PART 4
Laurie
What is your best quality?
My talent for maintaining serenity and peace in the face of a chaotic, meat-eating world.
Faves? (music, color, movie, food)
• Nature Sounds
• Rainbow (yes, I'm LGBT; plus, it's the color of my Rasta)
• Under Size Me
• Veggie burger with sweet potato fries
Describe your favorite country.
I'm not really sure. They're all really wonderful, with their diverse cultures and authentic vegan foods. But one I especially love is the Philippines. It's a beautiful, agricultural nation, with more rural land than urban land. I know that parts of it are ridden with poverty, but I'd like to try to help them with this race's prize money.
Best travel so far?
Vietnam was amazing. Their water puppet shows were unlike anything I've ever seen before, and I enjoyed the shopping districts, too.
Worst travel so far?
A burger restaurant somewhere in New Jersey. I asked for a veggie burger, and the confused staff got it mixed up with a beef burger. As soon as I realized it was real meat, I nearly screamed!
What is your lifelong to-do list?
I want to save the animal kingdom from extinction, become a hero for my intended causes, and avoid eating non-vegan food for the rest of my life.
If you could switch places with someone?
Beyoncé has such a good, passionate singing voice. I'd love to sing like her.
Your biggest challenge on the Race with your partner?
Miles is my best friend in the world, and in some ways she's a much wiser person than I am, but sometimes she rubs it in my face a little bit. She needs to accept that we're not all as perfect as she thinks we should be. I only hope that it doesn't interfere with our running on the Race.
Where would you most like to visit, and why?
Pretty much anywhere I haven't been before! I love to travel and will visit anyplace if given the opportunity to do so! The only place I'd never go is North Korea.
What would you do if you won the million dollars?
I would donate all of my share to our favorite causes, such as: Save the Hunchback Walrus, Goat-co Eco Warriors, and People for the Ethical Treatment of Ants, among others. I'm pretty sure Miles would do the same.
Leonard
What is your best quality?
I can see the fantastic fantasy world better than anybody else I know, although my friend Tammy is more or less my equal in that guild!
Faves? (music, color, movie, food)
• The Lord of the Kings soundtrack
• Gray and green
• The Lord of the Kings
• Roast lamb, or mutton, as I call it
Describe your favorite country.
New Zealand. It was the best possible country to film The Lord of the Kings films, given how much modern development has been done to England and Europe. It looks like a pure doppelgänger for Center-earth!
Best travel so far?
Norway. It's the only place where people seem to take my magic seriously!
Worst travel so far?
One day, when I tried to use my Chaos Barrier spell in a decathlon in Vancouver, I was tied up and thrown into the sewer system, and I was told to stay there and rot in my own charlatanry. Fortunately, one of the workmen in the sewers found me and freed me, and made sure I could take a shower before seeing anybody else.
What is your lifelong to-do list?
I want to look for the biggest Live Action Role Playing game I can find, and combat and defeat the dark enemy and come out as the big hero. I also want to ensure that Dragon's Coins are used as real currency.
If you could trade places with someone?
I'd switch places with Taruman, from The Lord of the Kings. I want to be as wise and great as he was, only without the evil corruption that damned his essence.
Your biggest challenge on the Race with your partner?
Tammy is a very decent girl; I don't have to worry about her letting me down. But I hope she's as good as I am at getting our spells right. She must be; she's never let me down before!
Where would you most like to visit, and why?
I wanna go to Norway and try my hand at equaling the magical power of the ancient gods of Norse legend, especially Odin, Thor, and maybe Loki, too.
What would you do if you won the million dollars?
I'd convert it into Dragon Coins, and use it to build a realm somewhere much like Ultima Online. It's a place full of magic, monsters, medieval-like buildings, and virtues.
Lorenzo
What is your best quality?
The fact that I'm quicker, smarter, and handsomer than my jerk of a stepbrother, Chet.
Faves? (music, color, movie, food)
• Rock 'n roll
• The color of snot
• Ninja Gals 5
• Pepperoni pizza
Describe your favorite country.
Who needs a favorite country, when you can just stay home and stick to what you know best? I don't have the time to get on a dozen planes and kabitz with some foreign weirdos!
Best travel so far?
I only travel as far as the local arcade and the grocery store with my Mom, dude.
Worst travel so far?
I told you, I don't travel, man; but my least favorite place in the world is Chet's family's home, the home of the in-laws.
What is your lifelong to-do list?
Win a high score at Immortal Kombat, read all the Captain Canada comics, and bury Chet in a hole so deep he won't know which way is up.
If you could switch places with someone?
Nobody. I'm too cool to care about being someone else, man!
Your biggest challenge on the Race with your partner?
I'm gonna be ahead of Chet the whole way, and he'd better not trip me from behind!
Where would you most like to go, and why?
If I had to travel, I'd say Great Britain. Good food, good pubs, and I don't have too much of a language barrier.
What would you do if you won the million dollars?
Buy all the monster and ninja DVDs and video games in existence, and binge watch/play them in my room.
MacArthur
What is your best quality?
I'm a tough-as-nails soon-to-be cop, with the biggest and strongest glutes you've ever seen on a young woman! And I'm not afraid to break a few rules!
Faves? (music, color, movie, food)
• 90210 Cop
• Blue-collar blue
• Crazy Cop
• Well-done steak
Describe your favorite country.
Any country in Europe. They've got tough, macho cops there, whom I hear are even more rough around the edges than some North American cops. Not so much Asia or the Middle East; the police there are like blindly obedient maniacs!
Best travel so far?
