Inuyasha's Journal

by Shanteru

Inuyasha is in a battle with Naraku and his brood when he looses his journal. Rin finds the journal and gives it Sesshoumaru who reads it and finds out alot about his brother and Inuyasha's past. This fanfiction's rating will go up as the story goes along

4. Chapter 4 The Father Comes Back

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character. I do not own the songs on this fan fiction.

Chapter four: The Father comes back

Kagome started to wake up and when she opened her eyes the only thing she saw was a fuzzy picture of the mysterious stranger. He was looking at the situation and Kagome was trying to focus on the stranger.

He looked on the scene. The boys were gone and all that was left was two demons and three humans. He knew from the smell that the one looking at him trying to focus her eyes was the mate of the half demon he could smell his scent on her and hers on him. His scent was on all of them but the fox demon and the young human girl had it the most.

Naraku had no idea who this person was and really didn't care. He set Kagura on him and she was sent back by his claws. Kagome finally focused her eyes and knew who he was. Kagome got up and turned toward him. She smiled at him and to everyone's surprise he smiled back at her.

Kagome said, "I thought you would hear it and that you would come. You have to get us out of here."

He said, "Did he do all this?"

Kagome said, "Yeah he did."

Shippou was crying and was trying to make sense of everything.

He said, "Ok then don't worry I will get you out of there."

Kagome said, "You have to aim for the spider mark on hi..."

Naraku didn't want her telling him anymore so he slammed her into the ground. No one but the mysterious man and all the demons knew that Kagome was dead. Naraku had smash her into the stone ground and he threw her over to where the boys were.

Shippou sobbed, "Mommy?"

The mysterious stranger was really pissed now he went after Naraku and attacked him head on. He knew what she had been doing and aimed for the spider mark on Naraku's back once he saw. He disposed of Naraku in a short while. Kagura took off and fled for her life.

Shippou went over to Kagome and Inuyasha who were lying right next to each other after Naraku threw Kagome over to Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru. He just started to cry and Sango went to go over there but the mysterious stranger got there first. He picked Shippou up and did exactly as Inuyasha would have done. He held Shippou in his arms and let a low growl come into his chest and Shippou calmed down considerably.

He said, "Don't worry alright I will fix it."

He put Shippou down on the ground and went over to Sesshoumaru. He grabbed Tenseiga then moved where he could get all three in one swipe and he used Tenseiga to bring them back. They all watched as Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha got up as well as Kagome. Inuyasha just wrapped his arms around Kagome so hard she had to tell him to let her go. Shippou ran over to them and he jumped at Inuyasha who put his arms around him. Sesshoumaru on the other hand was looking at the mysterious stranger who now held Tenseiga.

Sesshoumaru said, "Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha looked at him then looked at who he was looking at and the first thing he did was put his family behind him and start to growl. The man thought this display of courage was warranted and he didn't feel bad for it. How could he when the last time he had seen the hanyou was the day he was born.

He handed Tenseiga to Sesshoumaru and said, "I think this is yours."

Sesshoumaru took Tenseiga and said, "Thank you."

He turned to Inuyasha and handed him Tetsusaiga and said, "And I think this one belongs to you."

Inuyasha knew this man was a full demon so why was he able to hold his Tetsusaiga but he took it from him without a thank you at all. He was still growling at him as well.

Sesshoumaru said, "Inuyasha calm down alright he won't hurt your family."

Inuyasha did as Sesshoumaru had said and calmed down but he still didn't like this man. Inuyasha sniffed toward him and he knew that smell but couldn't place it in anyway.

Sesshoumaru said, "Why are you here anyway?"

He said, "You don't sound happy to see me Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru said, "I will get to that once you tell me why you are here when you are dead?"

Inuyasha looked between Sesshoumaru and the man but couldn't place anything that to him looked familiar to him.

He said, "I am here because I was called here. I came because you and your brother needed help."

Sesshoumaru said, "Well we don't need you so go back to Hell where you belong."

Kagome said, "Sesshoumaru?"

He looked at her and said, "You never should have called him here Kagome. He didn't need to be disturbed."

The mysterious man said, "Sesshoumaru I don't mind alright. I would much rather be here then back where I was."

Sesshoumaru said, "That's not the point alright. The point is she never should have called to you for help."

He said, "Sesshoumaru do not perceive me as inferior or weak. Have some respect for your brother's mate or you will deal with me. She did what she thought was right at that time."

Sesshoumaru said, "Yes sir."

They had never heard him submit in the years he had known him and Inuyasha knew that there had to be something to this man if he made Sesshoumaru submit. Inuyasha looked at the man but couldn't place where he saw his face and smelt his smell before.

Inuyasha said, "Ok just who are you by the way?"

Sesshoumaru was going to answer him when the man said, "No one you need to worry about Inuyasha."

