Eva Kasumi 01/29/07
I know, I know, I'm sorry, I fail. No more false promises, I swear. From now on, expect the next chapter when you see it. I sincerely am sorry about the delay(s), and if you're still reading this at all then thank you for sticking with me. It's more than I deserve.


Lead Me Not Into Temptation

Part Four : Hysteria

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Ephraim hadn't been gone that long. A week, at most – Forde's whining and Kyle's more respectful urgings had ensured that. And it wasn't like he had really missed anything; he was hardly needed, what with Eirika running Renais so smoothly all on her own. Ephraim was king, and so long as he wasn't abandoning his people, he had every right to go on the occasional trip. Besides, he was performing a much-needed duty out there, hunting down monsters and protecting his people.

Even so, he delayed until his party arrived back at Renais well after sunset, and then attempted to sneak through the halls to his bedroom without actually looking like he was sneaking. By taking back routes and avoiding lit doorways, he managed to arrive at his destination without having seen anyone but a few surprised servants. He breathed a sigh and turned the knob of his door, knowing that he was safe, at least until morning.

"Ephraim." Eirika said, and her tone told him right away that she was Not Happy. "Where have you been?"

Or not.

"Do you know how difficult it's been to make it seem as though you didn't just up and leave in the middle of all your guests' arrivals? Half of them believe they've simply missed seeing you around – you're lucky most of them only just arrived! L'Arachel thinks you're avoiding her."

Ephraim pinched the bridge of his nose and sank resignedly into an armchair. "That's not so far from the truth."

"She says it's because you know you wouldn't be able to resist her beauty and feminine charms. It's very gentlemanly of you not to allow yourself the temptation."

"Ah," said Ephraim.

"And where have you been, if not actively depriving yourself of the temptation that is our L'Arachel?"

"Out."

Eirika's glare didn't waver.

He shifted. "Monster hunting," he amended, somewhat dully.

"And how many monsters, pray tell, did you find?"

"Uh… three."

There was a pause.

"We also weeded out a nest of bandits in the mountains?" He hadn't intended for it to be a question, but somehow it came out that way.

"Ephraim," his sister said slowly, "Perhaps the reason you're finding so few monsters is because this is the third time you've been out hunting in as many months. It's been ten years since they stopped appearing! You've weeded them out! There's barely any left! You're taking jobs away from all the honest mercenaries who have to earn their living."

"I thought we hired all the mercenaries."

"There will always be those who would rather earn wages in their own time than be on the payroll and at the beck and call of the government. But that's not the point! The point is that you went gallivanting off with next to no warning, at the most inconvenient time you could possibly have done so and with absolutely no thought to whether or not you might be concerning those around you!"

"Eirika, I left word with the stewards before I went and anticipated being back before too many people arrived for the festivities. Besides, you knew I had Kyle and Forde and several of my other best men out there, so there was really no cause for you to worry–"

"Damned if I'm not going to worry about you!" she snapped, and he silenced immediately.

Eirika took a deep breath and began again in a softer voice. "It's not that I'm worried about your safety, Ephraim. I know you can take care of yourself - you know I trust you in that. I'm worried about the fact that you feel the need to make these excursions on a monthly basis. This is clearly about something more than simply cleansing the land of monsters. What is it, Ephraim? What are you trying to escape from?"

"Nothing; it's not like that. Really, Eirika, you're overreacting; it was just a couple of trips, necessary for the protection of the country."

"You can't fool me, Brother! You didn't used to just up and abandon your people - your family - for no good reason. Innes thinks you're being entirely irresponsible, and in this case I'm rather inclined to agree with him."

"I thought he got over this whole rivalry thing when he married you," muttered Ephraim.

"Mostly, but I suspect he's jealous that I've been spending the whole week worrying about you," she sighed. "Really, brother. You're so… restless. I hate to see you this unhappy."

Ephraim's lack of argument and the way he avoided his sister's gaze was confirmation enough.

"Perhaps," Eirika ventured thoughtfully after a pause, "you need to get married."

He raised an eyebrow. "You don't really want me getting married, sister dear, because then you wouldn't get to be Queen of Renais and Frelia anymore."

Eirika gave him a look that clearly said, 'Stop avoiding the subject.' He winced.

