I am not a Ninja!
Chapter 3
isdh
Sasuke glared at the old man with such hate. "What do you know of my clan?"
"Too much and too little, I am afraid. I do know there are a few unclaimed members of your clan out there. When you attain the rank of chunin, I will take you and the gaki out and help you find them."
Sasuke grunted, glaring at both Tanuki and Naruto.
"Now, Boys. I am going to eat some ramen, and you two welcome to join me." He turned and climbed on the stool in the center of the booth. Naruto was a step behind him.
Sasuke grunted again, spit in the dirt, and with his hands in his pockets, walked off.
When Naruto finished his third bowel of noodles and drained the broth, Tanuki slapped a wad of ryo on the table. "That is enough for now. We need to get you cleaned up and dressed for your Ninja Profile Photo. Then a quick meeting with the Hokage, and then we can see what other trouble you can get into."
Naruto pouted, but followed the old man into crowding market street.
Naruto stood with his hands in the pockets of a leather duster coat. A leather vest over a black ninja mesh shirt, showed off his (for a twelve year old,) muscled chest. A shiny silver face guard (like Yamato wears, only shinier) held his unruly hair back and declared his affiliation to Konohagakure. The cuffs of his camo cargo pants were tucked into his ninja sandles...
Oh yes, everything was orange; the duster, the vest, the camo cargos, the sandles, the head band of his face guard/hitai-ate. It was so bright, Tanuki had to pull a staff from a seal on his back. A surge of chakra and a massive Umbrella snapped open, and cast a shadow over the eyesore of a ninja. The photographer quickly snapped the picture, and sent the two of them on their way.
The Hokage blinked the tears from his eyes, "Are you sure you want this to be your picture?"
"Yes, Hokage-Jiji." the newly minted genin answered.
"You know that ninja are to be 'shadow warriors' and to be able hide in the shadows of the 'Noon Sun'?"
"I have proven my skill at stealth, and from the 'Noon Sun' and its shadows; I strike at the Hokages weekly." the boy boosted, his chest puffed.
Iruka snorted, and nodded. "He has you there, Sir."
Before the Hokage could respond, a blur attacked from the doorway. Three steps in, it tripped, reveling a boy about the age of six in a scarf too long for him, a helmet, and clutching a wooden shuriken in his grubby paw. Looking about as he climbed to his feet, he spotted Naruto just standing there.
"You! You tripped me!" he shouted. "I will get you for this!" trying to stretch his three feet of height so he could yell in Naruto's face.
Naruto snorted, "Baka, you tripped over your own feet. I did not have to do anything." He gripped the boy by the front of his shirt and lifted him from the floor, with one arm. "You are below my notice."
"Go on, hit me, I dare you." Konohamaru smirked 'He won't. No one will. I am the "Honorable Grandson". No one hits me!'
Naruto bops the kid on his helmeted head, then drops him, just as a jonin in colored glasses entered the room. "Ah there you are, Honorable Grandson. You! In the Orange! Away from the Honorable Grandson!" Seeing the Orange Jinchuuriki so near his charge, the jonin puffed up. "Honorable Grandson, come away from that..."
Naruto cast a look at the Hokage and Tanuki, both waved in a dismissal, snorted, "Whatever." and walked from the room.
"Now Honorable Grandson," Ebisu took on the instructing pose, "It does no good to hang about with trash like that... Where did Honorable Grandson go?"
"Most likely, after Naruto-kun." Tanuki and the Hokage coursed
Everyone left in the room chuckled as the jonin bolted from the room.
Naruto had made it to the street before he noticed that he had nothing to do for the rest of the day. He knew that tomorrow he had to return to the classroom at the academy to receive team assignments. He had left his 'new toys' with Uncle Tanuki, so he could not practice with them. And after the almost perfect exit, he could go back.
"Do you know who I am?" a squeaky voice demanded from behind him. No, not just any squeaky voice, but 'his' squeaky voice.
As many responses flashed through his mind he grinned to himself. "No." he kept his back to the boy. "Nor do I care."
"I am Sarutobi Konohamaru! Honored Grandson of the Third Hokage. You will pay me the respect of I am owed."
"I Thought I did." Naruto grinned as he turned too look at the boy. "Why were you Attacking the old man anyways?"
"I am tired of everyone calling me 'Honorable Grandson'."
Naruto snorted and popped the kid on the head again. "Baka, you can not be tire of the people calling you by your title, and then demand to be respected for that same title." he then glared up at the Hokage's office, as an evil grin crept over his face. "You trying to beat the Hokage? I know a jutsu that can cripple him. He even called it a forbidden jutsu. Want to learn it?"
the look in the gaki's eyes was all he needed to know.
Up in the Hokage's office, Tanuki was watching the two boys as they ran off into the woods. "Oh no, I think We are in trouble." Turning to the Hokage, "Does Naruto know more then one forbidden jutsu?"
the Hokage frowned. "No, just the Shadow clone jutsu..." Then old man's eyes widened, "On no, I told him that one of his prank jutsu was to be labeled a forbidden jutsu. His 'Sexy jutsu'."
"Sexy Jutsu?" Tanuki looked out over the Village. "Do I want to know?"