The man had turned and was going to leave when Inuyasha looked at Sesshoumaru who mouthed a single word, Father. Then looked dead at Inuyasha.

Inuyasha looked back at the man and said, "How could Kagome call you from the dead father?"

The man stopped and didn't turn he said, "Sesshoumaru why did you tell him?"

Sesshoumaru said, "He had a right to know father I am sorry for that but he had a right. He asked you a question that I know he wants answered."

The man said, "You know how she did it so you tell him."

With that the man left them alone. Inuyasha didn't understand why his father didn't want to talk to him. He felt hurt for the first time since Sesshoumaru treated him with hatred. He looked at Sesshoumaru who saw the hurt in Inuyasha's eyes before it was put behind a mask just like his own.

Sesshoumaru said, "She is a miko. Father died the day you were born. He died protecting you and your mother. For that if he is needed by any of his children and someone who loves them enough calls to him. He is able to come back and help them. There is one draw back to that though."

Inuyasha said, "What is that?"

Sesshoumaru said, "He can't go back to being dead until he is killed again. He will be here until he dies again."

Kagome said, "So he gets a second chance than."

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah one that he doesn't want."

Sesshoumaru took off toward his camp and Inuyasha wanted to go after his father but he knew he had to stay here and protect his family and friends.

He looked at Kagome and said, "Can you guys go back to Kaede's village? I have to do something and I can't protect you. I will meet you guys there and Kagome you can go home if you want to. I will come and get you when I come back."

They nodded and Kagome went over to him and wrapped her arms around him. She placed her head against his chest.

She whispered, "Tell him I am sorry for disturbing his sleep. I hope you get a second chance to be with him Inuyasha."

They left in the direction of Kaede's village. Inuyasha went into the direction that his father had went. He followed his scent all the way to a grave he knew well. It was his mother's grave and Inuyasha approached him.

He was about an arms length away from him when he stopped.

Inuyasha said, "She loved you a lot. She missed you a lot too."

He said, "Why did you follow me here Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "I wanted to know something that's all."

He said, "Why can't you ask your brother?"

Inuyasha said, "I could ask Sesshoumaru but it wouldn't be the truth. Its something I need to ask you because it concerns you."

He said, "What is it you want to know?"

Inuyasha said, "Do you blame me for your death?"

He said, "No I don't Inuyasha. I never would I wasn't long for this world when I came to protect you in the first place. See that very day I had battled with Ryuukoytsusei and I had sealed him to a mountain side which is probably where he still is. I was injured really badly and I was dying when I left Sesshoumaru to go protect your mother and you."

Inuyasha said, "Actually father Ryuukoytsusei isn't pinned anymore. Naraku let him loose and he had a Jewel shard embedded in his mask."

He said, "So he still lives. I will deal with him later."

Inuyasha said, "Actually I already did same with Menoumaru. I killed them both with Tetsusaiga and my claws. Menoumaru was actually killed with my backlash wave and Kagome's sacred arrow."

He turned to Inuyasha and regarded him with eyes that were bright and wide. He smiled and laughed.

He said, "You did something I couldn't do. I am proud of you Inuyasha but you should be getting back to your family and friends. Do not worry about me I will be fine?"

He turned away from him and was back to looking at Izayoi's grave.

Inuyasha said, "I sent them back to the village and Kagome is going to go home beyond the bone eater's well. So they are going to be fine. I will leave it that's what you really want of me father."

Inutaishou heard the pain in Inuyasha's voice as he said the last part. He knew that Inuyasha just wanted to spend some time with him while he had the chance to do so.

He said, "Why would you want to spend time with me Inuyasha I abandoned you and your mother as well as your brother?"

Inuyasha said, "That wasn't by your choice. You would have stayed with us if you could have. And mom died when I was five and Sesshoumaru has never been nice to me except for today. I think something is wrong with him actually."

Inutaishou said, "No there is nothing wrong with him I think he just realized that he has to protect you now. That's all. You have a family now to protect and he knows that you will be more preoccupied with protecting them to protect yourself from harm."

Inuyasha wanted to just run up and hug his father but knew better than to do that. He had remembered what happened when a prince had done that to his father when he came back from war. He was smacked and pushed aside but Inuyasha didn't think his father would do that to him but he wasn't sure.

Inuyasha said, "Father do you regret protecting us?"

He got up and round on Inuyasha. He grabbed him by his neck and slammed him into a tree.

He said, "I don't regret anything I did. Except that I wasn't there enough for either of you boys especially you Inuyasha."

He let him go and fell to his knees. He wrapped his arms around Inuyasha.

He said, "I am so sorry Inuyasha that I left you alone here. You must hate me for it."

Inuyasha said, "I don't hate you father and you have nothing to be sorry about. If it weren't for you I wouldn't be here right now."

