Faint
Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter characters only Lucas.
I am a little bit of loneliness a little bit of disregard
Handful of complaints but I can't help the fact that everyone can see these scars
I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel
But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you to just believe this is real
So I let go, watching you, turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend what I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I got
I can't feel the way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't heal this damage anymore
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
I am a little bit insecure a little unconfident
Cause you don't understand I do what I can but sometimes I don't make sense
I am what you never wanna say but I've never had a doubt
It's like no matter what I do I can't convince you for once just to hear me out
So I let go watching you turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all I've got
I can't feel the way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal this damage anymore
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
No hear me out now
You're gonna listen to me, like it or not
Right now hear me out now
You're gonna listen to me, like it or not
Right now
Hermione had trouble falling asleep with all the worries she had to carry on her shoulders. She ended up having to tell a nurse she couldn't sleep and was given medicine. After that she slept peacefully through the night. There were no nightmares plaguing her dreams. It was a first in many years.
It was surprising but when Hermione woke up she actually felt refreshed, disregarding the fact that she still had bruises on her face.
Hermione got up from the bed and stretched her sore limbs. Her wrist was no longer broken but it still was sore. She headed to the bathroom to get changed into some clothes then realized the only clothes she had were the ones that she wore when she came in. There was no way she was going to put them back on with all the blood on them.
Hermione was just walking out of the bathroom to go ask one of the nurses if they had anything she could wear when Draco came walking in.
He was carrying a bag with him.
"Well at least you're looking better. Here I thought you could use some clothes. They should fit you look to be about the same size as my mother was." Draco said.
"Thank you. I was just about to ask the nurse for clothes." Hermione told him.
"Well once you're done changing we can get you checked out of here." Draco said.
"Sounds good, I will be out in a minute." Hermione told him.
Once Hermione was done changing she checked out and they left.
"So what do you want to do first? Look for an apartment, breakfast, or go get your things from his apartment?" Draco inquired.
"I think that we should go get my things. He should be at work and I don't want any confrontation today." Hermione said.
"Ok then lets go. After we get your things it would be good for you to eat." Draco said.
"Ok." Hermione answered.
They took Draco's car to the apartment. As they were getting closer Draco noticed Hermione was clenching her hands till they were white as snow. He reached over and grabbed her hands cautiously.
"You sure you want to do this?" He asked.
She took a minute to respond. She was shocked that he grabbed her hands.
"Yeah I am sure. I need to get my things; I at least need to get my books and pictures. I don't want to leave those in his hands. My clothes don't matter that much to me." Hermione said.
"Of course you wouldn't want to leave your books behind. You do know that you could replace those as well?" Draco chuckled.
"Well these books have meaning to them. I got some of them as gifts and others are extremely rare and old." Hermione defended.
"I bet you that anyone of those books you have I could find another one." Draco challenged.
"You're on. I will choose one of them and tell you the title to see if you can find another one exactly like it." Hermione said.
Draco just smiled. She would be shocked. He had just about every book anyone could imagine in his library at the manor. He would have to show her it one time. He was happy to see that she had stopped clenching her hands now. The conversation seemed to have lifted some of her worries away for the moment.
When they pulled up to the building he parked in front. He looked over at Hermione to see her reaction. She had gone pale.
"I could go in myself and get all of your stuff if you would like me to." Draco said.
"No I need to do this besides you don't know what to get." Hermione said.
"No offense Granger but I lived in the same room as you for a year I bet I could pick out all of your stuff in a heartbeat." Draco said with a grin. He loved getting her all worked up.
"That doesn't mean anything Malfoy. You never went into my bedroom, unless you went in there without my knowledge. Did you?" Hermione asked.
"If I did would I tell you?" Draco laughed out.
"True. Fine I don't care. I need to do this to try and get some closer. At least I want to know that I am not afraid of my past." Hermione said.
Draco got out of the car and walked around to her door and opened it. He was being so nice to her. She didn't understand why though but she wasn't going to question that at the moment. He was the only one that was helping her and believed her.
They walked to the elevator and went to the fourth floor. She took out her key and wand to get around the wards that Lucas had put up for her 'protection'.
Hermione hesitated a minute before walking in. She was praying that he wasn't going to be there like yesterday. She didn't want to deal with him at the moment. Plus she was afraid of what Lucas would do to Draco.
"I am going to go gather my clothes and books from the bedroom; could you get all of the pictures that around the living room and any books you may find lying around?" Hermione asked.
