OMG I'm so sorry I didn't post anything yesterday and kept you wanting. I was experiencing writers block, but this time it wasn't so bad, I've had it for over a month once. Anyways, here's chapter 4? Yeah, I think? I don't know XD, a lot happens this chapter but it's more of an informational chapter, and we really get to see how Elena's feeling. Please leave a review and follow and favorite this story.

Elena's POV
Dear Diary,
Its been about four years since I've written to you, but I have I good explaination. I've been under this...spell, that Kai had put on me years ago; linking me to my best friend, putting me to sleep until he got his revenge; Bonnie dead. Anyways, I'm awake, with Bonnie still alive. I haven't seen her or Jeremy yet, but I cannot wait.
I haven't been able to think clearly lately. I'm sure you can figure out why...Damon. Just the thought of him out there, alone and scared, is hurting me. He's still fighting, I can tell. We kissed, yeah, even though Damon is under this, I don't know what to call it...possession? Sure. He's possessed, (that just sounds weird) by this Siren named Sybil, based on what I've picked up on her, she's a bitch. I don't know how I'm going to bring him back, and get rid of this Siren, but I'll die trying if that's what it takes.
Elena Gilbert
It's the morning after the Christmas Party, aka, Christmas Day. I'm refusing to get out of bed unless I know how I'm going to save Damon or at least find him. He disappeared after the party yesterday without looking back. I don't know how many times I've said this but I can tell he's fighting this possession. He wants to feel, someone just has to break down his walls and show him the way. And that someone is going to be me.
"Elena!" Care screams from downstairs. I groan and lift Damon's covers over my head.
Then all of a sudden I hear children screaming my name. I poke my head out; making sure I haven't lost it. There's two kids jumping on my bed, pulling the covers off me. I sit up; confused as hell.
"Care!" I yell out confused. Staring at the kids.
Caroline comes walking in my room, leaning on the opened door. "What?" She asks as if she didn't even see the kids on my bed.
I focus back on the children, whose stopped jumping and are now just sitting in front of me. I reach my hand on and touch one of the kids on the shoulder. They giggle and start hopping again on my bed, this time yelling out, 'Aunt Elena' what is going on?
"Care...who are they..." I say, still staring at the children shouting 'aunt Elena'.
"Oh my god! I totally forgot!" She starts cracking up, "Girls, go down stairs, Daddy's making pancakes." Daddy? Who the hell is 'Daddy'?
I look blankly at Care, whose still laughing. "Care? Who were those kids? And why were they calling me Aunt Elena?"
"This is going to be confusing, so try to catch up." She smiles and sits on the bed.
Care tells me about how Jo's coven transported the twins when she wa dying so that their coven will live on, and the twins ended up with Care; even though she's a vampire, those rules didn't apply, so to make a long story short, Jo and Ric's babies ended up in Care so Ric and Care have kids...whoa. While she was telling me this, I forced myself to get out of bed and get dressed. No matter how badly I just wanted to lie in bed, obsessing over Damon, I have to move forward. I have to.
After Care catches me up on the whole twin thing, we walk down stairs and join Ric and Stefan. Ric's in the kitchen with the kids, and Stefan is in the library writing in his journal. I haven't even thought about how Stefan must be feeling about his brother. I join Stefan in the library, he hasn't notices that I'd sat next to him; too lost in his thoughts.
"Stefan." I stare at him; waiting for him to acknowledge me.
"Sorry, Elena." He apologized, finishing his entry.
"No, it's fine. I wanted to ask you something." A look of concern washed over me.
"Sure, anything." He has noticed that this was serious. He placed his journal down on the coffee table and sat up so that he would be facing me.
"Yesterday..." I began. I can see that me bringing up yesterday made him feel uneasy.
"When Sybil told Damon to kill me; you shouted out to me th- that," I stuttered; reliving the moment in my head. "Damon has changed, that he's not the same person I had left behind 4 years ago...do- do you belive that? Do you think he's too far gone?" I look down; unable to face Stefan. Why did I say that? I can already see that he's hurting.
"Elena...you've missed a lot in the past years, I use to think, and hey, maybe I still do think this but I would believe that Damon just needed hope. You know? He just needed someone to hold on to, or else...he would let go. And we would lose him for good." Stefan said under his breath. I could tell that this was what he was writing about before I came in because his words came so naturally and easily. This had hurt me to finally hear someone admit how far Damon was gone out loud. "But now that you're hear...I thiknk he's found that person he needed to hold onto. You, Elena. He needs you. I saw that, Elena. I saw the way he looked at you yesterday. Something inside of him shattered. He's going to try to push you away, but you cannot let him. You can't let him do this alone..." He paused. Taking a deep breath, thinking about something before saying it. Then he nodded to himself, "Elena, whatever it is you're planning on helping Damon. Count me in. We're in this together." He smiles.
I lean over and hug him. "Thank you, Stefan."

Damon's POV
I've haven't been able to get Elena out of my head. I keep reliving out kiss we shared outside last night. I was suppose to kill her, instead, I find myself kissing her. What am I doing? Knowing Elena, she's going to stop at nothing to find me and help save me from myself even if it's going to get her killed, and it might...
I managed to trick Sybil into thinking that Elena means nothing to me anymore. But I know once Sybil knows the truth, she'll do anything until Elena is either dead or out of the picture. That's why it's best for Elena's safety if I just stay away from her. I don't know what I would do with myself if my actions gets Elena hurt...or worse. I love her too much to let myself bring harm upon her. Even though, staying away from her is absolutely the last thing I want to do, I have to for her safety. That's all that matters anymore.
Sybil can't ever, and I mean ever, find out about my real feelings for Elena. Those feelings that have survived through months of torture, those feelings that have kept me from completely flipping my switch and just...giving up. If Sybil does anything to Elena to use against me...I don't think I'll survive.

