This chapter is dedicated to Rose, because, aside from Nightingale herself, she's my favorite character in this series. Originally she was supposed to be very much her mother's daughter, but she kept changing, evolving, until she became a perfect blend of both her parents with a little something extra that is all Rose... and I love that. Also, consider this a sort of epilogue (yeah, I'm giving you the epilogue before the ending, I'm quirky like that). Hope you'll enjoy the chapter, and we'll meet again for this fic's (and the series) finale next week!
The song in this chapter is "Memories" as sung by Within Temptation.
Pegasus
Gifts must be valued, enjoyed, used, but never, ever abused.
When she first opened her eyes something felt decidedly off. It was… she wasn't even sure if she had eyes at all, or what most would consider a body for that matter. It was as if she were there, and not at all, physical and ethereal, walking, floating, all at the same time. It was the oddest sensation, so completely alien, and yet also perfectly natural, somehow.
The next shock came when realizing she wasn't alone, there were others all around her, just like her. One moment they'd look close to human (except for being so beautiful no mortal creature, not even the Ljósalfár could possibly compare) dressed in elegant clothes of the richest materials; then there would be some kind of shift and they would all (herself included) become beings that seemed to almost be made of light, mist, and other elements, without faces, something clearly beyond their world, beyond any world.
Eventually she understood it, she was in Aman, and right then she was one of the Valie. She was witnessing what and who she'd once been, not from the outside, like she usually did, but as a part of the whole. Like a mix of a vision and a memory.
At some point one of the others came closer, called her name… she heard it, knew it was hers, but couldn't have repeated it herself. They walked together until reaching a balcony that seemed to be made of the whitest marble, crystal and something much purer than either. From there they could see everything: there was a beautiful green valley bellow them, huge mountains on their left side, a huge crystal waterfall on their right (there was just enough of a breeze for them to feel a very slight spray every so often), and somewhere ahead a huge ocean sparkled, reflecting the light of the sun over their heads.
Two male voices rang behind the two and she turned, instantly recognizing them both, but one especially; she'd just met a pair of beautiful steel-starlight-gray eyes, eyes she knew almost better than her own, when everything around her vanished, or perhaps it was her mind that lost hold on that particular reality. She couldn't be sure.
xXx
From one breath to the next she found herself somewhere else entirely, and not just that. Her body… it took her a moment or two to grasp the fact that she was actually in a male body. While she knew that souls were beyond such a thing (she'd seen Sherlock's and John's lives, their bond had been the only true constant, everything else had been subject to change, including being male or female, the same age, one or the other older… and that was just regarding races were such things counted; the universe was a huge place, and the options just grew from there). After a moment or so she grew accustomed to being in a male body; even if she kept thinking of herself as female; in her current form she was a woman, had always been and never had reason to see herself differently. She knew her father was somewhat fluid where it came to gender, and her mother did not care either way, Rose on the other hand… she was who she was and had no need or desire to change. Didn't mean she would be unable to handle having been different at some point in the past.
The next thing Rose noticed was that she was something she'd never imagined being before. She had wings on her back! Made of something that looked half like feathers, half like actual fire… she was a freaking phoenix! Her excitement was such that for the longest time she focused on nothing except the flying, the way the wind touched her, the shift of colors on her feathers, the way flames danced through every part of her body. Then, as she reached what looked like a huge, placid lake, she could see her reflection, and she noticed something. The way the colors of her phoenix-body shifted, it looked so much how the eyes of her latest life shifted.
A sound, like crackling distracted her. She didn't need to turn around, she knew instinctively what… who had just arrived: the bird looked even bigger than she did, in shades of blue and gray, lightning almost dancing among its almost-metallic-looking feathers. A thunderbird! It too was male (though she'd no idea how she knew that at all), didn't change the fact that it was her mate, she recognized him as easily as her Valie-self had recognized her own counterpart. And then the two were flying together, sparks and flames jumping from one to the other, almost tickling, never hurting. It was a most dazzling experience.
xXx
Another change, she found herself female again, a creature so much like a nymph, somewhere between woman and a tree, flowers entwined with her hair, which could look as hair, or at times as very thin branches and leaves. She had no feet, but roots instead. In that life there was a creature, like a fawn, who seemed to love playing around her tree, and he'd flirt with her whenever he laid eyes on her more womanly self. The only thing she could readily identify was the steel-gray of his eyes, but that was enough for her to know exactly who he was.
In another life she was yet another magical creature: a salamander, a fire dragon. She couldn't fly but there was no need for it. Her match then was perhaps the oddest, a 'winged serpent', couldn't quite be called a dragon, as his wings were more like those of a bird. Still, to her he was as gorgeous as in every other life she'd met him.
She didn't always meet him. Like the life where she was a male dwarf. She spent her whole lifetime creating things, sculptures mostly, of things she'd been and seen, half of them in shades of red, orange and black, the other half in a mix of blues and grays; she never seemed to get the mixes quite right, and he never came to her. She'd no idea if he'd died too soon, she'd been born too early, or perhaps they'd just never managed to cross paths.
Some lives, both as male and female, she definitely died too young. Especially when there was war, or some other kind of hardship. Regardless if she was born as a lowly peasant or a wealthy royal, she always felt the need to do something, to help. Sometimes that would be good, others it would get her killed. Still, she never gave up. In many of those lives she didn't manage to find her love before her life came to an end. But that was alright, perhaps; she couldn't imagine seeing him suffer so, that just might have destroyed her.
xXx
There was one especially interesting life, where she was born female and a druid. She's Rohesia, a druid orphan-girl capable of very basic spells; her very best though, are those meant for seeing the future. She saw a lot. While everyone in her tribe knew the prophecy of the Once and Future King, as it had been passed on through generations for a very long time, she could see more. For so long the elders in the tribe had spoken of the boy-prince who would turn into a Warrior-King, who would lead his nation into a Golden Age, with the help of the most powerful sorcerer of their time… who would die by the hand of one of their own (a druid).
