Shadowing Death: Him

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Thanks again to all of my lovely reviewers. Just so everyone knows, this is officially a LIASON and Sonny/Carly story!

--- Quartermaine Mansion

Detective Taggert had stayed only a little longer after his initial bombshell, offering the story of what had happened and worthless sympathies, before leaving quietly. Before he'd gone, he'd given them a promise that he would find the one responsible for his grandson's death, but it was useless. The murderer was safe in this town. The Port Charles Police hadn't solved a crime by themselves in almost a decade.

Besides, he knew who was responsible for Jason's death.

Sonny Corinthos.

Edward shook his head, this was no time to be thinking of that hellion.

Jason had always been his pride and joy and though he'd never say it aloud, that really went for whatever incarnation of his grandson there had been at any time. Jason Quartermaine had been one of the best things in his life. Star athlete, honors student… he was one of the best Quartermaines. Edward was thrilled with the fact that Jason was so like Lila, that her kindness and sound mind, free of judging or hatred, would live on. Now, it seemed that it would die with Lila after all.

He had felt like someone had punched the air out of him when Reginald and the police had informed them of the accident, the night that he'd first lost his grandson. Jason Quartermaine had died that day.

Then, in his place, Jason Morgan came. The boy that they'd let get away. No one knew it, but he had been proud of Jason from day one. To survive that accident. to live through the aftermath and not go entirely insane? That was strength in the likes that no one else in the family had - except, perhaps, the Jason who had come before him.

Even with knowing what Jason did for a living he was still proud, in some sort of strange, partially ignorant way. Few thought of a mob territory quite like he did. The similarities between that and a boardroom? It was a business, through and through.

There was Ned and Dillon by Tracey. Justus by Bradley. Jason Morgan, Jason Quartermaine and AJ by Alan. He had six grandsons. Not five.

Now, he was down to four.

And once again, that feeling of the air being punched out of him came back to him. Except this time it was harder to shake. There was no other incarnation of Jason to make him proud coming soon. This was it. They were dead.

--- Quartermaine Mansion, Terrace

Alan sat down in the chair that Jason would occupy when he sat out on the terrace, as he had so many years ago. He remembered the whole scene. Jason was just coming home from the hospital. He was home, with his family. He had survived the accident, one that would have killed many. And the moment he got home, what did he want to do?

Sit outside on the terrace, alone, in freezing weather.

Alan looked back over things in his mind. He had no idea how to break away from the feeling that he had failed his son. Could he have seen sooner that Jason Quartermaine and Jason Morgan were different? Could he had reached out to Jason and steered him away from Sonny Corinthos?

Alan's mind screamed "no", but his heart screamed "yes".

By the time he had seen the truth, it had been too late. There was nothing he could have done to get into his son's life. He knew nothing of Jason. Not even the food like liked the best. He could count on his hands the things he knew about Jason.

He was loyal to the ones he loved.

He rode his motorcycle everywhere.

He smiled rarely.

Any friends he had ever managed to make were not the best of people all of the time, Carly, Sonny, Robin, Ned, Elizabeth Webber.

Alan's mind went to the Christmas party a few years ago. No one knew it, but he was eternally grateful to Elizabeth. Jason had come to the party to see Michael, most likely, and Elizabeth was there to be a Christmas elf. He had watched his son smile while he held the hat too high for the short girl to grab. He had been fooling around with her. Smiling, and even laughing a bit. He could see then how wrong the town was about him. His son wasn't violent all of the time. With those people. the few people, no matter how bad or good they were, Jason had been happy.

He laughed occasionally. For them. He smiled, for them. Talked to them. Fought for them.

He never once smiled Alan's way. Nor did he laugh. When talking to his father he used grunts and short worded answers. He fought with Alan, not for him.

But there was nothing he could do to change all that now, no matter how bad it hurt. Alan could feel tears start to run down his face. All he could do now was be there for the rest of the family. Monica had walked upstairs camly, but Alan could hear that the moment the door was closed she had broken down sobbing. And Emily, they would need to break the news to her from rehab. That would be the end of her stay there. He highly doubted that he could keep her away now. He shook his head as he got up.

For now, he could throw himself into helping the family. He could numb himself, but it would never change. He had once told Jason that when Jason Quartermaine had left, a part of him, the very best part, had gone with too.

He knew then that the rest of him had followed

--- Corinthos Penthouse

Sonny looked down at Carly. She had cried herself to sleep. There was nothing he could do to make this okay for her. He couldn't make it okay for anyone. There was only one person to fix this.

And he was dead.

