Ok sorry about the very, very late update, but I thought that this chapter was already posted but apparently not. I only found out that it wasn't today when I was reading all my stories checking for spelling mistakes. Sorry once again.
This is where Arthur finally finds out. Hope you like it.
Disclaimer: Merlin does not belong to me, but the story that I wrote does.
"It's all my fault." Came a small voice in the shadows that Arthur recognized as Merlin's. He was obviously crying and didn't want anyone to notice. He was doing a very bad job of it too. All the knights stopped what they were doing and turned towards the sound. Merlin was twenty paces away, huddled against a fallen log and shivering.
"It's all my fault." He said again. Gwen wandered over to the servant, followed by the others. Merlin didn't see to notice that they were all standing around him, watching and waiting for an explanation.
"It's all my fault."
"Merlin." Arthur finally ventured to speak. The manservant said nothing. "What's your fault? Nothing that is happening was caused by you." It didn't seem to comfort him. "Morgana made her choice and she choose the side of evil. You didn't make her do that." What Merlin said next took them all by surprise.
"It is my fault Arthur. I poisoned her." He ignored the gasp of shock from Gwen and continued "It was when the castle was falling under Morgause's sleeping spell and we went to investigate reports that the Knights of Medhir had been reawakened. Morgana was the only one who was awake when we returned. I went to Gaius's chambers and discovered that Morgana was the source of the enchantment and that to stop it, I had to kill her." Here Merlin stiffled a sob.
"When we were locked in the Throne Room and you left to fight the Knights, I put hemlock in the water skin and practically begged her to drink it. She did. I hated it. I still considered her as my friend and she was dying in my arms. Morgause came into the room and realized what I had done. I traded her the name of the poison in return that she stop the knights. Then Morgause took her away and everyone thought that she had been kidnapped. When she came back she hated me and tried to kill me on several occasions. I made her turn bad. I could have helped her but I didn't. It's all my fault."
Everyone was silent before Gwaine tried to lighten the mood.
"Well now that we know that Merlin is capable of killing Morgana, I think that we should get something to drink and…"
"Shut up, Gwaine" Elyan hissed in his ear.
"Merlin, even if it is your fault, which I highly doubt, you don't have to solve it on your own. We're going to do stop her together." Arthur replied. Merlin looked up at him and gave a small smile before turning away again.
"Thanks, but it is my problem and mine alone."
"Merlin, whatever it is tell us. We can help you."
"No one can help me. No one can understand."
"Then help us to." Came the persistent reply. Merlin finally got up and walked a short distance before replying.
"You know what it feels like to have a destiny, Arthur. Destiny is a troublesome thing. You feel trapped. Like your whole life is being planned out for you and you've got no control over anything and sometimes you don't even know if a destiny decided is really the best thing at all." He quoted from what he had said to Arthur when he had been forced to marry Princess Elena.
"I know how it feels Arthur. I understand. You are the Once and Future King. Everyone knows that. But do you know who I am. Do any of you. No. Nobody does. I also have a destiny, Arthur. A destiny as great as yours, but no one knows. I have no one to confide in because they're all dead. Freya, Will, my mother, my father, Lancelot, Gaius." His voice broke slightly.
"They're all dead because of me and my destiny. Perhaps if I had told Morgana about it, it would have stopped her from being who she became." He turned to face them for the first time since he had stood up. "But I didn't, and the problems mine."
They all saw a change in the servant. Where there had once been a servant who had talked about everything and anything and always had a goofy smile to brighten the day. Now there was an older, wiser Merlin who carried a great burden on his shoulders. His eyes, once so joyful and content, seemed sadder and filled with knowledge.
"What destiny, Merlin?" Gwaine asked, suddenly serious. Immediately Merlin began to look scared and torn between telling them or not. He kept shooting terrified glances at Arthur and Sir Leon. Finally he seemed to come to a decision.
"Very well, but I ask you not to judge me too quickly. Remember what you were born as. A prince, a commoner, a noble or" He managed a weak smile in Gwaine's direction. "in your case Gwaine, a drunk."
"Hey!" There was some sniggering at Gwaine's indignant reply.
Merlin observed them from a distance. They were having fun now but would he enjoy their company after he showed them who he truly was.
"Merlin. Are you going to tell us about your destiny or what because I'd like something to drink before you start." Gwaine said. Merlin's eyes flashed gold and the jug of ale that had lain by the fire was suddenly in Gwaine's hands. The others looked from Merlin to Gwaine and back again. Arthur was already on his feet with a sword in his hands.
"You can do magic." Merlin merely nodded and seemed unfazed that Arthur could kill him at any moment. Gwaine wasn't in the least surprised, instead he raised the jug to Merlin and said. "Thanks mate." And he took a long swig. Merlin smiled at them.
"Now you know my secret. Now you will know my destiny."
Arthur felt like the world was collapsing around him, when he saw Merlin's eyes flash gold and a jug of ale coming to rest in Gwaine's hand. He pulled out his sword and finally found his voice.
"You can do magic." He said. Merlin just nodded.
"Thanks mate." Came Gwaine's voice and Merlin smiled for a fraction of a second before returning his gaze on Arthur.
"Now you know my secret. Now you will know my destiny."
Merlin is going to show them his memories next chapter. Anyway I probably won't be able to update soon because my parents are dragging me off somewhere for a couple of days. Reviews? Pleeassssse….
P.S. I have a poll up on my profile about what kind of story you want me to write next. Please vote.