Chapter 4, here we go! Warning, the intro song lyrics has just a little bit of coarse language but it was just too perfect for this chapter. Because this is how Diana sees Loki at this point.

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Chapter 4 - Loki the Tutor

You're a beautiful
A beautiful fucked up man
You're setting up your
Razor wire shrine

'Cause you're working
Building a mystery
Holding on and holding it in
Yeah you're working
Building a mystery

-Sarah McLachlan: Building a Mystery

...

"Help your daughter?" Loki echoed the words of Mr. Knowles.
"Yes. I know this is an odd thing to even suggest. But having observed you these years and being aware of your talents, this idea came to my mind and I wished to propose it."

Loki was at Mr. Knowles' office, sitting in the chair by his desk. From the tall window opposite him, he could see the sky and the distant landscape. It was early spring. He leaned back in his chair and lifted his index finger to his lips. This was the creature that had nearly run over him. What if she was this annoying always?

"And what was it that she wishes to pursue?"
"The Classics."
"I see.
Loki was pondering.
"Well, the subject is right up my alley. We can try this arrangement, but I cannot promise it will work out."
"Of course. But I am grateful that you will try. The study sessions could happen at the library here."
Loki nodded.
"And as I told you, I will naturally compensate your effort. You will have the possibility to order whatever that would make your stay more pleasant here. With certain limitations of course."
"Why of course. I will consider what that could be," Loki replied courteously.

They shook hands and set the time of the first tutoring lesson.

Perhaps there was something to gain from this, Loki thought instinctively. He would be doing a favor to the leader of this miniature realm. And he basically had nothing to lose. Except his time. And he had to face it, he had plenty of it. His days were long and his nights were often even longer. His mind and heart were still trying to understand and process everything that had happened to him, and this occurred often in the form of nightmares...

...

"So I'm going to tutor you, Miss Knowles."
Her father had set them up in the secluded corner of the library that had a large desk. She had her black hair tied to the back. He suspected it was not her natural colour. There was something colourwise strange going on with her hair.

"Yes, I think we established that," Diana said. If she was honest, she had been hurt by her father's suggestion, but promised to try, because she did value his opinion. Nevertheless, she did feel disappointed he didn't think she could manage it alone anymore...And so Diana had been in a foul mood that entire morning. And yes, anxious about meeting Loki Laufeyson again.
"What's in this for you?" she asked sounding annoyed and immediately scoffed herself for being so blunt...Human interaction wasn't perhaps her thing.
Loki shrugged.
"Perhaps I'm in it for the fun," he said surprising Diana by baring his teeth in a wicked smile.

I guess...She could try playing this game.

"You're scary," Diana said exactly what she thought.
"I guess I am, aren't I?" Loki said calmly walking next to the desk, not seeming offended by her comment. More amused actually. He realized he had actually missed interaction with someone new, even if it was her.
"Well, I'm being tutored by a scary person in an asylum, lucky me," Diana said almost to herself. And this time she was embarrassed that she had sounded so...adolescent.
"A very intelligent scary person, I might add," Loki said a bit absent-mindedly browsing the books on the table. These were the works they were going to delve into.
"Not to mention modest," Diana muttered under her breath.

Not again. She felt she couldn't control her mouth with this person.

"I heard that you little brat," Loki said grinning.

Yes, they had definitely started off with the right foot.

"I thought you Midgardians have schools. Why aren't you in one of them?"
His sudden question startled Diana, but she tried not to show it.
"Why do you care?"
"Well, I'm your tutor. I feel I should know why I am your tutor."

Just spit it out.

"Okay. I hated school and decided not to go there anymore."
"Why did you hate school?"

Why couldn't he shut up already?

"Why did I hate school?"
"Yes. I just asked that."
"I just hated it."
"You really don't wish to discuss this topic, do you?" Loki asked looking at her and tilting his head.
"How did you guess that?" Diana said feigning surprise.
"Fine. And actually I do not care."
"I knew it."
Loki took one of the books, Ulysses, in his hand.
"So answer me this, why do you wish to study the Classics?"