If there's one thing Rohesia didn't understand it's why, if her people knew the prophecies so well, the good and the bad. If they had even the slightest idea of how much better things could be, why hadn't they done something to stop the bad from happening? It made no sense. It was just one man, one! Without him the King wouldn't die, the Golden Age would endure, their people (all of their people, druids and britons) would be safe!
Eventually she got it into her head that if no one else would do something about it, then she would. So she set out looking for the one destined to slay the prophesied king. What she found… it's nothing like she could have ever expected. It wasn't an evil man bent on murder and destruction, it wasn't a monster; no, what she found was a boy, a sweet little boy, doing nothing other than trying to make a life for himself. Rohesia was so confused… that child couldn't possibly be the monster that would destroy everything! That would end the Golden Age they'd all dreamed of.
She debated with herself for a long time, eventually deciding that something in the prophecy must be wrong. Perhaps there was another who bore that name. Perhaps someone else would do the deed and blame that child. She didn't know. So instead she tried to come up with a different plan. Rather than focus on destroying the would-be killer, she decided to protect the King.
It didn't exactly work as she'd planned. Things were more complicated in Camelot than she ever expected. While Druids were no longer persecuted, as they'd been in the past, and Emrys being the King's Adviser and Court Sorcerer meant that no one reacts badly when she used magic to light a fire at night, she was still nothing more than a girl to them. First they saw her as nothing more than a beggar or a supplicant; one even believed her to be a prostitute and tried to take advantage, only to almost lose a hand to her fire. Even when she finally made it to the city, she had no way of getting to the palace, much less the King.
So she spent several years doing jobs here and there, at an inn and tavern, for an herbalist, helping everyone she could. Until eventually someone recommended her and when an opening came, she found herself as a maidservant in the palace; and while she couldn't help but find it insulting (back at the druid camp she'd been so much more, and had had the potential for more still… but it was her choice to walk away, to seek a different destiny), she kept reminding herself that it's the right thing to do. That sometimes sacrifices needed to be made in order to achieve one's goals. And if she did achieve hers, it would help so many people.
It was but days after beginning to work in the castle that she met Sir Piers. It was a completely accidental meeting. She was hurrying down one of the servant's passages, fuming after a drunken stable-hand tried to take advantage of her, so furious she wasn't really looking where she was going. And then she slammed into him. He had extended a hand, probably to catch her, but her mood made her react, calling on a ball of fire. Surprisingly enough he pulled his hand back, but did not draw his sword, or accuse her of anything. While there's nothing wrong with magic, she had noticed that many of the soldiers were wary of it, and some could be downright hostile. And he wasn't just any warrior, as she soon discovered, he was a Knight. And not any knight, but one of the famous Round Table Knights. He was so handsome and gentlemanly and honorable, and had such a sense of humor! She fell in love with him before she was even aware of it.
At first she thought it nothing more than a nice little dream. After all, why would a Knight ever want to be with an orphaned druid? She had no name, no dowry, nothing at all to offer to one such as him. Even when he bought her drinks, offered her wildflowers and she even welcomed him into her bed one night; she didn't expect it to amount to much of anything. Proud she might be, but she knew her place, she was a servant, and he a knight. Which was why she was so surprised when, not much later, she was called to the Queen's chambers and informed by her lady-in-waiting that she'd just been named handmaiden. She had no idea how such a thing was possible, until the gossip reached her, of the Knight who had just asked his King for permission to marry a peasant girl… Piers had asked his King for leave to marry her!
The day before the wedding she shared her story with her beloved. She couldn't go into such a thing without him knowing all about her. He promised to do his best to help her, together they would make sure that, no matter what happened, their King would live.
Less than six months later, with her hands covered in her husband's blood, Rohesia could do nothing but scream. They got too close, they were close to getting proof of what was coming, and so a traitor in their midst killed him. A bloody knight had dared to put a dagger in her beloved's back! And, as she found out but an hour later, it wasn't just that, she had been framed for the death of her own husband, and no one except her Queen, and his love's sister, believed in her innocence. Rohesia refused to just lay down and die. She'd already lost her love, she had nothing left to lose. So he ran, promising to make justice for her love.
Months later: Camlann is on the horizon. The battle that had been prophesied for so long… she'd been doing her best to keep up with the army, to be the King's shield, even if he didn't know it. It seemed to be working fairly well, until she saw the last person she ever expected, the monster who killed her Piers. Rohesia lost all reason at the sight of the bastard, she was caught. With the army marching to war they had neither space nor time for a prisoner. She knew what was coming her way, and she wasn't afraid of death. She spent her last hours repeating to all who might hear her of what's coming, of the danger that lay so close to the King… no one paid her any attention. Why would they? As far as everyone was concerned she's a murderer and a betrayer of the worst kind.
She died hanged that night. She might have been able to stop it, with her magic, if she'd just tried. But she just didn't see a point anymore. She'd tried everything she could think of, for as long as she could, she was tired… The King died the next day, speared on the sword of a man who was once an innocent boy…
xXx
She had many more lifetimes, but in none of those did she bear the Sight. Nor did she have her love. Even the few where she did meet him… her life as Rohesia had left her scarred, even if she didn't actually remember it, her soul still hurt for the tragedy that once befell her love, a tragedy a part of her believed to have been her own fault. So, even if it wasn't really a conscious decision on her part, she stayed away.
And then she was born once more, as a human (or a would-be-human… her biology was actually somewhat more complicated than that), bearing the name of Rose Alfdis…
The first five years of her life were as idyllic as one would expect the life of the youngest child of a linguist and a researcher, both of them veterans of WWII, and the former also the younger sister of weapons' developer: Howard Stark. Then she turned five, and a number of things happened in a short time. First: her gifts manifested: Sight and Fire. Second: that same night, her first vision was about the death of a child her same age, dying in a fire. Rose didn't even need to think about it, she wanted (needed) to save her. And so Willow Anya became part of the family, and without fully realizing it, Rose began to alter the course of history, her own, and the world's.
