Thank you for all the alerts, reviews would be nice too!
The characters in this story are from the wonderful Hunger Games Trilogy owned by the talented and extraordinary Suzanne Collins.
Enjoy!
Sleep and I haven't been friends for many years now. Ever since my father passed away, I often lay awake in bed unable to sleep. You see, when you are expected to play mother, father, daughter, hunter and friend simultaneously, it gets stressful. My mind tends to go into overdrive as soon as I place my head on the old mattress.
Tonight is no different. The more I try to fall asleep, the harder it gets. I toss and turn, count sheep, trying to think about anything and everything but Peeta. My efforts are futile as my head begins to spin and my stomach turns.
'What's wrong with me?' I think out loud in frustration.
Prim is becoming restless in her sleep and begins stirring next to me. I realize sleep was just not going to happen for me tonight; plus, with all the tossing and turning, ill wake Prim any second.
I peek out the window and notice a glint of light in the sky. I had somehow managed to stay up all night and the sun was going to rise in a few hours.
I decide to take a shot at hunting but it wasn't going to be easy. There were extra peacekeepers in town and the fence was most probably electrified. I decide to go by the fence just to test out my luck, but I don't want to show up to the bakery empty handed so I slip some of Lady's cheese in my hunting jacket to offer to Peeta's family.
My feet drag behind me, they feel heavy and the walk to the fence feels longer than usual. I feel drained and the game hasn't even begun.
It's this damn letter, I think to myself and pull it out of my pocket.
My father once told me that life is beautiful precisely because we don't know what awaits us the next day. 'That's why Katniss, you should never live with regrets' I recall him saying that day.
Is that what's bothering me, am I regretting something? I feel a wave of emotion wash over and I feel weak on my feet.
I miss my father. He would know what to do. He would tell me what to do. He would decipher my emotions and talk sense into me.
My eyes begin to water again but I refuse to cry. What use would my tears be if I return back empty handed again.
The moment I realize the fence is electrified and I instantly feel trapped. I miss the sense of freedom, of being able to venture into the woods at my pleasing. It may be artificial and temporary, but being outside the fence gives me a sense of hope. Like I am above it all, above the games, the hunger, the emptiness I feel so often.
I never ended up going to the bakery that day. Well, I did go to the bakery; I just couldn't get myself to walk inside. I had peeked through the window, and had seen a tiny candle burning on the counter. Mr. Mellark was elbow deep in flour, kneading bread. It was way too early in the morning for him to be doing any baking.
I realize I wasn't the only one with sleepless nights.
Mandatory viewing for the tribute interviews were scheduled to begin any minute now. I take my seat between Gale and Prim and can't help but fidget feeling anxious and restless. The anticipation was killing me.
"Catnip," Gale says in a hushed voice and places his hand on mine "Is everything alright?"
"Why wouldn't everything be alright," Gale's eyes widen and I realize from the odd stares I'm getting that I had raised my voice way louder than it needed to be. Exhaling deeply I drop my gaze and give Gale's hand a squeeze before releasing it.
The Mellark's have taken their seat in the front row and Avalyn's side remains empty. The rustling and conversations amongst the crowd begins to dwindle as the screen lights up with the Capitol seal.
It displaces a close up of Caesar Flickerman's face, which makes me jump in my seat.
"Ladies and gentleman, tonight is a very special night," he says before promptly introducing the Head Gamemaker Seneca Crane, followed by the infamous Claudius Templesmith.
We are then informed that the tributes were rated based on their survival and combat skills, given a number from one to twelve, giving the Capitol citizen's yet another piece to ponder over before placing their final bets on the tributes.
The careers all received tens across the board, as did Thresh. Rue scored a seven which surprised me. Avalyn was next and she scored a five to which Crane feels the need to comment. "Despite the score, with such elegance and beauty, you can't help but want to root for her," he says and Claudius Templesmith seconds this view.
Peeta was next and I was surprised to see him get an eight as well. "Who knew being a baker's son made you extremely strong," says Crane.
Being from District 12 our tributes are always interviewed last. Yes, I was definitely going to die of anticipation. I just want to see Peeta again, make sure he's doing okay. When it is finally Avalyn's turn I hear shushing around the viewing; good, I wasn't the only one bored of getting to know all the other twenty two tributes. I straighten in my seat and devote all my attention to the screen.
She enters the stage waving to the crowd and I instantly feel relief. She looks like herself and that puts a smile on my face. She makes her way to the empty chair next to Caesar as he reaches for her hand and brings it to his lips, placing a soft kiss on her knuckles.
"Avalyn Sky, ladies and gentleman" he spins her as the crowd break into an applause.
Avalyn is wearing a simple emerald green dress that is at first glance quite modest. In reality, the dress is far from it. Two delicate straps on her shoulders hold the silky dress over her breasts and attach to the back of her dress which cuts in a deep plunge. Her entire back is bare and the slit on the right side of her legs extends dangerously close to her hips. Despite her provocative dress, her make-up is demure and her hair is tossed over her right shoulder in soft waves.
