Disclaimer: I do not own anything but Taipan.

Concerning the timeline and Orochimaru's defection;

I don't think I made it clear enough. Orochimaru had defected but he hadn't yet leave the country because there were a lot of loose ends he hadn't tied up yet. Taipan thought he hadn't defected because she found herself close to Konoha. It's from a 1st-person-pov so some of the things she said/thought could be false as it was her own assumptions.

Orochimaru wore an ANBU uniform in the last chapter because he had to snuck into the village for something and he was in disguise. (hint: Danzo would have Orochimaru implanting the Sharingan into his arms)

The Tenzo in the last chapter is not the Mokuton!Tenzo. He is of the Iburi clan who can turn themselves to smoke.

SERPENT'S EYE
by: Riseha

Chapter 3
Living Hell

I leaned against the wall, dull eyes staring at the dark and rocky ceiling. I could barely make out the texture with how dark it was. From behind the wall I was leaning against, the sounds of someone retching reached my ears.

"Are you done yet, Karin?"

A weak whimper answered me but I knew that the redhead would be trying to clean herself at my subtle prompting. Karin hadn't been here for long.

Father had thought it necessary to show Karin how the real world worked. He picked her up from Kusa and since she had such unique abilities - coupled with the many injuries I had after intense training sessions - she was assigned to be my partner, under my wing.

The door's lock clicked open and I glanced up at the redhead. She had a weak stomach and seeing how brutally we killed, she had puked. Even when I had been mutilating Iburi's body, I had been able to suppress it. How could I not when I wanted so badly to survive?

Orochimaru was watching me, as if daring me to act weak. When Iburi died, I had been left to clean up his body and the room because I'd reacted the first time I saw his beaten-up form.

Actually, it wasn't fair as it wasn't me - it had been Pan who had screamed.

I was so shocked I wouldn't have been able to summon my voice. And speaking of Pan, I was pissed with her. When Orochimaru had personally supervised our lessons - punishment or torture - with the Iburi boy, she had disconnected entirely, probably unable to handle what she was seeing.

I was angry enough about her abandonment to throttle myself just to get to her but once the hours-long session was over, I'd usually just slump into unconsciousness, haunted by nightmares and unable to do anything but try to rest my mind and protect my sanity.

For all of Pan's bravado, she was a child. I guess kids weren't supposed to be traumatized this way.

I glanced at my hand - if there was one good thing about Pan's abandonment, it was that I had started learning chakra. Chakra came more easily to me now - I wasn't sure if it was because it was survival instinct or it was because of Pan's absence.

It was always hard for me to summon chakra because I had never had it in my past life and this wasn't exactly my body no matter how comfortable I was with it. But Pan's sudden absence and emptiness in my mind made it sufficiently easier to summon chakra. I had doubts - was it because all this while, our minds were split, and she had hogged control over the chakra pathway system?

Whatever. Until she decides to come back, I wouldn't know.

"Wow, you can do it in, like, three seconds now." Karin's tired voice drifted into my ears and I turned to look at her, she had settled herself down beside me, looking tired.

I deactivated the Chakra Scalpel technique that Kabuto had taught me how to utilize. "Un," I mumbled. "Are you ready? We're leaving for the Land of Sound's Base."

I could sense great unease in the air, unspoken tension. This lab was being evacuated. Already, many things have been moved out and I thought I caught a glimpse of Juugo's orange hair but before I could call out to him, he had already been herded away.

I found that I suddenly missed Juugo and Kimimaro. I didn't know where they were - just that there was about only a dozen people left in this base, Karin and I included.

"Do you think people are threatening Orochimaru-sama?" Karin asked, nervously wringing her hands. She wasn't much for battle, she was starting to get used to bloodbaths - as she was my personal healer, she always had to be there whenever I was pitted against one of the many experiments in their Cursed Seal State.

They were ultimately failures that father wanted to dispose off and had handed them to me as practice dummies - moving, strong and quite-capable of killing dummies. If I'd died against them, father wouldn't have cared. Ever since the Iburi boy died, I had been forced to move up from sparring with my instructors to killing father's spares.

It was easy to think of them as 'things' instead of humans because they didn't look human when they were in their Stages.

"I heard Kabuto-san and Orochimaru-sama talking," whispered Karin, adjusting her glasses. "I think they're planning on administering the Cursed Seal to you once we reach there."