What he had learned of Midgard, the Classics was something adolescents, teenagers or whatever they were called, were not usually interested in.

"I started with fairytales and moved to stronger substances."

Loki raised his eyebrow. She was amusing in her own way. Obviously a bit lost with herself.
Well, what was he to say.

"My turn," Diana began.
Mr. Laufeyson didn't seem that scary to her anymore. Just weird.
"Loki is a strange name. Is it your real one?"
She had honestly thought about this ever since she heard the name.
"Yes, it is my real name."
"Are you Norwegian?"
"I'm not. I am actually from Asgard. But I was originally born on Jotunheim."
He said this in a matter-of-fact tone.

Why bother lying to her.
She thinks I'm mad anyway.

Diana nodded. She knew very well those were imaginary places.
Yep, this was an asylum after all.

...

Despite their slightly awkward start, the study sessions did begin to work out. They were both so focused on the subjects. One day they were in the garden on the side of the main building, having a break. It was a lovely little orchard. Loki was sitting down in the shade of a tree. Diana was sitting on the lawn not that far from him.

"So what's your story?" Diana suddenly asked.
"Now do you really wish to know?" Loki asked with a smirk.
She nodded.

He might as well have a bit of fun.
Perhaps a shock effect?
Well, why not...

Loki leaned on the tree behind him, closing his eyes.
"Well, to begin with, as an infant my real parents abandoned me to die, to freeze to death, on Jotunheim, the realm of the frost giants, jötnar that is...For I was deemed too small."
He could see it took a second for the words to sink in.

Yes, it startled her.
This sad, mad origin.

"But I did not die...Then, my adoptive parents, who happen to be the very king and queen of Asgard, the realm eternal as you might know, lied to me of my true identity till my adulthood."
Loki held a small pause and looked a bit downwards, his long dark lashes hiding his eyes. He felt very detached from everything he had said. And he actually forgot to even look at her reaction...
"So imagine my shock when I found out I wasn't an Aesir like them but a jotun."
He couldn't believe how easily these things had rolled off his tongue. And all this he had said in a deadpan, dead-serious tone.
"So to finish my story short, this revelation among many other things led to the fact that I eventually tried to take over and enslave this realm, Midgard. But I failed so my punishment is to remain here for yet another 118 years."

He knew he had left most parts out, like what happened with Thor, one attempted suicide, the destruction he had caused on Earth, but he still felt it covered quite a lot of ground. Loki stood up and brushed some grass off his dark jeans. Diana stared at him, forgetting to blink. Her expression said more than a thousand words. Looking at her reaction, it sank in. His life had been madness. Even this extremely edited version of it. He actually felt a bit bad now. Diana had to be scared now because she must have actually thought he is completely and utterly insane.

"Why 118 years? It's an odd number," Diana finally asked.
"That is all you can ask?" Loki couldn't help a smile rising on his lips.
She nodded.
"Well, it's because I've already been here two years."
"Right." Diana's mouth worded almost without a sound.
"Right" she said again with more determination and a nod.
She was scribbling something in her notebook.
"We should continue the study session, Lady Diana," Loki said.
He guessed that would normalize things a bit.
"Don't call me that," Diana said and winced.
"Why not? It's a polite way to call a lady where I come from," Loki asked looking slightly confused.
"It just sounds like someone…You surely know. Please just call me just Diana, okay?"
"Certainly," he said and offered her a hand to raise her off the ground not having a clue what she was talking about.
They were walking back to the building when a question occurred to him.
"Can you tell me how old are you, Diana?"
He was very bad at guessing the age of mortals. He was curious in a way.
"I'm seventeen" she said.
"Is that a good age?" He wasn't quite sure why he asked this.
"No"
"Why?"
"It is a strange transitory stage where you are not yet adult but no longer a child."
"I see."

Loki knew that as a part of the spell of concealment none would wonder his age. He would see the mortals age and yet he would not do the same. He was over a thousand years old. He guessed that eventually he would view this exile, which would barely last over a century, just one experience among others, a minor detour in his life. He knew still had at least three thousand years of life ahead of him. If a battle or something else would not end it before that.

