Chapter Four

New Magic

Part I

Macroeconomics wasn't a class that anyone liked, except for Amy. She loved it. That's why she was the only one sitting in the front row and paying complete attention to the drab middle aged professor next to the slide projector. The math made sense and the complexity kept her mind distracted from the weirdness that was her life right now.

The unfortunate thing about it was that class always ended at some point. So, when the professor wrapped up his lecture she gathered her notebook reluctantly and shoved it into her bag. Now, she would have to go back to the dorm room where Karma would be. Seeing Karma wasn't really on top of her list of wants right now. Something stupid might fly out of her mouth and she would feel even worse than she already did.

So, she started toward the dining hall to have an early dinner, though she'd probably be forced to go again when Karma wanted to eat. It wasn't far, just two buildings over. She walked through the sliding doors and surveyed the lines. The other advantage to eating early was avoiding the rush. Everything would be fresher and she wouldn't have to stand in line and listen to the idiots to be found among her fellow students talk about their boyfriends or how drunk they got at the last party.

She picked up a to-go bowl of chili and a small salad and made way to the register. After she swiped her student ID to pay, she found an empty table in the corner and sat down, pulling her water bottle out of her bag and sitting it next to her food. Last but not least, she gently lifted her copy of The Bell Jar out of her messenger bag and sat it down on the table to read.

After putting her earbuds in and pressing play, she was ready to eat. The chili was good. She almost doubted it was actually from a cafeteria. She took a swig of water to fend off the heat from the spices and flipped open the book. One paragraph in she noticed movement, casting a vague signal to her brain.

She looked up and jumped when someone sat down opposite her. Chili flew off the spoon and landed on her shirt, one bean sliding down and plopping back onto the table. "What the hell?"

"Amy, hi," Clarice said. With her hidden motives, Clarice could hardly care about the chili on Amy's shirt or the upset expression on Amy Raudenfeld's face. Amy who now sat across from her already seething and altogether uninterested in her sudden and unexpected company, she obviously wasn't in the mood to be placating adorable strangers but Clarice couldn't mind because her business was more important than social niceties like allowing complete strangers their own personal space and much needed solitude. There would be other days for niceties. Today was for life-changing events. Clarice felt it in her bones just sitting across from her. It was like she was almost vibrating internally, just humming to life in Amy's presence. She would explain if given time. But time was necessary and the time was now.

"Fuck," Amy muttered, taking a napkin up to her shirt and trying to swallow the chili that she no longer had any interest in, given her company.

"And, you're already mad," Clarice noted out loud.

"Go ahead, sit," Amy joked, trying not to look at her. "No, no need to ask, go ahead!"

Just then Amy caught sight of Karma entering the cafeteria through the automatic doors.

"DAMMIT!" She cursed loudly, throwing her fist down on the table and frightening Clarice who had just sat down.

"Are you okay?" Clarice asked.

"Not really, no," Amy said, trying to duck. Karma would find her. Karma always found her.

"Do you… Are you…" Clarice caught sight of Karma and noticed the way Amy ducked. "If you need some place to go we can make something up," Clarice said, resting her hand on top of Amy's and feeling as Amy flinched at her touch. She flinched but surprisingly, Amy didn't pull her hand away. Instead she simply left it there and fought off the urge since, in all their chance meetings, Clarice had only ever tried to be nice.

"Uh… Fine, sure," Amy relented. Clarice may be a weirdo but at least she could get her away from Karma for a little bit. Trying to hide from Karma Ashcroft was becoming a regular chore. "How do we?" Amy looked at Clarice with panic in her eyes as Karma approached. They had no time to invent a story. They'd have to wing it and hope it all worked out.

"Amy! Hi! I thought you'd be here," Karma said.

"Hello again," Clarice smiled sweetly. She hadn't realized but her hand was still resting pleasantly on top of Amy's, just sitting there as if it belonged.

"Ummm, hi," Karma said, judging her but trying not to. It seemed sort of audacious for Clarice to just be talking to her like they knew each other. But, since Karma was a friendly person, she really did want to know her. That is unless...

