I dedicate this chapter to Lady Neelahn. My twin sister and my biggest inspiration. Thank you for encouraging me and always be there for me. You were an amazing sister and I will miss you so much. I love you sis.
"Miss Junk, how are you feeling today?" my doctor asked.
"A lot better than yesterday" I answered.
"I'm so pleased to heat that" my doctor said.
She looked at me like she wanted to say something but didn't dare. Suddenly I got scared. Had it something to do with my illness?
"What's wrong doc?" I asked her softly.
"Well there are at least six concerned girls in the waiting room that want to talk to you" my doctor said.
I instantly felt a knot forming in my stomach. I knew the Bellas were concerned and wanted answers but somehow I couldn't tell them the truth. I didn't want pity. I didn't want them to worry about me. If this illness was causing my life I wanted to die in dignity. Not as some little kid that needed to be looked after.
"If you're not ready to see them I can sent them away."
My doctors voice brought me back to reality.
"No. It's just I don't want to tell them how bad it is. They're so worried and they need to concentrate on other things than me" I confessed.
"They are your friends. I've seen them when you were in surgery yesterday. And they really care about you. Don't you think they deserve the truth?" my doctor asked me.
"You're probably right. I guess I can't hide it much longer. Hoe long do you think it's going to take before I can't dance and sing anymore?" I asked although I was afraid of the answer.
"Your illness is progressing much faster than we originally thought. But it's not only that miss Junk. I hate to say it but your vision is deteriorating quickly" my doctor said.
"What do you mean by that?" I asked.
"It means that in about two months you will be completely blind. So you're really going to need the help of your friends" my doctor said.
"Okay, let them in. I guess I don't really have another choice" I sighed defeated.
Shortly after my doctor left, my room was filled with Bellas. To my surprise my aca moms and Stacie weren't here.
"Legacy, how are you?" Cynthia Rose asked me.
"I could be better but I'm glad I'm alive" I said honestly.
"Are you going to tell us what's going on Flatbutt?" Fat Amy asked me.
"Leave her alone Amy. She will tell us when she's ready" Jessica said.
"Jessica is right. I will tell you what's wrong but I really want to say it when we're all together" I said.
Secretly I was glad that they weren't all here. It gave me some extra time to accept the terrible news I just heard.
"Where are Beca, Chloe and Stacie anyway?" I asked.
Suddenly the girls avoided eye contact. I didn't like that at all.
"Guys, where are they?" I asked again.
"There on their way. They had to pick something up" Flo mumbled.
No I started to get worried. This was bad. I could feel it. The way the rest were suddenly quiet and avoiding eye contact. And not to mention the way they acted. I was sick not crazy.
I wanted to say something when the door of my room opened. There were the three missing Bellas. And my mom.
For a minute I was glad that I was already lying on a bed because the moment I saw my mom I felt I could faint.
The moment my mom saw me she rushed over to me and hugged me tight.
"Mom, I can't breathe" I said.
"Emily Junk what the fuck were you thinking? First you left out off the blue. And now I get a call that you're in the hospital. Are you crazy?" my mom yelled at me.
"I'm sorry mom. I don't want you to worry about me. And the same goes for the rest of you" I finally said.
"Getting a call you almost died didn't exactly help" my mom replied dryly.
"Why don't you start telling the truth?" Stacie encouraged me softly.
I knew she was right. It wasn't fair that she had to lie to them. She studied medicine and she probably knew how bad my condition was.
I nodded at her. Suddenly my mouth felt dry and I grabbed my glass of water. I took a big sip and took a deep breath.
"I'm sorry I left and didn't keep in touch. And I'm more sorry that I scare you" I said.
I didn't know how to continue and Stacie gave me an reassuring squeeze in my hand.
"At the beginning of this semester I didn't feel well. So I went to the doctor. He didn't trusted it and sent me to the hospital for a series of tests. A few weeks later I got the results."
I needed to take another sip of water before I could continue.
"They found out I've got an autoimmune disease. It affects my balance and and other organs. So they prescribed me medication to slow down the process. It didn't help at all. In a few weeks I can't dance or sing anymore. My doctor just told my that my vision is deteriorating quickly. In other words I'm going blind. That's why I left. I don't want pity. And I don't want to be a burden to you" I ended my story.
I felt like there was a huge weight lifted from my shoulders after finally telling the truth. But I wasn't prepared to see the devastated expression on their faces.
With a sigh I closed my eyes. Waiting until one of them gave an reaction.