Chapter 4

"What is love really?" Katniss spoke aloud, thinking to herself that she sounded like an ingénue from a cheesy television movie.

She'd spent the last thirty minutes vomiting up her thoughts to Dr. Aurelius about Peeta's declaration to her on the previous Saturday evening. She'd been surprised, even thrilled in the moment, but later after they'd parted and she'd retired for the night alone in her own bed, she panicked.

How was she supposed to work alongside Peeta now that he'd told her in was practically in love with her? The critic who lived in her head reminded her that she'd wanted to bed him weeks earlier. How would that action have impacted their work relationship?

But it didn't happen she snidely reminded her inner critic.

Katniss kept to herself on Sunday. The bakery was closed and she refused an invitation from Effie to join her guests for brunch. Instead she hid in her room only coming out to bid Annie, Finnick, and Haymitch a safe trip home.

Effie must have made her peace with Haymitch because the older woman gave him an awkward hug, after kissing Annie and Finnick and promising to call her niece in a few days.

As soon as Effie came back upstairs after escorting her visitors out of the building, she began to complain about "the absolute impossibility of planning a proper wedding on such short notice." Making an excuse, Katniss had retired to the sanctuary of her room to fret some more.

As the work week started up again, it was all she could think about. The information had made her self-conscious around Peeta. She was glad for her scheduled appointment with Dr. Aurelius.

But now the man's eyes drooped. Was she putting her counselor to sleep?

Ever since Katniss had been hired full-time at the bakery, she had been paying the doctor's hefty fee herself, refusing to take Prim's money any longer, even if it meant reducing her visits to every other week. She knew it was unreasonable but with her own money in the mix she expected more of the doctor – he should be telling her exactly how to fix herself instead of expecting her to figure it all out for herself.

She coughed loudly to get his attention.

Dr. Aurelius' eyes opened wide. "Have you ever been in love?" he asked.

She frowned. Of course she'd loved her family. Her sister and her niece came to mind immediately.

"Do you mean in a romantic sense?"

The doctor nodded.

"No, I've never been in love like that."

"Why not?

It was a good question. She would turn thirty next month. Surely she was old enough to have been in love at least once before. The memory of her mother's overwhelming grief after her father's death almost twenty years earlier came to mind. Was that the reason she'd kept every man at a distance?

"I guess I'm scared of getting hurt."

"Then why are you dating someone who, by your own admission, seems to be interested in developing a serious, perhaps even life-long relationship?

Katniss' mouth flew open at the doctor's observation.

Because he's attractive and I lust for him.

But she couldn't say those things out loud. It made her sound both shallow and horny. But then again she was paying Dr. Aurelius to listen to all the ugly parts of her personality, and then keep his mouth shut.

Fortunately, the doctor looked to his watch. "Time's up. We can talk about this at your next visit."

You mean I can talk about it, she thought.

"Sure," she muttered as she got up from the chair.

But as she rode home on the bus that evening, she realized that she was interested in Peeta for far more than his physical appearance. It was his generosity and kindness that had first drawn her in. How he'd offered her a job without even knowing her. Gave her and her niece shelter in a snowstorm. Had breakfast waiting for her every morning. Treated her like a princess by spoiling her, unlike any other man she'd ever met other than her late father. His friendly nature and sense of humor made her want to be around him. She'd never met anyone like him.

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The next day she wiped down the tables in the bakery's small dining area and fretted. She didn't deserve Peeta. Something was bound to go wrong.

By now one of those waitresses had probably told Peeta's old girlfriend that he'd been to District Four with a date. Likely his ex would try to contact him. It was common knowledge that a man with a girlfriend automatically became more attractive to every other woman.

And of course, Peeta being the kind, considerate soul he was would return his ex's communication. He'd probably start some online thing with the old girlfriend, maybe they'd Skype each other and next thing Katniss knew he'd stop asking her out. He'd probably fire her as well. His ex would see to that.

Then like before, she'd be out of work. She wouldn't be able to pay rent to Effie, so she'd be back on her sister's couch, or if Rory had his way this time, in a homeless shelter.

Suddenly Katniss couldn't breathe. She stood in front of the table, wet rag in-hand, gasping loudly as a wave of bad thoughts washed over her. It wouldn't be much longer until she was on the streets, pushing a shopping cart containing all her belongings.

Peeta came out of the kitchen carrying a tray of muffins.

"Katniss, what's wrong?" He dropped the tray onto the front countertop and rushed toward her.

