut butter and jelly person myself," agreed Penny. "But I can cook a little. Let me know if you ever want some tips."

"Thanks." Billy smiled, but the expression faltered. He blinked that over exaggerated, nervous blink that Billy found so sweet. "So… what happened with Hammer last night?"

Penny's hand jerked violently, driving the peeler into the flesh of the potato. "He tried to drive me to his house. I told him I was sick, asked him to just let me go home." She sighed and began hacking at the next potato. "He dropped me off, carried my laundry up to my apartment, and tried to smooth-talk his way inside. I tried to look as sick as possible and shut the door in his face."

"Well that's a start," mumbled Billy; he blushed as Penny looked away, disappointed by Billy's less than enthusiastic words. He didn't know what to say to bring back that smile he loved so dearly, didn't know what to do except hold her, which he was too cowardly to attempt.

The pile of sliced potatoes grew with the awkward silence. Penny wasn't sure how to explain to Billy how she felt about this uncomfortable relationship. She wasn't even sure how to explain to herself how she felt about her growing friendship with Billy. But she was quite sure she trusted her Billy Buddy and wanted to be completely honest with him. She steeled herself to tell him what had been preying on her mind since yesterday. "Billy, I-"

But at that moment, Billy made his own attempt to conquer the silence between them. "So-" He stopped when he heard Penny's voice. "Sorry." He blinked nervously. "What were you saying?"

"Oh, I…" She took a deep breath and spoke, looking away from the emotional eyes she knew would soon show great pain. "I overheard what Hammer said to you yesterday. At the laundromat."

Billy's heart froze. Penny had heard what that disgusting creep had said about her! And that meant she'd heard how Hammer spoke to him. Even if she didn't understand the meaning behind comments like, "What's up, Doc?" she would surely have gathered that Hammer and Billy were no strangers.

"Well… he's a jerk, Penny. Just trying to embarrass both of us at the same time."

Penny nodded, but Billy could tell she was still thinking about the incident. "He seemed to really dislike you, Billy Buddy. Did you do something to make him angry?"

"I, uh, I guess he just doesn't like me talking to you. Not surprising that he would be possessive."

Shrugging, Penny lifted the pot containing the finished potatoes and began carrying it toward the kitchen. Billy leapt from his flimsy folding chair, knocking it to the floor in his haste to reach Penny. "Here, I'll carry that," he said as he lifted the heavy pot from her arms.

She blushed gratefully, flattered by Billy's thoughtfulness. "Oh. Thanks, Billy."

When he returned, Billy helped clean the potato peels from the table. He then turned to the girl of his dreams and asked her what else he could do.

"We did a lot today, Billy. I could actually use a break." She smiled brightly. "Want to go get some frozen yogurt?"

They sat at a small rickety table in the back of the local ice cream shop, eating vanilla frozen yogurt that Billy had bought. Penny had protested, but Billy insisted that she deserved to be treated to anything she wanted.

Why was Billy so good to her, she wondered. She thought again of what she had heard Hammer say to her friend at the Coin Wash and decided to take a chance on asking him something that could cause Billy's shyness to return in full force, making him retreat from her. But everything happens, so Penny thought it only made sense to take chances. "Hammer mentioned that you would be hurt by my being with him. He said you have a crush on me?" She ended it as a question, though she didn't know what sort of an answer she wanted.

"Well, Hammer said that you wanted to sleep with him too," Billy snapped. "He's an idiot, Penny. Don't listen to him." His eyes glinted with anger and his face flushed with… something else. Humiliation?

Penny wondered at the sudden painful tightness around her heart. Billy hadn't said anything that should hurt her. So why did she suddenly feel like crying?"

Billy's heart pounded in his ears as he tried desperately to appear casually offended by Hammer's words. What would Penny think of him if she knew how hopelessly in love he was? She'd almost certainly stop speaking to him. But when he looked at her over his slowly melting yogurt, he thought she looked sad. Those couldn't be tears in her eyes, could they? What if Penny saw him as more than her dorky laundry buddy? What if she loved him?

