Disclaimer- All things Harry Potter belong to JKR
Author Note:
Thank you all SOOOOO much for the reviews!!!
I've been having a grand ol' time with the Marauders so far, but...They sure are hard to keep up with!
In all honestly, I'm having trouble thinking up pranks worthy of Marauder-ness. Any ideas are MORE than welcome..!
Send me your best!!
Chapter 4
A Moony Chapter.
Remus Lupin was tired.
Well, he was always tired, considering his condition, but this was different.
"Padfoot! Breakfast ends in 15 minutes, and if you think I'm saving you some of those waffles you like again, you're positively insane."Remus said, shaking his friend. Actually, we've got about three hours to eat, but it's always better to think ahead, He thought.
It was early on a Monday morning, so this was typical Sirius Black behavior. Peter rubbed his eyes and yawned, putting on his socks.
"Five more minutes, Moony. Merlin, you're like that muggle contraption. What's it called again?" Sirius whined. "The energizer bunny. You're both furry at times, so we can all see the resemblance."
Remus frowned, checking his watch again. He strolled over towards his own bed. Picking up his bag, he turned back to his sleepy friend.
"Fine. I, the 'energizer bunny' am leaving."Remus walked out the door.
"Thank Merlin."Sirius said, stretching out onto his bed.
Peter looked at Sirius and looked at the door, as if deciding which was more important, friendly loyalty or waffles. He stood up, grabbing his own bag, when Remus walked casually back in.
"Forgot my quill." Remus said, nonchalantly. "And by the way, Padfoot?"
"For the sake of all things magic, What Moony?" Sirius said, sitting up and fuming.
"Frank told me the waffles are excellent today." Remus said, grinning. "I might just eat my fill and...forget to retrieve you some."
"...You wouldn't dare, Moony Lupin."
Rushing down the stairway, Remus cackled loudly. To which a certain Sirius Black replied by roaring, leaping out of bed and rushing to put on his shoes.
Remus walked out of Gryffindor Tower with a huge grin on his face. Today was apparently a good day. He only had to push Sirius out of bed twice and bellow at the top of his lungs four times, which was a new record. Remus turned the corner and walked down the flight of stairs. Maybe, just maybe today would be the day.
Alice Kitly.
Alice was a regular at the Hogwart's library. Remus always saw her on Tuesdays and Fridays, huddled in the back corner by the divination section.
The quiet section.
His section.
No one in their right minds visited the Divination Section to actually work. Well, except for Dave Brown. Brown was a nutter anyway, so he didn't really count. The couples who wanted a snogging area didn't count either. To Remus, the library was somewhat of a holy place. If they wanted to suck face, they could skip on up to the Astronomy Tower for all he cared. No one went their either, except for...well..romantic reasons.
What ever happened to learning?
Anyway, Alice and Remus always studied together on those Tuesdays and Fridays. Most of the time, they were the only free time he got from Marauder Madness. James, Peter and Sirius were his mates, but sometimes he just needed some alone time. Time just for school work.
...Yes.
Just for school work.
...Ahem.
Remus walked down an empty corridor, getting closer to the Great Hall. He started to jog, thinking about those waffles. Honestly, they were just bloody amazing. Those house elves had outdone themselves. Remus hummed as he neared the staircase. Sirius should be up and about soon, and Peter was probably already down there. How, Remus did not know, but Peter always managed to beat him downstairs for breakfast. That left one marauder unaccounted for. Where was James, anyway? Did he get lost on his way downstairs? For he did do that last week on the way down to-
"Snuff it!!"
"Evans, PLEASE!!!"
Oh.
Never mind. There he is.
Remus looked to his left, intrigued. There inside the deserted Transfiguration classroom, was his friend James Potter. And-surprise, surprise-Lily Evans.
"Potter!! I don't want to hear another WORD out of your Throat!!!"She screeched. "All I wanted was to get down to breakfast in peace and you DRAG me in here and spit out useless-"
"HEY!!!! Useless!?!?"