The room was beginning to spin as Peeta put his hands on her waist. Spots were appearing in front of her eyes as Peeta turned her around and pushed her down in the booth to sit.

"Are you all right? Do you want me to call an aid car?"

She shook her head, the warmth rushing to her face.

"No don't call. I'm all right. Just dizzy. I just need to put my head down."

She set her head onto the wet tabletop to catch her breath. She wanted to flee the bakery, embarrassed to have had a panic attack in front of Peeta.

Peeta rubbed gentle circles on her back while she caught her breath. After a few minutes Katniss lifted her head, looking around the bakery to be sure it was still empty.

"Look, why don't I take you home to rest."

Katniss opened her mouth to argue with him, but his brow was furrowed and she could see the worry in his eyes.

"Okay."

"Can you walk?"

Was he planning to carry her back to Effie's shop?

"I can walk."

She got out of the booth and he followed her out of the bakery turning the "Open" sign on the door around to "Closed" and locking it.

"I can make it a few doors down Peeta," she complained.

He had put his arm around her waist as if he thought she might collapse on the sidewalk. He kissed her temple and chuckled. "That's what a boyfriend does Katniss; he take care of the woman he loves."

Aagh why did he have to say that now? Her eyes filled with tears. She was so stupid. She did not deserve someone so nice.

Effie's eyebrows rose when she saw Peeta leading Katniss into her shop.

"Oh no, what's wrong?"

"Katniss had a dizzy spell or something. I think she needs to rest."

"Of course," Effie said. "Can you watch my shop? I'll be right back."

"All right," Peeta answered, his arm dropping from Katniss. "I'll stop by later," he said, kissing her cheek.

"Thank you," she muttered.

Effie led Katniss upstairs. "I can shut my shop up and make you some soup."

"No. I'll think I'll take a nap. I didn't get much sleep last night," Katniss lied.

Effie nodded. "Now dear, is there any chance that you're pregnant? I know you and Peeta…"

Katniss' mouth flew open. "No, no, Effie, there's no chance at all."

She hurried into her bedroom and slammed the door. She lay down on her bed feeling like a fool.

She fell asleep after a while. Later Effie knocked on her door, and without waiting for an answer carried in a tray with chicken soup, a cheese bun from the bakery, and a small bouquet of dandelions tied with a ribbon.

"I though you might want something to eat," Effie said. "Peeta brought over the cheese bun and these weeds." Effie picked up the dandelions and frowned in disapproval. "He wanted to see you but I told him that you were sleeping. I didn't think it was appropriate for him to be visiting you in your bedroom."

Katniss snickered at Effie's last comment. She'd already accused Katniss of being pregnant. Would Peeta's presence in her room make a difference?

"If you like, I can leave your door open. I'm sure Buttercup would like to visit."

"That's all right Effie, I wouldn't want to pass along any germs to your cat."

"I don't think it works that way," Effie said. But she closed the door when she left.

Katniss picked up the dandelions and smiled that he'd remembered. She'd told Peeta about her secret love of that yellow flower when they had gone on their picnic a few weeks earlier. He must have closed the shop early and gone hunting through the neighborhood picking them out of cracks in the sidewalk to collect them for her.

Why did he have to be so nice? He'd set roots in her heart that would hurt like hell to pull up.

An inner voice spoke. Why would you pull them up? Why not water them and let them grow with wild abandon? See what happens.

She didn't recognize the strange voice. Who was this person daring her to take a chance? A new and improved Katniss?

Her immediate thought was to stifle this newcomer. But she had to admit that she'd never once talked herself into a panic attack over a guy.

Maybe you're falling for him too.

Was her cold heart growing warm? It hurt to feel so much. Maybe she'd ripped off too much wallpaper.

She returned to work the next morning. Over a breakfast of tea and muffins, Katniss admitted to Peeta that what she'd experienced was likely a panic attack.

Compassion appeared in his eyes. "Have you gotten them before?"

"A couple of times in the past, but that was years ago."

"Does it happen randomly or did something bring it on?"

Katniss dropped her head and played with her muffin, poking the nuts with a fork. "I was thinking about… well, I brought it on myself. "

Peeta took a sip from his mug and then set it down. He rubbed the back of his neck and then picked up his napkin and twisted it.

"Were you thinking about us?"

Her cheeks grew warm and she guessed Peeta read her answer in her face.