Amy saw where Karma's eyes were locked and she moved her hand away from Clarice's and tucked it nervously under the table trying to seem less suspect and more normal than she ever really could be. It was like she had been caught in something but it wasn't real. She didn't know Clarice and it hadn't been her who had grasped at Clarice's hand. Amy wished to know what Karma was thinking. Something in her had obviously been affected by that simple sight of Amy with some other girl at a table.

"You could've texted me, ya know. I was hungry too," Karma half-smiled. She was trying not to feel anger.

It wasn't lost on Clarice that she didn't get a very friendly hello from Amy's roommate. She took note of it and moved on. Watching these two was pretty enjoyable. They were like a couple only not. There was definitely something there and Clarice wanted to know everything.

"Sorry, I was busy. Clarice and I-"

"We have a project," Clarice said simply. Amy was jealous of how relaxed Clarice seemed. Nothing bothered her. Nothing scared her. She was sweet too. How the hell does she do that?! Amy thought.

"Oh…" Karma said. And there she goes, just talking like we're all friends… It was Karma thinking now and feeling jealous and almost scared at this new random closeness Amy obviously had with this strange girl. This girl who had been in their apartment. This girl who had even been in Amy's room. Clarice and I? Since when did this start?!

"Microeconomics!" Amy exclaimed. It was enough to clue Clarice in and create a believable backstory.

"You're in that class too?" Karma asked. She was suspicious of it but she tried to act hopeful. It seemed like a set-up or something more. And why had they been touching?! That was all Karma could think.

"Yeah, at least for now... I might drop," Clarice laughed. She tucked her fingers behind her ear like she used to. Clarice still wasn't used to being without her long blonde hair. She had just cut it a month ago and she was still falling into her old habits of wanting to touch at it and tug. It was half the reason she cut it off. People treated her differently now, they thought of her differently. They didn't expect her to be a certain way and there had been things she was trying to ward off, like the way the boys used to stare or the way other girls seemed to loathe her before she even spoke. Not that Karma and Amy were really treating her any different now but at least now it had nothing to do with her hair and all to do with her attitude and her certain way of butting into their lives unannounced and demanding a minute of their time just to talk, just a minute.

"Oh…" Karma said again, thrown aback. First Amy didn't text. Now Amy was with this girl again. And they had been… Touching…

Amy watched as Karma seemed to stare down at that empty place on the table where both of their hands had just been.

"Are you okay?" She asked. She couldn't help but notice the way Karma was suddenly a lot more serious than usual. It wasn't like her to be pensive so Amy noticed it right away.

"Yeah, yeah," Karma shook her head, shaking it off. For some reason she couldn't think straight. It could've been Clarice or maybe it was the way Amy had been distant and grumpy? She wasn't sure what it was, to be honest, but she was starting to feel like an unwanted presence in Amy's life. And, more than anything, that really scared her.

"I hate to be a pain, Amy," Clarice butt in, putting her hand on her again and surprising Amy greatly with that soft touch to her bare arm. "We've got to get this done though. I don't have another time this week. I just don't."

Smooth as melted chocolate. Clarice had succeeded where Amy had failed time and time again. To lie to Karma Ashcroft? Oh, what a gift that would be! Amy thought.

"Oh," Amy said. "Yeah, okay," she looked nervously at Karma and then back to Clarice.

"It's just a report," Clarice said.

"Uh, huh," Karma nodded. She couldn't care anymore. All she cared about was why this was happening. It all felt staged. Karma couldn't possibly believe that any of this was true. She was sure that Clarice had snuck into that class to get close to Amy. She was sure of it. She just needed to find out why.

"Can I talk to you a sec?" Amy asked, looking back up at Karma and seeing something in her that made her nervous but also sad. "Just a minute?" Amy asked back at Clarice. "Wait here." To Clarice, it was more of an order than a question. Clarice would stay whether Amy wanted her to or not.