Iruka spoke up, "Naruto was having trouble with a simple henge, so one Friday evening he went deep into the woods, to train, and two days later he returns with a swagger. That Monday, before the Hokage and a group of elder men, he was called up, put through his paces, and then asked to do his henge." Iruka then snorted in amusement. "None of the elders stood a chance. There was blood everywhere. Three Kunoichi trainees, civilian born, bolted thinking that Naruto killed the elders. Two of the current guardian twelve dropped by to see what was wrong. Only because I was focused on the elders, not on Naruto, was I spared. The Hokage had a stroke, thrashing around on the floor."
"Oh?" the old trader turned from the window. "What was his Henge?"
"A naked blonde female, aged about sixteen years. Twin tails, fuzzy clouds, his whisker marks and a grin was all she was wearing. She even jiggled when she giggled."
Tanuki nodded. "What happened to the elders?"
The Hokage grinned, "The Village got a thirty-eight percent increase in funds to keep that day out of court gossip, and to label that Jutsu forbidden." then he frowned, "Why do you ask?"
"Naruto just offered to teach a forbidden jutsu to your grandson, and grinned evilly, before leading the boy into the woods."
The Hokage and Iruka paled.
As the sun set over the Hokage summit...
"Hinata, Come to my study. Please." Hyūga Hiashi strolled past, his stride never breaking.
Like the well trained girl that she is, she hurried to follow his great strides. Once the two of them were in his study, he closed the door and activated privacy seals.
"Daughter, It has been noticed that you have shown some interest in the Uzumaki boy." His tone was neutral, not giving anything away. "Can you tell me what your interest is?"
She swallowed. "He has shown great inner strength. He has no one and yet he is last only in book work in the class. His Taijutsu is sloppy, but he is near undefeated in sparing, only the teachers can beat him, and only when they go all out." She blinked, and looked away from her father. "The villagers hate him, and for no reason that we can figure out, but he holds no hatred for anyone in the Village. He trains himself into the ground, learning the few skills that the instructors actually teach him. He takes great joy in teasing and pranking those who get above themselves, and can out run most of the ANBU within the Village."
"And he seems to lend his inner strength to those close to him." his voice warmed. "Since I asked you about him, you have not stuttered, or stammered once. I have an option that you might find of interest; the elders and I have found that it would strengthen our Standing in the Village, in due time, to have the Uzumaki boy chained, if not bound in some other way, to the Hyūga clan. I as Head of the Clan offer you the chance to bind the boy to us. It comes at a cost, not taken lightly. It would cost you the position of Heir, but remove you from the 'caged bird' seal. Failure is not an option, he must be tied to us before the next chunin exams."
"T-t-tied to us how?" her stutter crept into her voice.
"Buy more then rumor, my child. But other then that it is up to you." Hiashi pulled a scroll from his sleeve. "This scroll is signed by his birth mother, and yours. In his clan the Female is dominant. Tomorrow when you go to watch him train, you must begin your..." he grinned evilly, "I believe your mother called it 'assault' but she also referred to it 'hunting', 'taming', and 'breaking'. I do believe you have a Inuzuka in your class, use them to talk to a female of the clan about 'bringing a male to heel'. Use that phrase; 'Bringing a male to heel'. It worked for your mother, it worked for Uzumaki's mother, and it should work for you."
"If it worked for M-m-mother, why can you not tell me?" She flushed cutely.
"One, i do not remember. Two, if I told you, you would not learn your half of the training." he looked away and muttered under his breath, but she heard it anyway, "third, it would scare you to hear what your mother did to me, when I was courting her." He shook his head and cleared his throat. "As I look back on our courtship, I hunted and pursued her, right into her trap. There were things that I did to catch her eye, that make the pranks of your Male look mild. Then there are the things that she did to reward me and to punish me as only woman in love can do. You reach phase one, and I will give you her journal of her 'hunt' of me." A surge of chakra broke the seals, "Dismissed."
She fled, the scroll still in her hand, still unopened.
Tsume had just finished double checking the Compound and Kennel before turning in, when there was a frantic pounding on the door. She picked her way there, and opened it to find a panting Hyuga Hinata leaning on the door frame.
"Gomen-sai. Inuzuka-sama, I am in a position of great honor and urgentanticy. I was told to seek out you or one of your female clansmen, and request training in, and I quote, 'Bringing a male to heel',"
Tsume's head snapped up as did that of her nin-ken who was lounging at the foot of the stairs. Then She spotted the scroll in the girl's hand. "Follow me." As the girl entered, she bolted the great door. She guided the girl to her room at the top of the stairs. Once inside she sealed the door. "So you want personal training in clan secrets, and from your tone the male is not of my clan."
"No, but his mother and mine took this training. To bring the male of my choice to heel..." the girl blushed.
"May see your scroll?"
It was passed over, Tsume read it twice. "I see." She sighed, "My son will be disappointed, but I trained with these two, in fact my mother was the instructor for their training." She looked the girl in the eye, "I can tell you there are three levels of training. Loving puppy, nin-ken, and devoted slave. Pick which class you want."
Hinata closed her eyes in thought. She nodded, and looked Tsume in the eye. "I want Devoted Slave, but that means I would have to break him completely, and that would strip what I desire the most from him."
" Can we do a blend of nin ken and loving puppy?"