"Ephraim…" She sighed and collapsed into an armchair next to him. "It's not that I care whether you get married or not, you know that. But I think you want to. You want something. You're not happy; you spend half your time off on trips that aren't necessary, hunting down monster remnants from the War that aren't really there but you go anyway just to make sure. Just to get out of here and give yourself something to do. You feel like you're missing something, don't you?"

"You sound like Mother," he muttered, and instantly regretted it.

Eirika's face fell and she looked at her hands. "Don't say that," she whispered.

Ephraim swung around and took her hands in his own. "Eirika, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that," he said earnestly, "Neither you nor Mother have ever intended anything but the best for me."

"I'm not trying to nag," she insisted, "I just want you to be happy, Brother. And I know Mother would, too."

The prince of Renais sighed and leaned back again. "I know," he mumbled, "I know. And you're right. I just... I don't know what I want. I do feel like I'm missing something - but I don't know what, or why. Only that part of me feels... empty."

There was a long silence.

"Do you really think I need to get married?" he asked suddenly.

His sister regarded him carefully before she replied, "No. I think you need to find that something, whatever it is, that will make you happy. Something that you love, that seems worth your time, that will keep you busy. Something that requires dedication but is rewarding. Something more substantial," she added wryly, "than phantom monster hunting."

Ephraim grinned back. "Point taken. And thank you."

"I just hope you find it soon," she said.

"So do I."

---------

Their third morning there, Saleh returned to the room after a bath to find Ewan sitting in his chair, staring at the door and doing absolutely nothing. He stopped short and regarded his usually animated student with surprise. Ewan stared right back through him without appearing to see anything at all.

After a moment's hesitation, Saleh shut the door and moved further into the room, out of Ewan's line of sight. The redhead didn't blink.

Five minutes later, Ewan still hadn't moved. It took Saleh putting a hand on his forehead in concern to get an indication that Ewan was, in fact, truly present.

"I'm alright, I'm just thinking," he said.

Saleh wasn't sure he was entirely convinced. "You usually do something with your hands when you're thinking."

Ewan started at that. "I do?" he asked, blinking.

"Folding paper, rolling wax, making something. You're never still," his teacher said, smiling, "So much energy."

Ewan was looking at him now, contemplative expression still etched on his features. "I'm sorry," he said suddenly, "I took your reading chair." He stood abruptly and offered the seat to Saleh, who took it without being entirely certain why but knowing that Ewan wanted to say something more. He waited patiently for his student to continue.

"Saleh," he was asked after a minute, "Do you remember what you told me, back when we were fighting alongside Lady Eirika in the War?"

"I told you many things, Ewan. Were you thinking of something in particular?"

"You told me that the truth cannot be found in words, but in the heart. If there is trust between two people, they can see the truth in each others' hearts."

Saleh smiled. "And you still remember that. You truly are a dedicated student."

Ewan planted his hands on both arms of the chair and looked directly into his companion's eyes. "Do you trust me, Saleh?"

"Of course I do."

Burgundy eyes stared into his, roving, searching, for a long time. He stared back complacently, until finally Ewan said quietly, "I don't think you're trusting me hard enough," and turned away. "I'll be in the library if you need me."

The door didn't slam behind him on his way out, but simply shut with a rather dejected sigh.

Saleh thought he felt a migraine coming on.

---------

He wasn't in the library when Saleh needed him, nor was he anywhere that others who had seen him could suggest. Saleh could have used magic to find him, but he made it a policy to never do that unless he thought Ewan was in danger, which was certainly not the case. Ewan, it seemed, was simply avoiding him.

In all their years together, Saleh realized, he could not recall a single time when Ewan had avoided him before. ...Perhaps it was cause to worry. Saleh looked a little harder.

He finally found Ewan in - of all places - the barracks. He'd found his friend Franz and the two of them were in the middle of the barracks courtyard, engaged in the most vigorous magic-versus-metal sparring match that Saleh had ever seen.

Franz was on foot and whaling away at Ewan with a large practice lance. The mage – who was smaller than Franz, but just barely – danced backwards, dodging most of the blows by a hair's breadth as he tried to get out of the volley and into some open space where he could fight back. Finally Franz made a jab that was too high, and Ewan dropped into a crouch and swept his feet out from under him before jumping out of range. He summoned up a fire spell, but the knight rolled out of the way before it struck and was up and charging at Ewan in an instant.

