Author's Note: I never write in first person, nor do I ever write in the present. Well, seeing as I am trying to expand my horizons, I've done both with this ficlet. As always I do not own Kyle XY.

Temptation, an Amanda's Shorts ficlet

"Amanda?"

I smile at him. "Yes Kyle." The smile he gives me always seems so genuine, it's really impossible to stay angry at him.

"I love you," he starts and stops.

"I love you too," I say, knowing there's more, seeing as I just left his house.

"I'm so sorry you had to hear that…"

I laugh. "What?" I ask. "Jessi's swearing? Kyle, her mouth is clean compared to Charlie's." It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt of course, but I'll get over it.

"She's not accustomed to losing."

Understatement of the year, Kyle. "She knew I studied classical music my whole life; she should have expected the challenge."

Kyle nods. "She did." He pauses. "She didn't expect you to get a perfect score."

I feel just a tiny bit bad. There is a reason why no one ever plays that game with me. When I was twelve I memorized all 1500 questions and answers and have remembered them since. It's really easy for me to remember classical music – I regularly play a lot of those pieces. But then again, we are talking about Jessi, a girl I don't particular like, for numerous reasons. A mischievous thought occurs to me. "Did you?"

He smiles sheepishly. "I thought it would be closer than it turned out."

Fifty to fifteen is a little one sided, that's true, but I just can't help it around her. I know she would do the same given the chance, from experience. "Last week she totally beat me in Scrabble; I thought it was fair to beat her at something for a change."

"Yeah," he says smiling. "Eight hundred twenty-three to one-eighty-eight."

His memory still sometimes scares me but I ignore today. "That's even worse than my mom does, and she plays for blood." When his smile doesn't vanish, I ask him, trying to feign being hurt. I'm really not that fragile. "Are you poking fun at me now?" I give him a half hearted pout.

It used to be surprising eons ago when I first met Kyle that he never fell for any of my woe is me I'm a weak girl tricks. They were always so successful with Charlie. Kyle is always concerned and stuff but not once have I ever tricked him into giving me a kiss or a hug, unlike Charlie. To think I once believed that was love!

Granted all I have to do is pucker up and he's typically there, with lips puckered himself. Because I'm practically addicted to him, I make the slightest move and he responds immediately and I melt in his arms. I would really like to do more than just kiss and hug but I am grateful that he has never pushed me. I don't think I'd say no. As we kiss I close my eyes and think momentarily about my mom being gone for another night shift. When the kiss ends I stand there holding his hands and gaze into his heavenly blue eyes.

And I hesitate. I want to go further but I'm so tempted to do things I've only ever wanted to do to my husband – I have lists of those things naturally – I just can't bring it up.

This is something that Kyle always seems to read incorrectly, my indecision, my hesitation. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm fine," I lie, but then I can't really say come up to my room and let's get busy.

Can't I?

I stare into his eyes and he turns his head a little, looking at me strangely. I've long suspected he can tell when I lie; hence the reason I am almost always telling him the truth.

He says, "If you say so."

"Kyle?" I say as I get to my front door and think one more time about inviting him in. I suppress a sigh, knowing I can't betray my mother's trust or my faith and so I swallow. "Good night."

Kyle, my lovely and terribly innocent – more innocent than I am! – boyfriend smiles broadly but his eyes actually move down from my eyes for just a second. I'm shocked that he even glanced there as he's never done that before. "I wish you the very sweetest dreams, Amanda. Good night."

I hear him sigh as he turns on his heel and starts walking back to his house.

***

And so here I am still wide awake at two in the morning wondering if Kyle can read my mind.

Nah, it's impossible.

I thought that maybe writing this down in here would help me sleep or get over the sense that Kyle wants the very same thing and we're just both too shy to admit it. In any case, I tried to write it exactly as we said it, so I can check it once in a while, and see if he can read my mind.

A cloud just covered the full moon's rays outside my window. That was quick, it's already gone.

I'll just take a quick peek at the moon. Sometimes that helps me get to sleep, by thinking of otherworldly things, like God.

***

It's now five in the morning and Kyle just left. Now I'm tired, but I just had to say one little thing, without getting into any details. The moon wasn't blocked by a cloud. And now I'll probably have to burn this entire journal, or at least heavily censor it. I'm still reeling by what he just told me.

My God.