Chapter Four

Road was sitting in the church pew uncomfortably, shifting around in her seat, wringing her hands. It was a beautiful and majestic church with tall stained glass windows all along the walls and a large altar with fine cloth draped over it and candles that loomed almost ominously over the congregation, flickering on their wicks and casting long shadows over the church floor. Nobody had recognized Road as she came in, as she had left her hair long and tied it back in a pale blue ribbon. She still didn't have any decent clothes of her own to wear, so she was wearing Lenalee's, which Allen couldn't really figure out why he had, but who was a good bit taller than Road, so they kind of swam on her, but she managed to make them fit her well enough to be presentable. She didn't want to look scruffy when she went to church for the first time in so many years, and moreover, she didn't want anyone to recognize her. She had asked Allen to use the name that her parents had given her… Kyoko. She had always hated that name before, because it reminded her of how much she hated her parents, but now, she was glad that she had it.

Several people had asked if Allen was going out with Road, whom he did indeed introduce as Kyoko. He always just smiled politely and shook his head, saying that she was an old friend that he met when he was still a performer, and whom he ran into again recently. It was a lie, but Allen apparently figured that it would be easier to tell a small lie than to deal with the shock of the congregation as they looked at one of the former Noahs. They would likely chase both Allen and Road out of the church and then summarily out of town, and there would be little that anyone could do to stop them.

Suddenly, though, Allen became tense as General Marion Cross sat down next to him and patted him on the back heartily, looking over at Road (Kyoko), narrowing his eyes as he scowled. His mouth folded into a frown and his forehead creased with concentration. Then he smiled brightly, and somewhat facetiously.

"Hello, Kyoko-san." He said, stressing her name, as if he was implying that he didn't believe her story for a minute. "You know, I was surprised when I saw you and Allen together. I said to myself, 'how on earth could Allen possibly get such a beautiful girl as you?'" he said loudly, laughing at Allen's embarrassment. Yeah. This was the same old Cross as ever. Not an ounce of gentility or refinement.

"Oh… We're not really…" Road began shyly, blushing under Cross's stare, feeling like he was looking right through her. He interrupted her, though.

"Then I realized what it was about you that was bugging me. You look really familiar!" he said. It would look to anyone passing by as though they were just having a normal, albeit loud, conversation.

"I-I don't believe we've ever met, Mr…" Road said, knowing his name, but not wanting to give away any hints as to who she was, afraid that Cross already knew too much.

"Cross. Marion Cross. Are you sure that we've never met? I have never once forgotten the face of a beautiful woman, and I don't get the feeling that I would start now. Perhaps it was that time in Arkansas?" he asked, stressing the 'ark' in it. Allen gulped, now rigid as a board.

"Don't worry, Allen, I'm not here to steal your girlfriend. Perhaps I could talk to you after church, though. We have much to catch up on."

"O-of course, General Cross," Allen said, groaning. Finally, Cross left and went back to his seat, where Allen noticed he was sitting with a fairly stately woman himself. Shaking his head, he turned around as the mass started.

(A/N: I don't know how a Catholic mass goes, so if anyone out there does, please inform me, as I would be glad to add such a scene in and revise the fanfiction.)

Allen walked outside, telling Road to wait for him by the bells. He figured that it would be best if she stayed out of sight, and Cross hadn't asked if he could talk to her as well. As he approached Cross, the tall exorcist smiled and waved, beckoning for him to hurry up. Immediately after Allen got there, still slightly out of breath, Cross began.

"Allen, I'm quite shocked at your taste in women," Cross said sternly. Allen sighed and tried to not give anything away yet.

"W-what do you mean? Kyoko isn't my girlfriend, and she's very nice. She's a little bit shy, though, and you were making her nervous!" Allen said, trying to focus the attention on Cross instead of Road.

"Oh, so sorry that I upset the little Noah…" Cross said, and to Allen's dumbstruck stare, he smirked and nodded. "Oh, yes. I knew immediately when I saw her who she was. Really, Allen. Did you think that putting her in ill fitting clothes, giving her a wig and a fake identity would fool anyone? I don't think that anybody else noticed because the Noah didn't intentionally cause a scene and because nobody scrutinized her any closer than giving her a passing glance as they greeted her. I could smell the death and nihilism on her the moment she set foot in the church. Dating her is one thing. That's bad enough, but did you really have to bring her to church?"

"First of all, her hair isn't a wig. She hasn't had a haircut for over a year! Second, her name really is Kyoko! Kyoko is her birth name, though she doesn't like to use it because she hates her parents so much! Third, did you expect me to let her come to church in the filthy rags that I found her in? Yes, when I found her, she was homeless, and hadn't eaten in days. She looked close to death, and at first, I wanted to kill her, too, but I decided to take her home and HELP HER!! Isn't that the Christian thing to do!? Fourth, we're not dating, and she isn't a Noah anymore. She's a former Noah, and she wanted to come to church because she feels bad about what she's done!"