Clarice nodded in agreement but she honestly couldn't care less. These girls were pretty strange. High-strung, attached at the hip, there was something off about them too and Clarice found that mystery almost enticing. It was weird to want to know everything about them after only seeing them twice. But Clarice was sure it was probably just one of those gay things. They were probably a couple or something. Or maybe they used to be? She didn't know what it was but it was sweet to watch them. They cared for each other, somehow, in every little thing that they did. Clarice watched and tried not to stare. She only wished she had that with someone, at least once.

Amy stood and took Karma's hand, she led her away from the table so that she could talk to her off by the windows alone where no one would hear or judge or watch them and make them nervous.

"Sorry, I didn't know how to tell you."

"It's no big deal," Karma said. She couldn't look at Amy for some reason but she didn't want to think about it. Amy watched as Karma crossed her arms and avoided all eye-contact. She was doing that thing where she pretends to be okay.

"Karma, you're obviously upset," Amy said with a soft hand on Karma's waist and her eyes both searching to be seen by her.

"It's not that hard to shoot me a text," Karma explained.

"What are you my mother now?!" Amy joked coldly. It was irrational but she kinda felt like being mean.

"No!" Karma scoffed. How annoying to be questioned about this. How annoying to be best friends with someone who constantly treats you like crap and all at random. "I'm just saying. We always eat together and now we're not. A heads up would've been nice." It really wasn't irrational and she kept telling herself that. But she too had her random bouts of foolishness and mood swings. Not lately, of course, but before. She had put Amy through a lot if their long and jointed life together.

"I'm sorry, you're right," Amy relented. "School just started and I'm already stressed."

"Hey, Aims…" Karma said, looking up curiously. "Why were you touching?" It was itching at her, that thought. She had to ask and she had to ask now before Amy had a chance to think or explain it away. Amy couldn't lie on the spot so this was Karma's chance to try and get the truth.

"Huh?" Amy didn't know what to say. She felt herself to look back at Clarice embarrassed and not at all pleased.

"Back there… At the table?" Karma was optimistic but mostly for show. She didn't trust Clarice for some reason, though she couldn't put a pin in it just yet.

"Oh that?" Amy grimaced, "I dunno… She's weird." Karma watched as Amy shook it all off.

"Oh, okay, well. Don't get too stressed, okay?" From what she deduced, Karma was almost certain that Amy was devoid of feelings for this girl. She was just as nervous as she ever was and just as upset. College had not been fun yet for her and Karma was certain. She only wished she could change that but Amy would not let her try and that was sure.

"K," Amy relaxed. Karma was okay now, she was okay with it all. There would be a moment to breathe and relax. Even if it was a moment filled with strange stalker Clarice, it would be a moment none-the-less.

"See you soon?" Karma asked, her eyes finally agreeing to meet Amy's and see, her for exactly who she was, her good friend.

"Yeah, soon!" They did live together. Amy wondered if Karma remembered.

"K." She walked away and Amy just watched. Was she not even hungry? Who knows, maybe she'd come back with Lauren. Or maybe they'd cook something without her?

Amy was too stressed to think on it. She didn't want to dwell in Karma-land where everything felt complicated and stressful and unrequited and just messy.

Part II

Back at the table Clarice was trying to pretend she wasn't curious. She'd look down at her nails and play with her phone. The girls spent an awful long time slowly chatting by the window. Since Clarice didn't know them it was much more fun to see them as ex-lovers than friends. It made more sense and all their body language seemed to agree. Something about those two just seemed hungry. And Clarice could just feel that energy when she was near them, she could breathe it in and feel it as it filled her up and invigorated her. It was magnetic. They were magnetic.

"Sorry," Amy said, heading back to sit down near her.

"It's fine really," Clarice smiled, touching her again.

"Why do you keep doing that?" Amy asked.

"Doing what?"

"You keep touching me," she seemed uncomfortable with it and Clarice suddenly noticed.

"Oh shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"It's fine, but why?" Amy wanted to know. She really did. No one touched her like that, no one but Karma.