Even the best Seer would never know what the world would have been like if, on that day, Rose had chosen to be like so many precogs both before and after her. If she'd chosen to See, yet do nothing about it. Be but one more silent witness to the most amazing and most terrible events in the world… But that was alright, in some ways, it was who Rose was, whom she'd always been, from the very first moment of her existence…
The years she spent growing up with Willow Anya were wonderful. She had a sister who was almost as good as her twin, who loved her without doubt or reservation. Yes, her parents loved her too but Will… she trusted Rose in a way no one else, not even the rest of her family did. She was willing to follow Rose anywhere, to drop everything, leave her whole life behind, because she said a friend needed her help. Rose had no idea what she'd have done without Will (she certainly did know what she did after losing her).
She dreamt him before she ever met him, to a point where even she for the longest time did not realize. She saw the beginning, the middle and the end, yet once she woke enough of the details were lost to her that she did not realize everything that was to come. The hope hidden in the tragedy:
The first meeting had been messy enough, with Peter so anxious, his twin sister Wendy having been drugged by their mother, who was pretty much terrified of her powers. And then there had been Willow and… yeah, things had gotten messy. By the end of the day Magda Maximoff was gone, and the twins had become part of the family.
It was weeks later, after a mission with the X-Men (of which the twins weren't part, as everyone saw them as too young to fight), that Rose had a short talk with Peter. Things had gone wrong at the end of their little mission, and if it hadn't been for Papa's magic on her bracelet, she probably would have ended with much worse than a painful bump at the back of her head. Still, she wasn't expecting it when Peter went to see her in her room, afterwards:
"Peter?" She inquired, curious about his presence there. "Come to visit your sister?"
It was said entirely in jest. He was looking at her oddly, so intensely, as if he were trying to read something in her face or body, to divine an answer to a question he hadn't yet asked. She didn't understand, no one had ever looked at her like that.
"You're not my sister." He said, words precise and hard. "You'll never be my sister."
She didn't take offense to that, it wasn't like she saw actually saw him as a brother anyway.
That was also the day when she realized that she'd fallen in love with him, almost entirely through her dreams. It was insane.
There was never really anything between Peter and her, a few dates, a couple of kisses, nothing that amounted to anything in the end. She didn't mind, not really, he was young still, probably not ready for a serious relationship. And she was confident enough in her own feelings, in them being a match, to give him as long as he needed.
Then tragedy struck, first Anya's husband, then years later Anya herself. She'd been thirty! There was nothing Rose, or Max, or any of the X-Men, not even Mama with all her healing gifts, could do. The year following Anya's death was insane, with all of them grieving, and doing their best to make sure Will's children: Django and Nina would have everything they could possibly need. It all came to a head the day after the first anniversary of her passing: Rose found Peter in their private sitting room, he wasn't in the best of moods, still she did her best to help.
"Peter...?" She asked quietly.
"Did you know I cannot sleep?" He asked, apropos of nothing. "Most nights I only get an hour or so, and that's if I'm lucky, there are days when I don't sleep more than twenty or thirty minutes, at most. I just cannot help it, it's like my body refuses to shut down. I know I should be exhausted, should be resting, but I can't..."
"Your body is always at top speed." She murmured in understanding. "You even rest fast."
"Sort of." He shrugged.
She got it. It was pretty much how her body ran at a temperature that was one or two degrees above normal human, how she could feel even the smallest flame around her, could sense the temperature around, how the hot didn't touch her, nor did cold, up to a point... past a certain point it not only touched her, it hit her, hard.
"All the same, I cannot get drunk." He finished, taking another swig from his bottle for good measure (he didn't seem to even feel the burn of the alcohol).
"Would you like to try something a little stronger?" She offered, holding the bottle she'd gone to retrieve from her bedroom, up.
"I doubt it'll be any different." He muttered, but extended a hand nonetheless.
She dropped to the floor beside him, uncorked the bottle and took a drink, hissing low in her throat at the burn it caused. Aside from a celebratory toast Anya and she'd had together the day after receiving their degrees, she hadn't had any. Had decided it was just too strong (Anya hadn't liked the taste either...). Still, it seemed right to drink it in that moment. So she passed the bottle to Peter. He took a swig with the same nonchalance he'd used with the scotch, then had to put the bottle down abruptly as he began coughing.
"Strong enough?" She asked him with a smirk.
He actually grinned at her. A smile that reminded her of Max, with the way he seemed to have too many teeth in his mouth (she'd never seen him grin with his mouth open).
"What the hell is this?" He asked, sounding actually fascinated.
"Mead... a special recipe." She answered vaguely (no way was she going to explain to him that the mead came from Asgard and had been a gift from the, honest-to-the-stars, Goddess of War.
"It's awesome!" He decided, taking another swig.
They were almost halfway through the bottle, when she noticed Peter's reaction time decreasing. He was finally getting drunk. So, deciding that was enough, she put the cork back and got comfortable beside him, waiting. He babbled for a while, at times speaking at normal speeds, at times too fast to fully comprehend him; he talked about his family, and not just Anya either.
She didn't quite notice when he turned her way, but suddenly he was kissing her. She couldn't quite process it, not really, yet she didn't need to. She just let her instinct guide her and began kissing back. They had sex that night, it was absolutely perfect. At some point she just couldn't help herself, she whispered that she loved him, then fell asleep right there, on the carpeted floor of their favorite sitting room, behind a couch and with their clothes strewn around them, Peter's arms loosely around her body.
In the morning she was still naked, but she found herself alone, her clothes carefully folded beside her. She'd no idea what was going on, a night full of visions (the same ones, about Peter) making it so she didn't quite understand what was going on. She still went searching for her wayward lover. It took her almost a full fortnight to get the chance to catch him alone, to have a talk with him in private (and that fact alone should have clued her in that something was very, very wrong).