"Look if this is about what I said last weekend, if you're feeling pressured or something, I understand. If you want to stop this altogether," he moved his hand toward her and back to himself, "it's fine. We're still friends. This won't impact your job. I'm a big boy and I can handle rejection."

Did he think she wanted to break up with him?

"It's not that," she cried out. She reached for his hand across the table, holding it tight. "I was thinking about your old girlfriend and I spun it out of control and lost it."

A look of relief came over him. He reached for her hand across the table. "Oh Katniss."

"It felt like I was in a competition with this invisible woman and I was worried that she'd come back and claim you."

A smile appeared on Peeta's face. "Competition, huh?"

"Well I don't have much competition here." She looked around the empty shop. "But when we were at District Four you knew just about every woman in the place and…" Her voice grew higher and her face warmer.

Peeta interrupted. "Katniss you don't have much competition anywhere. You're a far better person than anyone who works at District Four now or in the past."

"You don't know me that well to be making a statement like that."

"I disagree," he said. "And anyway I'm getting to know you better ever day."

She shook her head as if unsure whether to believe him.

"Actually I wanted to talk to you about something. I've been thinking maybe it's time that we tell Dr. Aurelius that we're dating. It's getting kind of difficult to talk with him and not mention you by name. You're becoming a part of my life. What do you think?"

"But what if he drops one of us as a patient?" That worry had been the reason they'd both avoided telling the doctor about their relationship so far.

"If it comes to that, I'll volunteer to change doctors. See someone else."

"But you've been with him longer," Katniss argued.

A loud pounding on the door interrupted them. They both turned to look. Effie Trinket stood outside the door with her oversized coffee mug in her hand.

She was pointing to the watch on her wrist as if to indicate that it was past time to open the bakery.

"We'll talk about it later," Peeta said. He stood up and hurried to the door to unlock it. He was turning the sign over to "Open" as Effie walked in.

"And how are you on this beautiful morning Effie."

Effie beamed. "Just fine Peeta. Sorry to interrupt your conversation. It looked so serious. But it's already ten after eight."

"No problem, Effie," Peeta said. He walked back to their table to clear it while Katniss took Effie's mug and got her some coffee.

Once Peeta had gone into the back room, Effie caught Katniss' eye. "What was all that about? I thought Peeta was upset at first, but then he got such a big smile on his face. Are you…"

"No," Katniss stopped her. Did Effie seriously think she was pregnant? "We were ironing out a misunderstanding. It's nothing more."

"If you say so dear."

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Later evening, Prim called. "So how's it going with the baker?"

Katniss had told her sister about Peeta when she'd first moved in with Effie. Instead of getting angry along with her about Peeta's telling her to find a new place to live, Prim had said it was "sweet and refreshing" that he'd wanted to date her. "Don't blow it Katniss. He sounds like he could be serious."

"We're fine," Katniss answered. "He's taken me out a lot."

"You're lucky you know," Prim said. "Rory and I never have the time to go out anymore. In fact that's why I'm calling. We have two tickets to the opera this weekend and we can't make it. Would you like them?"

An opera? "I don't know," Katniss said. "What is it?"

"Romeo and Juliet. At least you know the story even if you can't understand what they're singing since it's in French."

Katniss had wanted to treat Peeta to an evening out. But an opera? Would he even be interested?

"Can I give you my answer tomorrow?"

"Sure."

They continued their conversation with Prim prattling on about work and Wren and some minor renovations that she and Rory were having done to their house.

It was funny how her relationship with her sister had changed once Katniss had found a job and a place to live. In Katniss' mind, they were back to being equals again.

She told Peeta about the tickets the next morning over breakfast. "Would you be interested in joining me? I could take you out to dinner first." She hoped he understood that this was a date she was asking him on and that she meant to pay for the meal.

"I've never been to an opera," Peeta said. "But there's always a first time for everything. I'd love to go with you."

"Good," Katniss said. "I'll make dinner reservations for us then."

When Effie heard about the date to the opera she insisted that Katniss borrow a dress from her closet. "You need to dress up."

But the outfit she showed Katniss, with it's long skirt and heavy beading, looked like something Katniss would wear if she were walking the red carpet of the Oscars.

"I think that's a bit much," Katniss said. "What about this?" She pointed to a classic pink sheath with cap sleeves and a scoop neckline.

"Yes, you might as well wear it while you still can," Effie said casting a sideways glance to Katniss' midsection.

"I'm not pregnant Effie. I already told you."

"Oh, Katniss, I was only joking."