Inside they began to draw up a more detailed plan how to get her into the university of her dreams.

...

Loki didn't find Diana entirely hopeless. Her mind was actually quite quick and adept to learn. He noticed she was always wearing black clothes that covered her entire body, even in the summer. This created a stark contrast with her fair skin. Loki thought to himself someone could've thought that they were related. There was that sort of similarity in their appearances. They could've been perhaps cousins. Although he was now sure the colour of her hair was artificial.

"What exactly is a jotun, a frost giant?" Diana asked.
"Excuse me?" Loki was surprised by her sudden question.
"You once said you're not an Aesir but a frost giant."
"Read your Norwegian mythology and you'll find out." Loki answered.
"Anyway, do you write down everything that I say?"
"Are you asking if I have a diary? Yes, I do have. And anyway, I actually did some research on your namesake."
"He is not my namesake. I actually am him." Loki interjected.
That day he just wanted to mess with her.
"Sorry, I forgot" she said deadpan."So I googled you."
"You googled me?" Loki actually knew what that meant but the words just sounded so ridiculous. Midgardians were often ridiculous. Loki shook his head.
"Ah, let me guess...You found the stories. I mean, you jest at a Viking once, maybe twice, and you'll never hear the end of it. They just blow the whole thing out of proportion."
Diana looked at him wide-eyed.
"But I have to give it to your kind, you mortals do have such wild imaginations...But please, just do not believe everything you read. And that's a good advice in general."
"Yes, that actually is," Diana nodded and smiled.

...

"Dad, I know you're not allowed to talk about patients...But could you tell me what's Loki Laufeyson's story?"
"Diana. You are right, I am not allowed to talk about patients. It's a different thing if he tells you himself."
"Okay, the thing is...and don't get me wrong. He's a brilliant tutor, I mean, he knows his stuff. But everyone now and then, like when we have breaks, he says all these crazy things. Like he's actually Loki, from another realm."
"Well, yes, I thought we had discussed that he has this delusion."
"Father, cross my heart and hope to die, I will never tell anyone if you shed some light who he actually is."
"You must understand your request is a serious one. All that information is confidential."
"Alright. I won't pry then," she said defeated.
Her father's expression softened.
"Okay, I can tell a few things on some extremely general level. But you can never let him know you know, you understand?"
Diana was silent for a moment and knitted her brow.
"Actually Dad, forget it. Now that I think about it, I don't want to know. He has to have some sick, sad past to be that messed up…And I don't want to pretend around him. I'll just take him as he is."
"Alright then. I suppose that is a good approach, my dear" Mr. Knowles said giving her kiss on her forehead.
"And if you want to quit the whole tutoring thing, just tell me. Immediately."
"I don't. Good night, Dad."

...

"Diana, this was rubbish." Loki said pressing her essay in a tight ball and throwing it into a trash bin.
"W-what?"
"I know you can write a better one."
She stood there her mouth open.
"This is your method? Haven't you heard? You put the negative feedback between two positive feedbacks and present it as a "feedback sandwich".
While saying the last two words she actually made the quotation marks with her fingers.
"You do not make paper balls out of essays. In fact, you're traumatizing me as we speak."
He just rolled his eyes.
"Rubbish."
The next words he just mouthed without voice.
"You. Can. Do. Better."

Despite all their occasional bantering she thought it was the best summer of her life, her summer with Loki. For some odd reason, his presence repelled her distress. He pushed her forward and she had found new courage. And it was with this new sensation that she thought maybe a change would do her good. She applied to become an exchange student overseas.

Diana had to admit Loki was...awesome. There was no other word for it. And yet, he was not aware of it. She could sense this. There was a thick layer of self-loath there. Diana often thought of that story he had told in that orchard. His story of abandonment, betrayal and failure - although put in imaginative words, reflected his true suffering. He had been hurt badly. And then there was his dry humour. He could be so deadpan. Only the slightest flicker in the corner of his eye - which she imagined he could also control - gave away his true demeanor.