When he was a lance-length away, the mage darted forward and in a handspring vaulted himself over his friend's head, a move Saleh recognized as having been learned from Joshua. Most of the gathered crowd seemed either impressed or amused. Ewan quickly followed it up by jabbing his elbow into Franz's back before he could turn around, sending him stumbling. The knight lurched forward and spun around in time to see that Ewan had summoned three fireballs and was juggling them from hand to hand, grinning wildly.

He flung the first one at Franz, who pulled his lance up and blocked it. The fire dissolved where it struck the reinforced wood. Franz looked at Ewan and grinned right back.

Ewan took the challenge and threw the next one, simultaneously calling up three more that danced around his head. Franz spun the lance like a staff and blocked it again, and again. The redhead tried aiming low and singed his friend's boot, but it wasn't enough to make him trip, and he kept blocking. Ewan summoned four fireballs and flung them all at once.

Franz put both hands at the center of his lance and spun it. The whirling circle it created deflected all four fireballs, and he kept spinning it as he advanced on Ewan. The mage eyed the whirring lance warily, not seeing any safe way of easily over, under, or around it to get at Franz from behind. There really only seemed to be one thing for it.

He summoned one last fireball and aimed it directly at the hands in the center of the lance's spinning circle. Franz let out a curse of pain when it struck and the spinning slowed, continuing only because of its great momentum. But though the rhythm had been lost, Franz used the last of this momentum to swing the lance around and lunge at Ewan unexpectedly, just as Ewan jumped to tackle him.

The length of the lance connected with Ewan's side and knocked him half out of the air, so that he landed on Franz at an angle and they both went down in a flailing mass of limbs where neither had the upper hand. They disentangled themselves and lay on their backs, laughing and panting at the same time.

"Draw?" asked Ewan.

"Draw," Franz agreed, grinning.

Ewan climbed to his feet first and held out a hand to pull up his friend. Franz took it, grinning, and spotted Saleh over Ewan's shoulder as they stood joking about something. When he mentioned this to Ewan, the redhead turned around so fast he nearly got whiplash. Franz almost laughed, but instead watched Ewan with a grin and a curious glint in his eye.

The mage managed to trip twice on his way across the courtyard to Saleh, though he caught himself both times and pretended he'd done it on purpose. "Saleh!" he beamed upon reaching his teacher, "Lovely weather we're having, isn't it?"

Saleh stared at him.

"Well, I think it is – maybe you don't think so; I know it's hotter here than we're used to up in the mountains, but there's not a cloud in the sky and Franz says there's a lake; we could go swimming. I don't think I've ever seen you swim, Saleh. Do you know how? I could teach you, if you like; it'd be lots of fun!" He knew he was babbling. He was babbling and he couldn't seem to stop.

"Are you... drunk?" asked Saleh incredulously.

Ewan grinned at him. "What if I am?" he quipped, sounding exceptionally lucid for a drunk.

Saleh regarded him carefully. "You can't be - I just watched you spar. You did brilliantly."

"Oh," said Ewan. He looked somehow disappointed. "I could get smashed and try again, if you'd prefer."

"...Are you sure you're feeling alright?"

"No," said Ewan, "I'm not." Then he collapsed.

Saleh wanted to curse his name as he carried him all the way back to their room (with the help of magic, admittedly, because Ewan wasn't that light anymore), but somehow he just couldn't bring himself to. He settled for kissing his forehead instead.

He didn't notice Ewan's smile.

---------

The next morning saw the return of Ewan's usual chipper morning self, to the dismay of many in the dining hall (and some who hadn't even made it that far). It also heralded the arrival of Tethys and company. Ewan was the first one at the door after the steward brought word that they had entered the palace gates. He hugged his sister, tackled and was pummeled by Gerik, knocked Joshua's hat askew, and wisely switched an enthusiastic hug for Marissa into a bow at the last second.

"You're late!" the mage crowed at his sister, "Everyone else is already here!"

"Everyone?" Joshua asked him, "Are you sure?"

"That's quite a claim," added Tethys, tweaking Ewan's nose.