Katniss frowned. Effie wasn't the joking type. But her landlady had been acting strangely ever since her niece's visit. She was constantly checking her phone for messages and then excusing herself to go into her bedroom for long stretches. She even forgot to feed Buttercup one evening. Something was going on and Katniss suspected it involved more than planning a wedding.

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"Does your sister attend the opera regularly?" Peeta asked over dinner. He was looking especially handsome wearing a gray dress suit that Katniss had never seen before.

Katniss snorted. "No. I think Rory must have got these tickets from one of his patients."

When they got to the theater, the usher led them to an overhanging balcony area that hung low to the stage. "I didn't realize the seats were this close," Katniss whispered. She looked around the theater in awe. She'd been to fancy theaters before but the Panem Civic Auditorium was particularly lavish with crystal chandeliers, thick red carpet, and plush padded theater seating.

The balcony held four other seats and the occupants for them didn't arrive until just before the theater lights dimmed and opera began.

It wasn't until the first intermission that Katniss glanced at the two couples that shared the box with them. She nearly gasped out loud. One of the men was Seneca Crane, the president and owner of her old company, the business that had laid her off almost a year and half earlier.

Although it wasn't Seneca's fault that Katniss' life had fallen apart as a result of that job loss, seeing him in the flesh brought back an avalanche of miserable memories.

What was he doing in Panem? His business was located on the other side of the state.

Quickly turned her head back to Peeta. Could she avoid speaking with Seneca altogether?

But he'd already noticed her. "Is that you Katniss?"

She turned her head back to him, but not before she threw Peeta a nervous glance.

"Seneca, how are you?" she said, her voice taking on a fake cheeriness. "What are you doing here in Panem?"

Next to him sat a stunning redhead wearing in a low-cut dress, who was clinging to his arm. Likely one of his usual bimbos.

"I could ask you the same thing Katniss? What are you doing these days?"

Katniss' mind raced. She didn't want to tell him that she spent most of the day working the counter at Mellark's bakery. He would think she was a complete loser, after all she'd been the director of marketing for his business.

"I started my own freelance business in Panem," she said. Okay so, Peeta was her only paying client so far, but Effie would pay if Katniss could figure out how to animate Buttercup.

Seneca smiled condescendingly. "Do you have a business card?"

Katniss blanched. She hadn't gotten that far along.

"I don't have one with me." She held up the tiny clutch Effie had loaned her.

Seneca laughed. "Of course not. Who are your clients?"

Damn him, she was sure he could tell she was exaggerating. "Mellark Bakery is my biggest one at present," she responded.

"Never heard of them."

"Mellark's is the most popular bakery in Panem," Peeta broke in.

Seneca threw Peeta a disdainful look. "And who are you?"

"This is my boyfriend Peeta." Katniss didn't want Peeta to say his last name. It would make her look pathetic if her only client was her boyfriend.

Fortunately the lights dimmed and the show began again.

Later when a longer intermission occurred, Katniss whispered to Peeta that she wanted to get up and stretch. Apparently Seneca, his redheaded date, and the other couple did as well. They all left the boxed enclosure together.

While Seneca's group went off to the bar for refreshments, Katniss and Peeta walked around the theater admiring the architecture and then sitting on a love seat they located in a tiny alcove that overlooked the street below.

"Who is that guy?" Peeta asked.

"I'm sorry I didn't introduce you. His name is Seneca Crane. He was the president and owner of the company where I used to work."

"The place that laid you off?"

She scowled. "Yeah."

"He seems like a jerk," Peeta said. "Did you work very closely with him?"

Katniss eyed him carefully. Was Peeta jealous?

"Unfortunately I did. And you're right. He is a jerk." She remembered him calling her into his office and telling her about the ending of her job. She'd been stunned, and he'd actually laughed about it.

"Did you ever date him?"

Peeta was jealous.

"Good grief, no, Peeta. I have far better taste than that."

"I should hope so," Peeta said, reaching round her shoulder to pull her closer.

"That weird design in his beard is creepy though," Peeta added. "How does he do that? Does he use a stencil on his face?"

The image of Seneca Crane holding a plastic template up to his face as he shaved every morning made Katniss laugh.

"We should probably get back to our seats," Peeta suggested. "I can't wait to find out what happens next."

"I hope you brought a handkerchief. The ending is sad," Katniss said as they walked back to the enclosure.

"Someone told me that."

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"Thank you for a lovely evening out," Peeta murmured. He had backed her up against the front door of the antiques shop and was kissing her good night. Katniss desperately wanted to invite Peeta upstairs, but with Effie there she didn't dare.

