As I walk down the abandoned halls, my footsteps and breathing are the only noises you can hear. My fingers play with the District 13 uniform pants.
More like rags.
But a girl from the Seam shouldn't expect much, even though I am a Victor. It doesn't change what I grew up with.
Walking closer and closer to the laboratory makes me feel sick, so I stop. I begin to hear weird grunts and groans, but I ignore the sounds.
What should you say, Katniss? That you finally figured out how to love him? Like he'll believe you, I say to myself, the hard reality causing me to cringe at each word.
It's true; he won't believe me.
He hates me, he wants me dead, he wants me out of his life.
But I want him back.
Snow took him away from me. Snow took my husband, and it's time I fight for Peeta.
You're finally figuring out this now?
I'm absolutely pathetic.
I walk at a faster pace, planning in my mind the speech I'm going to give to Peeta.
My breathing speeds up. I'm a step away from the little glass panel they keep open, just in case of an emergency.
"Peeta..?" I ask softly, hoping he won't start yelling at me.
I hear no response, just a snore.
He's asleep; just leave him, talk to him in the morning.
No. I'm not going to back down. No. I need to speak with him.. I need to.
I walk over and pull a chair up to the foot of the bed. I take a nice long breath and grab my rag like pants. I begin my speech, pouring out all the things that I have kept under wraps for so long, things I could never say to a conscious Peeta.
"Peeta, I know you're probably sleeping, but…I came tonight, because I need to tell you …I need to tell you I'm sorry," my voice is quiet, almost a whisper, "I'm sorry for the first Games, I'm sorry you…I'm sorry you fell in love with me. You really shouldn't have done that, it caused you a lot more trouble than you would have been in, you know. I'm sorry I got us into this mess.. How I got you hurt." My voice breaks at the end, but I keep going, "I know, if this happened to me, you would have a personal dinner with Snow.." I say, chuckling a bit.
My eyes relax on the sleeping boy in the hospital bed. How he would get up in the middle of the night just to check up on me. He never did anything because he wanted something, he did all of that because… because he cares. Even when you don't ask, he knows. It's like he can read minds. And my mind is the one he reads the easiest.
"Peeta.. I miss you," I say, practically choking it out of my mouth.
Sappy, even the old Peeta would laugh at that one.
I bite my lips, but before I could speak the sleeping boy got up and was facing me. His eyes look.. dead.
My body moved back a bit, my pulse was going through the roof, and my fingers clung onto the rickety chair.
His eyes flutter open slowly, drowsily. I pray a silent prayer that he has not heard me, yet part of his almost wants him to have heard.
He looks up at me, his eyes somewhat wild and his hair tousled from sleep, "Why are you saying this now?" He asks mistrustfully.
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, mentally preparing myself for the sentence I am about to say.
"Because I love you."