When asked what she'd do with Regina if she got to spend the day with her, Lana said she'd probably take her for a night out on the town and do tequila shots. Obviously, I couldn't let that go without writing a fic about Regina having a few too many tequila shots.
This is set right after Emma returns to Storybrooke, before Henry and the others get their memories back.
Enjoy!
xoxo
"I knew I'd find you here," a voice says from behind her, and she scowls.
"I don't want to talk to you… or anyone for that matter," Regina replies, but Tinkerbell is persistent and instead of leaving, she sits next to her on the tree trunk, her face sympathetic.
"You really do love him, don't you?" she asks her.
"Of course I do, he's my son," Regina replies, and her voice breaks a little at the end. Henry has no memory of her, and despite all the pain and misery she's suffered over the years, nothing has ever hurt as much as seeing him stare blankly at her and introduce himself, as if Regina was just some acquaintance of Emma's instead of the woman who raised him, who loved him since the moment he came into her life, who gave up everything she knew to make him happy.
"You know if I had a way to make him remember, I would, right?" Tinkerbell ventures.
"Why would you even care about helping me, even if you could? I ruined your life," Regina fires back.
"Yes, but you didn't really mean to, you were just scared, and I understand that now, after seeing how much you've gone through. As for wanting to help you, well, I guess it's what friends do."
"Oh, so we're friends now?" Regina asks bitterly, finally turning to look at her.
"I'm afraid so. Such a terrible fate, but what can you do?" Tinkerbell shrugs, grinning a little at her, and Regina feels the corners of her mouth twitch a bit, but refuses to smile back.
"Well, friend, I just want to be alone, so go away," she murmurs, her tone isn't unkind, but it is final.
"Actually, I have a better idea," Tinkerbell replies mischievously.
"What are you talking about?"
"You need to let loose, Regina, you need to just enjoy yourself for a while. You can transport us with your magic, let's go somewhere!"
"Where?"
"I don't know, a fancy party, an exotic landmark, anywhere you want, let's just leave Storybrooke for a bit, this realm is so large! We might as well explore it."
"I don't want to go anywhere," Regina says.
"It doesn't do you any good to just sit here in the middle of the woods and cry, Regina. Come on, let's just go somewhere and have a drink," Tinkerbell says, and the excitement in her voice makes the whole thing begin to sound tempting to the queen, who raises an eyebrow at her.
"Anywhere?" she asks.
"Anywhere," the fairy answers with a wink, knowing she has her.
"Fine," Regina huffs, "but just one drink," she says.
"Of course," is Tinkerbell's amused reply.
In an instant, purple smoke surrounds them, and before she knows it, Tinkerbell finds herself standing next to Regina on pavement that wasn't there before, staring up at the entrance to some establishment from which music is blaring.
"Where are we?" she asks.
"Boston," Regina replies.
"That doesn't seem very exciting," Tinkerbell asks with a frown.
"You said anywhere."
"Fine, alright, let's go have a drink," the fairy replies, not wanting to make Regina take them back to Storybrooke just yet.
They walk inside and directly to the bar, where they take a seat in the stools and wait for the bartender to show up. He's handsome, with dark hair that falls above hazel eyes and a strong jaw lined with a bit of scruff. He's wearing a tight black T-shirt that showcases his well-defined arms, a short black apron tied around his waist over his jeans. When he sees them, he throws a lazy grin their way and stares at them appraisingly.
"Never seen you gorgeous creatures here before, what can I get you?" he asks, his voice a seductive baritone.
"Apple martini for me, and for her—" Regina begins, but Tinkerbell shuts her off, leaning forward on the bar and giving the man a cheeky smirk.
"Two shots of tequila, please," she says, and he nods at her, grin still in place as he goes to fetch her order. Regina turns to look at her.
"Tequila? Really?" she asks.
"Emma introduced me to it, I'm afraid I've become quite fond of it," Tinkerbell says, smiling at the queen. Regina scowls a little at the mention of Emma, but turns back to the bartender, who has just shown up in front of her, holding three shot glasses in one hand and a bottle of tequila in the other.
"Here we go, ladies, hope you don't mind me joining you," he says as he pours the shots, then brings a small salt shaker and places it in front of them, along with three lime wedges. Regina goes to take the salt shaker from him, but instead, he moves it away from her reach and shakes some salt into his hand, right in the L-shaped area between his thumb and index finger, and then offers his hand to her.
"Go on, beautiful," he says to her, and Regina flinches away in indignation.
"What makes you think I'm going to lick your hand? That is highly unsanitary," she says in disgust, and Tinkerbell laughs.