I was fairly impressed by the professionalism of the police force down in Argentina, when I saw them bust a ring of drugs dealers during a vacation.
Worst travel so far?
Well, once I pushed my authority too far when I took a wrong turn in Alberta and defied a local cop who thought someone like me didn't deserve to own a driver's license. MAN, I'LL SHOW HIM YET!
What is your lifelong to-do list?
Become the most macho policewoman in southern Canada, arrest lots of tough guys (and ladies) and show them I'm stronger and smarter, and of course, become Chief of Police.
If you could switch places with someone?
Why not Dirty Larry? He always gets away with shooting first and asking questions later! Or, maybe, Matt Cordell, 'cause he's an un-killable zombie cop.
Your biggest challenge on the Race with your partner?
Sanders is an excellent partner, only I wish sometimes that she'd loosen up a little and have more fun. I have a bad feeling she's going to treat this Race as seriously as a Homicide case. If we can last long enough, though, I bet I can convince her to lighten up.
Where would you most like to visit, and why?
South Africa, or maybe Botswana. I've always wanted to go on a hunting safari and gain glory for my trophies, just like Teddy Roosevelt and the so-called "great white hunters."
What would you do if you won the million dollars?
Get some hunting equipment from Cabela's and a hunting lodge, plus the tools and chemicals for taxidermy, and use it all to treasure my hunting kills. Who knows? Maybe I'll even use it to keep some souvenirs from criminals if I can sneak it out of the evidence locker.
Mary
What is your best quality?
I know enough about navigation that I can find my way through any city, village, or even rural territory, no matter how complicated.
Faves? (music, color, movie, food)
• Epic, theatrical
• Fiery red
• Good Will Fishing
• Carp, or salmon, or maybe trout
Describe your favorite country.
South Korea, or maybe its long-time animosity, Japan. These nations have such genius and enthusiasm for designing and building advanced technology, and because their cultural beliefs are different from those of America and Canada, they're not afraid of what they are doing with Artificial Intelligence in modern robots and androids.
Best travel so far?
I've seen the old Greek ruins where they say the Ancient Greek gods once dwelt with the other characters from Greek mythology. While I don't take the Parthenon of Greece very seriously, it's nonetheless a very fascinating subject.
Worst travel so far?
I was never more bored than when somebody brought me to a children's magic museum in Portland, Oregon, thinking I might be interested in how little kids like to see and learn about the wonders of magic and the world. Come on! Science is not child's play, it's for grown-ups!
What is your lifelong to-do list?
I have a lot of goals in mind, like to build the first perfect A.I. gynoid (peaceful, not warlike, and not a sex object, either), stay pale, play a hybrid of two or more popular musical instruments, and learn in detail all about how Industrial Light & Magic made all their fantastic special effects.
If you could switch places with someone?
Eleanor Roosevelt did a lot for women's rights, and was one of America's greatest First Ladies. I wish I were as famous and proud as she was.
Your biggest challenge on the Race with your partner?
Ellody is VERY talkative. I talk a lot too, but she talks even when it would distract us from an important task. She's also worse than I am at improvisation if our planned data is lost or it fails us.
Where would you most like to visit, and why?
Ellody once said she'd like to go to the Galápagos Islands. I share her sentiment. It is one of best places to go to study science, and it's also a great place to have some fun on the beaches.
What would you do if you won the million dollars?
Well, like Ellody, I'd donate a lot of it to underfunded astrophysics. But I also want to use some to get a good education at the University of Toronto. How can I become a scientist without a college education, after all?
Mickey
What is your best quality?
I'm lucky that, despite all my health issues and allergies, some of them have made me immune to the negative effects of other harsh things, like extreme heat or cold, or insect bites.
Faves? (music, color, movie, food)
• Fight Song by Rachel Platten
• Chlorophyll green (it's gentlest on my eyes)
• The Bobbit: A Long-Expected Journey
• Soy cheese pizza
Describe your favorite country.
I almost agree with my brother, Jay, on Switzerland, but heights give me nosebleeds, and that country has some darned high mountains! I think my favorite is… Liechtenstein. Why? One sentence… It's small, and it's unnoticeable, making it a perfect place to hide from the crowds!
Best travel so far?
My family and I went for a road trip in the U.S. state named Kansas. It was WONDERFUL. Beautiful scenery, flat land, a comfortable car, and no tornados in the forecast.
Worst travel so far?
Yellowstone National Park was beyond terrifying. Wild animals with strange smells, high altitudes that gave me a nosebleed, and geysers which are a sign that the earth beneath the geysers will explode like all the world's nuclear weapons concentrated in just one place. YYAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! MOMMY!
What is your lifelong to-do list?
Live from one day to the next and concentrate on survival, and…not much else, really.
If you could trade places with someone?
Anybody in the world. I wish I were anybody but poor, little me!
Your biggest challenge on the Race with your partner?
Jay and I get along pretty well, and he's the only thing that keeps me going in the face of all the chaos in the world. He and I don't fight much. That's a blessed relief!
Where would you most like to visit, and why?
I'm not sure. I'd have to do a lot of research to see which countries are both most interesting and safest to visit. But if I had to choose now, maybe Iceland. No! That's got lots of volcanic activity, too! Maybe, Ireland instead. No, no! I'm allergic to clovers, even four-leafed ones, and I'm afraid of leprechauns! Oh, I don't know! Can't I just abstain from this question?
What would you do if you won the million dollars?
I'd buy an underground bunker with plenty of home comforts and fun games, and take shelter from the mayhem of the world for the rest of my life. Except, I don't think my parents would let me do that.