Hello everyone! Thank you all so much for your reviews and ads. I'm sorry I didn't respond to everyone's reviews, this week has been a little crazy and I've barely had time to write or even edit much; so, if this chapter is awful I'm sorry. Let me know what you think and thanks for reading!

Disclaimer: I own nothing associated with the Twilight series.

Chapter 4

The following morning I woke up from the two hours of sleep I managed to get that night feeling like I had been ran over by a bus. The nightmares had come back full force and every time I closed my eyes I fell into the same hell over and over again. My entire body ached and my headed pounded to the point that the sound almost echoed in my ears. I had woken Jason a couple of times during the night and he had come running into my room to calm me down. Unlike before, I actually let him comfort me and it surprised me that I actually felt safer when he did.

I sighed quietly as I looked at the alarm clock on my nightstand and saw the bright red numbers read 6:03 in the morning. I had no plans on going back to sleep and I didn't want to get out of bed, but my mouth was dry and I was very thirsty. Jason was probably up and getting ready to head into work anyway. I sighed again before I slowly climbed from the bed and pressed the heel of my hand to my forehead as the pounding moved from the back of my head to the front. I lowered my hand and stood from the bed, shivering a bit as my feet hit the cool wood of the floor.

As I walked quietly down the hall into the living room, I stretched my neck to the sides and earned several loud 'pops' as I did so. I sighed contentedly at the release that washed over my shoulders after I did that, but the tension wasn't gone for long. When I walked into the kitchen I groaned at the loud noise of the coffee pot finishing up its percolation. "Morning," Jason said softly and I moved my eyes from the tile floor to see him standing at the counter, pouring himself a cup of coffee from the pot.

"Morning, would you pour me a cup of that?" I asked as I sat down at the coffee table. He shot me a pitiful look before he grabbed another mug from its hanging hook under the counter above the coffee pot. He poured some milk in my mug and brought it along with the small bowl of sugar and a spoon over to me. "Thanks," I said as I put three spoonfuls of sugar into the tan coffee and stirred it. I wasn't one for coffee, which was why I added so much sugar, but I needed the caffeine if I was going to make it through the day.

"Did you get any sleep at all last night?" he asked before he took a drink of his black coffee after he sat down at the table with me. I never understood how he could drink coffee without anything in it to take away the bitterness.

"Some and I'm sorry I woke you up," I said before I took a drink of my own coffee. I made a face as I put the cup back down on the table and added another spoonful of sugar.

"Don't be," Jason said as he shook his head and I looked at him. "You haven't had nightmares like that for two years," he said quietly and I nodded my head as I sighed yet again. "I'm going to talk to Paul and I'm going to tell him to stay the hell away from you." For some bizarre reason my chest tightened at the thought of never seeing Paul again, but I pushed it away and shook my head as I held Jason's eyes.

"Don't jeopardize your job, Jason," I said and he shrugged with his indifference clear on his face.

"We really don't need the money right now, Harp," he said, calling me by nickname that he had given me when we were little. "We'll be fine until I can find something else."

"Jason," I said, "I really like Kim and the others. They're good people and you can't leave Sam shorthanded."

"Harper, because of Paul you're nightmares are back full force," he argued, a frown on his face. "Do you think I like waking up to you screaming and begging for your life in the middle of the night again?" I took a deep breath as I closed my eyes and centered my thoughts, pulling them away from the images that filled my mind while I slept. I opened my eyes and met his gaze evenly.

"Paul made a mistake and he left when I told him to. He doesn't know; none of them know what happened to me, to us. You can't hold it against him." Jason was still frowning at me as I spoke and after a second he looked down at the table and raised his coffee cup to his lips. "You can't expect your friends or the even whole town to walk on eggshells around me when they don't know anything about me yet. Besides, I don't want them to."

"When did you become the voice of reason, especially at six-thirty in the morning?" he asked before he took a drink of his coffee and looked back at me.

"You have almost three and a half years of therapy to thank for that," I said before I took a drink of my own coffee. We sat in silence for a little while longer before Jason sighed and stood.

"I'll be home around five," Jason said and I looked up at him with a raised eyebrow and he smiled at me. "I won't say anything to him, I promise." He started to walk out of the kitchen when I stood and quickly caught his arm. He looked down at me with a frown, but I didn't pay any attention to it. Hesitantly, I wrapped my arms around his torso and hugged him, resting my head on his shoulder. Again, Jason stiffened but he was quick to return my embrace. "This is new," he said quietly and I smiled. I had been able to stand Jason's touch for a while now, but I still felt a mild rush of fear. However, as I hugged my brother and he hugged me back the fear didn't come and I relaxed into his arms.

"I love you, Jason," I whispered and he sighed softly before he squeezed me gently.