Sonny shook his head. He couldn't think about that right now. He couldn't think about Jason. If he did then he wouldn't be able to do what needed to be done. There would be plenty of time for hating himself and missing his friend later. Sonny walked out the penthouse door and motioned to Johnny to follow him.

"Yes Boss?" Johnny questioned. He had been the one to inform all of the men of Jason's death. Most of the men loved Jason as a best friend or brother and in addition to being sad about his death, they were all ready to kill who was responsible. Not even an order from Sonny could stop them from getting revenge for Jason.

"I need you to get as many men as possible on looking into what happened. Right now I need to go tell Elizabeth Webber." Sonny said quietly. Johnny could tell that Sonny was battling for control right now.

"Okay. Do you need me to drive you?"

Sonny shook his head. "I want Francis to come. He is going to guard her from now on." He informed the loyal man. Elizabeth had Francis guarding her a many different points in time. He was hoping that she would feel better with him around, but it was a long shot.

"I'll call him." Johnny said simply. He watched Sonny close his eyes slowly and run his hand through his hair.

--- Quartermaine Mansion, Monica and Alan's Room

Monica couldn't stop the sobs from wracking her body. This was too much. How could she be expected to survive losing three kids? She had lost Dawn and Jason. And now she had lost him again.

This wasn't right.

It wasn't fair.

Jason was the one who had owned her heart for years. And he wasn't even hers by blood.

Blood.

Monica shook her head. She couldn't think of that word right now. Because it brought visions of what her son had gone through during his last moments. From what Taggert had said she gathered it wasn't an instant death. He had been awake, and even speaking to Sonny. Had it hurt much? Or was what they said about death being painless at the very end true? She hoped to God it was. For Jason. And for her sanity.

How was she going to survive this? How was Lila? Or Emily and AJ? Alan? Ned? The list went on. All of them would know how she had let her son down in so many ways.

Now she would never get the chance to make it up.

--- Elizabeth's Studio

That was it. She was going to Jason's penthouse. She had to know if he was all right. The feeling in her gut, even her soul, said he wasn't. Never in her life had she wanted their connection to be wrong more than now. She grabbed the leather jacket he had given her and headed to the doorway. She was so determined and shaky, the knock at the door nearly made her jump.

It was Jason. He had gotten her messages and decided to come here in person to tell her he was okay.

Elizabeth went to the door and threw it open. "Jason! I was worr-" she started. It wasn't Jason at the door. It was Sonny. It was Sonny covered in blood. Elizabeth looked up into Sonny's shut off eyes and knew.

"No."

Elizabeth shook her head blindly. Sonny started to come into the room as she backed away from him. "No" It was the only thought she could get her mind around.

"I'm so sorry Elizabeth. You have no idea how sorry I am." Sonny said quietly. He was well aware about their feelings about each other. Jason and Elizabeth loved each other. It was obvious to everyone but them.

"No. You're lying." Elizabeth whispered, uncomprehendingly. Her heart screamed that Sonny was playing a trick, but everything in her knew it wasn't a lie.

"He showed up out of nowhere at the church I was at. It was like he knew. The gun went off and he threw himself on me." Sonny started to explain. He didn't know why he was still speaking. Maybe it was more for him than her.

"You were supposed to protect him. You're his friend Sonny. You were supposed to look out for him… because he doesn't look out for himself." Elizabeth whispered. She needed someone to blame. She knew it wasn't Sonny's fault - that Jason would die for him, that he had signed up for this, but she still needed to blame someone.

"I know." Sonny said as he hung his head in shame.

"He's not gone. Oh god, he can't be. How could this happen? I knew something was wrong. I knew it. But I didn't think… " Elizabeth said, unaware that she was babbling.

"We were more than friends. He was my more than friend. Is! He is my more than friend. He isn't dead. No. I need him. He knows that. Right? He knows that?" Elizabeth said. She was staring at one spot on the floor. Her arms were hugging her shaking body.

"He knew that." Sonny said, in the hopes of being comforting. He had to get out of there. Everything she was saying was true. He didn't want to deal with it. This was punishment. God had taken the one person to stand by him no matter what.

Elizabeth started to sink to the floor. There was so much she didn't say. Did he know? He would never really know. She had waited too long. They had danced around each other too much. She had waited too long. He was dead. Jason was gone. She didn't get to tell him how she felt. She didn't get to kiss him. She wouldn't get to do that. He was dead. No, she didn't feel it.

But it was true. Sonny was covered in blood. He had died of a gunshot wound. Was it in the same spot as the last time? No. He was dead. It didn't matter. Nothing did. The only thing that should have mattered was that he knew.

He wouldn't.

He wouldn't know she loved him.

Up until that very moment she wasn't even aware of it.

The room went to black as Sonny caught her.

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