A/N: Big ol' shout-out to the two lovely humans who reviewed chapters two and three. Missy and I appreciate it! This one's for y'all.

Once again, our plucky heroine stood outside the chamber of one of her faithful comrades, this time fearing the impending prospect of awkwardness with her next sexapade, a lad by the name of Mori. He had many pros on his card, but left something to be desired…

Mori:

Pros:

BIGGER! (As in bigger dick for you slow people)

HAWT

A gentleman

More self-confidence

Caring

Protective

He'd use a condom

He'd serve you breakfast

Cons:

Too quiet (this counts double against him)

Awkward

Too strong

You'd be self-conscious

Unreadable

Her night's lover silently opened the door to his room, silently beckoning her inside. Inside the room, that is.

"Well, hi, Mori-senpai…"

"Mm."

"Are you—"

He cut her off with a firm kiss.

"Oh," she murmured softly as he broke away. Stroking her exposed arms, he led her to his bed, taking great care not to squish her as he climbed on top of her, shorts brushing against her thighs. He reached for the top button of her collared shirt.

"May I?" She nodded, heart racing. Maybe, just maybe, this time she wouldn't have to fake an orgasm.

He undid the first few buttons slowly as his sweet breath warmed her neck. When he exposed enough to see her bra, his eyes widened at the ocean-themed pattern.

"Mori likey seashells…"

Well, thought Haruhi, It's better than Turkey in the Straw.

She could feel his growing erection through the layers of clothes between them. Clothes that she suddenly wanted off.

As she struggled to tug off Mori's shorts, they heard a voice chirp out from somewhere behind them. "Having fun, are we?"

Mori growled; Haruhi twitched.

Renge sniffed. "Do I smell rose petals?"

Mori smiled, nodding once before returning to his position atop the teenager. The other one, I mean. Not Renge. Ew.

"Anyway, I'm just here to collect your report on Tamaki's lovemaking 'skillz,' as Ryoka put it…"

Haruhi gritted her teeth. "I'm kinda busy right now, Renge."

"Oh well," the girl said, and promptly exited the room with a flourish.

Thankfully, Mori wasn't the type to ask questions.

"Sorry about that," said Haruhi, thinking bitterly that Renge had killed the mood.

"Mmm."

Haruhi resumed what she was trying to do before—take his shorts off. Then something occurred to her as he began pawing her breasts through her bra… shouldn't the shirt come off first, or what? What was she doing wrong here? It felt like sex should be happening, or…

Wait, slow down gurrrrrl. The clothes have to come off first. Start with his shirt…

Right. She tugged his shirt over his head, and (with his help) managed to get his shorts off, too.

Now Haruhi's clothes had to come off. Mori had the honor of doing THAT. He slid the button-down off her shoulders, smoothly pulling off the skirt she had on.

Now they were both stripped down to their underwear, lying there with Mori on top and Haruhi wondering just what the hell would come next.

Reaching under her back, Mori searched for her bra clasp, finding it within a few minutes ("It's in the front, senpai"). He wrenched the bra off, admiring her perky boobies before goin' down on that beotch.

He took her left breast in his mouth, massaging it with his tongue while his right hand worked the right boob. Haruhi was somewhat taken aback by this gesture of intimacy.

Haruhi wasn't sure what to do in return—should she lick his elbow, or what?

No, she decided against THAT.

He eventually moved down south, working her harder than Tamaki did, with all four fingers all up in there. Yup, he shoved 'em right in. Practically made a fist.

"Muhhhhhh…. Muhhhhhhhh…" she moaned, finding pleasure in his ministrations.

He rose abruptly, pulling off his shorts and tossing them somewhere in the recesses of his apartments.

While he was at it, he went and removed his boxers, too, revealing a rather impressive package deal.

Mori was the original "Moby Dick".

He returned to his position relative to Haruhi. He stroked the inside of her thigh, sending erotic shivers up her spine. He knew just how to please a woman in the simplest ways, he thought, as he positioned himself over her entrance, lowering slowly.

Fireworks erupted inside of Haruhi, her eyes locked on his as he fucked her, this time not to the tune of "Turkey in the Straw".

He went faster and faster, sinking in hilt-deep, with Haruhi's nails digging into his back.

There was no need to fake an orgasm this time.

"OOOOOoooOOOOOoooOOOOwAAAAAAA aaaaaAAAAAAAooooOOOOOOOOOOO…"

He went faster… Fast, but gentle…

"MOOFMOOFMOOFMOOFMOOFMOOF…"

He pumped harder… harder, passionately…

And then

"SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

They pulled away just long enough for them both to catch her breath, before Mori took her once more in his arms, planting a gentle kiss on her forehead. She drifted off like this.

Good thing you didn't need words to be a great fucker.

Mori didn't want to admit it—he had figured that the sex was something Haruhi was doing because Renge was making her. He didn't care at the time, thinking that even if he couldn't have her forever, he could at least have her this one night.