Attention Everyone! I don't own Happy Noodle Boy, any other characters used
in this story or Blow Pops. But I wish I did. *sniff*
Insanity, Take 4
Q: Dear Happy Noodle Boy,
Will you marry me?
-Person with no life
A: What's that on your head? WAIT, WAIT DON'T SPILL HOT COCOA ON MY ARMS!! I FOUND IT! IT'S A SWIMMING POOL!!! YES IT IS!! I CAN STING IT IN MY SPLEEN, THRASHING AROUND LIKE A BADLY DRAWN HAMSTER ON A CAFFENEINE MIDDLE!! THE WORMS CRAWL IN, THE SNAILS SLIDE OUT AND FIND A RINGWORM IN YOUR NOSEHOLE IN WHICH THEY CAN DIE HAPPILY EVER SQUIGGLY IN A TOADSTOOL!!
-Shit I have blood in my pants, Happy Noodle Boy
Q: Why DID the chicken cross the road?
-Noodletwin
A:TWO PLUS TWO EQUALS NEGATIVE FOURTEEN DAMNIT!!! AND I DON'T CARE WHAT THAT FROOT LOOP THINKS ABOUT MY PINK DRESS AND PANTYHOSE!! IT'S NOT LIKE HE CAN JUMP OFF A CLIFF AND NOT BREAK A FOLLICLE!! TELL HIM TO SHOVE IT UP HIS EYEBALL AND SEE HOW IT SQUIRMS LIKE RABID KIWIS AND MURDEROUS ORANGES WITH CHAINSAWS AND SCREECHING WEASELS!!
-Purple is cool, Happy Noodle Boy
Q: Dear HNB,
Have you ever considered having a talk show? You could beat that big chinned fool Jay Leno and that Irish (no offense to anyone from Ireland) pansy Conan hands down!
Sincerely,
Dib
A: THE ONLY WAY YOU'LL EVER FIND ME IN DA CLUB IS IF MY HANDS ARE TIED IN AN AWKWARD POSITION IN A MUD BATH FULL OF GREEN PIGGIES WITH ORANGE CHICKENS FLYING OVER THE MOON AFTER MURDERING THE COWS AND TAKING OVER MARS AND PLUTO WITH WATER GUNS AND THROWING SPACE ROCKS AT THE VACUUM THAT IS THE SHOE OF SHITNEY SPEARS AND JUMP ON JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE'S EARDRUMS WITH TOOTHPICKS IN HEAD AND THE MOON IS IN THE 112TH HOUSE OF POOINESS!!
-Don't read the lemons, Happy Noodle Boy
Insanity, Take 4
Q: Dear Happy Noodle Boy,
Will you marry me?
-Person with no life
A: What's that on your head? WAIT, WAIT DON'T SPILL HOT COCOA ON MY ARMS!! I FOUND IT! IT'S A SWIMMING POOL!!! YES IT IS!! I CAN STING IT IN MY SPLEEN, THRASHING AROUND LIKE A BADLY DRAWN HAMSTER ON A CAFFENEINE MIDDLE!! THE WORMS CRAWL IN, THE SNAILS SLIDE OUT AND FIND A RINGWORM IN YOUR NOSEHOLE IN WHICH THEY CAN DIE HAPPILY EVER SQUIGGLY IN A TOADSTOOL!!
-Shit I have blood in my pants, Happy Noodle Boy
Q: Why DID the chicken cross the road?
-Noodletwin
A:TWO PLUS TWO EQUALS NEGATIVE FOURTEEN DAMNIT!!! AND I DON'T CARE WHAT THAT FROOT LOOP THINKS ABOUT MY PINK DRESS AND PANTYHOSE!! IT'S NOT LIKE HE CAN JUMP OFF A CLIFF AND NOT BREAK A FOLLICLE!! TELL HIM TO SHOVE IT UP HIS EYEBALL AND SEE HOW IT SQUIRMS LIKE RABID KIWIS AND MURDEROUS ORANGES WITH CHAINSAWS AND SCREECHING WEASELS!!
-Purple is cool, Happy Noodle Boy
Q: Dear HNB,
Have you ever considered having a talk show? You could beat that big chinned fool Jay Leno and that Irish (no offense to anyone from Ireland) pansy Conan hands down!
Sincerely,
Dib
A: THE ONLY WAY YOU'LL EVER FIND ME IN DA CLUB IS IF MY HANDS ARE TIED IN AN AWKWARD POSITION IN A MUD BATH FULL OF GREEN PIGGIES WITH ORANGE CHICKENS FLYING OVER THE MOON AFTER MURDERING THE COWS AND TAKING OVER MARS AND PLUTO WITH WATER GUNS AND THROWING SPACE ROCKS AT THE VACUUM THAT IS THE SHOE OF SHITNEY SPEARS AND JUMP ON JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE'S EARDRUMS WITH TOOTHPICKS IN HEAD AND THE MOON IS IN THE 112TH HOUSE OF POOINESS!!
-Don't read the lemons, Happy Noodle Boy