"Peter!" She called loudly. "We need to talk."
"I need to be... elsewhere." He muttered vaguely.
"Why have you been avoiding me?" She couldn't help the demanding tone, she didn't understand what the hell was going on!
"I haven't..." He began.
"Don't lie to me!" She snapped. "What's going on Peter? I thought... that day..."
She couldn't even find the right words for it.
"It was a mistake."
And with those words, he did what nothing else could have, he made the blood freeze in her veins.
Things just seemed to keep getting worse from there: Stryker's attack on the mansion, her getting shot, and then the twins were simply… gone. They'd left the Institute entirely, without even saying goodbye (without even dropping by to see if she was alright…)
The eighties really weren't her decade, and it wasn't just the loss of Anya, and the mess with Peter. On the later half of that same decade she'd begun having awful dreams, visions, of an evil that would half destroy the world, killing thousands (possibly tens or even hundreds of thousands) in the process, Wendy included. And that last part… somehow that was going to bring Peter back to her, he would be at her side, like he was meant to.
Rose was never, not even for a fraction of a second, tempted to allow that tragedy to happen. She wouldn't have, even if so many innocent lives hadn't been on the balance. Wendy's life was more than enough, because she'd never allow the man she loved, her match (whether he was ready to accept it or not) to go through such a loss when he didn't have to.
The attack finally came in '91, and aside from the fact that she nearly got herself killed in the process, and the explosion her powers caused in Cairo made international news (though no one knew she'd caused it… official reports in fact stated she'd done her best to contain the damage, and she was, just not that damage); few people knew what had happened. No one ever knew everything she'd seen and prevented.
Then, in '92, her world seemed to come to an end:
She had known the twins had spent the years since leaving Westchester going around the world, helping mutants. That day they'd been in South America, in the Andes, having just rescued over a dozen young mutants who'd been sold into slavery (and quite probably experimentation). Things got complicated soon enough, and the twins sent the children away, staying back themselves to deal with the mercenaries. But there ere just too many of those; Peter had an injured leg which made it impossible for him to run, and Wendy was so exhausted her magic wasn't working right anymore… Then, it happened, another mercenary attacked, and there was no red-spark coming... the grenade landed at the twins' feet.
"Wendy run!" Peter yelled at his sister.
"No!" She yelled at him. "Not without you."
At the last possible second Peter turned his eyes to a side, straight at her... it was almost as if he could suddenly see her… though that was impossible.
"Rose..." He was calling to her regardless; maybe he'd known that somehow, sooner or later, she'd See. "I'm sorry."
"Tell Dad we tried our best." Wendy added for good measure.
"I love you..." Peter whispered, almost too quietly to be heard.
Then the grenade went off...
Something inside Rose, at her very core, snapped after that day. She screamed, losing control of her fire completely. If it hadn't been for young Jean Grey (Phoenix) she might have killed someone, might have killed children! She just couldn't handle it, she left.
Somehow she managed to get herself to a little known property she had in South New Mexico, a gift from her Uncle Howard, and once there she pretty much locked herself away from the world for the next five years. She didn't know it at the time, but the day she finally emerged from that place, that she began building herself a new life, was the day that Pietro and Wanda Maximoff were born…
Meeting Skye (who was called Mary back then) was a blessing in many ways, despite how short a time they had together. And then came Rose's time in Kansas. During which she learned to live with the loss of Peter (not move on, she'd known from the start she'd never move on), and embrace her identity as a Seer, as a Fire Elemental, and most importantly, as a Warrior, once again. It was also then that she began harboring the hope that, just like her Mama had returned to her Papa after her own death, her own match might return to her. For such a miracle she was willing to wait as long as was necessary.
In the end the wait wasn't even that long. She spent almost a decade in Kansas (between Smallville and Metropolis) made a lot of friends and even managed to stop at least two attempted alien invasions. Then she'd met Hakon again, along with another team of superheroes, friends of his (and, as it turned out, two of them were the reincarnations of two of her parents' oldest friends) and learned about HYDRA… that changed everything.
The Alliance didn't start then, not really. Most of its members had already been 'allied' with her, in one way or another for years. Either from the time she'd traveled around, helping, as an X-Woman, or the time she, Clark, Lex and several others had traversed the world searching for the pieces of an ancient Kryptonian artifact. In the early 2010's what she did was mostly revisit all those contacts, pick up news, and let them know the danger laying in wait beneath their very feet…
Going back to Westchester, helping against Stryker's latest (and last) attempt to invade the mansion helped her. Yet it was Sherlock's and John's history that helped her most. Despite all the sadness and tragedy woven into their story, they were a match in the purest sense of the word. They were a pair that had been together time and again, in life after life; and regardless how wrong things might go sometimes, how badly they might end… that did not stop them from meeting and falling in love with each other all over again the next time. It was seeing them together, in a life that had the potential to be better than any of their previous ones, that made her believe, for good, that one day she'd be that happy as well.
Meeting Skye again helped heal the part of her that had been hurting still about the loss of her. The fact that, even in her twenties, she still wanted her, still called her mom, it was like one of the best things that ever happened to the Seer. Skye's team was wonderful, they all clearly loved her (the way they were so protective of her, of Rose's intentions towards her, the reasons for her absence… she didn't even mind their distrust, because it was a sign of that love); and Grant. Rose's daughter had found her match! And while he might not be what most would consider a good man, he loved her, he'd chosen her, even against a man he considered family; that was enough.