"I love you too, Harper," he said and we slowly pulled apart. When I looked up at him, tears lined my eyes but they weren't like the tears I usually cried. I was happy despite my aching body, pounding head, and heavy heart. I wasn't afraid for him to hug me or even touch me. His touch comforted me like it should have, but I had a feeling at that moment in time he was probably the only one. "Hey, what's wrong?" I shook my head and smiled through my tears.

"Nothing," I said. "Have a nice day." He smiled at me and when he raised his hand and rested it on my neck. I didn't flinch.

"I'll see you later," he said as he lowered his hand and walked out of the kitchen, through the living room, and out the front door. The second he was gone whatever energy I had gotten in the ten minutes of sitting with him left me and I sighed heavily before I turned back to the table. I cleared away our coffee cups and my spoon and put the sugar bowl back in its place on the counter before I turned off the kitchen light and walked into the living room. I grabbed the TV remote from the coffee table and turned on the morning news as I sat down on the sofa.

My mind strayed away from the stories the anchors were talking about as I looked out the large window behind the TV. Jason had opened the curtains and I could easily see outside. The sun had already risen but the dimness of the light was all the confirmation I needed that the sky was overcast yet again. I was pretty sure I hadn't seen much of the sun since our move to Forks, but I really hadn't gone outside to really judge. Aside from the one trip to Sam and Emily's house, I had kept myself locked away in the house. I shook my head slight before I returned my eyes to the television.

As I sat there with the anchors' voices humming in my ears, my eyes grew heavy and sleep threatened to claim me. I shook my head roughly and turned off the television before I put the remote back on the coffee table and stood from the sofa. I walked into my room and hastily grabbed my robe before I went into the bathroom, only pausing long enough to grab a towel from the linen closet. I needed a shower to wake me up fully and then I was going to go for a walk; a nice walk in the early morning air to keep myself alert. If I sat around the house, I would fall asleep and that was the last thing I wanted just then.

Even though there was an overcast of light and dark gray clouds dampened the mood outside, Forks was really beautiful place. I was walking down the road with my hands in the pockets of the light jacket I had pulled on before I left the house. There was a slight breeze and it blew my hair that I had left down after I dried it. It was straight for once but the longer I was outside the more the curls were starting to come back. One had to love the moisture of northwestern Washington.

I was surrounded by trees as I walked along the side of the road. I had left the line of houses a while ago and I realized that I was heading the direction of La Push, but I wasn't going to go that far. It would take me all day to get there if I tried. I didn't plan on going much further. I'd been walking for over an hour and my feet were starting to ache a bit in my less than ideal tennis shoes. I was in desperate need of a new pair and I made a mental note to ask Jason for some money so I could get a pair. I pulled my hands out of my pockets and tucked my hair behind my ears only to jump at the sound of a car zooming by from behind me. I let out a surprised shout as I stumbled over a rock I hadn't noticed and I found myself tumbling down the ditch to the tree line.

"Could I be any more graceful?" I asked the sky softly and the tops of the trees that I was looking up at from the prone position I landed in on my back. I was tempted to just lay there since I was so tired, but it would have been very stupid for me to do that. Now I had a reason for my body to ache and I winced as I sat up and put my hand on my lower back. I stretched my back and sighed before I picked myself up from the ground and brushed the grass and dirt from my jeans and jacket before I started running my fingers through my hair to free it of the same debris and a few small twigs that had found their way into the now curly mass of hair.

"Are you okay?" a deep voice asked from behind me and I let out yet another shout as I spun around to see a shirtless Paul with concern etched across his face. I was stunned to find him standing there and the fact that he was only wearing a pair of jean cut offs threw me for a bit of a loop.

"Fine," I said tightly before I quickly trudged up the steep hill only to slip on the mud. Hands were on my waist the heat from Paul's hands seeped through my jacket and made me gasp as he helped me right myself.

"I don't think you're okay," he said and I pushed his hands from my waist. Surprisingly, I wasn't afraid like I would have been and I didn't freak out like usual. I was perfectly fine; I just wasn't comfortable with him touching me yet like I was Jason. I stumbled a bit as I turned to look up at him, but he didn't reach out to steady me. "Sorry," he said softly and I shook my head.

"It's fine. Thank you," I said before I bit my lip and I turned to start my way back up the hill when his voice stopped me.

"Harper," he said quickly and I turned back to look at him. He took a slow breath through his nose and his eyes softened as he looked at me. "I'm sorry for yesterday," he said slowly as his dark eyes locked with mine. "I shouldn't have grabbed you like that. Whatever happened . . .," he trailed off and I noticed his fists clenched at his sides and shook slightly before he took a deep breath and continued. "Whatever happened, it must have been pretty bad for you to react that way to me and I really am sorry for scaring you." His voice was very tight as he spoke and his eyes flickered from my eyes to the side of my face as he did.