"Sure. Do you want me to put them in boxes?" Draco asked.
"Ummm……I don't think there are any boxes. Oh, wait hang on we can you my old school trunk. It's in the closet over there." Hermione said as she pointed to a door on Draco's right.
Draco went and got her old trunk out as she walked into the bedroom.
While Hermione was packing up her thing she started to shake. She was moving at a fast pass because she was afraid that Lucas would come home any minute. She thought about leaving a note but then thought that it was better if she didn't.
Draco finished way before Hermione did because he used magic to get all of her things into the trunk. It took Hermione at least 20 minutes to come out of the room. She was carrying nothing in her hands.
At Draco's questioning gaze Hermione smiled.
"Where is all of your stuff?" Draco asked.
"In my purse, we do posses magic you know? I shrunk all the suit cases and put it in here. If I didn't then all of my things might not have fit in the car." Hermione said.
"Good point. I got all of the pictures and the books that were out here sitting around. You ready to go?" Draco asked.
"More then ready, I have been on edge since we got here." Hermione said.
As they were walking out the door Hermione paused and looked back. She would never have to come back here again. She smiled and felt a great weight life off of her shoulders.
Once they had everything in the car and were on the road again Draco asked her where she wanted to go get a bit to eat.
"I was thinking that we could go to this café by the office. They have excellent coffee and pancakes." Draco said.
"Sound good to me and how do you even know what pancakes are? Most people in the Wizarding community wouldn't know what they are." Hermione mentioned.
"It's run by people who are obsessed with muggles." Draco told her.
When they got there Draco once again opened Hermione's door ad held out a hand to help her out of the car. Once they were seated Draco asked her where she wanted to look for an apartment.
"So where did you plan on living now?" Draco asked.
"I don't really have anywhere in mind as long as it is far away from Lucas. I just want it to be hard to find." Hermione told him.
"Ok well there are some apartment buildings around Hogsmead and Diagon Ally that we can check out once we are done here. While we are there you will also be able to pick up whatever else you need." Draco said.
"Ok sounds good. So what are you going to get?" Hermione asked.
"I am thinking of getting blueberry pancakes with bacon can't have a good breakfast without bacon and coffee. What about you?" Draco asked.
"I was thinking of an egg white omelet with hash browns and jasmine tea." Hermione told him
After they ordered and ate they headed out to start looking for an apartment.
"Ok so let's start near Hogsmead then you can get any necessities you need." Draco said.
They saw at least 5 apartments that Hermione didn't like at all. They were either extremely small or just gross. She would prefer to live near Hogsmead because that meant she could go to Hogwarts whenever she wanted and it would only be a walk away and she always loved Hogsmead.
She was giving up hope until she saw a small cottage up on the hill.
"Do you think anyone lives in that cottage up there on the hill? Could we go get a closer look at it?" Hermione asked Draco.
"Sure why not? It's the only place you have taken an interest in all day so we shall go find out the story on it." Draco told her.
The cottage was on a little hill that over looked Hogsmead on one side then the other side you could see Hogwarts. On the outside it was surrounded by orange roses that smelled divine. There were wooden shutters on all the windows. It looked like someone had lived there which made Hermione said.
When they got all the way up the cobblestone path that lead to the cottage they noticed that there was a sign on the door that said for rent. The biggest smile appeared on Hermione's face.
"Well it looks as if you're in luck Granger. Shall we contact the owner?" Draco asked.
"Oh yes." Hermione said.
While Draco contacted the owner Hermione walked around the outside perimeter. She looked in through one of the windows and noticed that the place was furnished already, in fact there was book shelves that had some books left on them. She was so happy that she might have actually found a place to live.
Hermione walked to the back and saw a small pond. She walked down to it and noticed that there were frogs and fish everywhere. She also saw a swan that had a few little babies following behind it. She prayed that the owner would let her rent this place for a reasonable price.
"Granger, Mrs. Davidson is more then happy to rent this place to you. It's actually a reasonable price to so you will be able to pay the rent on it and still go out and enjoy yourself." Draco told her.
"Really? That's great. When is she going to be for me to sign paper?" Hermione asked.
"We are going to be meeting her at 2 o'clock for lunch at The Three Broomsticks." Draco told her.
"Ok, so what are we going to do till then go shopping?" Hermione asked.
"Sure, where do you want to go? Do you want to shop here or go to Diagon Alley?" Draco asked.