"Wow. She really has pulled one over on you, hasn't she!?" Cross said scornfully. Allen groaned and slapped his forehead.

"I don't have to account to you for my actions anymore. You aren't my master anymore, and I can't believe that you don't trust me to make my own decisions!"

"It isn't that I don't trust you, Allen. It's that I don't trust her. By the way, where is she?"

"She should be waiting by the church bell," Allen said uncertainly. Allen looked over toward the bells and found that Road was gone. Allen sighed and said goodbye to Cross, looking around for Road. When he didn't find her by the bells, he went back in and asked around if anyone had seen her. At first, he didn't get any leads, but then someone said that they had seen her go into the back where the confessionals were. Allen groaned, knowing what she was going to do, and ran back, hoping to be able to stop her before she revealed who she was, believing that the priest would keep her secret. It was true that priests were sworn to secrecy about what people told them in the confessionals, but to tell the priest that she was a Noah, and the very fact that she was in a church would be more likely to get her killed than forgiven.

"Father, I know that I'm not really Catholic. I've never had my first confession, so I don't really know what I'm doing…" Road said shyly, finding it hard not to cry, even when talking to the priest about such trivial things.

"That's alright, dear. Any child of God is welcome in his house," the priest said, calming her down slightly. He then spoke again. "Why don't we start with your name?" he suggested warmly. Road nodded. Probably he would know who she was if she told him her real name. But she was done hiding from the church. She had to make a stand now.

"Road Kamelot. It's been a long time since anyone has called me a child of God, though."

"What do you mean, Miss Kamelot?" the priest asked politely. Road sighed. Apparently, he didn't recognize her.

"Most people believe me to be the spawn of Satan, or something like that. I never believed in God or Satan before, but now I'm not so sure if I wasn't bound for Hell from the moment I was born."

"Well, nothing is decided absolutely. Everyone has within them good and evil, and the choice as to which they embrace."

"I keep trying to tell myself that, but I'm not so sure. My former master always told me that it was my destiny to serve him, and I never questioned it because it made sense."

"What made sense about it, Miss Kamelot?"

"Well, with the recrudescent memories of the Noah rising in my mind, I was so sure that I was bound permanently to the Earl."

"Oh, my. You're that Road Kamelot?" the priest asked in mild surprise. Road nodded.

"Yes. I was hesitant to come to church for fear of what people would do if they recognized me."

"Well, it was good of you to come to church, child. There is nothing for which God will not forgive you should you truly feel remorse."

"What should I do?" Road asked quietly, feeling tears filling her eyes already. The priest sighed understandingly.

"Well, you are still young, child. You still have time to turn your life around. I'm sure that your friend Allen can help you along the way. Go in peace, in the name of the father, and of the son, and of the holy spirit. Amen."

"Amen." Road replied quietly, walking out of the confessional to see Allen and General Cross standing there waiting for her. Cross had his arms crossed in front of his chest and was glaring at her suspiciously.

"Hello, Kyoko, or perhaps I should say Road Kamelot. You did pretty well disguising yourself as a normal person. Tell me… Is that a wig that you're wearing, and how did you make yourself look so skinny?" he asked suspiciously. Road looked away and sighed, yanking on some of her hair to show him that it wasn't a wig.

"This isn't a wig. And why I look how I do is none of your business…" Road said, not in a hostile tone, but certainly not in a friendly one. Cross continued to stare at Road for a moment. Then he said, "I see. Then I guess you wouldn't mind submitting to a mind scan to make sure that you aren't still dangerous?" Cross said with a smirk. A mind scan was a test run by attaching electrodes to the subject's head, and reading the electric waves that were passing through it. The waves were then translated into something that could be understood by the scientists administering the tests. Such tests were painful, though, and they sometimes caused short or long term memory loss and in rare cases permanent brain damage due to the electricity that was being sent through the electrodes.

"No, master! Those things are dangerous, and you know it! They're only used on criminals who refuse to yield to conventional interrogation. Besides, such tests are unreliable, and can often do more harm than good…" Allen said angrily, standing up and rushing over to Cross and Road again.

Road thought silently for a moment. She knew all about mind scanning machines. Not only were they dangerous, but as the memories were being scanned, the subject often felt themselves reliving the memories. She didn't want to have to relive every murder that she ever committed.

"I'll answer any questions you ask me. You can bring me anywhere you like to ask them. I refuse to submit to a mind scan, though."

"Road, are you sure about this? The Order can use some pretty extreme interrogation tactics. Just because they're religious by nature doesn't mean that they'll hold back on torturing the answers out of you," Allen said quietly. Road smiled at him. "They won't have to torture me. I'm going there of my own free will and I intend to answer all their questions honestly."

Allen groaned. Road obviously didn't know much about the Black Order. She was still a wanted criminal. Once she answered all of their questions, they would arrest her and sentence her to be executed. Cross knew that as well, but instead of telling her, he grabbed her by her upper arm and pulled her along behind him, ordering Allen to follow him.