She wondered why Peeta didn't bring her back to his own apartment so they could take things further. While she greatly enjoyed her make-out sessions with him, which generally took place in his car or up against Effie's doorway, she wasn't a virginal high school student. She was a grown woman who longed for far more. Surely he couldn't be satisfied with the way things were.

She needed to talk to him about it, but she dreaded that awkward conversation, still smarting from his rejection months earlier. She pulled away.

"Goodnight Peeta."

The next weekend Katniss went to a baseball game with Peeta. The weekend after that he asked her to a concert in the park.

For Katniss' May 8th birthday, Prim and Wren took Katniss and Peeta out to dinner. She was glad that Peeta and her sister hit it off so well, and secretly pleased that Rory couldn't attend because he was out of town at a conference. Although Wren had only met Peeta once, the little girl remembered the bakery and his sugar cookies and couldn't stop talking about them.

An especially long make-out session in Peeta's car followed the birthday dinner. Maybe it was her full stomach, stuffed with lamb stew and cake, or maybe she was simply overwhelmed in the passion of the moment that made Katniss blurt out her own declaration. "I love you too," she murmured back to Peeta while he was kissing her neck and whispering sweet words into her ear.

Peeta pulled away to look her full in the face. "Do you really mean that Katniss?"

Did she? An overwhelming sense of contentment washed over her. She nodded, smiling shyly. She hadn't intended to say those words to him that night, hadn't even fully thought out their meaning, but now that she had spoken them aloud, she realized it was true. She did love Peeta. He'd snuck up on her completely. It may have taken her thirty years, but she was in love.

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"So Katniss do you have anything to tell me?" Dr. Aurelius pressed.

She knew what he was getting at. She had finally agreed with Peeta that they should tell Aurelius about the two of them.

"I'm dating Peeta Mellark, one of your patients," she stated. "Were you surprised when he told you about us?"

Katniss had been greatly relieved when Peeta told her that Dr. Aurelius had no intentions to drop either of them as patients.

"Oh, I can't divulge information about my work with another client," the doctor said. "But I will tell you that I knew something was going on. It was like I was hearing the same story from two different points of view.

"I told Peeta and I'll tell you too, I'd be more than happy to see both of you together if you'd like. Maybe we could address some of those couples' issues."

Katniss eyes grew big and her jaw dropped. What in the hell had Peeta said? Did he tell the doctor they were having problems?

The doctor must have guessed rightly at her frantic thoughts because he shook his head and smiled reassuredly. "So you can prevent anything from coming up, my dear."

"Oh."

"Like that panic attack you told me you had last month."

Katniss grimaced, embarrassed about that evidence of her insecurity. But that had happened the previous month. She was past all that now.

Katniss spent the rest of the session talking about her run-in with Seneca Crane. It had left her unsettled. "Having him ask me about my work made me feel like a loser."

"Why?"

"I used to have a great job and now I work the counter at a bakery."

"What about your freelance work?"

"Peeta's my only client, and he's my boyfriend."

"So if your boyfriend employs you, the work isn't real?"

"No, that's not what I mean. And he wasn't even my boyfriend when he asked me to set up the website.

"The thing is I haven't put in any effort to find new clients," Katniss explained. "My old boss asked for my business card and I lied and said I didn't have one with me, but I've never had any printed up."

As the doctor let her ramble, instead of getting discouraged she found her spirits lift. There was no reason she couldn't print up business cards, even set up a website to publicize herself.

Katniss left the appointment with a sense of hope. She spent her evening designing a business card and took her flash drive to a copy center to print them out after work the next day. Then she began visiting the shops in the neighborhood during her lunch break to pass out her card and speak with the owners.

Within the week she had two new clients, Leevy Smith, who sold handmade soaps and natural beauty creams, and Thom Davis, who had a sporting goods store specializing in soccer equipment.

Her days grew longer as she went straight to work putting together marketing plans for both small businesses, as well as creating websites for them. She labored at Effie's dining table, joining her landlady who sat across from her making multiple lists and occasional calls regarding her niece's wedding.

"They're only inviting thirty guests, but they might as well invite 300 because the planning is the same no matter the size," Effie said.

Katniss nodded absentmindedly.

"Just wait until you have to do this."

Katniss snorted. "I'm never getting married."

"What?" Effie put down her pencil and stared at Katniss. "You can't be serious? But what about…" Her voice dropped off.