"What did you call them again? Oh, 'charming words' and all sorts of-"
"That's not nice, Miss. Evans! You owe me an apology."James said, grinning.
"Apology!? APOLOGY!??! You owe ME an apology, you Prick!"
Uh oh, Remus thought. Her face matches her hair now.
"-Dragging me in here and...And...UGH!! Potter!! You're Creepy!"
James stood there, still grinning, Why? Remus does not know.
"You love me, Evans."
"If you would stop trying to woo me I'd-" She stopped. "...WHAT?!!?"
"You looooove me, Evans, don't you" James said, stepping towards her. "Say I'm your number one!"
Lily, it appeared, had nothing to say.
"...Evans? Say something, I mean, I want to share the air that you breathe. You won't-"
"YOU!!! YOU, YOU, YOU IDIOT!!!" Lily, Remus noticed, was now long gone. "Why would you say something like that??!?!?!"
"Because.." James sputtered, scared of her rage now.
Remus walked away, the faster the better. He was no longer safe here, with the famous Evans rage triggered and all. No Marauder in a five meter radius was safe.
"AAAAAARRRRRGHHHHH!!!"
Nope.
Not far away enough.
Remus sprinted down the rest of the corridor. He rushed towards the corner as fast as possible, passing a few bewildered students.
"Who's screaming?"
"...Sounds like Potter molested Evans again."
"Good Merlin, will he ever give up?"
"...nope."
How right they were, Remus thought. He ran around the corner, still in fear of his life. Remus just turned the corner, when BAM! Quills, parchment and ink bottles flew everywhere.
"Oh my! I'm so sorry! I wasn't watching where I was headed." Remus apologized and looked at the other victim. She almost made him drop his books all over again.
"No, Remus. It's okay...No blood, no bruise." Alice laughed, picking up her Muggle Studies text. "So...how are you on this fine morning? Haven't seen you since Friday." Her eyes twinkled.
"I'm fine, I suppose." Remus grinned. Oh, Merlin. Her eyes are gorgeous.
"Well, that's good."She smiled. "You're better than James is going to be in a few minutes. Lily's really fed up today, I hear."
"Is she ever Not fed up with Prongs?"
"...No, but today seems to be a special case." Alice snickered. "Did he say something gooey?"
"Erm, Gooey?"
"You know." Alice said, gesturing with her hands.
"..I don't know what you-" Remus stopped, blushing. "Oh. Well, he said...that he wanted to share the air that she breathes, if that's what you're looking for."
Alice burst out laughing.
"Really!??! Wow. The guts on that guy..."
"I know. Sometimes, I can't believe that I even speak with him..."Remus joked.
"Poor Lily. The things she has to put up with on a Monday morning..."Alice giggled. "Well, I best be off. Don't want to be late."
"Oh! Well, nice speaking with you, Alice." Remus said, smiling. "Be careful walking down that way. Flying debris."
She walked slowly down the hall, laughing all the way. Remus grinned to himself. This isn't a bad morning. Not a bad morning at all.
"She hates me."James grumbled at the breakfast table. "She bloody hates me."
"Prongsy, my boy. She doesn't Hate you." Sirius said, chomping on a waffle. "She...strongly dislikes you."
"And there's a difference?"
"OBVIOUSLY, or the other phrase wouldn't exist, you dolt."
"...Moony. You're more supportive than him." James wailed. "Say something."
Remus paused.
"Erm...Well, at least she didn't...uh...hex you this time." He guessed.
"Moony, that's absolutely Right!!" Prongs leaped off his seat. "She only threatened to dismember me! That MUST be a good sign!"
"..."
"Prongsy, old pal, did she throw anything at you? A bezoar? Or something equally heavy?" Sirius said, curious. "Because I think you've lost it again. AND you got this funny imprint on your forehead."
James touched his head.
"Oh, that's just from last time when she threw a muggle toaster oben at me."
"Where'd she get the oben?"Peter said, excited. "I've been meaning to invest in one, but I can't find one around here..."