Then Sokovia happened. Ultron and a mess so huge Rose never knew everything about it (though she and Tony talked extensively about it all, all the ways things had gone wrong; not only so he'd understand his mistake, but also so he wouldn't blame himself for the parts that weren't actually his fault). When Rose had her vision that day… it wasn't easy. She'd been sleeping badly for a good while, unable to remember what she dreamed, but knowing something was brewing. And then she saw, in seconds, pieces of someone's lifetime, and the last scene of an almost forgotten old vision. They'd been in the middle of the Atlantic, dealing with the attempt at a new SHIELD; then she'd the vision… the team trusted her, so much that all she needed to say was that they needed to get to Sokovia, and that was enough for all of them to be on their way, even as she remained so deeply buried in her visions she knew nothing of the real world around her until they'd landed just outside Novi-Grad, Sokovia.
Rose somehow managed to stay in denial through most of the battle, refusing to acknowledge what she knew at her core until the moment events began playing out as they had in her vision, not just earlier that day, but from the very first time, back in 1963! He was there, he almost died before they even met. It didn't matter that he looked nothing like Peter, Rose's soul knew his the moment their eyes crossed… and then he said the three words that managed to freeze her blood as much as the four he'd said that day, years prior, in Westchester…
"Who are you?" ("It was a mistake")
Of course he didn't know her. Why would he?! He was Pietro, not Peter! He had the same surname and the same gift, and a twin sister (Rose was quite sure Wanda was Wendy too!), but it was an entirely different life. Why did she expected him to know her?! She couldn't handle it, so she ran. Ran all the way back to her ranch in the desert. She didn't actually plan to stay long, or to lock herself away from the world, not again; she also didn't plan on her daughter dropping by but a week later, and bringing her boyfriend, as well as the twins with her!
They managed to catch her completely by surprise. She'd been in her backyard, in an off-white dress, barefoot, and dancing under the branches of the huge desert-rose tree when they arrived. All recent events had made it so she needed to vent, and she'd done exactly that, in the form of a song. So deep she was into that she wasn't aware of anything, until he was suddenly standing before her, repeating the exact same question:
"Who are you?"
Yet as unexpected as that might have been (as his mere presence might have been) nothing could have possibly prepared her for the next words to come out of his lips…
"Why do you seem so familiar?" He inquired, and there was a hint of steel behind his quiet, almost shy words. "I've seen you in my dreams, time and again, my whole life. Almost always in black-bodysuits, though sometimes in off-white dresses, and the fire... like living flames dancing all around you, dancing with you, yet never hurting you... I remember your eyes, warm and dark like melted chocolate and yet, at times bright and wild, shifting between red, orange, and black, like wildfire. I... I think I remember the way your voice in my ear sounds like, the softness of your skin, what you smell like: roses, vanilla and candle-wax... Why? Why do I remember all that? Why when before last week I'd never laid eyes on you?"
She had no idea what to say, she couldn't even breathe as her mind kept trying and failing to process everything he'd just said. He knew her?! He'd seen her, dreamt about her...
"I... I don't know how to even begin to explain it... where to start..." She admitted quietly.
"The beginning seems like a good place." He quipped, though he wasn't laughing.
"Let me tell you a little story then..." She let out a breath and nodded as she sat on the overgrown roots of the tree behind her, signaling for him to do the same. "I was born Rose Alfdis, on the 20th of March, in 1949..."
That day… it changed a lot of things, for the both of them. Especially when she eventually realized that she'd seen him, seen Pietro, from the very beginning, at the tail-end of the very vision that had announced Peter's arrival. Something he said stayed with her though, words she'd never forget:
"Everything you just told me..." He explained. "I know a part of you wants to ask me if it was true, what he told you at the end. If he loved you, if he wanted you, why did he not tell you before it was too late?" He let out a breath, shaking his head slightly. "I don't know. I'm not him. I'm not this Peter you so loved. I remember you, everything about you... but I don't remember being him. I'd like to think he loved you... then again, if he did, he still gave up on you, which would mean he was an idiot." He shook his head again. "I don't know what he felt, what he might have been thinking. I do know this though: I know my thoughts and my feelings. I know that you've been in them, been a part of me, for as long as I can remember." Standing before her he extended a hand, almost but not quite touching her cheek. "The memory of you dancing around gardens brought me great joy in my childhood, when our parents couldn't afford much in the way of luxuries. It was the memory of you, laying beside me, whispering in Yiddish, words of encouragement, of hope, of comfort, that got both myself and Wanda through the two days we spent underneath our bed, watching the shell of a bomb as we waited for either it to blow us up, or the rescuers to find us. And it was the memory of you standing, fighting, that gave me, gave us both the courage to do the same a week ago."
She'd been such a pivotal figure in his life, his and Wanda's both, and she hadn't known. Then again, even before she'd known about him, that he lived again, he'd been the cornerstone of her life as well. Perhaps it was only fitting, they were a match after all.
xXx
Images kept going through Rose's mind. Their trip to Westchester, introducing the twins to them. While nothing would ever erase the loss of Peter and Wendy, of Django, meeting the twins, seeing Wanda wearing Willow's old necklace (the same that had been Erik's, and his mother's), while Django wore Johann's old, beaten leather jacket, it did help.
While the twins had been thrilled at getting to know their extended family, they still had chosen not to stay at the mansion. They hadn't felt comfortable. So they'd all ended in Avengers Tower. Rose had a floor there and they all shared, when they weren't traveling around the world, either with the Avengers or the Sentinels, being heroes.
Helena had her own thing going, and while Rose knew better than to interfere, when it came to Karl Mordo, she decided to make in exception. In her mind she justified it with the fact that he'd called for her help, it didn't matter that that had been over twenty years earlier, at a time when she'd been unable to help herself, much less anyone else. So she went, in the end all she did was chat with him… well, that and give him a reason to believe in the good, in love…
Rose and Pietro never talked about the future, not really, and while for most that would mean that they weren't making any plans any commitments, for them it was exactly the opposite. The two of them knew exactly what they wanted of life and each other, they didn't even need to plan for it, they knew from the start that it was coming…
Of course, because their life was just that insane, Loki and Nightingale finally returned in the middle of a freaking epic-battle, the kind that involved the whole planet too! It was a good thing they arrived then, as their backup helped a lot, and it was Loki who closed the portal allowing the enemy in, ending the battle for good. Everyone needed to rest some in the aftermath, but the very next day Pietro went to see them about marrying their daughter. He made such a scene that Rose couldn't help but smack him in the back of the head, even as she couldn't stop laughing. What followed though, that stayed with her even more than her future-husband's humor.
