Author's Note(s):
Hello to everybody out there who's reading my story, this is Hshh here and I'm giving you the fourth chapter of My thoughts. Now I have read a review about ending the story with a sad ending and well I tell you it's still not the END. As I said in the earlier chapter, this is an Amourshipping story and it's not one sided though it WILL take some time to make it so.
So Guest, please don't be sad (or whatever reactions you have when you typed the review) for every story does need a big or a small conflict and the conflict I could tell you right now is that Ash is confused with his feelings that made him to reject Serena's breakfast for him. For MPC, so you favor both of the story? Also sounds fine to me. Back to our reviewer Guest, I hope this chapter clears everything in Ash's perspective and hopefully would please you for the upcoming happy ending once Ash's feelings is solved.
Now then, let the fourth chapter of My thoughts commence!
I don't know why I was running away. Running away from a problem which almost everybody says to be the easiest and I know it sounds pathetic of me to talk about this since you know me as a sort of guy who never back down from a fight. You know me as the guy who saved a rampaging Garchomp on the roofs of the Lumious Tower and jumped fearlessly in order to save my pokemon.
However right now I feel vulnerable; I feel so weak. There was something that keeps me from looking straight at her...at her ocean blue eyes and I wonder what that thing was? In order to find out even just a hint, I woke up earliest of the group just to address my inventor friend this problem.
"Hey Clemont" I said approaching the blonde who just woke up from his sleep. He was so surprised to see me awake before him and yawned. "...Could you help me train my pokemon before arriving at Anistar City?" I said keeping the problem I want to address for a minute.
"Sure Ash" he replied. "Just let me cook breakfast first" Before he motioned after this, I stopped him and begged him. I clasped my hands and bowed, begging him to have breakfast ready after we're done practicing.
"Oh Clemont please" I begged him. "I'm really hype today that I can't wait to practice and also..." my voice trailed off. The inventor raised his eye brow up for the unusual pause on my sentence but was processing what I was trying to tell him and it wouldn't hurt to tell him about this after all, we're both guys aren't we? "I need you for something else. I would want to ask you for an advice"
"Ehhh, me giving advice!?" Clemont shrieked. He could not believe that I'm asking for one since I usually was the one giving them and he finds it weird. The expression of his is priceless however I doubt that people would have a different one.
"Uwaah who's giving an advice" Bonnie asked half-asleep. She had just woken up from her sleep and rubbed her eyes—she maybe was woken up by Clemont's shriek. She sat on her knees and repeats the question. "Hey which of you need an advice again?"
"No one" Clemont replied not wanting to tell her about the advice thing since he knows that she's just going to make a huge fuss about it. "Ash and I were just planning to head out to train for Ash's upcoming gym battle and he...wants some advice on how to strengthen his pokemon more" He looked at me and I nodded.
"Yep that's the plan!" I said enthusiastically to sound more believable and true to the young blonde. "I also going to ask him what type of pokemon the Anistar gym leader uses"
"Hmm okay" Bonnie said. She glanced at me and gave me a sly grin—I think she knows what I'm thinking right now and I wouldn't be surprised if she did for who would be surprised on her regarding love when she asks every beautiful ladies to "keep" her brother and marry him. "Anyway Bonnie do you want to tag along?" his brother asked. "No thanks; I promised Dedenne that I would brush his fur today" she said.
"If you say so" Clemont said. He turned his head to me and told me "Okay just let me change my clothes"
"So Ash what's the thing that you wanted to talk about?" Clemont asked once we got to the lakeside.
"It's umm about Serena" I said trying to sound calm despite being panicking on the inside. Okay just calm down, Ash nothing bad is going to happen if you tell him. "You see recently I've been having a hard time breathing and fast heart beat...and I think it has something to do with Serena"
"So your point is that Serena is somehow making you suffer?" Clemont asked. We sat down on the rock Serena sat down last night. Pikachu on the other hand was just quiet and just listening on where the conversation is bringing us—also he finds it intriguing.
"Yes and no" I sighed. "I mean Serena's a good girl; she's nice, friendly and nice, and I can't think of any reasons why she should hurt or fight with me. But I don't know why I am feeling like this around her and this feeling is giving me problems"
"Hmm something that makes you somehow suffer yet you can't think of any way on how the girl makes you do" Clemont summarized what I just told him. He was rubbing his temple hoping that it could help him process things out. "Doesn't that tell you that you're sick?"
