4.
Last night's interrogation had failed to procure a proper answer. No matter how many times she asked, Ichigo only gave vague, incomplete answers.
"I have no idea. That would be one of those things you could only answer on the spot, like what you favourite child is. No-one can answer that question until a gun really is put to their head..."
That was Ichigo's way of ending the relentless onslaught of questions (All of which were the same hypothetical.) It had stopped her for the rest of the night, and although it had not solved her problem it had given her an idea.
"Hey Ichigo! Let's go Christmas shopping together!" Rukia beamed, rising far too early for the berry-head's liking. He groaned irritably and rolled over in his bed, simply ignoring her. Rukia sighed and contemplated Plan B.
She slid into the bed next him and shoved her face barely an inch away from his. "Hey, Ichigo." She whispered.
His eyes barely opened but the blurred image of Rukia's face so close to his forced him awake. He jumped back and cried out, falling off the side of his bed and knocking the back of his skull on the bedside table.
"Oh no! Not again?" Rukia dived onto the floor to help Ichigo up, obliviously landing on top of him in a position that could easily be misinterpreted.
And it did...
The bedroom door burst of its hinges as Isshin stormed through. "Ichigo I'm sick of your early morning antics! Learn to stay in your bed or I'll strap you down and-" He froze at the sight of the girl who was on all fours, right on top of Ichigo. His eyes went wide and his jaw dropped.
Rukia looked up, her cheeks burning bright red. "Uh...Good morning."
Isshin fainted, dropping like a bag of cement. He hit the floor with an even louder thud than his son, arousing the attention of the Kurosaki sisters. Their pounding little footsteps could be heard and Rukia instantly crawled under the bed out of sight.
The two girls entered the room and made shocked gasps at the sight of the two fallen family members.
Ichigo rose sharply, scaring the shit out the girls and making them both run into each other in their pitiful attempt to escape. They both collided with the floor and soon everyone was on the ground, moaning and groaning in pain except of course Rukia, who was merely hiding.
Twenty minutes later when the storm had passed, at least for a little while, Rukia crept out from under the bed only to confront Ichigo getting changed. The two met each others gazes, then both drifted down to his naked form and then they both screamed in perfectly scripted unison.
Rukia slithered back under the bed and Ichigo did his best to cover himself up from the front. Unfortunately, he didn't anticipate Yuzu to be barging through the door behind him. And Yuzu didn't predict the sight she would encounter within her older brother's room.
Another round of screams ensued and Ichigo roundhouse kicked the door, allowing it to slam into Yuzu and knock her out of the room before closing behind her. He then hurriedly tugged on a pair of jeans before his father ran in with a mouthful of curses and a bone to pick with his son.
Rukia withdrew further under the bed and tried as hard as she could to pretend she was somewhere else.
Happy place, happy place, happy place...Ah, Chappy...
Meanwhile, Ichigo endured the verbal punishment for the various accidents that had occurred that morning.
Yet another twenty minutes later when Rukia was certain the storm had passed she once again crawled out from under the bed. Ichigo was sulking while sitting on the windowsill. He didn't even glance at her as she emerged from her hiding place. He didn't even acknowledge her presence.
Rukia bowed her head. This was her fault. Once again she had caused him so much pain. Every year he had to put up with so much. It was almost always linked to her. She was as much to blame as his oddball family. This was why she had to make it up to him. This was why she needed to buy him the greatest gift of all, to make him feel the joy she did last year.
When she entered that big hall and the party started she felt a joy long buried within her. It had felt so good she wished it never had to end. She had to make Ichigo feel that joy now. It was her turn to host the best Christmas Party ever!
"Ichigo...I'm sorry for this morning, but do you still want to go shopping?"
Ichigo craned his neck to see her. "Might as well. I don't want to spend the day here with those freaks...Mind if we take the window?"
Rukia glared at her old nemesis, the window. It was mocking her with its silence. She scowled at the window but nodded regardless. Ichigo dropped down and waited for her. She 'accidentally' kicked the windowsill on her way out and dropped as gracefully as she could...On top of Ichigo.
Ichigo pried his head away from between Rukia's legs and coughed. "You were supposed to warn me first."
Rukia moved off of her friend and apologised. They clambered back to their feet and set off for the shops, where if all went well a lot of their problems would be solved...If...