"Oh come on! Lighten up!" she says. The handsome bartender merely smiles, his eyes never leaving Regina's as he licks the salt from his hand before he downs the shot and lets Tinkerbell place a lime wedge in his mouth.
"Maybe the next one, then," he says when he discards the lime, and walks away to tend to other customers.
"I think he likes you," Tinkerbell says knowingly, smirking at her. Regina huffs and drinks her tequila straight up, the salt and lime left intact on the counter in front of her.
"What are you doing?" the fairy asks when she sees Regina pulling out some money from her wallet.
"We agreed on one drink, we've had our one drink, now we go back," the queen says, but Tinkerbell stops her.
"Let's have another."
"No."
"The idea of this was for you to relax, you're not relaxed. Come on, one more," Tink insists, and before Regina can protest, the bartender has refilled her shot glass.
"Listen to your friend, you look like you could use some time off from… whatever it is that's plaguing you," he says, and she notices that his tone has softened, no longer intending to seduce, just a friendly observation. Regina exhales and grabs the shot glass, looking at Tinkerbell with wary eyes.
"I am so going to regret this," she says before downing the second shot.
Nine shots later, Regina is laughing, letting the bartender -whose name she now knows to be Ryan- pour some salt on her hand.
"Are you sure? Isn't it 'highly unsanitary' for you to do this?" he asks with a knowing smirk, and she glares at him playfully, offering him her hand.
"Do it," she says, her eyes dancing. Ryan smiles, and then licks the salt from her hand, wiggling his eyebrows at her when she giggles at the sensation of his tongue on her skin before drinking the shot of tequila she just bought him. Tinkerbell is giggling as she watches them.
Two more shots after that, and Ryan is holding her by the waist from behind as they dance during his break from manning the bar. Tinkerbell is on her stool, watching and swaying to the music with a lazy smile on her face, happy to see the great and terrible Evil Queen allow herself to just be a carefree woman for a change. Regina feels exhilarated, never having been with a man like this. The dancing was sensual, slow and intense even as the music thumped and picked up speed. There was no hurry in his movements, and his hands grasped her tightly against him, her back against his chest and his cheek resting next to hers, his breath ghosting the side of her face. She revels in the physical connection, something easy and safe and fun, her head leaning back on his shoulder as she breathes him in. His scent is not at all unpleasant, but it's not what she's looking for. Though what exactly it is that she's looking for, she has no idea.
After one last shot, Regina announces it's time to leave, and a sleepy Tinkerbell doesn't really have it in her to argue, grinning at Ryan and thanking him for a lovely time. He smiles in return and catches Regina's hand after she shrugs her coat on.
"Will I see you again?" he asks, and Tinkerbell giggles and hiccups as she leans into Regina's side, Ryan merely grins at her.
"I'm afraid not," she says with a smile, "but we had a very nice time," she finishes. That easy smile of his never leaves his face even as he takes her hand in his and kisses it.
"I don't even know your name," he says.
"It's R—" Tinkerbell starts, but Regina quickly moves the arm she has around the fairy and clamps her hand on her mouth.
"It's better that way," she says to Ryan, removing her other hand from his grip while smiling at him, and he nods in understanding.
"Should I call you a cab?" he asks.
"Oh, that won't be necessary, we, uh… someone's picking us up in a few minutes," Regina lies, and he nods again, winking at her and blowing a kiss at Tink before he walks back inside the bar.
"He is so pretty," Tinkerbell says with a sigh, and Regina can't help but laugh at her.
"And you are so drunk," she replies.
"So are you!" Tink accuses when she sees Regina stumble as she walks, "this was really fun."
"It was," Regina admits, giggling at the fairy's attempts at walking in a straight line, though it doesn't escape her notice that she can't do it either.
Giggling and laughing like schoolgirls, they spin around in purple smoke when Regina's sure no one can see them, and in seconds, they're back in Storybrooke, right in the middle of Main Street, the clock tower looming above them.
"I thought we were going to the Rabbit Hole?" Tinkerbell asks in confusion.
"I guess I just… got lost," Regina says, and after a second of looking at each other, they burst out laughing, holding on to each other as they walk to the town bar, making quite a spectacle of themselves as they stumble in, demanding tequila in loud voices, much to the surprise of the people there. Killian, who is sipping some rum with another man at the counter, sees them and beckons them over.
"I see you ladies decided to have an adventure tonight," he quips.
"Oh, like you've never done it before," Tinkerbell says, waving him off. Killian smiles at the fairy, then takes her hand.
"I think you should go get some sleep," he says when he realizes she is giggling with her eyes closed.
"Noooooooo, tequila!" Tinkerbell replies, and Regina laughs from where she stands behind her, shouting "yes, tequila!" in agreement. Killian chuckles at them.