Katniss looked away from her computer screen for a moment to catch the look of surprise on Effie's face. She'd answered Effie without thinking, speaking out of habit.

It was true that Katniss had never given much thought to marriage, but she'd also never been in a relationship before.

"I don't know," she admitted. "I've guess I've never thought about it."

"Well you should think about it," Effie said. "I see how Peeta looks at you."

Katniss grew warm.

"Well surely you must know how he feels," Effie prodded.

"Ah, yeah, he's mentioned stuff," Katniss muttered. Her eyes flew back to her computer screen. Effie picked up her cell phone and went into her bedroom to make yet another private call.

But Effie's comment had rattled Katniss so much that she couldn't concentrate on her work. After ten minutes she packed everything up, and went into her bedroom.

Katniss nearly choked on her hot chocolate the next morning when Peeta asked her if she'd like to join him at his godfather's cabin that weekend. "It's next to a lake in the woods. We could drive up Saturday after we close the bakery and come back Sunday night."

Finally. She was more than ready to take that next step with Peeta.

His cheeks were pink. "Look I don't want to pressure you. We don't have to…" his voice trailed off nervously. "But it's pretty up there this time of year and I think you'd like the setting."

"Yes, I'll go with you," Katniss said quickly. She'd been waiting for Peeta to make a move to push their relationship along. She was glad he'd finally done so because she hadn't wanted to bring up the conversation.

She spent the rest of the day planning her clothes for the short trip, thinking she needed to make a visit to a lingerie shop before Saturday came round.

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Late Thursday before the bakery closed, the phone rang. Peeta picked it up. He listened for a while and then said, "look, can you hold for a minute?"

He covered the mouthpiece. "Katniss, it's that guy Seneca Crane. He says he's been trying to track you down. Do you want to talk with him?"

Katniss was puzzled. What did he want? She almost told Peeta to hang up; still she was curious.

Instead she reached for the phone.

Peeta left the front of the shop to give her some privacy.

Seneca started right in. "Katniss, how are you doing?"

"Fine."

"Great. Look, I have a client you might be interested in working with. Could you stop by the main conference room at Hotel Panem tomorrow morning around 9 a.m. I've got some folks here who would like to meet you."

Katniss heart beat faster. Seneca might be a first-class jerk, but he knew people, people who owned businesses far larger than Mellark Bakery.

"Let me check my schedule," she said. Katniss covered the mouthpiece.

"Peeta," she called

Peeta came in from the back of the shop.

"Would it be all right if I was late tomorrow morning? I may have a new freelance client. I'd probably be back in by 10 or 10:30 at the latest."

Peeta grinned. "No, it's fine. I'll stay in the front and take care of the customers until you get in."

"Thanks."

She uncovered the mouthpiece. "That would work. I'll see you tomorrow then Seneca."

She hung up the phone. "Yippee," she shouted, her face breaking into a broad smile. Impulsively she kissed Peeta. Things were looking up.

Katniss had planned to go lingerie shopping after work, but now she needed to pick up a blouse to pair with her pencil skirt.

Memories of previous shopping trips from her old life flooded her as she carried her bags back home that evening. She showed Effie the crisp white blouse with its Peter Pan collar and her new black pumps, but she hid the orange negligee. She'd already told Effie that she'd be gone for the weekend with Peeta, now she told Effie about her job meeting for the next morning.

"I could have loaned you something to wear," Effie pouted. "I have some lovely dress suits."

"Thanks, but I want to look like myself," Katniss said.

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Katniss arrived at the hotel fifteen minutes early. She had borrowed Peeta's car and she sat in it, flipping nervously through the leather binder she carried that contained copies of her resume.

The car smelled of frosting which eased her nervousness because it reminded her of Peeta.

She glanced at the time on her phone and then shoved it into her purse. Taking one last glance at herself in the rear view mirror, she got out of the car, locking the door and then walking into the hotel.

The main conference room was on the first floor and she set off in that direction. The door was open; she peered into the room.

Seneca was seated at a table and two other men sat across from him.

She cleared her throat. Seneca looked up. "Oh Katniss, there you are. On time as usual." He stood up to greet her, and the other men did as well.

Seneca indicated that she sit in the chair next to him. She sat down first; the men followed.

"This is Katniss Everdeen, the former head of marketing at Crane Industries," Seneca introduced her.

One of the men held out his hand across the narrow table and Katniss stretched out her hand to shake his. However instead of shaking it, the man squeezed it.