"How about we go to Diagon Alley? I want to go to Flourish and Blotts to look at books and I would like to go to Madam Malkin's Robes to get some clothes for when I start work since you're here I will know what to get." Hermione said.
They chose to apparate to Diagon Alley instead of driving to the Leaky Cauldron. When they got there the streets were crowded with young witches and wizards that were shopping for school supplies. They walked directly to Flourish and Blotts so that Hermione could look at books.
When they were in the store they got separated for a while. Draco browsed for a while and found a few books that he found interesting and purchased them. After that he figured he would sit down in one of the chairs and wait for Hermione to come find him.
He sat there for over and hour before she finally appeared. She was carrying a bag that looked to be heavily loaded with books.
"Well I see you had a successful time. What did you but?" Draco asked.
"I got a few romance novels and a couple decorating books. I figured since I will be living in the cottage for a while I will decorate it." Hermione said.
"Interesting. I figured since you're a girl and all you would be able to do that without a book." Draco said.
"Well, I was never really good at those sorts of things. You saw how plain the apartment was." Hermione defended.
"Why don't we head over to Madam Malkin's? By the way you are not to pay for any of the clothes you but in there. It is on me since they are for work it is considered a business expense." Draco said.
"I am not going to let you but my clothes for me Malfoy. You are already helping me get the cottage since I wont have enough for this months rent." Hermione told him.
"You'll work off the first months rent and be able to pay for all the payments to come along with anything else you need. I am paying and that's final." Draco said.
"Fine but I refuse to buy anything that cost a lot. I am getting the cheapest things." Hermione said.
He ended up choosing the most expensive clothes there. She had no say in it because once he got her measurements he started telling the lady helping them what Hermione would be needing.
She ended up with several shirts in all colors. They weren't the kind of shirts that she was use to. They were tight and form fitting. He got her a skirt for every day of the week along with pants if she wanted to wear those instead. He made sure she had some dresses if she so chose to wear.
"Well I say that that was successful." Draco stated.
"Do you honestly think that I am going to need this many clothes?" Hermione asked.
"Yes, you need choices so you don't have to keep wearing the same things over and over again. Now lets go get you some shoes that go with these outfits." Draco said.
He had to be kidding. He had just spent a fortune on clothes that weren't even for him and now he wanted to buy her shoes.
"Really Malfoy I have shoes that will be just fine for work." Hermione insisted.
"I don't care you're getting new shoes." Draco told her.
She didn't know how anyone could have this many shoes. He got her shoe size the proceeded to buy her 5 pairs of high heels in different colors, 2 pairs of leather boots; he also insisted that she needed sandals in all styles that would be for the summer and regular tennis shoes.
They were both loaded down with bags by the time they were heading back to Hogsmead for lunch.
When they got to The Three Broomsticks Mrs. Davidson was already there waiting for them.
"Hello Mrs. Davidson." Draco said as he shook her hand.
Mrs. Davidson then proceeded to shake Hermiones hand.
"Thank you for meeting with us. I saw the cottage and I just fell in love with it. It's beautiful." Hermione told her.
"Thank you child. I lived there for 20 years almost with my husband. It was the perfect size for us since we couldn't have children." Mrs. Davidson said.
"Why don't we order food and get down to business?" Draco asked.
"Sounds wonderful." Hermione said.
After they ordered Hermione read over the contracts and papers but before she signed she had Draco look them over to see if what he discussed with her was stated. When he shook his head she signed them. It felt so good to know she had a home.
When they finished eating Draco paid for lunch and then proceeded to pay the first months rent. When Mrs. Davidson was gone they chose to walk around Hogsmead to see if Hermione needed anything else.
When she walked by a pet store she just had to go inside. She went straight to the kittens.
"Whatever happened to that ugly little beast you use to have?" Draco asked.
"He got sick during the summer before 7th year. He was old when I got him it was surprising he lived so long as it was and he wasn't ugly." Hermione said.
"So why didn't you get a new cat sooner?" Draco asked.
"Lucas didn't like cats so I never got one. I didn't get another one during school because it was to soon after Crookshanks." Hermione told him.
"Are you going to get one now?" Draco asked
"I think it would be nice to have company when I am at home." Hermione said.
There were kittens of all colors there. Hermione was having problems choosing which one she wanted. She finally narrowed it down to just two. One was a Siamese and the other was a black cat with blue eyes.
"I don't know which one to chose. What do you think?" Hermione asked Draco pointing to the two she was talking about.