Which makes me all the more reluctant to refuse going.

Father had suddenly announced: "I'm done here, let's go, Taipan." That was a few hours ago where I had just been through grueling training. But I was no longer tired, not after biting Karin.

I was nervous. I had better remember how to act like I've never seen such things in person - because I had also been taught to read, write and recognize things - before.

"Right, how exciting," I mumbled with no real sarcasm.

Karin glanced at her watch, squinting. "I think we should go now. Orochimaru-sama won't be happy if we keep him waiting."

"Yeah," I said, standing with a long and heavy sigh. "Let's go."

I felt tired, emotionally drained but the promise of seeing the outside world for the first time in months - ever since Father had not-so-subtly warned me off wandering about without permission, I had not dared to sneak out - re-energized me and I was actually running.

Father was dressed in his Akatsuki cloak - I didn't know when he joined, just that he was now in the organization, because he didn't exactly tell me everything. I didn't even know he had defected from Konoha when I was only a baby until I saw his Akatsuki cloak. Since this hideout was in the heart of Konoha and I'd seen him in ANBU outfit before, I always thought... never mind. It didn't matter anymore - we're leaving anyway.

"We're ready," I told him.

Father glanced between Karin and I, a twisted smile on his lips. "How wonderful. The rest of them will be joining us soon enough. Let's go while the night is still young." Father led us down a secret passageway large enough for about six people to fit in and it led out of Konoha after an hour of running.

It wasn't too hard to act as if I had not seen a tree in person. I didn't exactly love nature but try staying underground for years with only a few intervals spared from that environment - you would've been jumping around like a monkey, excited.

"Karin, look - that tree's so tall! I didn't know they reach that sort of height!"

I really didn't; the trees in this world was definitely different from the trees in my world.

Father chuckled. "Yes, Taipan, that's a tree." I didn't know whether he was being mocking or he was trying to imply something - it was hard to tell with him.

The Land of Sound that was Father's territory wasn't too far away and we made it just as the sun was rising. By then, I was already carrying Karin who was snoring against my shoulder blade. I was also starting to get tired but I didn't dare complain - I always had the feeling that whenever Father looked at me, he was always daring me to act all bratty.

I was more shocked by the fact that Orochimaru was actually trying to make small talk. Our conversations went along the lines of something like this:

"Are you enjoying yourself, Taipan?"

"Yes." He made it sound like I would never ever enjoy this luxury. Cold sweat broke out but I managed to swallow without much difficulty.

"Is training painful?"

This situation I was in is called 'caught between a hard place and a rock' - I didn't know how to answer to that. If I said 'yes', he might punish me or kill me off for being such a wimp, if I said 'no', he might increase the training session to something inhumanly grueling.

So I answered with a vague, "Depends." Way to make him angry, Tai, congrats - my heart twinged slightly, imagining what Pan would say. Ugh, I can't believe I'd miss that traitorous little twit.

"Taipan, do you love life?"

"Yes," I said, wondering where he was trying to steer this conversation to.

But we reached before he could say anymore.

Father beckoned me to follow him into the hideout. It was a stronghold built under a tree and it was situated underground. I bit my lip, shifting Karin so that she would be more comfortable as I glanced down the marble stairs that Father was walking down. There was a sign declaring 'Otogakure' and two snake markings accompanied the front and the back of the banner, and what appeared to be a snake's skull on the top-most part.

I didn't know if it was real or not.

I cast one last mournful look at the sun that shone onto the back of my head - Karin's body was preventing the sun from reaching my torso - before following. I felt a tingling sensation as I passed through the entrance that had no doors. I wondered what sort of fuinjutsu barrier was placed there.

"This way," Father said, turning sharply to his left and I scrambled after him.

This hideout was very large - larger than the lab I had spend ten years in. "This will be your room, Karin's in the one opposite of yours - place her in her room and come with me."

I did as told, pushing the door to her room open and placing her down on the ground carefully before closing the door and running after Father's fading back. After a dozen of dizzying twists and turns, we came to a halt - I hadn't memorized any of the paths we'd taken and I was sure I'd be lost or something.

But anything about getting lost was thrown out the window when Father opened the door and I saw someone who I hadn't seen in years.

Without my agreeing, my face lit up, a smile crossing my lips. "Kimimaro!" And I darted past Father, ducking into the room. Before I could register what I was doing, I had thrown my arms around him, tackling him to the ground.