"Road Kamelot? How long has it been since you disappeared? A year? A year and a half?"

"One year, two months, two weeks, eight days, five hours, and twenty-nine… no… thirty minutes," Road said blankly. She wasn't scared. She may have been a bit uncomfortable, but she knew that Allen was watching the interview, so she was sure that everything would go well.

"That's quite an internal clock that you have, Miss Kamelot… If that is your real name…"

Road didn't say anything to this. The man was quite sharp. He already knew that Road wasn't her real name.

"Please don't waste time attempting to build rapport. I already understand full well that you don't trust me, and that I am likely to be punished severely after you've finished interrogating me."

"Well then, if you understand that you're a criminal, how many people have you killed? A dozen? A hundred? A thousand?"

"Five thousand eight hundred seventy six men, three thousand two hundred thirty women, and too many children to count."

"Do you feel any remorse at all for the people that you've killed?" the man asked, leaning in, his sharp, angular eyes boring holes in Road's head. Road looked at him, completely unpretentiously.

"Would you believe me if I said that I did? I am human after all."

"You're not human. You're a monster!" the man spat disgustedly at Road, who merely sighed and spoke again.

"Yes, I suppose one could call me a monster, although that would be more a description of my personality, my moral compass, rather than my species."

"I heard from Cross that you've been living with Allen Walker for almost a week, now. He even took you to church with him. Did you enjoy your time with him?"

"More than you can possibly understand."

"Do you enjoy manipulating good people into taking care of you? Does it make you feel powerful?"

"Not particularly. Until Allen came along, I've never actually been taken care of by any good people, so I wouldn't really know how that felt," Road said quietly. She wasn't being sarcastic at all. She completely hated her parents, and she was well aware that Tyki's family was full of terrible people.

"What about your parents? You weren't born a Noah. You had to come from a human family."

"I did. My father was filthy rich, and obsessed with making more money and gaining more power. My mother was haughty, prideful, and vain. Neither of them even wanted me, but the Catholic church does not believe in abortions, so they had me, and left me to the maids and servants. They didn't love me, though. The only reason they took care of me was because they were paid to do it. I was only too happy to become a Noah when the time came. I searched around every so often, checking missing persons reports. My parents never even reported me missing."

"So how does Allen figure into this? What does he have to do with any of it?"

"He saved me when I was close to death."

"You were gravely injured? I don't see any scars."

"No. No major injuries. I had no place to live. I was starving. But you didn't really call me here to ask me about my recent living accommodations, did you?"

"No. I suppose I got a little bit sidetracked. My apologies, Miss Kamelot. More on point, though, why did you accept Allen's invitation to live at his house? I heard that the former Noah Tyki Mikk came into town to invite you to live with him. Yet you turned him down. Surely you would be more comfortable among those more similar to yourself."

"I feel very comfortable around Allen. He's been very kind to me since he found me, and I still am not sure that I understand why. I'm not sure if I deserve such kindness, but I'm too afraid to leave. Ever since I started staying at Allen's house, my nightmares have all but gone away. I'm safe under his roof. Today's incident at church, if you feel like calling it an incident, is proof that nobody will accept me except for him."

"I see. You're a very strange girl, Road. As a Noah, you took great delight in causing suffering and pain just like all the other Noahs, and yet, you seem not to have lost all sense of conscience."

"Conscience isn't something that you can gain or lose. It's something that you either have or that you don't have. One can suppress their conscience if they commit enough sins that such things no longer seem so horrible. However, the conscience will always be at the back of that person's mind, trying to nudge them in the right direction. Perhaps I didn't hear my conscience until it was too late."

"Ah, but concepts such as too late are all relative. What is too late, after all? Is too late after you've committed ten murders? Twenty? Thirty? Maybe too late is if you haven't repented ten minutes before your death. Or perhaps humans make their own rules about repentance and they have no bearing on whether God is willing to forgive. The Bible says that if one is truly sorry for one's sins, no matter how great, God is always willing to forgive. Unfortunately, human society doesn't work that way. Crimes must be punished, and where the state cannot punish a crime, organizations such as we must do so in their place. That being said, you do appear to truly regret your sins in the past. However, there is no way that we can let you off without some punishment. So, hopefully you will agree to this so that we don't have to put you on trial, where the punishment will most likely be death. You will continue to live with Allen Walker, and abide by the rules of his house, and by the laws of the church. Should these two sources conflict, the church's laws take precedence. Now that you are an ordinary civilian, and are still a minor, you must attend school like any other minor. You will go to the same school as Allen, and you will be expected to keep up with your work. You are not to leave the city for any reason. This sounds rather fair to me. Don't you think so?"

"Yes. Thank you. I look forward to returning to school."

"Well, first, you have to finish out the Christmas break. Christmas has not quite come yet."