AN: This is the fourth time I've had to write this chapter because FFN doc manager seems to keep corrupting or losing the save. Anyway, I hope you have a good day and you enjoy the chapter.
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The Resistance base typically exuded noise. But tonight it was cold, distant and quiet. A diplomatic mission called most of the higher ups along with a great number of their pilots and personnel, in an effort to show the Resistance was alive and well. Even if that was the most of their numbers, it would still send a message of stability. At least that's what General Organa had claimed.
Rey had been left behind and that didn't sit well with her. It felt too close to how she felt as a child - abandoned, alone in the sand again. Yes, it made sense for her to stay behind. Afterall the last time a Force user has been on Bespin, it hadn't gone well for the planet. She would distract from the talks. Logically she knew this, but as she walked the quiet halls that logic did nothing to keep those fears at bay. It was late and she couldn't sleep, and so she wandered.
With the whispers of her fears edging at her mind she had tried to find her in-between place, to no avail. But in her walk, she felt the world fade and shift, those telltale signs of the Bond forming -but no sign of her dark companion. She found herself rounding a corner only to find him standing impassively in the middle of the hallway. Something in his stance gave her pause, watching him for a moment she noticed the fear rolling off him causing her own heart to quicken in response. It was so small, but she could still feel his thought urging her to remain silent, to wait. While Kylo Ren had perfected the art of hiding his emotions behind a steel wall Rey was more free with her emotions. As such her own fear, frustration and worry all but shouted at him calling him to respond. But for now, he stood stoically with cold calculating eyes staring at something she could not see.
Waiting made mere moments drag on and on, but finally, the silence broke. "Agreed. Move forward with our plans. I expect consistent reports." If his words didn't convey his meaning then surely his voice and demeanor hammered it home, whoever he was speaking to was dismissed. More waiting until his demeanor changed, and his wall inched down.
"What just happened?" Rey asked quietly, wondering what caused the fear that he held. Thankfully her voice was steady even if she didn't feel so steady.
The young man's heart was racing along with his thoughts as he considered how badly the past few moments could have gone. His eyes snapped to the girl in front of him, no longer cold but burning with a quiet rage. "You just stumbled into something you should not have," he growled out at her, not intending to be as rough as he was being.
Irritation bubbled in her as he snapped at her. Feeling a deep shame over the worry she had felt only moments before. Her own face tensed "You know I don't have control over this. Just like you." She hissed at him.
The two stood watching the other, tense and irritated. But Rey was done waiting and she acted first by straightening her own posture and purposefully walking right past him.
He watched as her smaller frame passed him and just kept going. He took a few steps towards her still angry and not ready to stop the tirade in his mind. "Where are you going?" He sneered at her.
Once she was a short distance from him she turned her head to glare at him for a long moment before walking away. Saying nothing. Using their growing distance and her sheer will she shut the connection and the Bond went silent. When the world stopped feeling like a haze Rey broke into a run. Only stopping when she found herself outside.
Watching her walk away from him was more painful then he cared to admit. He needed solitude before he could do anything. As soon as he found the solitude he craved he tried to reach out to her, to reconnect. All in vain. He let out a frustrated grunt and looked at his surroundings, he was alone and it was quiet. He considered using what she had taught him only a few days before. He was still unable to access the "in-between" as she called it but it had helped before. Kylo Ren dismissed it quickly as doing so only reminded him of a certain scavenger. No, instead he returned to a tried and true method - training.
Anxious and angry energy danced across her arms and legs, urging Rey to action. Collecting her staff she found herself letting the angry flow from her hits against the defenseless tree she had found. The two of them letting their emotions flow out in their blows, and occasionally imagining the other on the receiving end of their blows. While that helped some - as it had in the past - there was a sadness that seeped into the space their anger had left behind.
Panting Rey ceased her blows, that anxious and angry energy finally gone. And while she thought she would feel better without it she found she felt worse. A pervasive shame and sadness clung to her now. She found herself wanting to see him, to scream at him to feel his strange form of comfort. To distract herself she threw herself into running basic tune-ups on the ships around her, there was something soothing about working with the machines.
His training exercises had helped some and gave Kylo Ren the clearer mind he was searching for. Resting from the exertion he pushed back his hair back from his face as he stared at the ground. His thoughts drifted back to Rey as he reviewed their little spat. Watching her walk away from him produced too many thoughts he didn't want to revisit. But even without those thoughts, he could feel the coldness of hurt seep into his bones. The young man was more focused on this feeling, so much that before he knew it they were connected again.
He felt her presence in front of him and he quickly lifted his head to confirm. There she stood, on a box while stretching her arms up clearly focused on whatever task she was doing. Rising from his seated position he scrutinized her features. She was covered in sweat, just as he was. But she had marks of oil and machine grime across her arms, her face and her hands were covered in it. He knew that she enjoyed machines and working on them but she wasn't happy. Her face was scrunched in a scowl as she pulled out a piece and replaced it but in the act, her eyes flickered over to him before quickly returning to the task before her.
Kylo Ren felt his jaw clench as he realized she wasn't distracted, she knew he was there and she was ignoring him. This was too many steps back from where they came and the young man was not willing to go back to those cold days. He would drag her back to where they were before - kicking and screaming if need be. His arms crossed as he stalked towards her.
"Hello." He tried to begin a conversation cordially but she stayed steadfast in her plan to ignore him. Anger rippled through the Bond from both of them. Anger was something he could deal with, something he excelled in. As he stalked closer he pressed on. "Apparently you've lost your voice. Am I that intimidating?" He baited and was rewarded for it by a deepening of her frown and annoyance peppering the air around her.