Inutaishou looked up at him and smiled. Inuyasha smiled back at him and wrapped his own arms around his father. He was just happy to finally be able to have his father. After a while they quit hugging and Inuyasha sat on a huge boulder looking at his mother's grave and his father sat below the boulder looking at the sunrise over the horizon. Inuyasha knew that this night was going to be his human night.

Inuyasha said, "I can't stay with you tonight father. I am sorry but I will be back in the morning."

He said, "Why can't you stay tonight?"

Inuyasha wasn't looking at his father but his father was looking at him.

Inuyasha said, "Tonight is the no moon. I don't want to seem weak to you that's all."

Inutaishou said, "Inuyasha just because you are going to be human tonight doesn't make you weak. In fact I think that is a strength because you get a chance to be with both of your heritage."

Inuyasha said, "It's a weakness I hate. Kagome and us are collecting Shikon no tama jewel shards and once its whole I plan on making myself a full fledged demon like Sesshoumaru and you."

Inutaishou said, "Do you hate me for making you a half demon?"

Inuyasha said, "No I don't hate you for that. I couldn't hate you for it ever. Even if I was treated like a mongrel when I was little. I couldn't hate you father. I love you too much to hate you."

Inutaishou said, "I am sorry for the way you were treated Inuyasha if I had never gotten involved with your mother than you wouldn't be a half demon."

Inuyasha said, "Don't alright. Its not your fault. It's the people who threw rocks at me, beat me, and chased me that are to blame. You loved mother and for that I am not mad. I am mad and hate Sesshoumaru for it though. He could have saved me many times but instead me decided to ignore me and to attack me continuously with no remorse for anything or anyone."

Inutaishou looked at his son and smelt the pain coming from him. It broke his heart to smell that coming from his own child. But he didn't press the matter much.

Inutaishou said, "You can stay with me. You will be safe with me I won't let anything hurt you tonight I promise."

Inuyasha said, "If that's what you want father. I will stay with you."

They sat there for the longest time doing nothing and saying nothing. Inuyasha knew that his mother had always loved his singing and he always sang for her when he came to visit to her.

Inuyasha took a deep breath and began to sing,

I walk a lonely road the only one I have ever known.

Don't know where it goes but its under me and I walk alone.

I walk this empty street on the boulevard of broken dreams.

When the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk alone.

I walk alone, I walk alone.

I walk alone, I walk a..

My shadows the only one that walks beside me.

My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating.

Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me.

Till then I walk alone.

Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh.

I'm walking down the line that divides me somewhere in my mind.

On the borderline, of the edge, and where I walk alone.

Read between the lines what's fucked up and everything's alright.

Check my vital signs and know I'm still alive and I walk alone.

I walk alone, I walk alone.

I walk alone, I walk a..

My shadows the only one that walks beside me.

My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating.

Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me.

Till then I walk alone.

Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh.

I walk alone, I walk a...

I walk this empty street on the boulevard of broken dreams.

When the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk a..

My shadows the only one that walks beside me.

My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating.

Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me.

Till then I walk alone.

Inuyasha quit singing and Inutaishou was listening to him sing and it felt sad to him. Inuyasha knew that song was his mother's favorite song by far. He knew another one and it was his favorite. He heard it back in Kagome's time once and he liked it a lot.

Inuyasha took a deep breath and began singing,

Been given 24 hours

To tie up loose ends

To make amends

Her eyes said it all

I started to fall

And the silence deafened

Head spinning round

No time to sit down

Just wanted to

Run and run and run

Be careful they say

Don't wish life away.

Now I've one day

And I can't believe

How I've been wasting my time

In 24 hours they'll be

Laying flowers

On my life, It's over tonight

I'm not messing no I

Need your blessing

And your promise to live free

Please do it fir me.

Is there a heaven a hell

And will I come back

Who can tell

Now I can see

What matter to me

Its as clear as crystal

The places I've been

The people I've seen

Plans that I made

Start to fade

The sun's setting gold

Thought I would grow old,

It wasn't to be

And I can't believe

How I've been wasting my time.

In 18 hours they'll be laying flowers

On my life, it's over tonight

I'm not messing no I

Need your blessing

And your promise to live free

Please do it for me.

In 13 hours they'll be

Laying flowers

on my life, it's over tonight

I'm not messing no I

Need your blessing

And your promise to live free

Please so it for me

I'm not alone, I sense it, sense it

All that I said, I meant it, I meant it

And I can't believe

How much I've wasted my time

In just 8 hours they'll be

Laying flowers

On my life, it's over tonight

I'm not messing no I

Need your blessing

And your promise to live free

Please do it for me

In just 1 hour they'll be

Laying flowers

On my life, It's over tonight

I'm not messing no I

Need your blessing

And your promise to live free

Please do it for me.