"I dunno why, honestly. I just touch you I guess. Maybe I want to? Who knows..." Clarice shrugged and looked away.

"So why are you looking for me? Why do you need to talk?" Amy tried to make sense of her but no sense could be had until Clarice said what she had come here to say.

"We don't have to talk if you need to be alone. That was intense back there," Clarice smiled. It was hard to pretend she wasn't intrigued and Amy could see that she was interested, it was plain as day.

"We're just friends," Amy said, seeing that look in Clarice that look that spoke volumes. She thinks we're girlfriends, Amy thought. It was laughable but it also hurt. Amy wished it was true but it wasn't. She swallowed her pain and looked up at the girl across from her curiously.

"Yeah, sure," Clarice shook. "Wish I had a friend like that," there was something about them that just screamed LOVERS. Clarice had to stifle her own laugh that came out of her without her control.

"Why are you laughing?!" Amy was pissed.

"It's nothing, just a joke I heard earlier."

"God, you're so fucking weird," it could be true. Clarice could just be a nutter.

"Thanks, I guess," Clarice said.

"Come on, tell me what's up." Amy tried to get comfortable but she wasn't comfortable so it wasn't going to happen. Clarice watched her shift nervously in her chair.

"Will you calm down?! I know you think I'm a stalker but I'm just a fucking girl. Flesh and blood. Thoughts in my head. Just like you," she stressed, for once finding a bit of annoyance with how Amy had treated her up until now.

"Okay?" Amy wanted to scream. She had escaped Karma but now she had to deal with this big fucking mystery. This cute girl who followed her around and tried to make her feel insane. It was fucking grating to be thinking about it all the time. What did Clarice want? Why was she here? Did she do this to other girls on campus or was Amy the only one? Was this some form of freakshow hazing or was there a point to it all? WOULD SHE EVER FUCKING KNOW?!

Amy sat and waited impatiently. She was at least grateful to not be thinking about Karma. But for some odd reason, Clarice still wasn't talking.

"Will you fucking tell me what you want?!" Amy exploded in her frustration. She was beginning to act like Lauren.

"Whoa!" Clarice said, her calm demeanor pierced for just a moment as she stared back at Amy and saw how easily frazzled she was. This would not bode well for later. Clarice took note. "Okay, geez, but…" She was so hesitant.

"What?" Amy asked.

"You're just not going to believe me. I know you won't."

"So what's your plan? Sit quietly near me, saying nothing, and hoping one day I just might trust you?!" The sarcasm in her voice was so disgustingly thick that Amy even hated to hear herself.

"No, no. I'm just… I don't know how to say this in a way that makes sense."

"Maybe you should just start talking," Amy pushed, staring over at her like she was dealing with a timid child instead of a grown ass adult. They were college students. This was college. ADULTS go to college. Not kids. ADULTS.

Clarice looked around, tapping the table with her nails. "Not here," She met Amy's eyes. "Come on I know a place we can go."

Amy opened her mouth, about to protest but instead she just let out a long, doleful sigh. "Fine." She waited for Clarice to get up and then followed her. Karma was still on her mind, like always. She was obsessively going over their encounter in her mind while trying to process this whole new aspect to her life.

They exited the cafeteria and walked through the student union. Eyes seem to be drawn to Clarice, and Amy by association. She felt like they were being followed by that collective attention all the way out the door. There was a certain exotic appeal to Clarice's presence. It was part of what irked her so much. The distraction from her surly inner turmoil was unwelcome.

Autumn was evident once they were in the open air. The cool breeze soothed Amy's ruffled feelings and the overcast sky gave her some solace. She caught up with Clarice as she walked with purpose across the quad and into a small, tree lined path. Ahead, tall brick buildings closed in close, creating a tunnel effect around the walkway. Clarice's hand brushed against Amy's bare arm and she felt that familiar flash of something intangible.

"Where are we going?" She asked as much to distract herself as to determine their destination. "I've never been this way before."

