Notes: Hi. I dunno if any one is still reading this stuff, but I'd like to start posting it again more regularly. I have a whole bunch of it just sitting on my harddrive. Hope you'll take the time to read and review. Thanks!

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He was not allowed to participate in any of the festivities.

Kuroda-san made a big thing out of his eldest son's marriage, because Kuroda-san, Naotoki had realized, liked to make a big thing out of everything. Having met the older man, Jirou's past arrogance and self-importance were suddenly crystal clear and Naotoki didn't wonder any more why his sensei had been so egotistical when they met. Jirou, however, had calmed down as he aged and matured. His father was still the same as he probably always had been and Naotoki wondered how he had lived so long with these delusions of importance.

Because it was such an important moment for the family and everything was supposed to be just so, Naotoki had been excluded from the ceremony and the feast. Kuroda-san had flat out told Jirou that his student was not to be present, lest Rin-san's family decide against the marriage at the sight of an unholy demon in the house. What kind of family would they look like, after all, if the Hakujou family believed they were allied with demons?

Naotoki did not argue, as he had no desire to be there. The thought of Jirou marrying that shrew made his heart clench; he wanted no part in "wishing the couple well."

It wasn't fair. Rin didn't deserve Jirou. She wouldn't take care of him the way Naotoki did. She could not tend to his battle wounds properly or know which herbs to combine when he was feeling ill. She did not know how to work the wooden comb through his tangled curls without pulling. She did not know how to pack his things for travel, how he liked his bed made up or how to properly launder his clothes. Naotoki knew all of those things, and more. He had learned over the past two years and learned well.

Perhaps she would learn in time as well, but Rin did not seem all that interested in doing things for Jirou.

Naotoki sat on the porch, sulking and watching the fireflies as Jirou and Rin's families had a celebratory dinner. He had been in the same spot all day, alternating between staring off into the vast expanse of nature and sprawled, looking up at the ceiling. He hated being cast aside like this; brushed off as inhuman and frightening, when all he wished for was to be acknowledged as a decent person. Jirou had treated him well, but it was fast becoming apparent that he was to be forgotten in the midst of his sensei's new life.

He wasn't afraid of Jirou's father, per se, but he had experienced enough hell to know that the authority of others was not something to be taken lightly. Jirou's father could put him out of the house, if he so desired. He could kill him. It was best to take it all quietly and hope that Jirou would come around someday.

Fireflies flickered through the descending darkness, dancing and swirling through the air. Naotoki watched lazily as they flitted around, wishing absently that he could become one, with a short lifespan and nothing to do but live briefly and die. It would be so much better than the hell of a long life.

He knew he had to stay out of sight, but he couldn't help peering around the corner, watching the arrival of Rin's family, all so much like her. So much like Jirou's family. They were pretending to be something they were not, the lot of them; drawing the day out with more flare and fanfare than Naotoki had ever seen in his life, even in his time at the castle.

Naotoki knew it was all over with the toast, for that was when the bride and groom drank from each other's cups and the elder presiding over the affair would give his blessing.

A congratulatory cheer from Jirougorou's brothers drifted across the twilight and Naotoki knew it was the beginning of the end.