I kept thinking the cops were after us already, I kept looking back over my shoulder. Maybe they didn't know yet. If we could just get to Dallas before the cops got to us, then maybe we'd be okay. I was pretty worried about this whole thing, but I was keeping cool. Ponyboy, though, he wasn't exactly keeping cool.
He'd never been to Buck's place, I knew that. Darry and Soda wouldn't let him near the guy. I had no rules like that. I had no one who gave a shit, really. Not anyone who could tell me what to do like that, so I'd been to Buck's before with Dally.
I could hear the music like a mile away from the place and it was awful. Hank Williams shit. And I could hear all the drunk people, and I just hoped Dal wasn't drunk, or at least that he wasn't too drunk to help us.
We finally got through Buck to Dally, and he showed up at the door looking half asleep instead of drunk. I was kinda worried that he'd be mad at me cause I told him to leave those girls alone. I'd really never told him anything like that before. I knew he wouldn't hit me, not like he would the others. But it wasn't that. Usually I didn't, I didn't want to tell him what to do. There wasn't a need to. It was just, the way he was talking to those girls, it was making my skin crawl. So I had to tell him to cut it out whether he got all pissed off at me or not.
"What do you kids need me for?" he said, and I felt like I didn't even want to drag him into it. It was bad enough Ponyboy was all involved. But there was no choice. I had no choice.
"Johnny killed a soc," Pony blurted out, and I sucked in my breath when he said it. I looked at Pony. He was crying, his face all scrunched up, and I realized he was only about 13. Jesus, he was practically a little kid. What was I doing?
"What?" Dally said, and looked at me real funny. It was like he couldn't believe it, but it was more than that, it was this worried look. He looked real worried, like he would cry, too. But that look was there for just a second, and if I hadn't been looking right at him I would have missed it. I felt funny, kind of. Then the look went away and his usual bored, tough look was in its place.
"Good for you," he said, and then he grabbed Pony by his dripping wet sweat shirt and dragged him inside, and he motioned for me to follow them. I followed Dally up the stairs to the rooms that were up there, it's where he usually stayed, I knew that. But Ponyboy didn't and he started to go into the other room with all the loud music and the drunks, and Dally had to grab him again and pull him toward the stairs.
We were up in his room and he looked at Pony all disgusted, but also kind of how Darry looks at him.
"Ponyboy, are you wet? Jesus, running away in just a sweatshirt, and a soaking wet one at that? At least Johnny has his jean jacket. Don't you ever use your head? Wait here," he said, and left. I sat on the window sill wishing like crazy for a cigarette. Pony was sitting on the bed, wrapped in the moth eaten towel Dally had thrown at him before he left. He was shivering and crying and I could barely look at him. It was hard to keep it in my head that maybe I'd saved him from getting drowned in the fountain. All I could think of was that I killed that kid. I killed him and he was lying at the park dead.
Dally came back with a clean dry shirt for Pony that was way too big, but he put it on and buttoned it up, still sniffling. I watched them, watched Dally shake his head at Pony. Dally thought Ponyboy was so young, like just a kid. Just Soda and Darry's younger brother. I thought he was kind of young, too, but he was my buddy. He was in the same grade as me, which was kind of awful because I was three years older than he was. But I knew that he was real smart in this weird way. It was like he always thought of stuff, thought of what it meant and stuff like that. But he fell apart when shit like this happened, like that time he got jumped. That was just like two days ago, but those guys didn't even really do anything to him.
Dally gave him his leather jacket, too. I was biting my nails sitting on the window sill. I felt so nervous, like I couldn't keep still. It was getting all mixed up in my head. I kept seeing that dead kid, the way his body was sprawled out on the cement at the park, the way the blood was spreading around him. I kept thinking about the cops, and what they'd do to me and Pony if they caught us. I shuddered, got up, paced around the room.
"Here," Dally said to me, handing me a roll of money which I stuffed into my jeans' pocket, then he handed me a gun. I watched Dally light a cigarette, then he grabbed the collar of my jacket and pulled me toward him.
"Listen," he started, but I felt like I could barely focus, I could barely listen. Every time I closed my eyes I saw that dead kid at the park.