Chapter 4: Drink Up

Penelope had taken Derek back to her hotel. He was grateful for that. That someone was leading him away from the memories, away from the responsibilities, away from the shit that was drowning him. One of the best things about Penelope was that she didn't judge him. She knew that he would eventually face the world, but he needed to take some time to be himself, to be free.

She guided him into the room and as she locked the door behind them, he made a beeline to the mini-bar. Penelope turned around and bit her lip. "Are you--"

"Garcia." The use of her last name made them both pause – his voice had sounded so harsh using her name that way. Derek took at deep breath and softened his tone. "Pen, just for tonight, let me be an idiot."

She narrowed her eyes at him and repeated what she had been about to say. "Are you sure you want that mini-bar crap when I have a full bottle of Jack Daniels and vodka in this bag?"

Derek paused, his hands full of little bottles of liquor. "Baby girl, you are much better at this cheering up thing than I am!"

She smiled suddenly, and everything felt tremendously lighter. "Don't I know it!"

So there they sat, laughing, crying, talking and playing silly games. He felt better than he had ever in his life. He wasn't on a case constantly worrying about getting the unsub, he was being distracted so well that he couldn't think about his mother and he was with his favourite person.

"You know you're drunk," Derek explained to Penelope, "when moving your head even slightly causes you to contemplate the meaning of life."

Penelope raised an eyebrow. "And what, pray tell, is the meaning of life, my chocolate coated god of thunder?"

Derek chuckled and pulled Penelope over to him. "Well, obviously the meaning of life is 42."

"Of course, Douglas Adams is a genius," Pen nodded wisely, snuggling up to Derek's shoulder.

"But it's also finding and surrounding yourself with people who allow you to be free, and keep a careful eye on you while you do it," he said smiling.

"Indeed. Although I think my careful eye went bye-bye a little while ago. I knew getting drunk was just plain silly."

"I didn't think so," Derek said. "We're hell more fun when we're drunk!"

"True. We do tend to come up with a lot of plans involving elephants though."

Derek laughed. "That we do. That time when we were in Michigan tops the cake."

"Ah yes, the famous 'but you have to have elephants for sale you're a pet shop' call of 2005."

Both of them began laughing hard, Penelope had tears falling down her cheeks. Calming down, she smoothed a hand over his shoulder. "Have I let you be enough of an idiot?"

Derek was quiet for a moment. "Not quite."

Penelope looked at the bottles of liquor sitting in front of them. "But I don't think it's healthy to drink anymore. Tempting though that vodka is---you know what, I will have another."

He stopped her. Holding her hand he pulled her back. "Not really what I meant."

"What did you mea--?"

But she could not finish her sentence. Derek was kissing her, gently massaging her lips with his own. When he pulled back, she whimpered slightly from the loss of contact, before opening her eyes and looking at him.

"Well, that was…" Penelope struggled. "I mean, that was…just…well, it felt….good," she finished lamely.

Derek smirked at her. A finger tracing the side of her face. "Only good?"

Penelope made a noise of frustration. "I don't deal with this kind of pressure well!"

"I'm noticing," he said, still seemingly entranced with tracing her face. "This is the smartest thing I've ever done drunk." He kissed her again, leaving her panting.

"If you squint, that was almost sweet, hot stuff," Penelope giggled.

He chuckled. "Pen, I need you."

"Derek, I want you," she said quietly.

He smiled. "Is there a difference?"

"Only with you." She sat up and put some distance between us. "There's a difference between a kiss and sex. There's a difference between friend and lover. There's a difference between a normal friendship and whatever the hell we have."

He sat and watched as she paced up and down the hotel room ranting.

"And I'm scared that if we change one of the elements that makes us, well, us – well I'm scared I'll be left without you."

"Pen, stop moving. Sit and quiet that motor mouth for a minute."

Penelope dropped to the floor and gazed at him.

"These last few days have been hard. I didn't know how I was going to survive them. And this afternoon the only thing I could think of was you. You – who forces me come over to your apartment and watch stupid movies and eat Chinese food because I look down. You – who write reports for me to make sure I look after myself and my family. You – who rings me in the middle of the night because you're worried about me. You – who makes me laugh even when my world is falling apart. You – who piece it back together. You – who gets the next available flight to Chicago because I called you and said I needed you…" He paused and took a breath. "You are my solace. My freedom. If I didn't realise I'm in love with I'd be a complete idiot."

Throughout his speech he had been crawling to where she was sitting, and by the time he'd finished he was sitting right in front of her. He looked up and saw she was staring at him in absolute shock.

"And I--" he said looking down.

"Derek?"

He looked up.

"Shut up."

She kissed him.

Right well, if it was any good, drop a review.