Ichigo rubbed the back of his head and sighed. "I'm sorry I can't throw you another party this year...I used up so much money on the last one I'm still paying it back. I owe Orihime a fair bit as well. By the way, she seemed pretty angry when I woke up in her apartment yesterday. You know what that was about?"
Rukia looked around anxiously, her voice rising with an inflection. "Nope."
Ichigo nodded. "Hmm, maybe it was-"
"Don't say it!" Rukia snapped.
"I was just guessing." Ichigo grumbled.
"Well don't. Women aren't as easy to read as that."
Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Yeah it happens more than once a month." His voice dripped with sarcasm, but soon his nose was dripping blood after the vicious punch he received for his remarks.
Rukia instantly apologised and handed him a tissue to clean up the mess. "I'm sorry; I'm having a bad day today."
"You think you're having a bad day? I don't get to hide under the bed when things get heated. I have to sit there and take it!"
Rukia averted her gaze and choked back a flood of tears. He was right. She was so selfish, running away and leaving Ichigo to be humiliated and abused and god knows what else. She was overcome with guilt but her sadness must have been apparent as Ichigo draped an arm over her shoulder.
"Hey, don't get upset. I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at my stupid family. Now come on, let's go wash away our pain with senseless seasonal greed!"
Rukia couldn't help but be caught up in his excitement and they ran the next six blocks to the store, only to be worn out on arrival and have to walk through the large car park to the shopping centre.
They dragged themselves over to a pair of 'husband' chairs and sat down. Several husbands sat on the other chairs, barely staying awake while waiting for an eternity for their wives to exit the clothes stores, no doubt lugging ten bags for their faithful men to carry for them. It was the curse of all shopping centres, but at least they were comfy.
Ichigo couldn't help but laugh but when Rukia entered one of the ill-fated clothes stores he found himself biting his tongue. He cursed silently and waited. When she did come out she was one of eh few not carrying any bags. She frowned at Ichigo and then looked down at herself as if she had spilled something on her top.
"What's wrong?" Ichigo asked.
"They don't have anything in my size!" Rukia huffed, crossing her arms.
One of the husbands, a fat middle aged man started to laugh, overhearing their dilemma, but then his wife waddled out. She was shockingly obese and used a walking stick to keep herself up. "Nothing in my size." She murmured ashamedly.
Ichigo raised his middle finger to the husband and then ran off, instinctively grabbing Rukia's hand and dragging her along. He took no notice of it, but Rukia sure did, feeling an incredible warmth from his touch and a reassuring presence. She was blushing but Ichigo was too pre-occupied with ducking and weaving between mobs of shoppers to pay any heed to it.
When he finally stopped he looked down at their clasped hands and he too blushed. He shied away and rubbed the back of his neck. "He, he...Sorry."
Rukia's whole face went red. "No problem."
The two of them stood there awkwardly, waiting for the blood to stop rushing to their heads. When at last it stopped they resumed their Christmas shopping. Rukia payed close attention to the things Ichigo looked at but it seemed there was no way to figure out what he wanted.
It was then that the idea returned to her. "Ichigo, I'll meet up with you later. I'm going to check out that clothes store." Ichigo nodded and walked off.
Rukia watched him and then sprinted off to a seemingly abandoned store in the furthest corner of the centre. It looked like a store-room from a distance but up close a small cardboard sign could be seen.
'Modern and Ancient Weapons: Hire and sale' was written in black marker which had slightly smudged in some places.
Rukia cautiously stepped through the door and a little bell above the doorway rang. Rukia jumped, startled, but giggled nervously when she realised it was just a bell.
An old man with a grey beard which almost reached the floor approached her. "We don't sell handbags here missy."
Rukia giggled again though this time in a cracking tone. "Excuse me; I've come here to peruse your selection of fine weapons."
The old man looked her up and down, shrugged and waved a hand to the right hand side of the room. "Swords and ancient weapons are over there, the gun rack is on the other side. Give me a shout if you need anything." He hobbled off behind the counter and started cleaning a combat shotgun.
Rukia edged over to the swords first and noticed a pure white katana with a length of ribbon on the handle. It looked exactly like her own zanpakuto, Sode no Shirayuki. She admired the mortally-crafted weapon and noticed the price-tag. It was dirt cheap.