"You too should get some rest, your majesty, I sense this tequila won't be so kind to you in the morning," he says, and Regina nods solemnly, though a snort breaks through her and suddenly she's laughing again.
"You take her, I'll see to Regina," a voice says from behind them, and Regina realizes that Killian's companion was none other than Robin Hood.
"You'll 'see to me'? How darrrre you? I am your queeeeeen!" she slurs, though she can't contain her laughter. Robin can't help but smirk at her, finding her drunkenness utterly endearing.
"Come on, your majesty, don't want to give your subjects a show," he says, gesturing for her to walk ahead of him while Killian lifts an already asleep Tinkerbell into his arms.
"I'll take her to Swan's room at Granny's, she can spend the night there," the pirate tells Robin, who nods in agreement and then catches up to Regina, who is already stumbling out the door. He puts a hand on the small of her back to steady her as they walk to her house, hoping the fresh air will help her clear her head, but instead it seems to fuel her current state, making her skip around and hold on to a lamppost, walking in circles around it as she sings silly songs that don't make sense to him.
"We should really get you home," Robin interrupts her singing, offering his hand to her. She pouts, and it takes everything in him not to lean forward and catch that stuck-out bottom lip with his mouth.
"You're no fun, I want Tink back," she says in a way that would rival the pleas of any petulant child.
"Tinkerbell is asleep," he replies patiently.
"No she's not she's just resting her eyes, she told me so herself!" Regina insists, and Robin chuckles at her, his hands darting out to hold her waist when she trips over her own feet.
Slowly, they walk until they've rounded the corner of her street and reached her door, but Regina can't seem to even be able to get the key in the lock, so Robin does it for her and walks her up the stairs, leaving her in her bathroom to change while he goes down to fetch her some water.
When he returns to her room, it is to find her in her pajamas, half asleep on the bathroom floor with a lazy smile on her face as she leans back against the outer edge of her bathtub. Shaking his head in amusement, Robin sets the glass of water on her night table and then goes back to the bathroom, lifting her in his arms. Her head immediately falls against his chest, sighing in appreciation as she breathes him in. Ryan had smelled of smoke and cologne and hints of the tequila he'd drank with her, but Robin's scent was softer, less aggressive, more natural, like pine trees and rain and…
"You smell like forest," she says, giggling a little as she grabs his jacket tightly and burrows further into him, the woodsy smell of him soothing her. He chuckles at her observation as he sets her down on the bed, drawing the covers up to her waist before he helps her drink the water he procured for her.
When she's done, she turns on her stomach and lets her head drop back on the pillow, sighing contentedly as she closes her eyes, and her deep breathing alerts Robin to the fact that she's fallen asleep, her hand now grasping the hem of his jacket as he sits next to her on the bed. Quietly, he extricates himself from her, but the movement wakes her for a moment and she tightens her hold on his jacket, bringing him closer.
"No," she mumbles, "don't leave, I like the smell of forest," and Robin laughs quietly at her words.
"As you wish, milady," he murmurs back with a grin, moving to sit more comfortably on the bed next to her, running his fingers through her hair as he watches her drift off again, the happy hum his ministrations elicit from her sending a shudder through his entire body.
The next morning, Regina is awoken by sunlight. Retched, annoying sunlight that filters through her window and shines directly on her face, making her open her eyes and thus trigger the horrible headache tequila always causes her. She should've known better than to drink it, should've known better than to listen to Tinkerbell of all people. Her head is pounding, and the chirping of the birds outside only serves to annoy her further. She stretches out on her bed, moving around until her hand catches something that shouldn't be there. In a flash, memories from the previous night come to her, and she flinches as she remembers her pathetic display at the Rabbit Hole. Her fingers grasp the dark green jacket and she groans, remembering how Robin had had to open her door, walk her to her room and even carry her and tuck her into her own bed because she was too drunk to do so herself. Had she really told him he smelled like forest?! How embarrassing. This was not supposed to happen, all she'd wanted to do was escape from her pain for a little while, and she had ended up behaving like an idiot in front of the townspeople, in front of him.
As she brings the jacket closer to her, she finds a note poised on top of it. Squinting, she brings it closer to her face to read the elegant handwriting.
Keep it.
Regina stares at the note, smiling despite herself. She doesn't feel the headache anymore, merely wrapping herself up in Robin's jacket and letting his scent lull her back to sleep.
I know there wasn't much Outlaw Queen in this one but I wanted it to be more about Regina. I wanted something that was just about her letting go of everything for once, and I don't think she could've done that if Robin had been there making her all tingly and confused.
However, I intend to write another fic with this same prompt that includes a lot more interaction between Regina and Robin so fear not!
Let me know what you think of this one!
-B