From Loki's point of view, with Diana he could more openly scoff Midgard and their strange manners. Yes, she thought he was crazy but acted like his comments were part of a normal conversation. He had to admit, almost involuntarily, that he had needed some company after all. Some mission. And perhaps helping this Midgardian girl, who apparently loved the colour black, to fulfil her dream could be it.

In these thoughts Loki shook his head. What had happened to him? But she was somehow so harmless, so innocent. He actually wanted to help her.

He had become...so soft.

...

"How do you actually know all these things?" Diana asked.
"Well, I myself received a very good education." Loki stated.

He must've been a son of a high class family, Diana thought. This was of course no surprise, she had always heard it in his voice. It wasn't the most typical accent of aristocracy, but it was that definitely aristocratic. Perhaps his parents weren't British.

"And at heart of my education was building a logical, sound mind. One that could face any mental challenge," Loki said and closed the book he was holding.
"And why might you be snickering?" he asked noticing her reaction to his words.
"It's nothing."
"Tell me. Now," he ordered with such authority she had to comply.
"It was that bit you said about the sound mind. I'm so sorry. Mental hospital humor." she said.
He rolled his eyes.
But a smile tucked the corner of this lip.

It was early August. They had been discussing some poetry at the library of the main house. And later he was trying to teach her to debate. Now he was walking her back to the house. It was a late summer evening, a lovely dusk.

"I wanted to tell you something." Diana began.
"I'm going to leave soon. In four weeks in fact. I'm going to the States, as an exchange student"
"As an exchange student?"
He had no idea what this meant.
"I applied to study there for one year," she said.

Loki actually felt something sunk inside himself when she had declared this. After all, he had spent a lot of time with during the past three months. He had justified this to himself by saying that she was her Midgardian pet. But somewhere deep down inside he knew that he couldn't quite belittle her like that.

"I'll return before next summer. I know you might not be here anymore when I return. I guess you're getting better now."

Loki shrugged.
"You never know."
Although he knew very well.
He was going nowhere.
And somewhere in that thought that they would meet again, he felt...Was it hope?

...

She asked him to visit her the day she was leaving. She had actually asked him to visit her home which he had never done. Loki hesitated since he wasn't sure if her house was inside the limits of his mobility. But for some odd reason, which he didn't even understand himself, he risked it. At the door he had truly dreaded, but luckily the house was within the area he was allowed to enter. He didn't get magically fried.

Diana invited him to sit in the kitchen and poured some tea. They seemed to consume a lot of this hot liquid here in this realm. She had some that contained lemon and bergamot - it was actually his favourite. They had a comfortable chat about what she planned to during her voyage. He actually enjoyed her enthusiasm.

Finally, Loki was departing back to the main house.
"I wish you all the best, Diana."
He was already turning to leave to the door.
"Wait. I wanted to ask you something," he heard Diana's voice.
Loki turned around and looked at her. She seemed a bit anxious. He noted that there was a small piece of paper in her hand. She was fiddling its corner nervously.
"This is the address where I'm staying…" she began and lowered her gaze to the paper.
"I was just wondering if you could drop me a line sometime. I know you don't like computers so I figured this old-fashioned style could suit you."
Loki was slightly surprised by her request. On Asgard he had written quite a lot of letters, many matters of diplomacy were trusted to him because of his eloquence. But now he didn't even remember when he had last written a letter. Somehow this forgotten art form almost called him. So he nodded.
"Indeed, I think it would suit us well," he said.
A very small genuine smile rose to his lips and he took the little piece of paper that she offered to him.
"Great," was all Diana said. But her eyes shot to his and there was an instant gaiety in them. This was apparently of some importance to her.

The breeze of the late summer evening was still warm. Loki unfolded the paper while walking down the lane. With her own unique handwriting, which he found rather pleasing and easy to read, there was an address that was located in New York.

New York.

He was happy she was no longer there to see the darkness that rose in his heart. A feeling of darkness that even reached his face when he read those two words.