Billy dismissed the thought as soon as it entered his usually perceptive mind. Penny was perfect, the sort of girl meant to date a hero. A real hero, of course, not Captain Pretty-boy. But she certainly wasn't the Girl Friday of any villain, even one who hated violence.

Whatever her feelings for him, he had snapped at her and obviously offended her, the last thing he ever wanted to do. "I'm sorry, Penny. I didn't mean it like that. He just doesn't have the right to say anything about either of us. But you know I like you a lot, right?"

Penny smiled sadly. "Sure, Billy Buddy, I know."

After several days of avoiding Captain Hammer, Penny found herself once again sharing a meal with her boyfriend at Caring Hands. It was strange to be in this place which she had grown accustomed to sharing with Billy, for though her laundry buddy had made it clear that he was interested in no more than friendship, they were very close friends.

Thinking of Billy while sitting across from Captain Hammer, Penny was struck by a sudden idea. Although she and Billy had spent time together since the incident at the Laundromat, she still wondered what sort of conflict had occurred between him and Hammer. The conceited hero would surely tell Penny if he had once caught Billy doing something wrong.

"When you met Billy at the Laundromat," she began nervously, afraid of what she was about to hear, "You seemed to recognize him. Have you met before?"

Hammer smirked, remembering the car he had thrown at Dr. Horrible's head the last time they met. "he hasn't told you much about himself, has he?"

Penny thought about her numerous conversations with Billy. She knew everything about him that mattered; his beliefs, his dreams, his withdrawn personality borne of anxiety. But she actually knew very little about him; his job, his past, and his personal life were never discussed. It was unfair to blame him for this, thought Penny, for she herself was reluctant to share her past with people.

"Have you ever heard of a villain called Dr. Horrible?" Hammer asked, pleased at the little shudder that ran through his latest conquest at his words.

Yes, of course Penny had heard of Dr. Horrible. He was an up-and-coming villain who had not met with much success but still managed to cause a lot of damage. Though there were no deaths or injuries attributed to his crimes, Penny still thought of him as absolutely…well, horrible.

"Your little laundry buddy is his disguise. I hate to tell you this, Penny baby, but you're dating a superhero and doing laundry with his nemesis."

Penny's heart froze. As much as she disliked Captain Hammer, she knew that he wasn't lying. Though she had tuned out his voice, she was vaguely aware that he was taking the opportunity to boast about his many heroic defeats of her best friend.

Billy! Memories of her quiet friend flashed through her mind. The first day he spoke to her, mumbling something stupid about the air. The day he surprised her with a cup of frozen yogurt, passing the incident off as a "crazy random happenstance". The sorrow and humiliation that had marred his face the day he came to the laundromat covered in bruises. Now she knew where those came from, at least. She had even watched him receive them. She remembered how eagerly he had come to Caring Hands, looking for a way to help people. The gentleness he had shown when speaking to Mrs. Reynolds. How could this wonderful person be a villain?

"…threw him into the wall, where he sat like a scared puppy. But an evil, dangerous puppy. And that's how I stopped his bank robbery attempt." Hammer looked at his girlfriend expectantly, waiting for her to shower him with praise. Instead, Penny smiled weakly and stood up.

"Um… listen," she cleared her throat of the hard lump that had settled there and brushed away the burning in her eyes. "I have to go. I'm sorry. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" She left before Hammer could protest.

Yes, she would see Captain Hammer the next day, and any other day he liked. Thank goodness she hadn't let that villainous phony destroy the best thing in her life. True, Hammer might be a little cheesy and self-centered, but he was essentially a good person. Billy was… Billy was perfect. But he was a villain, and for that she had no choice but to hate him. Penny collapsed onto her bed, knocking several stuffed animals of endangered species to the cold floor. She cried until exhaustion outweighed sorrow and she fell asleep.

Please review? Pretty please?

PS. I think there's only one chapter of this left.