Clarice just smiled. She always seemed to know something that Amy didn't as if she was laughing at her somehow. It was one of those frustrating qualities. Yet, she still followed the girl as if some power beyond them drew her forward into the unknown.

"It's not much farther." Clarice looked over and reached out, pushing an errant leaf off of Amy's jacket, but then she remembered their earlier conversation. "Sorry, I just… can't seem to stop touching you."

Amy shrugged, not even bothering to turn. Now that she expected it, the touching wasn't exactly horrible. In front of them the path veered and then opened up into a small courtyard framed in between four buildings.

They passed from the sidewalk onto a large circular center block with a dark marble diamond design set in the middle. Paths branched off from the center circle of concrete at evenly spaced intervals. Each one disappeared from sight into the wooded area surrounding the buildings.

As they entered the center diamond Amy felt something pull at her body like a veil slipping over her. She had entered something and a discomfort settled over her. "What is this pace?" The crackle of static tickled her fingertips and danced across the ends of her hair.

The air seemed to sparkle around them but not visibly. Clarice sat down in the middle of the diamond. "Shh, can't you feel it," she said, looking up at Amy.

Standing still, Amy swiveled her head to look around. "No, what are you talking about?" She shifted, trying to not feel what Clarice was talking about but she couldn't. "This is weird. What the hell?"

"Just sit down," Clarice prompted. "I promise nothing bad is going to happen."

Amy rolled her eyes. "Um, no, you expect me to just trust you?"

With a chuckle, Clarice leaned up and patted the ground across from her. "What choice do you have?" Her innocent aura and the expectation she exuded convinced Amy. She huffed but she eventually sat in the spot indicated, crossing her legs like Clarice.

"Now what?" She asked.

Clarice reached over and took Amy's hands. "Okay, now close your eyes and clear your mind. This is a sacred space so nothing will interrupt us. You can just feel the trees around us the ground beneath us, and the breeze blowing. Concentrate on that and I'll show you something really cool."

She resisted as long as possible, keeping her eyes open until Clarice's stare made her close them. "This is stupid." Then she did as instructed to her dismay. The push of Clarice's will seemed to win her over, defeating her cynical doubt. It pulled her along so that she felt as if she was losing control of herself and the situation. Yet, she still did it; felt every particle of herself being absorbed into the world around them with little effort from her mind.

The space and Clarice's concentration pushed her into a new place mentally, relaxing her to the experience. There was a web of something otherworldly about the air around them. Soon she could see something in her mind, an image of a flame. It grew and grew until it consumed her vision. Alarm coursed through her but Clarice's hands tightened around hers and it soothed her concern away.

It was as if she was walking towards the flame in her mind's eye until she was just at the edge and she could see Clarice standing on the other side, her hands over the fire as if to warm them.

"Hi," Clarice said in her mind.

Amy cleared her throat. "Um, hi?"

The image of Clarice in her mind turned over her hand to reveal a pile of blue powder in her hand. She threw it into the flame and it lept up with a poof, dark blue smoke rolling into her field of vision. The forest around them was obscured by it and she heard the whisper of Clarice across from her.

"Open your eyes."

Amy did and instantly she tried to jerk her body back. There was a small flame licking the air between them. "What the fuck?"

Clarice held onto Amy to keep the flame going. "This is what I was trying to tell you about, Amy." She sent soothing feelings through their connection. "You have magic inside of you. Just like me."

"What the fuck?" Amy repeated the phrase and pulled her hands away with all the force she could muster. "Get the hell away from me!" Without a glance back she scrambled to her feet and ran as fast as she could. The space at the edge of the circle seemed to part for her, magic flowing over her skin as it did. She kept going, breaking through the circle and back onto the path.

Whatever she had just seen struck her to the quick. In her soul she felt it reverberate within her as if the flame still warmed her. The lingering tingle of it made her run the whole mile back to the dorm. This is not happening. The thought cycled through her as she stopped breathless in front of the dorm entrance. Fear gripped her and she glanced back the way she had come. No, she had not been followed. If she ever saw Clarice again, she had no idea what she would do, but running was high on the list.