"It's good to see you happy again, little rose." Her Papa said softly.
"Papa..." Rose looked like she didn't quite know what to say.
"You might not have said a word about it, but your Mama and I aren't blind, we knew since our return you weren't alright. Something happened while we were gone, something big." he explained. "Also, the words you said to us in London, just before we went to help Sherlock and John, 'They are like us', you said, you didn't just mean reincarnation, or a match, you meant halves that have lost their love…" He exhaled. "Much as we might wish you talked to us. We understand. You are a grown woman, have been for many years. Back in the seventies… we let you go, believed you had the right to make your own choices, we still believe that. We may not know Pietro, but then again, we didn't know his previous incarnation either. As long as he's your choice, we'll support it, we'll support you."
"Thank you Papa..." Rose embraced him tightly.
She was so happy in that moment, couldn't imagine ever being happier.
Then came the day of her wedding, and she was proven wrong. It was absolutely insane, with all the people who wanted to be there, all whom she called family in one way or another. Pietro didn't mind there being so many people; in fact, he enjoyed it.
"It shows how special you are." He told her just before they entered the huge ballroom. "And that I'm a right lucky bastard to be able to call you mine."
"Forever and always Neshama." She assured him.
"Ves'tacha." He replied in the same tone.
They had a wonderful honeymoon, and then they were back to preparing for the confrontation they all knew was coming; what would be the last battle against Thanos, for better or for worse (Rose always knew it'd be for the better, she had faith).
She'd never forget that moment, when time seemed to almost stop, as Thanos stood right there, seeking to destroy their world, the Valar doing their best to stop him. He was almost completely surrounded (key word being 'almost'). She made up her mind before ever realizing it, and the moment she turned to look at her love, she was sure he knew what she was thinking:
"Do you trust me?"
"Forever and always."
Forever and always… they'd trust each other, believe in each other.
They hadn't hesitated, not even for a second as they stepped forward and claimed a destiny many believed to have been lost ages prior. And as daunting as eternity might seem, she'd never regret spending it with her soul…
xXx
Rose was still smiling, a part of her still savoring the memory of earlier that night, as she and Pietro had made sweet love (it was perhaps the only activity he didn't mind doing slowly…) before falling asleep in each other's arms (before she found herself jumping through time, witnessing the history of her own existence, from her very first life. It didn't end there, there was some kind of shift in the air, and after getting a glimpse at herself, laying in bed beside her beloved, she suddenly found herself moving from the past, through the present, and into the future.
At first there were just flashes. A meeting in Stark Manor in Northern New York, between the twelve Valar and representatives of each Realm. The next showed the same place, and the Valar, except the meeting was with the representatives of the gifted on Earth, as well as the Pax Accords. Glimpses of their lives in Avengers Tower, and elsewhere too.
There hadn't been Valar in millennia, perhaps even longer (since not everyone kept time the same way, it was hard to count). But the Guardians were there to stay, Yggdrasil was no longer one world, but nine, and then there was the rest of the galaxy. More than one galaxy, in fact, for Gamora wasn't part of Yggdrasil, and Peter… even if he'd been born on Earth, a big part of him belonged out there, he was, after all, Star-Lord…
Rose got glimpses of time passing. Journeys across the planet, and into others, the lesser Realms, and eventually beyond the branches of Yggdrasil too. Into a universe that knew (at least to a point) who they all were. With voices whispering the legend of those who held the power to rid the universe of Thanos once and for all.
She saw her 'cousin' in Gotham, with his wife and his three daughters… he never had a son of his blood, but that was alright, through the years he adopted more than one boy; some followed him into the crime-fighting gig, others didn't. As for his daughters… they were all as beautiful and devious as their mother, and as bright as their father. And for the first time since he was eight years old Bruce was genuinely happy, and more importantly, he believed that the happiness would last. He might not be ready just yet to give the bat-mask up, but his family understood (and every so often a cat would join in the fun… and later on a few birds of prey…).
She saw her godchildren and extended family growing up: Kara and Connor were known as heroes and as two of the last Kryptonians (only a handful were aware of Con's origins), making a name for themselves, on and off planet. It was Sarah Rose Kent who followed her father into politics, and she did so without hiding her status as a born-gifted. She'd been born with the ability to communicate with the earth and plants, even control them a little; not much, but enough that when she got a position in the Senate, it was no secret that she not only supported the Gifted, but was one of them herself, and proud of it. She saw the twins, John and Joseph Luthor, heading Cadmus Labs and Solomon Pharmaceuticals (minor branches of LexCorp) creating wonders that would change the world. Lena Julie Luthor and Laura Mairwen Kent for their part were the faces of Veritas, partners in every possible way.
She saw Helena's pregnancy, and eventually her own; Wanda's wedding to Edward, with Pietro walking her down the aisle, and the groom being presented as Edward Jarvis-Stark, Tony's brother in all but blood. But there was one scene that stayed with her the most, one she'd seen before, though not with as much detail as right then:
They were in the beautiful garden in Salani Manor in Maine (while all official events concerning the Valar took place in Stark Mansion, and those for the Avengers happened in their tower, the more private parties happened in Westbrook). There were trees, though mostly on what looked like the limits of the garden itself, and countless flowers of every possible kind and color decorating the ground. Nightingale still favored roses the most, and a corner of the garden was still dedicated to those, but the rest of the garden held many other different kinds. Music could be heard all around, a mix of instruments that tended to include piano, violin, flute, even a guitar; it was clear some people were playing with a few new melodies; there were o specific words or song, but it was still beautiful and very, very peaceful.