Inutaishou had heard Inuyasha singing another song and the sun was going down over the horizon behind them. Inuyasha knew that the transformation was starting and he was fine sitting up on the boulder but when his ears started to move he screamed and fell backward off the boulder. His father got up and jumped over the boulder to help his son. He saw Inuyasha lying on the ground. He was grabbing his head and Inutaishou had no idea what was wrong all he knew is that his son needed him. So he knelt down and picked Inuyasha up in his arms and let out a really low growl that did nothing to help him.

Kagome was on her way back with the others when she remembered that it was the night of the new moon that night. She had to get back to Inuyasha who she knew would be freaking out later that night.

She said, "Sango I need to borrow Kirara. I have to go back to Inuyasha."

Sango said, "Why he should be fine he's with his father?"

Kagome said, "It's the night of the no moon. His father won't know what's going on and if I know Inuyasha he will take off on his father and go to be by himself. I have to find him before something bad happens to him."

Sango let Kagome take Kirara to go find Inuyasha. She left Shippou with them because she didn't want him to get lost or hurt either. She couldn't protect them both and stay safe herself. She went off toward where they had left Inuyasha and Kirara picked up his scent on the wind. Kagome saw the sun go down behind the horizon and she feared they wouldn't find Inuyasha on time. Then they spotted him in the clearing with his father. She saw him grabbed his head and fall from the bolder he was sitting on and she could hear his screams. His father was trying to comfort him but he didn't know how.

Inutaishou was trying to comfort Inuyasha as best he could but it wasn't working then out of nowhere the young woman that had summoned him came to his aid. She knelt down next to them and Inutaishou gave him to her. He watched as she held him tightly and rocked him back and forth in her arms humming. She looked like his mother for a moment and then out of nowhere Inuyasha turned into her chest and started to cry. Kagome knew why but his father didn't know why his son was crying.

Kagome ran her fingers through his now black hair saying, "Its alright Inuyasha I am right here. I'm not going anywhere. I am so sorry for leaving you tonight of all nights. I forgot tonight was your human night."

Inuyasha sobbed, "Its alright Kagome I asked you to go I wasn't going to stay with my father either but he insisted I stay."

He looked at his father who looked hurt a little bit and he went to go over to him but saw the look in his father's eyes and knew better than to go over to him. He saw the same hatred that he had seen in Sesshoumaru's eyes the one time he had allowed his brother to see him change into a human. He stayed with Kagome. He couldn't believe his own father hated him in his human form. He looked at the ground and let silent tears fall from his eyes. He thought My own father doesn't even want me anymore. What did I do to deserve him to hate me? He said he was sorry for leaving me and now he hates me. I wish I had my journal back so I could write in it again. I just wish I knew where it was. I wonder who has it and what they are doing with it at this moment.

Sesshoumaru was sitting in a tree just above his camp while the others were sleeping. He reached into his kimono and pulled Inuyasha's journal out and opened it to where he had left off at.

Sesshoumaru read:

Well I found out about my brother. He is still in father's castle but he has changed. He has become cold to everyone around him. Not even father's old friends know why this change has occurred in my brother. One very old friend named Ruu said that it happened right after he found out I was pinned to the tree by Kikyo. He was in the middle of a battle with the cat demons and I wasn't there to help him. I think he resents me for either leaving him alone or for not helping him defeat the cat demons. Father defeated their leader a long time ago and they came back for revenge I guess. I heard Sesshoumaru and his army sent those damn felines running back home with their tails between their legs and their fur standing on end. I just hope that once my brother finds out that I am alive and well then he will be as he once was but there is really no guarantee that this will happen. He may hate me more than he did before. I know that my brother hates me for being a half demon everyone does. Even Kikyo hated me as a half demon. I realize that now. She would never touch me in any way while I was a half demon on when I was human. Then she loved me and would take walks with me under the stars. There was never a moon for us to walk under because I am only human one time of month and that is when the moon is no more. I always wanted someone to help me on those nights. It is very painful when my hanyou ears slid down to where the human ones are. I am scared when my sight, hearing, and smell go to that of a human because I can't defend myself as I can in my half demon form and I can not protect the ones that I love or that I consider my friends.

Kagome and me are going to go look for the jewel shards since she shattered it by accident. I yelled at her for it but I know she didn't mean to. I can't let her know that I didn't mean to yell at her because I don't really know how to say I am sorry to a girl. In fact I am kind of shy around her. The only girl I have ever talked to was Kikyo and she died and left me alone. So now I have to get used to having Kagome around me all the time. She often goes home. She lived beyond the bone eaters well. If you jump into the well you are enveloped in blue light and then when you land on the bottom and you look up you have a roof over your head. That is her side of the well which is a thousand years into the future. Its weird there are no demons in her time. Everyone there is human not even my brother lives there. I don't know what happened to all the demons but she said that she would find out for me because I asked her what happened to them and she said she didn't know but she would find out someway or another.