I nodded and looked away from him and at the ground only to notice his bare feet. He wasn't wearing any shoes either, which was odd, and other than the one car that had startled me there hadn't been another one on the road. No one but me was along the road as I had been walking and it was like Paul just came out of nowhere. I looked up at his stressed face and before I could stop myself the question escaped my lips.

"Where did you come from?" I asked and he shifted his stance before he ran his hand through his hair and gestured towards the trees as he lowered his hand from his head.

"I was in the woods," he said.

"Barefoot?" I asked with a raised eyebrow and he shrugged.

"I like to rough it," he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world and a strange expression on his face; and I couldn't help it. I laughed at his expression and I quickly raised my hand to my mouth to muffle the sound, but I was too late. Paul's face lit up in a beautiful smile when I laughed and I blushed as I lowered my hand.

"You should be careful," I said through a smile. I didn't really know if I should believe him or not, but I did even though I had no reason to. "You could step on something and cut your foot up pretty bad."

"I'm always careful," he said, still smiling. We just looked at each other for several beats and I watched as his smile slowly morphed into a frown. "You don't look like you feel very well, are you okay?" I looked away from him and nodded.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said softly as I looked towards the road. "I should get home," I said before I looked back at him and he took half a step closer to me with his frown still set on his face.

"Let me walk with you," he said.

"You don't have to walk me," I said. "I'll be fine on my own. It's really not that far." He gave me a half smile and shook his head.

"You're actually a quarter of the way to La Push," he said. "You walked quite a ways."

"I hadn't realized I'd gone that far," I said softly and Paul's smile grew slightly as he looked at me.

"Let me walk you home, Harper," he said. I realized then that Paul should have been on the job that Jason was working with the others, and I didn't have the slightest clue why he wasn't.

"Shouldn't you be at work?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Sam told me to take some time off. I wasn't in the best of moods yesterday when I got on site," he said. "Well?" he questioned and I nodded.

"Okay," I said answering his question and he smiled at me again before the two of us made our way up the hill towards the road.

Once we reached the road and started walking the direction I had been coming from we walked in silence. After ten silent minutes, I noticed my pace was slowing as I walked and I had a hard time keeping my eyes open. I closed my eyes for a second as I walked, but that was long enough for me to trip again. Paul had very quick reflexes because he caught me and saved me from tumbling down into the ditch again. I gasped at the heat the radiated off of him as he held me close to him. My eyes snapped open and I looked up at him. My heart raced and jumped up into my throat at the concern I saw in his eyes.

"You're not okay," he said gently. I didn't pull away from him and since I didn't he didn't let me go. Paul's arms around me at that moment were comforting like Jason's embrace had suddenly become. Standing there with him, I felt like nothing would ever hurt me again. I figured those feelings and my willingness to stay in his arms was thanks to my clouded and sleep deprived brain.

"Yes I am," I said but I didn't sound very convincing, even to myself.

"Do you have a cell phone?" he asked and I nodded.

"Yeah, why?" I asked and he let go of me and held out his right hand.

"I'm going to call your brother to come and pick you up and take you home. You shouldn't walk all the way back home when you can barely walk fifty yards," he said and I shook my head as I turned away from him and started down the road again.

"I'll be fine, Paul," I said over my shoulder and he quickly caught up with me. "I didn't get much sleep last night and I guess I'm more tired than I realized when I left the house."

"Harper," he said as he gently took a hold of my arm and yet again I was okay with him touching me. I looked up at him and blinked a few times when there was suddenly two of him. The exhaustion was quickly catching up with me and I was suddenly glad I wasn't alone on the side of the road anymore. "If you've got to walk, let me carry you."

"What?" I asked.

"Let me carry you the rest of the way," he said.

"Don't be ridiculous, Paul," I said. "You'd break your back." I wasn't fat, but I didn't have the perfect body. I was carrying around an extra fifteen pounds and sadly it was all in my hips.

"You don't weigh anything compared to what I'm usually hauling around," he said. "For my peace of mind, please. I don't want you falling and getting hurt." To my foggy brain his offer was very tempting and my body was crying for me to lie down.

"All right, but when I get too heavy put me down," I said and he shook his head as he lowered his hand from my arm and gently grasped my wrist before he grabbed my other one and put my hands behind his neck. He leaned down and his face was even with mine. The position was rather intimate and I normally would have been afraid, but I was too tired to pull away from him as we looked into each other's eyes.

"I won't have to," he said softly. He put his right arm under my knees and his left behind my back before he lifted me like I was nothing.

He settled me in his arms and started to walk down the road. I was very comfortable and I sighed quietly as I lowered my right arm to rest on my stomach while my left hand remained on his right shoulder. I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes as his body heat warmed me instantly. I tried to fight the sleep that threatened to claim me, but it was no use. I was too tired and Paul, despite being solid muscle, was too comfortable and I soon drifted off to sleep.