There were Skye and Grant, dressed in casual attire rather than the tactical clothes they seemed to almost live in: he jeans and a dark-blue henley with rolled up sleeves; she in sleeveless, pastel-colored, floral dress. He was crouched beside some flowers, while she was slightly crouched and moving slowly towards him, hands poised at the sides of the young infant girl clearly just learning to walk. It was the kind of sight that would leave anyone breathless for a moment, it didn't matter that the child wasn't theirs. The little one had strawberry blonde hair in loose ringlets to her shoulder-blades, steel-blue eyes with a hint of gold near the iris and she was wearing a little yellow dress and white shoes.
"You're doing wonderful Anya." Skye said, sounding so very proud. "Look Mom! Look, we're learning to walk!"
Skye was delighted, and she couldn't help but look at the man a few feet from them, waiting to receive the toddling little girl, his eyes straying so often to Skye herself; then the brunette woman's eyes went down, to the old-looking and gorgeous diamond ring gracing the third finger on her left hand... It was an heirloom, one that had once belonged to a gentle woman called Jennifer Wilson, Grant's Gramsy...
Truth was, Grant wasn't much of a fan of wedding rings, part of it was all the time he'd spent in undercover ops while in SHIELD (things like your finger having a tan line limited the kind of ops you could work, a lot); the other part was simply that rings could get in the way when he was using a gun, and that was even more dangerous. Skye had chosen to follow his lead and didn't use her wedding band either… the engagement ring was an entirely different matter, though. It had been a gift to Grant, from his grandmother, one of the few people in his family who truly loved him, who tried to do right by him. She'd left him everything (though it wasn't until after the fall of HYDRA, and them putting Christian Ward in his place that Grant managed to get access to the money and properties), though the ring she handed it to him personally, so he might one day give it to the woman he'd spend the rest of his life with… and Skye was that woman. She knew the story, and thus she wore the ring, happily. Knowing, if they were very lucky, one day they'd pass it on to their own child… and Skye might not have said it yet, but she had a feeling the day for that child to join their lives might come sooner rather than later…
Several feet to the left of them (and quite close to the edge of the garden) was Rose, sitting on a swing, though not really moving, she was wearing a long, off-white dress and no shoes at all; Pietro was beside her in jeans, a gray shirt and his favorite sneakers. Both their eyes were riveted on the child, their little girl... their daughter: Anya Luna Hvedrungr-Maximoff. The child they both loved so very much, and not just them, but their whole (huge) family. Seeing her, Rose knew that all she (both of them, really) had gone through, not just in recent years, but her whole life (all of their lives) had been worth it just for the little girl learning to walk just a few feet from them.
Very close to the tree from which the swing hung, stood Wanda, laying against Edward, whose arms were around her waist, hands gently curved around her heavily swollen belly. For years they hadn't even known if it would be possible for them to have children. Even if Edward had a soul, he was still technically an android. Thankfully he didn't have to worry about losing his other half to the ravages of time, thanks to the events of years prior she was as immortal as him. Still, there had been no guarantee they'd be able to create a life together, and while she'd assured him, more than once, she'd be happy enough with just them, or perhaps adopting children one day, when they found out she was pregnant… it was a joy he'd never known, never imagined possible.
Girlish giggles were heard from the other side of the garden and there was Stephen, looking pretty much the same as ever, twirling around a laughing child, another girl: with brown hair so dark it was almost black, flying around with tiny braids adorning it and the most dazzling blue-green eyes any of them had ever seen (a perfect mix of both her parents), dressed in a miniature tanned-brown tunic and little boots. All a little sorceress... (she had everyone in the Mystic Order wrapped around her littlest finger… and it had nothing to do with her father being the Sorcerer Supreme, or her parents being two of the Valar).
"More Dada more!" The girl cried out in sheer delight.
She was Donelle Lucia Hvedrungr-Strange... Nellie for short. And she was so loved… by parents who'd gone through life after life, not having children, afraid they might lose them to the same wars and tragedies that continuously made them lose each other. But finally there was peace, and reason to believe it'd last. Perhaps not forever, but enough.
Hakon and Viktor were on the edge of the garden, watching the children, the feral mutant pretending that he did not care at all for the little ones, that he did not see them as pack, much as he did every single person in that garden… and that was quite the shock to him, all the years he'd had no one but his little brother (and even he hadn't liked Viktor much for a long time, not until his own mate got involved and made them settle matters). Hakon smiled, watching his lover from the corner of his eye, he knew the two of them would never marry, and that was alright with him, they were mates, and for someone like Viktor that had more value than any paper or word. It was the same for Logan and Marie, sitting not far from there.
Logan was actually pouting, as several children seemed to be very interested in climbing all over him. He'd have walked away, but he wasn't about to move away from his mate, not when she had their baby in his arms. The feral still had no idea how he was supposed to be a father to that little boy, but Marie was convinced he'd be a wonderful one, and in the month since little Jamie had been born he'd managed not to drop him even once… so perhaps that was as good a start as any.
Nina was talking to Irene, the two of them worked in the political world sometimes, doing what they could to improve working and living conditions for all gifted. Raven watched over them, politics were boring to her, for the most part, the kind of thing she only got involved with when she definitely had to (she was a woman of action damn it!) but she'd endure the talk of it to stay close to her match. And to think there was a time when she almost let all of it go… thankfully she wasn't stupid enough to actually do it in the end.
Jane and Thor were on a blanket, doing their best to feed their two little monsters: Svein Erik and David Lucas, each looked completely opposite of each other (Svein looked like a mini-Thor in everything except the fact that while he was quite tall, he was slimmer; David for his part had his mother's looks and body-build except for his broad back and shoulder, which he definitely inherited from his father). Only two boys for the time being, though Jane held hope that the next one would be a little girl, their Astrid…
Sachiko seemed to be the last to arrive to their little gathering, not surprising considering all her responsibilities as the Master of the NY Sanctum. But they'd convinced her to take a break, and of course Karl was with her, as always.