As she continued her silence Kylo Ren took to circling her with his hands neatly clasped behind his back, all pride and perfect posture. "A vow of silence perhaps?" His question remained unanswered as he knew it would. But her continued silence told him that he'd have to up his game if he hoped for results. "Is the little scavenger running away?" The assault on her pride, however, gave him the reaction he had been hoping for, a flare of anger.
Without much thought, Kylo Ren tilted his head out of the trajectory of the wrench she had thrown at him - missing it's intended target. He halted in his movements "Ah, there you are I thought you left me." She was panting in her rage, but at least she wasn't ignoring him - and didn't have a blaster.
Carefully he drew closer to her. "Scavenger isn't something to be ashamed of." He said softly to her, trying to offer some sort of pseudo-apology. Still, his attention was focused on the pain in her eyes and the tension her body held. "Rey..." Her name tumbled from his lips almost pleading. But he halted as she stepped back "Don't walk away." The words rushing out of him, as his hand rose to meet his plea.
"Why?" She sneered but still, she stopped in her retreat, as she looked from his hand to his eyes.
Slowly he returned his outstretched hand to his side. Kylo Ren nervously wet his lips as he searched for the words, he worried that the wrong choice would end with watching her walk away again. He didn't want that so he went with a truth he had been trying to hide from even himself. "Because I want to talk to you." Yes, she was an enigma and he should be trying to turn her to the Dark Side - but the simple truth was that he enjoyed their talks. And after so long hiding this from himself it was now open before them.
Rey wasn't sure what to do with such blatant honesty from him, his frankness always seemed to disarm her. But still he had hurt her and it needed to be said. "You know we have no control over this." She snapped reciting her previous defense.
Instead of hard dark eyes and a terse voice this time those words were met with a soft gaze and a deep soft voice "I know." His regret tinged the space between as it offered his wordless apology. "I hurt you," he said softly admitting his fault. "I don't want to do that." There it was the truth of it, he hated to see her in pain and it only doubled when he felt he had caused that pain.
The tension still clung to her shoulders but less so than before as she nodded "I know." She offered and let out a sigh. Being angry at him helped to give her a distraction, and a direction. Otherwise fear felt as though it would paralyze her.
Kylo Ren carefully stepped forward as he tasted the fear in the air "Something else is troubling you." His gaze intent on her, wanting to find the source of her pain. He could lie to himself claiming it would be to teach her to use the pain for power. But honestly, he only wanted to root out the source of her pain and tear it apart. "Tell me." He urged softly.
The grease covered woman looked at her hands and busied herself with trying to clean the grease with a rag. "It's nothing," she muttered dismissively. A black-clad hand reached out and stole the rag from her hands, her frown returned and her gaze flew back to his own eyes ready to show her displeasure.
But Kylo Ren would not be phased by her obvious displeasure as his free hand gently tilted her face to the side and began diligently cleaning the grease he found on her cheek with her rag. "Tell me." He urged again but did not meet her eyes as he focused on his self-appointed task.
Out of the corner of her eye, she watched his face, intense as ever. But a softness clung there, one she was becoming accustomed to. "They left." She whispered and it seemed to halt his movements before she continued "My friends, they left." She hated how terrified she sounded, so she rushed in with an equally unsure voice "They'll come back." Trying to quell the panic bubbling in her mind
At her quiet confession, he drew back and released his gentle hold on her chin to look into her eyes. There he could almost feel that fateful day in the desert, he swore he could almost hear her desperate cries and screams across time. "Still, you can't help but think of your parents." He spoke softly as he found the source of her pain.
As her panic grew her eyes widened and her panicked voice pressed on "But what if they don't want me anymore?" The panic grew into a tornado in her mind "My own parents didn't want me, why would anyone?" It felt like she couldn't catch a breath as her thoughts raced never giving her a moment's peace.
Kylo Ren was a powerful man, and yet watching Rey crumble before him he felt so powerless. Words would do nothing, the tornado would only whisk them away and fall on deaf ears. Still, he refused to be powerless and so he dropped her rag and quickly used his long arms to encircle her in a tight embrace binding her to him. Small calloused hands clutched to him as he offered a quiet anchor for her to cling to.
It pained him to see her this way if only she could let go of that horrible truth she could free herself. But he had no idea on how to help her do that and so he stayed holding her close hoping that it would help somehow. As the tornado raged they continued holding onto one another, until finally, it lessened to a strong gust of wind. The wind gratefully took the fear and tension with it, and thankfully a pleasant warmth took up their place instead.
Slowly her breathing returned to normal and they relaxed their hold on each other. Rey pulled back and met his gaze gratitude pulsing at him in soft waves. As they seemed to remember themselves they withdrew their arms and let them hang at their sides.
The young woman nodded "They'll come back." Her voice holding more steel in it than it had only moments before.
"Yes, they will." He agreed in his deep baritone, sure that her precious rebels would never abandon her.
She nodded feeling much more certain before continuing "And I have you." She said this softly, happy to be able, to be honest about this truth she felt between them.
Kylo Ren tried to hold back the warm feeling that Rey seemed to evoke, but alas he failed as the warmth spread through his bones. He offered a single nod to her statement and was rewarded with a small smile. He tore his eyes from her features before looking down to the rag and bent to collect it before returning it to her.
Easily she took the rag and nodded to him. Her dark partner, on the other hand, needed a distraction, thinking too much on that warmth was not something he felt ready for just yet. And so he offered them a distraction. "What were you working on?" He asked curiously as to the mechanics he tinkered with.
Rey perked up at that question and grateful for the distraction flew into talking about engines, and mechanics. The two continued talking about this until they faded from each other's sight. Yet still, a warmth clung to their bones as proof that they weren't alone.