[EDIT/REVISION: Revised on 4/08/2011]
JULY 29TH, 12:03 AM:
"Ryuzaki?"
L groaned. "Light-kun, would you shut up?" L was starting to lose his vast amount of patience.
"But why—"
"Shut. Up. Light," L growled, dropping the honorifics. "You have been talking non-stop for the past two hours. I am trying to work."
Light whimpered. "But Ryuzaki, that horror movie scared me! ! !"
L's eyes narrowed. "Well, Light was the one who decided to watch it, wasn't he?" he nearly snarled through clenched teeth.
"Yes, but—"
"Then stop complaining!"
Soichiro, Matsuda, Mogi, and Aizawa looked up, surprised at L raising his voice. Normally, they wouldn't be in HQ this late, but seeing as how the contest seemed bound to end very soon, they all decided to stay there so that the results would be recorded accurately.
Light had idiotically watched a bunch of the scariest horror movies he could find. And now he was freaking out about them. "Hmph…" Light said, "I'm going to go do something."
He took out a camera and started taking pictures of everything. Ryuzaki, afraid that Light would take a picture of him, freaked out.
"Put that camera away!" L commanded.
"But I don't wanna…" Light argued, his mouth feeling heavy, causing him to slur his words.
"It doesn't matter if you don't want to!" He made a move to take away the camera from Light.
"NOOOOOO! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" Light shrieked at the top of his lungs. "DON'T TAKE AWAY MY CAMERA! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" He bit L's hand and didn't let go.
L shouted out a string of profanities, then, "KIRA! IM BEING BITTEN BY KIRA!"
The rest of the task force just stared in shock, making no move to help.
"Let go of me! ! ! ! Or I'll have Watari shoot Light-kun with his sniper!" L threatened. His hand throbbed.
Light mumbled something that sounded a lot like "mmm crunchy."
L continued shouting his threats. "—and then I'll kill Light-kun! I swear, I'll kill Light-kun! I'll…I'll EAT Light-kun! And then I'll arrest Light-kun's bones! And then—"
Watari, with a blank face that made it totally unobvious that he was holding back laughter, plied Light's mouth off of L with a metal object. (Lol, Watari always randomly comes out of nowhere)
L, finally freed, examined the bite marks on his hand closely. It almost looked like he was pouting. While Light was preoccupied with being angry at Watari, L stepped on his camera, squashing it. Light screamed.
JULY 29TH, 4:05 AM:
L was tired. He didn't totally want to admit it to anybody, but he was. And Light was driving him up the wall. An attempt at beating me because he's Kira? L thought absentmindedly.
Not to mention that every few minutes, Matsuda would come up to him and ask if he was alright, and if he wanted more coffee, and if he felt sleepy. L would respectively answer "yes, no, and no," which would cause Matsuda to apologize and giggle timidly. It was a very predictable pattern. Apparently, Matsuda really didn't want to lose $500.
"Ryuzaki, are you alright?" Matsuda asked for the umpteenth time. L was too tired to count every time he asked.
"Yes, I'm fine, Matsuda," L said, annoyed.
"Would you like me to get you more coffee?"
"…No thank you, Matsuda. My answer is the same as it was approximately four minutes ago. As you can see—also very much like approximately four minutes ago—my coffee cup is full."
"Do you feel sleepy?"
L's eye twitched. "As I said, I am fine, Matsuda. This answer also hasn't changed in the four-minute time gap, and all of the other times you asked me these same questions."
"Oh, sorry," Matsuda laughed nervously, also as predicted.
L turned back to his work. Light had taken a caffeine pill and had actually almost fully regained his regular sanity. He was working, also. Though he wasn't concentrating very well.
"I feel like dying…" Light complained for the sixth time. "I'm so tired…"
"Then go crawl under a rock and do it…" L muttered under his breath. He had almost completely abandoned all the patience of which he once had so much.
Light heard it. "That was mean, Ryuzaki."
L rolled his eyes.
JULY 29TH, 7:09 AM:
L looked at Matsuda angrily. "Matsuda. What time does it say on my computer's clock?"
Matsuda leaned over his shoulder and said, "it says '7:06.' Why?"
L clenched his teeth purposefully. "Look at the wall clock. The one that you set. What time does it say?"
