Name: Yuri Cosmos

Vehicle: Galactic Scooter (The only vehicle capable of allowing mankind to reach the stars with glory and ease! Sure, it may be a Segway, but it is the mighty Segway of the noble astronaut!)

Vehicle Armor: 1/5 (The proud and mighty Galactic Scooter does not need ludicrous things such as armor slowing it down! To reach glory, one must be courageous and willing to take risks!)

Vehicle Speed: 5/5 (The great and glorious Galactic Scooter is the pinnacle of advancements in transportation, for it is capable of reaching magnificent speeds of up to Mach One. Granted, it has never went over 155 mph- but it also has a hidden cup holder! Isn't space science a truly marvelous thing?!)

Vehicle Handling: Ultra Tight (The celebrated and distinguished Galactic Scooter is a mighty vehicle, capable of both literally and figuratively driving circles around small, elderly women at an excess of 80 mph for hours on end with nary an issue!)

Special Weapon: 2/5 (Photon Torpedoes- The only weapon worthy of those brave enough to explore the dark, vast depths of outer space! Sure, they may just be regular potatoes, but when fired from a potato gun mounted on a Segway traveling at over 100 mph, they are photon torpedoes!

Bio: Greetings, comrades, my glorious name is Yuri Cosmos and I am the assistant director of the Cosmos Space Center, the "center of the cosmos"! I know that your jaw has just dropped from the sheer epicenes of my presence, so I will give you a brief moment to regain your composure… Now, you may be wondering why a great man such as myself is here given all of my glorious accomplishments, but those aren't enough! No, those who are exalted throughout the ages are those with aspirations as boundless as the depths of space itself! That is why I feel a kindred connection with space- for it and I are complex, beautiful, and have enough mysteries and depth to provide countless hours of study and investigation. Ever since I was a young lad, it has been my dream to explore every nook and cranny of the cosmos for the betterment of humanity and earn my glorious place in history! So fear not, people of Earth, for once I, Yuri Cosmos, win this competition, I shall be able to personally unlock the mysteries of the universe; singlehandedly propelling mankind into a golden age of space research that many would deem impossible! I- Wait! Where are you going!? Come back here! Don't make me chase after you with my Galactic Scooter!

Kristoph stands on the rooftop of a large skyscraper, looking down at his watch as he waits for the winner of 'Debauched Steel' to come and claim his prize.

Suddenly, Kristoph is alerted to the presence of the winner, Yuri Cosmos, who is speeding along the rooftop of the skyscraper next to the one that Kristoph is on via his Galactic Scooter, his theme song blaring loud and proud on its speakers, as he launches his scooter into the air via some slanted boards of plywood, jumps the gap between the two buildings with ease, and lands right in front of Kristoph.

Kristoph flashes Yuri a grin. "Well, you certainly know how to make an entrance."

"It is of no surprise that a glorious man such as I would make an equally stunning entrance; for a man such as myself appears but once in a century- no, a millennia!" Yuri proudly proclaims with an outstretched arm and a look of pure pride in his eye.

"Yes, well, as the winner of 'Debauched Steel'-"

"A glorious win that shall go down in the annals of history for all eternity as one of my greatest triumphs- though considering who I am, there are so many to choose from…" Yuri strokes his moustache as he becomes absorbed in his narcissistic thoughts regarding his life's accomplishments: founding the Cosmos Space Center, the overall success of the HAT-1 mission, last week when he opened up a pickle jar that he just bought at the store that day all by himself, and many more victories of varying levels of impressiveness.

Yuri is suddenly snapped out of his thoughts by Kristoph angrily clearing his throat as he impatiently taps his foot on the ground, angrily glaring at this egotistical dwarf of a man who can't put give even a second of his time to the host of 'Debauched Steel', a man who literally controls the reality of their universe.

Yuri flashes Kristoph a look of irritation as if the ex-attorney is the one bothering him. "Yes, do you want something?"

"Oh, nothing really… Just that I'm giving you a free wish." Kristoph wryly remarks.

"Ah yes, my glorious wish…! Yes, my wish shall be one that is a gift to mankind from the greatest man who has and will ever live, Yuri Cosmos! My wish shall be one so grand that bards shall sing about me for the rest of time, children everywhere, both male and female, will be named after me in the hopes that they will achieve even a sliver of my greatness, and people will proclaim, 'glory be to the womb that bore Yuri Cosmos and the teat that he suckled upon!' They will build statues in my image and-"

"Will you just make your wish?! I don't have all day, you know!" Kristoph snaps.

Yuri revs the engine of his Galactic Scooter as he glares at Kristoph. "Such insolence! The world doesn't revolve around you, you know! If you wish to be as glorious as I, Yuri Cosmos, you must learn humility. As for my wish, I wish to be able to travel throughout the vastness of space with ease to discover all the mysteries in our universe!"

A sinister grin spreads across Kristoph's face. "Granted…"

Kristoph raises his arms in the air, causing bolts of electricity to stream between his hands, emitting a blinding light. When the light diminishes, Yuri sees that his Galactic Scooter is now outfitted with two large rocket engines.

Yuri looks at the changes made to his Galactic Scooter and nods in approval. "You are a man of great taste, Gavin, for you know that no vessel can do better than my noble Galactic Scooter!"

"I'm glad you like it and I wish you the best of luck on your space journey."

"Ha! Great men such as myself don't need luck! Now watch as I, Yuri Cosmos, singlehandedly pave mankind's path to galactic glory!" Yuri boldly states as he smashes the glass case between the handlebars of his Galactic Scooter and presses the red button underneath, igniting his Segway's new rocket engine and sending him soaring up into the sky at a breakneck speed as Kristoph looks upwards, a huge grin his face as he is glad to be rid of that narcissistic loudmouthed assistant director.

As Yuri soars into the upper parts of the atmosphere and lower portion of the stratosphere, he can feel the intense heat created by the friction of air resistance as his body bursts into flames; but despite devolving into a large fireball, Yuri merely laughs at the situation.

"Ha! This fire is nothing to a great man such as myself whose fiery passion and determination burns hotter and brighter than any flame; for no force, whether it be nature or man, can stop me, Yuri Cosmos, the greatest man to ever li-"

Yuri is silenced as he enters the void of space, where no one can here you scream or rave on about how great you think you are.

Ah, the majesty of space, a realm of absolute silence due to a lack of air. Good thing I'm wearing a- Yuri's eyes widen at the horrific reality that he is not wearing a spacesuit. This is most awful! I have to turn back… before… oxygen… depravation… kicks… But before he can finish his thoughts, Yuri is rendered unconscious from a lack of air.

The mass of Yuri's limp, unconscious body tilts his Galactic Scooter so that it is now careening to the Earth's surface in a huge ball of fire as it quickly descends back through the Earth's atmosphere before creating a Yuri Cosmos-shaped crater in the ground near Kristoph's position with a thunderous thud.

"You know, Cosmos was right; he was a shining star… a shooting star, that is!" Kristoph sneers at the camera. "I'm Kristoph Gavin, and I thank you for watching 'Debauched Steel'."