"Hello," he said in a thick French accent.

The second man held out his hand next and did the same. He too had a thick accent.

Meanwhile Seneca Crane introduced the two men. The first was Alain Cray, the second Francois Thread.

"Let me bring you up to speed Katniss," Seneca began. "I'm in the process of selling Crane Industries to a French company. Alain and Francois work in the legal offices of the business. In order to make a smooth transition, they are interested in getting help from some key former employees for a limited period of a year. Since you were in charge of Marketing and sat in on so many meetings in with the heads of other departments, your knowledge is most valuable to them."

Katniss blinked. Never in a million years would she have expected to return to her old company. Hell, to return as a consultant. Her heart thumped so loudly she wondered if the others could hear it.

"Can you tell me more about it?"

Seneca described the responsibilities. It sounded like an awful lot of work. She'd definitely have to quit her job at the bakery. There's no way she could do everything they required in the evenings and weekends. In fact, from Seneca's description it sounded like not only her days would be full, but some of her evenings and weekends as well.

But she would have had to eventually quit the bakery once her freelance work took off, she reasoned. Of course, Peeta should have no trouble finding a replacement for her. Mellark's was a nice place to work and Peeta was a good boss. And even if she wasn't working with Peeta any longer, she'd still be dating him.

"It all sounds very interesting," Katniss said.

"Would you be able to come back tomorrow morning at eleven to meet with Coriolanus Snow, the company's president? He's currently en route from Paris, but he'll be here tomorrow morning."

Katniss frowned. Peeta had said they would leave for cabin after the bakery closed at noon.

"Okay. But I have some plans for the afternoon."

"That shouldn't be a problem," Seneca said.

It was close to noon when she got back to the bakery. "I'm sorry I'm so late," she said as burst into the shop. "I had no idea I was there so long."

"I won't hold it against you if you tell me all about it," Peeta said.

When the bakery cleared out around two, Peeta told Katniss to take a break. They sat in a booth and ate cheese buns, while Katniss told him about the job.

"It sounds great." Peeta's happiness for her was genuine and Katniss marveled again that she had such a supportive boyfriend.

"I might need to quit working here though," Katniss murmured, throwing him an apologetic look.

"I understand," Peeta said. He reached across the table and squeezed her hand. "But it's not like we won't see each other, right."

She beamed. Yeah she'd be seeing him in her bed soon.

When Effie heard that Katniss was going back for a second interview with the president of the French firm, no less, she insisted that Katniss borrow something to wear. "You're representing America now, you don't want him to think you're a slob."

Katniss rolled her eyes, but she accepted Effie's loan of a simple suit skirt and boxy jacket. She could wear the same white blouse underneath the coat.

She brought the clothes to the bakery in a hanging bag the next morning. Peeta had to deliver a couple of wedding cakes, but he was back in plenty of time for her to change. Again she borrowed his car.

"I'll get back as soon as I can," she told him, "so we can leave for the cabin."

She'd already packed her overnight bag the previous evening. It was in the back of Peeta's car.

Only Seneca was in the conference room when she arrived. "There's been a slight change in plans," he said. "President Snow wants to speak with you over lunch. We'll be meeting him at 12:30 p.m."

Katniss scowled. Damn. This was going to throw off their travel schedule considerably.

"Is something wrong?" Seneca asked.

"I'm going out of town with my boyfriend," Katniss explained. "I'll need to call him to say I'll be late."

"All right," Seneca said.

Peeta responded with, "no problem." Immediately she calmed down.

She spent the time chatting with Seneca about his future plans now that he was finalizing the sale of the his business.

"I plan to do a lot of traveling," he said. "Maybe I'll come visit you."

"Huh?"

Seneca laughed. "Did we skip over that part yesterday? This job will require you to live in Paris for a year."

"Paris?"

"That's right."

A knot formed in her stomach. Move to Paris? A year ago she would have been overjoyed at the opportunity, but now that she had met Peeta, now that they had grown closer she didn't want to leave him. She loved him.

"Would there be any possibility I could commute?" Katniss asked. "After all most of my work is done online."

Seneca laughed. "That won't work. You'll have to train the staff in Paris to do the job. You need to physically be there."

Eventually they left the conference room to join President Snow and Alain and Francois in the dining room of the hotel. Katniss smiled brightly and listened to the white-haired man drone on and on about his firm and the people who worked for them. It wasn't so much an interview as an opportunity for the man to get to know her.