Matsuda looked at the clock on the wall. "It says '7:09'. What are you getting at?"
L exploded. "WHAT IM GETTING AT IS THAT YOU SET THE CLOCK THREE MINUTES OFF FROM WHAT TIME IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE! ARE YOU TOO STUPID TO FIGURE EVEN THIS OUT? !"
Matsuda shrank back. "Uh…sorry…?" he asked timidly.
L snarled at him and spat, "get out of here. I don't want to see your face until I've calmed down."
Everyone stared at L, too afraid of him at the moment to do anything about his anger management problem. Except Light.
"Uh…Ryuzaki? Don't you think you're being a bit too harsh on him?"
L whirled around in his chair to glare at Light. "Does Light-kun wish to argue with my reasoning?" Before Light could even open his mouth to answer, L continued to rant. "You see, Light-kun, this is a top-secret headquarters. It is being used by me, L, and the people working on the Kira case. We have millions of dollars at our disposal, and all the newest technology to make solving this case as convenient as possible. AND THE CLOCK ON THE WALL ISN'T EVEN SET AT THE RIGHT TIME? !"
"But it's only off by three min—" Light started, only to get interrupted.
"THREE MINUTES IS A LOT OF TIME! ! ! !"
Light decided that he should keep his mouth shut.
L then turned to Soichiro. "Oh, and Yagami-san…"
"Yes, L?" Soichiro asked nervously.
L held up his bitten hand. "I'm going to test your son for rabies."
JULY 29TH, 2:26 PM:
L had been mean to everyone in the task force all day. Having to deal with Light and his sleep deprivation had caused L to get tired much faster than he normally would. Had he not had to deal with Light, he would have been able to stay up for three days without blowing up at people.
Light was just thankful that he was no longer handcuffed to the man.
Watari came into the room. "Excuse me, Ryuzaki…"
"What is it?" L asked, his eyes narrowed.
"Today was the day you were scheduled to speak with the children at Wammy's…to answer questions?" Watari informed nervously.
"Fine. Hand me my laptop."
Watari did so. L switched on the "L" picture and the "L" voice modifier. He called the orphanage. On his laptop, he could see a bunch of intelligent orphans staring excitedly at the computer that displayed the letter "L."
"Hello, children," L began. "This is L. I am going to be answering any questions you might have."
One child asked, "What made you want to be a detective?"
L answered, "What kind of a question is that? I liked solving cases, duh."
Another child asked, "How do you choose which cases to take and which ones to leave to the police?"
"Well, basically, I decide which cases seem too hard for the stupid police, who always take ages to solve a case. I mean, seriously! And then those are the ones I take. And I leave all the simple ones to the cops, who then act as if the case is super difficult, and then go on with their lives after they decide they can't solve it and leave it unsolved," L explained, his patience still very thin. He was probably scaring these kids.
"Have you ever killed someone?" another child asked.
"Single handedly? No. Probably not. But sometimes, I really wish I would. Like, you see, there's this person I suspect right now, and I would love nothing more than to wring his neck!"
Yep, he was definitely scaring the children…
"What are you afraid of?" a girl asked.
A boy said to her, "you idiot, L isn't afraid of anything! You're so stupid!"
L got annoyed at the boy. "Boy," he began, "her question is fine. How do you know I'm not afraid of anything? You don't know me! How do you know I'm not afraid of cows, or rubber bands, or clocks? ! YOU DON'T! Not that I am afraid of those things, but still. So stop acting like you know me you fat idiot!"
The frightened child was silent.
"I happen to be afraid of Kira germs!" L shouted.
L started pounding on the keyboard. "I HATE KIRA!"
Watari pulled L away from the computer. The children had horror-stricken looks on their faces. Watari said into the mic, "I'm sorry. That was Matsuda, a member of the task force at the moment. His hobby is scaring orphaned children. L is currently unavailable at the moment. Perhaps we can reschedule this appointment?"
Well, what do you think? It was actually hard to make L be mean to those poor orphans D:
Lol, L finally loses his patience. I've always wondered if that could happen. ^ ^ Review! Please! –gets down on knees and begs- -gives puppy dog eyes ;~;-
Oh yeah! Btw! Did any of you notice that Matsuda had actually set the wall clock to the correct time, and it was in fact L's computer clock that was slow? –w- Lol.