Pan! I thought angrily. I can't believe you!

Pan's giddiness warred with my annoyance. So tangled our emotions were that I didn't register Father warning me until Kimimaro screamed - in pain.

I - or Pan - recoiled, blinking, confused. "What's...?"

"Taipan, stand back," Father said. "Kimimaro is going through his transformation, there is no saying what he'd do in that unstable state."

I - having shoved Pan into the back of my mind - tensed and was about to pull back when Kimimaro gripped my arm, a snarl crossing his lips but I swore recognition flashed in his eyes. I bit back the cry of pain, staring him in the eye - wake up, Kimimaro, wake up - and - miracles of miracles - his vivid green eyes cleared and he slumped forward, eyes rolling into the back of his head, unconscious.

"Interesting," Father drawled, something in his tone made the hairs on my body rise. "Taipan, will you sit still?"

I couldn't move even if I wanted to - Father's KI was leaking into the room, invading all corners and Kimimaro's weight was pressing me down to the ground.

Then pain flared in my right shoulder; I glanced down, gasping, just as Father retracted his neck. Three slightly curved lines, spreading in a rip-like pattern - the Cursed Seal of Earth - I screamed.

Pain wracked my body - I threw Kimimaro off my body, clawing at my shoulder where Father had bit me - I was screaming myself hoarse - words spilling from my mouth that I myself couldn't comprehend but I was sure I had been begging for the pain to stop and for him to do something i'myourdaughter - black spots danced before my sight and all I could see was Father turning away and walking out of the room - abandoning me - all alone -

you'emyfatheryou'resupposedtobeprotectingmenottheonehurtingme-

I screamed as the world shattered, black and darkness falling into pieces as the night sky rose to take its place, stars twinkling and I suddenly recognized this place as the one where I had always snuck out to.

"Did you know how long I spent making this?"

I recognized that voice - identical to mine and I turned, tired, to see a girl with my face and eyes. It was Pan. I was too tired to glare at her and though the pain was null, I knew I was still suffering, writhing on the ground.

Pan was smiling at me - a smile so different from what I'd imagined she'd look like when she smiled. She looked truly happy and at peace here.

"You won't survive this," she informed me gleefully.

"Thanks for that tidbit," I murmured, falling face-first into the grass but this place wasn't real - there was no scent, no muddy feeling, the grass didn't tickle my nose or make my skin itch. "Where will I go now?"

Pan laughed - free of bitterness and hate, just pure bliss. "Nowhere, you'll be here - I will be the one leaving."

"You're going to trap me... in our mindscape?" Fury rose in me; I would not - absolutely would not - just -

"No," Pan said. "I think Father was intending to kill us from the start." I noticed how she was using 'us' now, as if we were one being - something she rarely, if ever, did. "He never expected us to survive this and when I realized this, I felt so damned angry I wanted to kill him - but I know I can't do it."

"Where are we?"

Pan waved her hand. "Your chakra reserves aren't enough to sustain you, the seal is sucking away all of it. I admit, I might have been suppressing your chakra. That's why you have such difficulty using chakra - you have trouble tapping into my chakra reserves. My chakra have been suppressing yours subconsciously and until I disconnected, I didn't realize the cause of your trouble."

"What?" I was baffled.

"We are two separate entities, our chakra pathways are different. I'm not sure what would happen if your chakra and mine combined. I feared the worst so I closed off yours, suppressing your chakra with mine consciously this time and allowing you to use my reserves."

I don't understand. "I never existed, why would I have chakra?"

"Chakra comes from the soul," Pan said, tapping her heart. "And the soul is here."

I narrowed my eyes. "You're lying."

"Oh you caught me," Pan huffed, crossing her arms defensively and she looked so much younger than the reflection I saw in the river a year ago. "Yes, I don't know what I'm talking about myself. I don't know how you managed to have chakra - it makes it seem as if you're just sealed into my body or something. Which brings us to what I'm going to tell you." I frowned at her but she turned away, her eyes fixed on the night sky but from the stretch on her cheeks, I could imagine her smiling. "I'm leaving, you hear me? When the stars take flight, I'll follow them -"

"Why? You're the one who didn't want to die - !"