Lunch took forever, the president ordered two bottles of wine. Katniss drank less than half of the glass poured for her. She desperately wanted to escape, eager to get on the road with Peeta. After lunch they'd all gone back to the conference room and the president offered her the job point blank.

"It's a fine opportunity," she agreed. "But I'd like to think it over and get back to you."

Seneca had flushed at her comment and she guessed he wanted her to accept the job outright. But she couldn't do that. The more she thought about it, the more her stomach hurt.

"Playing hard to get?" President Snow laughed. "Maybe I should have mentioned the salary. He named an amount that was more than twice what Seneca had paid her and added that she'd be housed in a corporate apartment on the Left Bank.

Katniss swallowed hard. She had to get out of there.

"I'll get back to you in a couple of days," she blurted out. She sprang out of her chair and rushed from the room. It was 4 p.m. by the time she got to Peeta's car.

She called Peeta to say she was on her way.

Thirty minutes later she pulled up in from of Mellark's. She jumped out of the car and hurried back to her home above Effie's shop.

"How did everything go?" Effie asked.

"All right," Katniss didn't want to tell Effie about the job's location; she didn't have the time. "I need to change my clothes and get going."

She rushed downstairs and met Peeta out in front. He put his bag into the trunk. Katniss handed him the keys and he opened the back to put his bag into the car.

"How long will it take to get there," she asked as Peeta left the surface streets and turned onto the state highway.

"A couple of hours." He reached for her hand and gave her a quick smile. "Meanwhile, tell me how the interview went. Do you think they'll offer you the job?"

Katniss bit her lip. "They did offer it to me."

Peeta turned to grin at her. "Congratulations, that's wonderful."

"Well I haven't accepted it yet," she cautioned. "I asked for a few days to think it over."

"What's to think over?"

"I'd have to move to Paris. For a year."

"Oh." Peeta's grip on the steering wheel tightened, causing his fingers to go white.

Katniss' throat tightened. She studied Peeta's hand noticing a streak of green color down the side of his wrist. Was it frosting? It almost looked like paint.

"Do you want to do that?" His voice changed. He sounded nervous.

"I don't know." It was tearing her up inside. How could she leave Peeta? But then again how could she pass up such a wonderful opportunity?

Peeta didn't say anything more and Katniss grew uncomfortable. She began to ramble, mentioning the apartment and the large salary.

"Wow," he finally spoke. "It sounds almost too good to be true."

"It is," she muttered.

They didn't talk and Peeta continued to drive. The sun slowly went down and the sky turned orange.

"That's my favorite color," Peeta said, absentmindedly.

A few minutes later, he pulled the car to the shoulder of the road, and turned off the engine.

"Is something wrong?" Katniss' stomach dropped as she noticed the sorrowful look on Peeta's face.

"I think we should go back."

"What? But why?"

"I wouldn't feel right about spending the weekend with you if you're going to be leaving soon. It would be easier to have a clean break if we haven't been physical."

Was he serious?

"I haven't accepted the job yet," she reminded him.

"But it sounds like you're giving it serious consideration and I don't want to impact your decision."

"Well," she paused, "even if I did take it, it's not like we'd have to break up."

But even as she said the words, she knew that a long-distance relationship would be a disaster. With a year-long contract she'd likely get no time off to come back to Panem to visit. And Peeta was running a business that was open six days a week. Was he supposed to shut down the bakery to visit her? Could she reasonably expect him to put his life on hold for a year to wait for her? They were both thirty now. A lot of things could happen over the course of a year apart.

Peeta gave her a sad look and turned his blinker on to merge back into traffic. He got off at the first exit and then turned the car around to head back in the direction of Panem.

Neither spoke for a long while.

"I feel like you're trying to manipulate my decision," Katniss finally said.

He didn't answer and she worried what he thought. Worried that no matter what she decided about the job, Peeta had seen her initial uncertainty and was going to end the relationship as a result.

"I'm sorry if it seems that way. But I think I'd be manipulating your decision if we went to the cabin and slept together. I'm only trying to protect us."

"You're only trying to protect yourself." But even as Katniss said the words she knew he had every right to protect his heart. He would be foolish not to.

And would spending the weekend with Peeta, finally taking their relationship further, and then moving out of the country make her happy? No, it would break her. Because anything she did with Peeta would be far more than a weekend fling now. She was in love with him.

He dropped her off in front of Effie's shop.

"Goodnight Katniss. I'll see you at work Monday." He handed her her bag from the back of the car, and kissed her cheek goodbye.