"Avalyn," Caesar begins, "how are you enjoying the Capitol?" It was the standard opening line of every interview.
"It extends above and beyond my expectations Caesar," she says with a smile.
"Avalyn, we were all surprised when you volunteered," Caesar adjusts himself, crossing his legs "the little girl, what was her name?"
"Prim," she says with a small smile.
"Yes, Primrose," he gives her a reassuring nod "why did you volunteer for her?" I glance over at my little sister who meets my gaze; reaching over I give her hand a gentle squeeze.
"Well Caesar, I was going to volunteer regardless of who was chosen in the reaping this year," Caesar raises his eyebrows slightly "Why is that?" he wants her to elaborate.
"I was ready, I... felt ready" she takes a moment to inhale deeply, "as you know my brother was in the 73rd Hunger Games" Caesar nods placing a hand on hers "and I don't have anyone else left, my parents died when I was young and…" she hesitates.
"…and" Caesar questions.
A sad smile covers her face and her eyes begin to water ever so slightly "…and… I lost my love to someone else."
Sometimes I wonder if the Capitol citizens practice uniformed responses. A collective 'aww' fills the massive area designed specifically for this interview.
Caesar shakes his head "Avalyn, look at you, you are so beautiful, the man must be an idiot!" Capitol citizens laugh in unison. Yes, they definitely practiced this.
"But he's not Caesar, I'm the stupid one for thinking it was ever going to work," she notices Caesar leaning forward to object to her claim. She stops him by adding "If I can't be with him, I'd rather be dead."
"You thought volunteering would prove something to him?" Caesar is unable to decipher her coded language.
"I know it sounds irrational, but when you're in love, you do stupid things and if I can't be with him... then there's no point in living."
"Oh Avalyn, you sound defeated already, you could win, and demand his love when you go back home!" This statement is met with an uproar of the crowd, "Or, you can find yourself a new lover," he winks, as men and women begin to throw flowers of various colors on stage, a gesture to symbolize their desire for her love I'm guessing.
Even if she wanted to, Avalyn was not going to come home. I knew of her best kept secret, what solidified her tragic existence.
"For me Caesar, there will never be anyone else, my heart will always belong to him."
Avalyn was a prime example of why Seam girls stayed away from merchant boys. I often heard her story used as a warning. 'See what happened to her? Do you want to end up like her?' parents would say to their daughters. Every generation had a failed and tragic love between a merchant boy and a Seam girl, the names of the boy and girl would change but the stories always had the same ending.
For as long as I remember Avalyn was in love with the son of the local butcher. They were inseparable. He would meet her halfway to school and they would walk hand in hand paying no attention to the judgmental stares they were receiving.
It was evident to everyone, that the love was mutual and that they were meant for one another. When they stood side by side they personified perfection. His golden blond hair contrasting her black hair perfectly, and the way she looked at him full of passion and love was a source of envy for many. He loved her back too, it was obvious in the way he looked at her, smiled and wrapped her in his strong arms.
Love, however, was not enough to keep the two together. Greed, gossip, and imaginary boundaries eventually broke the two.
When he had turned eighteen, he had broken the news to her on a cold rainy day. He was engaged to be married to a merchant girl. If neither were reaped, he was to marry her immediately after the games.
"Just like that," Avalyn said with a defeated tone. "Used me for all these year and throw me away like trash right?"
"It's not like that Ava," I felt guilty eavesdropping but it technically didn't constitute as eavesdropping when she was yelling at him only a few houses from mine.
"Then what is it like?" she asked, tears streaming down her face. "You're humiliating me."
"Ava, it never would have worked out between us, not in the long run," he rubbed the back of his neck too ashamed to meet her gaze.
"Why, because your father threatened to disown you from the business? Or did you finally get tired of your friends calling me a Seam slut?" a crowd had begun to form around them whispering as she further raised her voice.
I could see the smirk on Avalyn's face "Is it because I'm…"
"I don't love you anymore," he said staring directly into her green eyes "It's over Ava... It's over."
For the first time in my life, I watched someone's heart break. Avalyn stood there, her eyes hollow, her emotions drained of all anger and sadness. She slowly unclenched her fist and allowed blood to flow back into her now dangerously white knuckles.
He didn't linger much longer, just quietly stepped around her and headed back home. Avalyn tilted her head back, closed her eyes and stood there for what seemed like hours, letting the cold rain wash away her tears.
I had a brief writers block while writing this chapter and I have to apologize for the quality. This chapter may have been unsatisfactory for those of you that want more Peeta but trust me we will be getting a whole lot of him in the next chapter!
Also, what do you guys feel about strong language and violence moving forward? I may have to change the rating to 'M'.
Leave me a review and thank you for your encouragements so far.