"Close enough to everyone!" he insisted, ducking out of her reach, "I can't think of any we're missing off the top of my head. Well, except for Rennac, but just because I haven't seen him doesn't mean he's not here."

"Ah, yes, Rennac," Tethys mused.

"That scoundrel owes me money," grumbled Gerik.

Joshua laughed and slapped him on the back. "You'll have to win it back from him, my friend. Good luck to you with that. And don't let him use his dice."

"I know better than that from you."

The Jehannian king chuckled. "I should hope so!"

Gerik ignored him, offering his arm to Marissa instead (who took it with an air that suggested she understood what she was supposed to be doing with it but didn't quite understand why). "Well," he said to the party, "Shall we?"

Joshua shook his head. "Actually, I've got something I need to do first. You go on ahead; I'll find my own way."

Gerik shrugged as his king vanished down the halls. "Tethys?"

"I'd like to catch up with my brother," she said, standing on tiptoe to sling an arm over his shoulders with a grin. "I'll see you guys later."

"Don't mother the poor kid too badly," Gerik grinned back, then left with Marissa to scope out their quarters.

Tethys looked at her brother expectantly. Twenty-three years old, and every time he saw her he acted like he was thirteen again. It never failed.

"Come on, Tethys, I have to show you the gardens. They're amazing!"

"Ewan, I've been here before," she laughed, but allowed herself to be dragged off and haphazardly led around the maze as Ewan searched in vain for the clearing with the willow tree. Finally she took pity on him and led the way, smirking all the while at his disgruntled face.

"Right," she said, when they'd reached their destination and she was sprawled inelegantly on the bench. "Spill."

Ewan didn't even bother to pretend that he didn't know what she was talking about. "Alas!" he cried, raising an arm to his forehead and swooning dramatically, "There is nothing to tell!" He collapsed backwards onto the grass and twitched.

"All this free time and luxurious living and he still doesn't have a libido?" his sister drawled.

"Tethys!" he groaned, but it was only a halfhearted protest.

"Even with all these gorgeous women around?"

Ewan lifted his head and glared at her. She sighed.

"Have you jumped him yet?"

"No!" Indignant.

"Have you told him yet?"

"No!" This one sounded more like a squeak.

Tethys made a clucking noise and rolled off the bench to sit next to him on the grass. "I mean it about the pretty girls. He can't expect you not to notice all the beauty around here."

"But I don't," Ewan insisted. When his sister glared at him, he rolled his eyes and amended, "Not like that, I mean."

Tethys shrugged. "Saleh doesn't need to know that. You've got all the reason in the world to be looking after your own interests, particularly if he's not going to play. There's plenty of girls who'd be happy to. Flirt a little." Catching sight of Ewan's consternated expression, she clarified, "Make him jealous."

"Saleh jealous still wouldn't do anything! He'd smile and wish me well and that would be the end of it. He never gives a thought to his own happiness. His selflessness is one of the things I love most about him." He sighed; rolled onto his stomach. "One of the things I love, but also one I hate."

Tethys patted his shoulder. "That's why it's a good thing he has you, to look out for his happiness for him."

"I wish he had me," Ewan muttered, dropping his chin onto his folded forearms. "Saleh's about as sexually attracted to me as he is to his breakfast."

"The bacon should be jealous," observed Tethys.

"I'm jealous of the bacon!" moaned her brother, "At least it's had physical contact with his mouth."

"And his digestive tract."

Ewan waved a dismissive hand. "Details. At this point I'd even welcome that."

"Oh, ew. That's really more than I needed to know," complained Tethys, poking him in the ribs. "But really, I think you need to go for it. I won't say 'no more beating around the bush' because, to further that analogy, Saleh is practically a twig and being aggressively forward would probably break his moral/asexual little mind. But don't pretend you aren't putting advances on him, because, I tell you, if ever there were a time and a place for it," she spread her hands wide about her and grinned, "This is it."

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I also must apologize for the quality of this chapter, since it is horrendously bad for the time it took to write it (the fact that it was being a bitch is part of why it took so long). This chapter really, really bothers me, but I couldn't figure out what was wrong with it or what to do about it, and I thought I'd delayed long enough. Next chapter is half-written, and I'm trying my hardest to make it turn out better than this.
Constructive crit, particularly on plot/character development, would be divine.