"Well which one do you think would be best?" Draco asked.
"I am not sure their both so cute." Hermione said.
"I would say the black one because all witches are supposed to have black cats aren't they? Draco asked.
Hermione laughed. That was such a stereotype but she did like the little black one with blue eyes.
"I think I will go with your choice and get the black one." Hermione said.
After she got some kitten food, bowls, a litter box, and a collar she went and asked the girl working for assistance getting the kitten.
"Will this be all for you?" the sales girl asked.
"Yes, is the kitten a boy or a girl?" Hermione asked.
"It's a boy." She said.
Hermione paid and they walked out and ran into the people Hermione didn't want to see at the moment.
"Hermione where have you been and why are you with Malfoy? We have all been really worried about you." Ron said as he went to hug her.
Hermione stepped out of reach before he could. She moved closer to Draco to put distance between herself and her friends.
"What do you mean you have been worried?" Hermione asked.
"Lucas owled us and said that you didn't come home last night and that he didn't know where you were." Harry said.
"Well if you were so worried then why didn't you call me?" Hermione asked.
"Lucas told us that you didn't have your cell phone on you. He told us that you had a fight and over reacted and left last night and didn't come back." Ron said.
"What were you thinking? Leaving at night by yourself, do you know how dangerous it is out here? It doesn't matter that you're a witch either. Just cause you had a fight doesn't mean you walk out and leave. Do you know how frantic Lucas has been?" Harry asked.
"Typical." Hermione muttered.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Harry asked.
"It's typical that you automatically blame me for everything. I didn't leave because of a damn fight. I left because I needed to go to St. Mungos where I stayed the night for observation. I highly doubt that he is worried at all. All he cares about is that his dinner is done." Hermione said.
"Why did you go to St. Mungos and why is Malfoy with you?" Harry asked.
"Lucas didn't tell you? Surprising since you guys are all buddy buddy. I mean you guys are always going out with him. I was there because for the oh, I don't know hundredth time he had beaten me to the point where I was going to faint. Malfoy is here because he helped me get to St. Mungos since I was incapable of getting there on my own." Hermione said.
"Hermione you have to have it all wrong. Lucas would never lay a hand on you and you know that. Besides if you had been being beaten you would have told us. We are your best friends. Now lets take you back to Lucas so you two can short this all out." Ron said as he went to take her arm.
Hermione walked out of reach. Draco took a step in front of her.
"I am not going anywhere near that man again. If you guys were my so called best friends then why aren't you ever around? Why don't you guys ever call me back? Ever since I got with Lucas you have all put me last. Pushed me out and just figured I will be there if you needed me. It was like that in school to. I was just the go to person if you needed help with homework or studying. Its true also he has been beaten me. In fact its been going on for a long time. I was just healing the cuts, bruises and broken bones myself until yesterday. I couldn't heal the damage he did. I am so glad that you can believe me. Some friends you guys are." Hermione yelled.
Draco was stunned but proud of her. She was starting to stick up for herself. She was finally not putting up with these idiots anymore.
Ron and Harry stood there speechless.
"Well since you guys seem to be speechless which is not surprising Draco and I are leaving. I already got all of my stuff from Lucas's apartment. I left him for good. Don't bother trying to contact me because I have had enough with all of you pushing me around and only coming to me when you need something." Hermione said.
Hermione grabbed Draco's hand a started walking away. She could hear Ron and Harry yelling her name asking her to come back that they needed to talk this over and find out the truth.
Hermione just kept walking. She wanted nothing more then to cry but she wouldn't, not in front of Draco.
"You ok?" Draco asked.
"No but it had to be done. I will eventually be ok but its going to take a long time." Hermione muttered.
"How about I take you home so that you can unpack and while you do that why don't I go get some take out for us for dinner?" Draco asked.
"I think that it would be best if I just spend some time alone. I really appreciate everything you have done for me Draco, really. You are the only one that seems to be on my side at the moment. Thank you so much." Hermione said.
When they got to her cottage and he unloaded all her bags he did something that was un-Malfoy like. He hugged her. Even more surprising is that she didn't pull away, in fact she embraced him. When he pulled away he noticed the tears ok her cheek.
"Well, have a nice night unpacking. Don't worry about coming in early tomorrow because I wont be in the office until around noon so sleep in, relax for a little while tomorrow." Draco told her.
"Ok thank you. I will see you tomorrow afternoon." Hermione said.
"Night Hermione." Draco said.
"Night Draco." Hermione said.