Pan scuffed her foot in the ground. "It was all bravado. I don't... want to kill anyone. I love fighting, not killing, not torturing. Y-you're stronger than me. I shouldn't have existed in the first place, this body shouldn't still be functioning." She clasped her hands behind her back. "So I'm going."

"You're giving up?"

"So what?" Was it possible for someone to be cowardly and brave at the same time? Pan was always so contradictory - she was brave enough to leave this plane of existence, yet scared to face the reality.

"What if you ceased to exist?" I spat - revealing what I'd feared above all. Was there a world after this? I had died once and I didn't want to die again. This world was my afterlife, my last chance and I didn't want to waste it.

Pan stared at me. "Fading is better than existing. You and I shouldn't be sharing this body - we differ greatly, our views are never the same." She smirked. "And I'm not going to leave you again - " She extended her hand. "Come on, we'll go together."

The first star fell.

Seconds ticked by or maybe it was hours - I couldn't tell, time was fluid here, meaningless in this mind of ours.

"I -"

Her body glowed gold as more stars fell, raining - a bitter yet happy smile on her face. "Heh. I knew you'd say no. I'll combine our chakra pathways, our chakra reserves - if you live to tell the tale, don't say anything about this meeting. If you don't live, I'll still be with you."

"I didn't say - !"

"If you ever see my mom, can you tell her that I'm sorry she had to give birth to me?"

"...Is this even real? It's not really happening is it?"

Pan, already fading into sparks, reached out to pinch my cheek. "Of course this is happening in your head, but why shouldn't it be real?"

And the world tunneled.

"I'll wait for you - forever."

xxx

"Karin, stop slobbering me with your snot."

The redhead was the one I came to. I blinked, dazed - pain still dancing in the form of black spots in my sight. My whole body felt numb, hot and cold at once. "Come on, bite me!" Karin yelled, trying to pull my mouth open.

Weakly, I opened my mouth, sinking my sharper-than-normal incisors - that was a nicer term for fangs - into her skin. A day - or night - had passed since I last bit her, I was sure she'd be OK even though she'd be tired after this ordeal.

"You OK?"

"Where's... Father?"

"I'll go get him," Karin said, her eyes were rimmed red and she sniffled gratefully, rubbing her eyes when she saw me looking up at her. Then she turned and leave.

I rolled off the bed, feeling the rage and adrenalin surfacing from when I had been suppressing it because of Karin and I didn't want to hrut her. I was so angry - for what, I'm not sure myself - I was growling, on all fours, limbs tense and coiled to lunge. The first person to enter, I'll tear their face off -

Yes, that's what I'll do - I laughed. Never before had I felt so strong, so much power rushing into my being and -

Click - the door opened, light spilling in from artificial sources and I leapt - far faster than before and -

I snarled into the face, so pale and so amused, chakra scalpels bursting into life, encasing my palm to forearm in chakra deadly enough to cut. Someone countered me but I kicked him away - silver hair, black eyes, glasses - and lunged again, disregarding the screaming - Karin, you're scaring her, stop - and slashed, rapid-fire strikes, trying to inflict pain in the man - black hair, pale skin, gold eyes - who jumped away, further and further, an amused smile on his lips as if he found this oh so funny and interesting -

I hated being toyed with.

"Taipan." His hiss echoing in my ears, I lunged. "Stop right now." And he easily sidestepped my chakra blade, his hand caught my face, applying pressure as if he wanted to crush my skull in - I tensed and I twisted, jackknifing upwards to break his grip.

The man - Father - sighed heavily and this time, when he caught my face again, he slammed me into the wall - Karin screamed - and my vision spiraled -

"Stop this nonsense, Taipan," he said silkily. "You wouldn't really harm your father, would you?"

I hissed but the red was fading; the adrenaline burning in my veins starting to cool.

"Why don't you take your well-deserved rest?" he crooned. "You did very well, daughter."

And, rapid-quick that my eyes didn't catch it, he struck my neck's pressure point and everything went black as my body slid to the ground.

xxx

Disclaimer: I do not own anything you recognize and that includes the line taken from HP's Deathly Hallows.

You guys complain if she's too weak and you complain when she's strong (*coughsMarySuecoughs*) so I'll let you decide; Question: How strong should Taipan be? At Sasuke's level? At Orochimaru's level? At Kakashi's level?

/ Is Pan really gone? Hehe, no, never. /

xxx