"Oh that's bullshit!" Rukia yelled a bit too loud for comfort.
The old man emerged from the shadows behind her. "What's wrong missy?"
"Huh? Oh, it's just that this sword is so exquisitely crafted, yet it is so cheap. The maker must be angry at how little his work is being sold for." Rukia lied.
"Hmm, it looks pretty, but the blade is weak. You might dazzle an opponent with that thing but try and slice his arm off and it'll break against his bones."
Rukia took a step back away from the increasingly creepy old man. "Well...You learn something everyday don't you?"
An awkward silence began.
When she was done she wandered around aimlessly, trying to find Ichigo. She cursed the fact she didn't work out a meeting place because now she had to walk around the entire centre in search of him.
After an hour she headed to the outside areas and passed a liquor store with two familiar friends inside.
Matsumoto left Kyouraku at the counter while she went to greet Rukia. "Hey, fancy meeting you here! So have you bought a present for Ichigo yet?"
Rukia looked away. "Well, you see..."
"Oh, guys are easy to shop for!" Matsumoto bellowed. "A guy will accept just about anything as long as you give him a kiss along with it. Oh and dress sexy, that always works."
"Ichigo, I've got an extra special present for your birthday." Rukia said in a seductive tone. She walked into the room dressed in lingerie and carrying a tiny wrapped present. She sat on his lap while he opened it.
Ichigo frowned. "Is this...A roll of sticky tape?"
Rukia leaned over and whispered in his ear. "I have another present for you..." She then started to undress.
Rukia frowned, her cheeks turning red. "Um, I don't think he'd like that."
Matsumoto gasped. "He's not gay is he?"
"What? Of course not! I'm just saying that kind of...present...Isn't really the thing he'd like. I want to get him something special."
"What about some good wine?"
"He's a minor." Rukia explained, deadpan.
"Well, what about...A pet?" Matsumoto suggested.
Rukia placed a finger to her chin. "A pet..."
"Ichigo, Ichigo, Open your present!" Rukia bounced up and down excitedly.
"Ok, ok, calm down." Ichigo reached for the oddly wrapped present which mysteriously walked away from him. "Did it just move?"
"No." Rukia responded swiftly. She brought it over to Ichigo and handed it to him. "There."
Ichigo started to unwrap it when he drew his hand back and cried out. "Ah! It bit me!"
"Well-" Rukia had no time to explain as the rabid little puppy latched onto him and started mauling him.
Rukia went pale. "I'll think about it."
Matsumoto sighed. "Well, we still have a lot to buy before Christmas so we had better get going. Good luck finding a present!"
Rukia waved them off and sat down on a bench. Her head rolled to one side and she spotted Ichigo up the far end of the outer shopping area. She smiled wickedly and raced towards him.
Ichigo walked casually down the path keeping a keen eye out for Rukia. No doubt she was looking for him too. He strolled down the sheltered pathway checking each shop he passed before moving on. It was irritating and tiring but he had to find her before he could leave.
He round a corner into an open area and stopped by the large fountain to have a quick rest down. He sighed heavily and spent a few minutes searching for her, but to no avail. When his legs were no longer sore he got back up and resumed searching on foot.
When passed another store he noticed a blur of movement and spun around to check what it was. Before he could focus on it he felt something pressed against the back of his head. It was cold and hard, like steel. He was still uncertain but when he heard a loud click he became fully aware that it was a gun.
People all around him were screaming and diving to the ground or running. Ichigo got down on his knees and started trembling. "Hey, I don't want any trouble! Please don't hurt me!"
"I'll let you go...If you answer a question for me."
"S-Sure! Just please don't shoot!"
"Alright kid...What do you want for Christmas?"
Ichigo's eyes widened. "I, uh...I don't know."
The gun was pressed harder against his skull. "Answer!" The assailant snarled.
Ichigo was sobbing now. "Please! I'm begging you!"
"What about a pet?"
"What?"
"A pet! Do you like pets?" The gunman roared.
"I guess so." Ichigo answered submissively. "Just let me go!"
"Wait; are you a cat or a dog person?" The assailant asked menacingly. When Ichigo didn't answer the maniac screamed the question in his ear.
Ichigo cried out through the tears. "I like puppies!"
"Very well, Merry Christmas." The gunman bolted off.