They all quieted down when they heard Nightingale begin singing, and then Loki was singing with her. They knew it wouldn't be long before more voices joined the melody. Really, music was such an intrinsic part of their family (by blood or not), it seemed to be in their very souls…
xXx
Rose took a deep breath as she woke and sat up in bed. She wasn't panting, or sweating. The vision hadn't been a bad one, despite how some of her old lives had ended, because the current one, despite the hard moments, the grief, the pain… it held so much promise for the future. The children she'd seen, and the babies still on the way! It had been such the picture-perfect for the family… She was so wired up she couldn't stay in bed any longer, so she got up, half-absently putting Pietro's shirt on (it was a bit big on her, but she didn't mind) when she failed to locate her own clothes. She went to stand by the huge window their room in the tower had, didn't even notice it when she began singing:
"In this world you tried
Not leaving me alone behind
There's no other way
I prayed to the gods let him stay"
"The memories ease the pain inside
Now I know why"
"All of my memories keep you near
In silent moments imagine you here
All of my memories keep you near
Your silent whispers, silent tears"
She didn't quite notice when her soul woke up, but she did when he went to stand beside her. She didn't stop her singing though, instead she shifted her body just enough to rest against his broad, bare chest (he was wearing boxers, though). That was enough for the moment as her song went on:
"Made me promise I'd try
To find my way back in this life
I hope there is a way
To give me a sign you're ok"
"Reminds me again it's worth it all
So I can go on"
"All of my memories keep you near
In silent moments imagine you here
All of my memories keep you near
Your silent whispers, silent tears"
It was a nice moment for the both of them, the first time in quite a while that her songs weren't charged with anxiety, sadness, or other negative emotion. In that moment all she felt was peace. Even if it was true that perfection couldn't last forever, they'd enjoy while it did, and they'd be later the next time something came their way. They'd always be ready, and never give up, they had faith.
"Together in all these memories
I see your smile
All the memories I hold dear
Darling, you know I love you
Till the end of time"
"All of my memories keep you near
In silent moments imagine you here
All of my memories keep you near
Your silent whispers, silent tears"
"All of my memories..."
Neither of them said a word for almost a full minute, simply basking in the other's presence, in their love, their bond; eventually it was Pietro who broke the silence, and with words she could have never, in a million years, expected to hear from him:
"I saw it too." He announced quietly.
"What…?!" She knew what he meant, instinctively, she didn't want to though; then again, she should have known, they were bonded after all.
"All of it." He clarified. "From the very beginning to the snippets of what's to come. All of our lives, together and apart. I saw it. I didn't understand a lot of it, but I saw it..."
She took a breath, held it almost long enough to feel her lungs burn with it, then let it out slowly.
"I don't think that's right." She finally whispered.
"Why? Because I'm not a Seer like you?" He wanted to know.
"No, it's not about that. You saw it because I did, because we're a match. To be honest, I don't think I should have seen it either." She shook her head, sighing. "I think… it wasn't supposed to be this way. I mean, the way I kept seeing things when all other precogs went blind? That was just the final straw, but I've suspected it for a while."
He didn't say a word, waiting for her to get her thoughts in order.
"I don't think I was ever supposed to be a Seer." She finally admitted. "But it's… it's like the chaos. It's in my nature, in my very soul. And now… now I have so much power. I need only wish it and I could access any point in time, past, present or future. There will be no secrets for me if I don't wish it. And how is that right? I shouldn't have this kind of power, no one should."
She'd once kept a girl from discovering her true potential when she was supposed to… and that hadn't turned out so bad. In the end Rose herself had been the reason she discovered it. But that did not mean she could just change people's destinies at her leisure. It wasn't right.
"I think… I'm going to seal that part of me. It's not right that I know everything that's to come, that anyone does. If some day a danger comes that I need the power, it will still be there. And I'm sure if I'm truly meant to see something, the Norns, or Éru himself will make sure I do. Until then, I'd rather be just… me." That would be enough for a while, for lifetimes even.
He didn't ask her if she was sure, he wasn't the kind to ask stupid questions.
"Will we forget what we've seen tonight?" That he did want to know.
"Maybe, most of it." She admitted. "If we're meant to remember, I'm sure we will."
They weren't Helena and Stephen, they weren't meant to know what had happened in every single one of their lives (they were quite sure even those two didn't always like knowing all the things they did about some of those lives).
Nothing more was said. Pietro simply took Rose's hand in his and lead her back to the bed.
"Ves'tacha." He whispered before kissing her hair.
"Neshama." She replied just as quietly, kissing his pulse-point.
They went to sleep like that, in each other's arms.
Pietro never asked her what she would do, and it's not like Rose could have explained it anyway. It wasn't knowledge, not really, just an instinct. She made the choice and it was like flipping a switch on a metaphysical level. When she woke up, she'd no longer be a Seer, and that was alright. It was her choice, it was their choice, and that's how it was supposed to be.
It'd be a very different world come morning…
For those wondering, my version of the Arthurian legend follows a mix of the King Arthur movies from 2017 and 2004, with the Mordred from the Merlin series (and only Mordred!). Some might remember the Arthurian legend had been mentioned before as it was implied that Stephen is, in fact, Merlin's reincarnation, Helena is the Lady of the Lake (the one who helped Merlin rather than try and kill him and Arthur), and the Ancient One was in fact Queen Guinevere (she was a celt!) who chose to sacrifice her rest and stay away from her match to try and keep his people safe longer, until a moment came when she just didn't know how to step back and let someone handle it (hence end up doing it for hundreds of years).
Next week we'll have the finale, what happened after the battle and a better idea of how they all will make it to where you've already seen them in the last part of Rose's little vision. Also, if anyone's interested I'm more than willing to explain the reason for each chapter title?
See ya next week!