"Maybe but I'm feeling all fine when I'm at least...not around her" I replied. "Man this is so complex; I couldn't find out why I'm feeling like this" I scratched my head furiously not understanding a hint of what am I feeling for her.
"...I think I'm getting the point to your problem Ash" Clemont suddenly spoke up. "But I don't know if I'm correct or not...after all I'm an inventor not a person who gives advices" He has a point; he is an inventor and talking things about this is somehow weird for us mainly because we don't talk about feelings that much rather, talk about battle strategies and earning badges.
"But here's what I think—Ash I think you're in love" Clemont said in a flat tone. He adjusted the bridge of his glasses and it gleamed as he did. He was wearing a soft yet serious expression that I couldn't see often, but him concluding that I'm in love was the real issue here.
Then I suddenly remembered what had happened yesterday or we could easily say last night—the kiss Serena gave me was surprising, hence it brought up a weird sensation that I describe as a weak electricity flowing to your spine and I couldn't say it was bad because a part of me was full of bliss.
I also felt a little disappointed when our lips parted and she went to sleep. However, this has been the first time this had happened to me: of all the girls that had travelled with me so far, only Serena was the one who I found out that had an affection towards me and I don't know how to react.
"Ash...Ash are you still there?" the inventor shook me by the shoulders to snap me out of my thoughts. He was looking at me with a worried expression and thinking that what he said to me brought me a shock which is true. "Ash are you alright?"
"Clemont...have you ever been in love in your life before" I asked. I asked because I wanted to know why he had concluded the fact that I maybe having an affection to our brunette friend. He just sighed and shrugged.
"As long as I can remember only once but it was more of a puppy love" He replied whilst shrugged. "However, I got my father's reference for love to try connecting the both of them and it seemed matched up perfectly."
"Is that so?" I said weakly. If this was the case, then there's no point continuing the conversation for it was already concluded furthermore I only feel more anxious every time I mentioned her name and a knot is somehow being created on my stomach, so I decided to proceed now on our training. I stood up from the rock and grinned at my friend. "Well then, shall we start training?"
"Hey Pikachu" I said in a flat tone. "I don't really understand myself now" I was lying on the grass doing nothing. The reason of training for another hour is just an excuse in order to escape this overwhelming feeling and I feel guilty for rejecting the breakfast she made me solely because I don't know what to do.
"Man I feel like an idiot" I said hopelessly. Also, I know she must be hurt for the fact that I rejected the breakfast she made with blood and sweat and that I looked like that I'm angry at her and I can't stand this injustice that I had caused. I stood up from where I was lying down and rubbed my head. I need to apologize to Serena now or else I'll be a coward for life. "Hey Pikachu I'm going back to the camp for a minute, can you just wait for me?"
"Pika pi" my partner replied. I smiled at him and thanked him. I patted him in the head and waved him goodbye. When I'm already half way towards the camp, I saw Clemont and Bonnie rushing towards me. Then there's something inside me tingles and I have a bad feeling about this. They were looking a very worried and nervous expressions that sends chills down in to my spine. I have a bad feeling about this...
"Satoshi" they both said. When we meet, they were panting (notably for the older sibling) and was hyperventilating to catch their breaths. "Ash...Serena...in the forest...no pokemon"
"!?" My eyes widen when I heard them saying this. She went to the forest without any pokemon; she didn't bring Braxien nor Pancham with her. Is she going to get herself in a mess? Then I realized that she probably ran to the forest because of me. Because I rejected her breakfast like it was nothing...she was hurt!
"Man I'm really an idiot!" I said scratching my head violently. "Clemont, Bonnie could you tell Pikachu that I'll be in the forest looking for Serena"
"Then let us come with you" Clemont said. I know he's worried about me and wants to come with me but I shook my head. "But Ash you left all your pokemons back in the camp"
"So did Serena" I shot back. "Hence this is my fault and I'm the one who's going to fix it" I said as I ran to the forest and ignored the protests and warnings of the older blonde for it was none of my concern if I get hurt—the main concern of mine is to make sure she's fine. To make sure Serena's fine. "Wait for me Serena, I'm coming!"
A/N:
Yeah I have to rush this chapter mainly because it's almost our quarterly exam and that I can't update stories during those times also I hope the chapter doesn't look like a trash for this reason. Anyway I'm still currently accepting votes on what stories shall I publish next after finishing this one, so don't be afraid to vote, okay?