"You need to find yourself a girl, Worntail." Sirius murmured. "Toaster obens are...are...well, just not marauderly. You need a more manly muggle-y thing. Moony?"
"...A muggle-y thing, Padfoot?" Remus looked at his friend, bewildered.
"Yes, Moony." Sirius said, as if it was obvious. "You know all about muggles. Pick a manly muggle-y thing. Something that SOUNDS manly."
"...Flashlight?"
"EXACTLY!!! It says 'look at me! I'm flashy!' AND it sounds slightly sexy so the birds'll love it." Sirius shouted.
Peter was in awe.
"Where can I get this...fwashligh?"
"For the love of Merlin!!" James cried. "Let's get back to me! My problems!"
"..Nope. Sorry, Prongsy." Sirius said, seriously. "Don't feel like it."
"But you're supposed to be SUPPORTIVE!!" James said, peeved. "You're my mates!!"
"Yes. That's an absolutely spiffy point to make." Sirius said, faking support. "BUT- We're not married."
The marauders fell silent while Sirius continued to eat away at the waffles.
"What does that have to do with the situation?"Remus wondered.
"My dear Moony. It has absolutely nothing to do with anything." Sirius grinned. "It just sounded amusing to say."
Remus rolled his eyes, murmuring while drinking the remains of his pumpkin juice.
"Now, now, Moony-kins. Keep that up and they'll fall out."
"...Shove it."
The marauders continued to argue, not paying full attention to the devastated Frank Longbottom who slumped down next to them.
"Hullo." He said, miserably. "Pass the waffles please, Remus."
Sirius objected to this.
"NOOOO!!!! My precious!!!" Sirius said, grabbing the plate.
"Honestly, Padfoot." Remus sighed, and pried the waffles from his friend. "Here Frank."
James did not seem to care about the goings on of Frank and slumped down into his own seat, pausing to look in Lily's direction every few minutes. He was lost in his own thoughts. Sirius was quite the opposite. His short attention span drifted from the loss of waffles to Frank's apparent woe.
"Yo, Frank-o!!" Sirius said, patting him on the back. "Did those first years hex your undergarments again?"
"...No."
"Steal your shoes?"
"(sigh)...no."
"Mutilate your toad."
"...no." Frank moaned. "It's Alice."
Remus stiffened. Alice? What about Alice?
"Did SHE steal your shoes? Because, honestly, that's kind of awkward." Sirius continued. "She's got her own girly shoes..."
"...She broke it off."
Remus was in shock.
Frank shuffled around in his seat.
"She was just walking to her Muggle Studies class. You know how she likes to get there super early. All I did was offer to carry her books and walk her there, but no. She said that we needed to talk. Apparently, her load is too much for her right now."
"Mate, that's code for 'I'm a lesbian.' "Sirius said, seriously.
"...Not now, Padfoot." Remus said, attempting to comfort Frank.
Alice.
She broke it off. RIGHT after she spoke with me, Remus thought, excited.
...Could it be...?
"She COULDN'T be a Lesbian!!!" Frank cried. "Alice HATES confrontation like that!!!"
James suddenly sat up, eyes wide.
"...Lily likes confrontation." He said. "She always screams at me..right to my face..!"
"Prongs, I doubt it's the same-"Remus started.
"OH MY GOD, PRONGSY!!!" Sirius screeched. "LILY EVANS!!! SHE!!!"
"No!!"Remus said. He was frightened for his life all over again, and it wasn't even time for his first class.
"I'm going to go ask her RIGHT NOW!!!" James raced out of his seat.
"WAIT, PRONGSY!! I'm WITH YOOOU ALL THE WAY!!!" Sirius said, following.
"Erm... ME TOO!!!!" Peter said, trailing behind.
Frank just looked at the others, bewildered.
"What did I say?"
"...Absolutely nothing, Frank." Remus said, sadly. "Blueberry Tart?"
"EVANS!!! HEY EVANS!!!"