Elena's POV
This is by far the worst Christmas I've had. Not that it's bad or anything, it's actually really peaceful and sweet with the kids and all. But I'm not spending it with the one person I wanted to. And I don't think I even need to say his name. You know who I'm talking about.
The girls just finished unwrapping their gifts, and I've only known them for what? 3 hours tops? And I feel like a shitty aunt for not getting them anything. But in my defense, I only woke up 60 years too early; linked to Bonnie...Bonnie. Holy shit. I totally forgot about Bonnie. I haven't seen her and she probably doesn't even know I'm awake right now; we all went straight to bed after Damon left yesterday, so it's not like we had any time to tell her.
With my luck, here she comes right now with Enzo.
The door flies open, like Enzo just took a foot to it. He's carrying at least 5 gifts in his arms and places them down under the tree. He looks over and begins walking towards the door. He does a double take, this time staring at me, with his jaw dropping. I just give an awkward smile back at him; not knowing how to respond.
Bonnie comes walking by him placing a wine bottle on the coffee table infront of the tree. She of course faces the other direction that I'm in so now her back is facing me. Care lets out a small giggle, and Stefan and Ric just smile, waiting for Bonnie to realize.
I just get more comfortable on the couch, knowing that this might take awhile. Bonnie is in the process of removing her coat and placing it on a near by chair. I swear I can hear crickets in the room. Bonnie is probably at a good 3 minutes without noticing that her life long friend has basically risen from the dead. I'm starting to grow impatient.
I clear my throat as loudly as I humanly could at the time. "Ah-ehm." And again. "Ah-ehm!" Even louder.
"What!?" Bonnie stays fusterated and turns around. "ELENA!" She jumps in my arms.
"Ow, Bonnie. You're. Crushing. Me!" She ignores my comment and sqeezed me more, it was obivious she wasn't planning on letting go.
"Oh my god, Elena." She cried into the hug.
After 5 minutes, Bonnie let me breath; releasing me from the deadly embrace.
Bonnie and I haven't let each others sides since, she's even trying to convince Enzo into staying the night in the guest bedroom. She's acting like if she leaves me for a second I'll be back asleep in that casket. Between you and me...I'm afraid to go to the bathroom; thinking Bonnie will come running in, freaking out, making sure I'm still awake. Silly, isn't it?
Ooh! Before I forget...Klaus. So now that I've been thinking about it. He just shows up when I wake up; in his best behavior, drives me all the way down to Mystic Falls, and just leaves? He was acting strange with Sybil. Oh my god! Do you think there's- you know- history there between them? Oh my gosh, I got to tell Bonnie all this.

Hours later, Bonnie ended up persuading Enzo into staying for the night, but with Bonnie, it's gonna end up turning into at least a month.
Not only do I have the problem with Damon; you know, finding it and shit. But now I can't get Klaus and Sybil out of my head. Were they together? I've never seen Klaus tense up like that with anyone, maybe he did a little bit with Katherine but besides her, no one. Oh. Nope. I take that back. He acted the exact same way when his mother and father came back in the mix of things.
I need to clear my head...
"Care, Stefan, Bonnie...I'm going for a walk don't wait up on me." I yell out, heading for the door.
"Okay!" Care yells.
I smile and walk out the front door. Whoa. So much as happened in the past 24 hours, I'm surprised I haven't passed out. I stroll down the same path I use to years back when Damon got on my nerves or we had an argument. Ugh. How's that possible. Even when I'm recalling even the worst memories between us, I still feel these- these butterflies in my stomach.
I take a deep breath and just colaplse on the dirty forest ground; looking up at the starry night.
"What's wrong with me...why can't I stop thinking of him..." I whisper to myself. I bring my hands up and cover my eyes; hoping to cure my headache.
"Who? Me?" I hear a voice say, coming from behind me.
I turn around, still lying on the ground. "Damon?" I say under my breath.
"Hi." He smirks at me; slowing walking towards me.
"H-hi?" I stare at him with a distored look on my face.
He smirks once more and joins me looking up at the night. We lie there in silence.
"What are you doing here?" I whispter, knowing that he'll hear me, no matter what.
"Same as you." He mumbles, still staring up at the night sky.
I look over at him. "And what is it that I'm doing?"
"Thinking..." He looks over at me. Staring at my eyes, then my lips, then back at my eyes. "About us...right?"
"...Maybe..." I give him a small smile; teasing him. I pick myself up off the ground, walking away.
"Hey!" Damon yells, hurrying to pick himself up; chasing after me.
"Can I help you?" I say annoyed but still teasing him. In other words I'm playing hard to get for disappearing on me yesterday.
Still trying to catch up to me. "Elena, wait up." He laughs.
"Why?" I look back at him for a second, still quickening my pace.
"I wanted-" He vamps infront of me. I stop and stare into his sweet, blue eyes. "I wanted to see you, Elena." He says in a soothing manner.
I just stare at him, clueless on how I should respond. Do I kiss him...or do I just play it off cool?
"I wanted to say goodbye." He looks down, pain grows in his eyes. But he looks up and grabs my hand; pulling me into him. Placing a passionate kiss upon my lips. Sending chills down my spine. My nerves go on hyperdrive, I feel like he's touching every square inch of my body. Wait? Goodbye?
I pull away. "Goodbye?!"
"Shut up and kiss me." He ignores my question, smirks at me and pulls me back in, continuing the kiss.
No matter how much I've wanted to do this. There's still one question still on the table. 'I wanted to say goodbye.' What?! What the hell does that mean? Goodbye?! This can't be goodbye!

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