DISCLAIMER: Me and my sister own nothing
Next chapter... yaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn,
Plz forgive ME. QueenOfFanFicWorldLoveGunner, because I have NO IDEA how to spell Bathised. .
I love to play with it though, making little skits full of Silent Hill scenarios where Itachi goes badass- "You cleanse people with your flames, and today I will bathtise you."
Quo Uchiha glare, awesomness, and Deidara shivering in a corner. XD
Meanwhile- sissy cannot grasp the concept of badass Tachi'. Apparently.
-Chapter four: Bathised in the River-
"Morning everyone!" Itachi said cheerfully. The other members groaned pulling themselves out of their tents.
Pain cleared his throut to tell everyone todays agenda. "Hidan, Kakuzu Itachi and Kisame can return the Onbu to it's home. Jiraiya told me of them and they should reunite peacefully."
"Fine fine fine." Hidan moaned. Kakuzu shook his head at the partners stupidity before putting down his money stash to follow him.
Itachi and Kisame followed after them chattering about simple things. Pain continued, "Deidara Sasori and Tobi. You all can go back and look at the birds some more."
"YAY! BIRDS!"
"Shut up Tobi!" Deidara yelled at him for the upteenth time. "You'll scare them all away! hn,"
"OKAY! Tobi good boy." Tobi muttered. Deidara looked around realizing his other partner was already dissapering from view... again...
"What the hell Sasori? wait up!"
Pain smiled weakly. "Me and Konan can... just go look at cute, furry, safe animals." He rubbed his head. "Zetsu, you stay here and try not to scare Hidan again ok-" Turning around. He noticed that Konan had fallen back asleep leaning agenst their tent. Everyone else was gone. "-...Or maybe we could stay and keep watch," He said to himself.
Meanwhile-
"Goddammit Kakuzu why won't this little demon come off!"
"Oh Hidan, don't yell you might scare him," Itachi cooed.
"Shut the hell up Uchiha!" But just when he said that the Onbu started crieing and jumped off Hidan's back.
"Uhhh, it's gettin' away," Kisame said. Kakuzu stood behind him counting money...
"Who the hell cares? good riddins' I say!" Hidan yelled again.
"You know," Itachi started. "If we let a little baby Onbu escape and the mother goes rampant. Lady Tsunade will probably sue us."
"DAMMIT HIDAN GET OFF YOUR ASS AND GO AFTER THAT FLUFF BALL!" Kakuzu started running after it. Hidan groaned again but followed.
" 'Tachi, would the Hokage really sue us?" Kisame asked.
"No, but it got them moving didn't it?" Itachi smiled deviously.
"You sneaky weasel you." Kisame laughed
"Lets go help," Itachi said and the two went off after the immortals.
Meanwhile again-
"Sasori-no-Danna I said WAIT UP!"
"Speed up." He groaned.
"SHUT UP!"
Tobi hops over infront of Deidara. "Lookie! pretty birds!"
"Yeah yeah, pretty ." Deidara grumbled. He looked around, a large leaf was on a rock and next to the rock was a giant mud puddle. Deidara smiled and after a few moments caught up to Sasori. "Oh No-Danna." He called.
"What?"
"I have something for you," He cooed innocently
"Your untimely demise?" Deidara smiled again before pushing the leaf full of mud in his face.
Sasori slowly brought his hand up and wiped it off his face. Deidara took a few steps back before Sasori lunged and started chasing after him.
Tobi started following them thinking they were playing tag. All the way thinking aloud "I wonder if Konan and Zetsu and Pain are having as much fun?"
Meanwhile-
"Ahh-CHOO!"
"Uh, Konan? are you okay?"
"Yeah yeah, nothing to worry about." She shiffled
"If you say so," Pain muttered. He sat on a log-seat trieing to restart the fire.
"Hm, where is everyone?" Konan asked looking around.
"Doing what I told them to do." He looked up for a minute. "...For once."
"ACHOO!"
"Konan are you really okay?"
"Yesyesyesyes I'm fine don't worry about me." She tried to reassure with a plugged nose.
"Maybe you should at least take a nap or lie down?"
"No." She growled getting her regular voice back. "Lets just go look for cute furry little creatures and make sure they're not mutated or anything."
"Uhhh, I can do that you just stay here and rest."
Konan glared at him, "Oh, look, 'Tachi, he can do- oh they're all back," She said widening her eyes and looking over to the forest part that had the rest of the Akatsuki grumbleing over.
"Deidara, Sasori," Itachi asked after he got close enough to the artist. "Why are you covored in mud?"
"Cuz' Sasori-no-Danna pushed me into the river... After I shoved mud in his face. hnm."
"We were bonding." Sasori said sarcasticly wearing a sadistic grin.
"Tobi played in it too!" The century-old child gleed to his great-great-grandson of some sort. Itachi looked at him for a second, "...Tobi is a goodboy!"
Kisame looked at the group wearily. "...I'm going to bed. 'Tachi?"
"We shall," Itachi followed the tired blue man into their tent.
Sasori opted for staying in the woods so he could clean himself. Deidara took Tobi over to the river to clean themselves before going to bed.
Even though everyone had left earshot-slash-fallen asleep already. Pain still raised his arms half-heartedly. "Um, okay! everyone get a good nights sleep and we can do it all again tomarrow!" He then started wondering if every morning was just going to be following fluffy and dangerous animals. He went back into his and Konan's tent hating his life... more.
"Achoo!"
As I recall, and according to the authors note that was originally here- It took her forever to write this.
GAH! She makes Pain wimpy, Dei a whore, and Itachi effectively unbadass...
Forget I said that, she doesn't know I'm writting this XD
I hope she doesn't review the story after I post it.