This chapter is dedicated (i do like this dedication thing i'm going to keep it going) to my father,
who helped me with my last chapter; one thing i have always lacked is general knowledge and he has always been my source. that chapter was no exception, besides he is sarcastic, ironic and pessimistic, and most of all hilarious, i strive to be like him.
I was sitting at the top of the stairs with the window cracked open, outside I could see my back garden. It was 4am, September the 11th, 2013, exactly a year after I had first met the Doctor, my mum had just fallen asleep. As I sat, with an ear out for the familiar whoosh of the Tardis I thought about Clara, and worried about her, and worried even more so about him.
I fiddled with the sonic ring on my thumb, leaning closer to inspect the tiny gold plating that formed part of the miniscule circuitry. As if summoned like a genie in a bottle, the sound of wind became a little like breathing, and I peered out to see a box, a box that was the bluest of blues appear amongst the shrubbery. I ran down the stairs, taking two at a time, which is hard for someone so small, only remembering when I reached the bottom that I had to be quiet. I peered back up and listened intently but my parents didn't stir. Then I continued into the back garden as the doors of the Tardis opened and The Doctor poked his head out "Hello!"
"Hiya monk man" I said and without being invited pushed past him into the spaceship.
"Why do you care so much that I am a monk?'
"Because you're not, at least you shouldn't be, I mean you never were before, oh great, I've started to sound like you!"
"What's wrong with me?"
"Nothing, well except you are a monk now, which just doesn't suit you, monks are patient, sensible, reserved, I'm not saying it's a bad thing, I'm saying it's not you, I mean you're not even wearing a bowtie!"
"Yes" he sighed, rubbing his lower neck "one does come to miss it."
"Right well, we need to do something interesting, because you are boring and I'm just bored, only had one more alien attack, and I'm scared to say that soon I might start looking forward to them."
"Ok then, where do you want to go, another planet, star system, back in time, forward in time? We literally have the whole universe at our fingertips!" He said lovingly patting the console.
"As I said before Doctor, I don't need to be attacked by more aliens"
"Well then where can we go?"
"We don't have to GO anywhere, we can stay in here, there is a whole world crammed into this place and you hardly ever leave the control room"
"Oh all right, what do you want to do?"
"I want to go swimming!"
The, water was, cool, almost chilly, or at least it would have been were it not for the full body wetsuit I was wearing. Dozens of fishes darted in front and underneath me, all the colours in the rainbow; some were even translucent, yet as large as two outspread hands held together. I reached down to pluck some kind of sea plants that looked not dissimilar to wild violets. A flash of colour burst out as a large family off tropical looking sea horses scattered then returned to their original positions from before I had unintentionally disturbed their home.
I resurfaced, still tasting the saltwater in my mouth. "What are those transparent fish called?" I called out to the doctor who was climbing up to the diving board. "Nevidbalón from Koulobloh, they're actually amphibians like your frogs, except they fly not jump, well they don't actually fly" he was still climbing "they are incredibly light and so on hot days turn themselves inside out, kinda in the shape of a balloon" he kept climbing, he was so high up now he had to yell " water vapour carries them up into the clouds, they then mate and when it rains" he was at the top " they dive" and he dove himself, falling so very far. I wasn't worried though, there was a built in wind tunnel that slowed his descent, allowing him to flip over in the air several times and yell "Geronimo" before he hit the water, even so it was a very large splash.
A huge wave billowed from the point of impact and completely submerged me. I surfaced coughing "Doctor!" And he popped up out of the water like a seal "sorry!" His usually immaculate quiff hung over his forehead and I chuckled as he pushed the messy mop of hair back from his face. "I still can't believe you are wearing that, where did you get it?" I was gesturing at his wetsuit that in contrast to the simple black of mine had been painted to look like his usual suit and bow tie. "I won it in a game of Cluedo against a funny little chap from Phalataraxophorius."
"Cluedo really?"
"Really really, it was fantastic!"
"I bet it was, why don't you wear your real suit you know, get back out there, go looking for her"
A single creature resembling a dolphin but oily black in colour slid past us.
"I'm a monk now, monks are cool" he ignored the last part of my question.
"No they are not, and if you were really a monk for good surely you would be wearing an ugly brown swimsuit? Or even just swimming in your robes"
"I can't swim in my robes, they're too heavy and a brown swimsuit would be silly"
"Ok here's the real question Doctor, will you be a monk forever, live out the rest of your life as one?"
"Well I- I don't know"
"You won't Doctor, you'll find her, even if she has to find you first"
"You don't know that, you can't know that!" He yelled and the true pain of her mystery revealed itself at last.
"You said it yourself Doctor, I'm the girl who knows, the key to the future is the past, I know your past and I am not distracted by the rest of the universe whizzing round in my brain like you. I have faith that you will find her", a smile crossed my face and I got out of the enormous pool. "And I'll prove it".
I hurried back into the Tardis, shivering from the coolness of the air and my long hair that was still slightly damp from swimming. "Here it is" I passed a small, dark and ornamental wooden box over to the Doctor, I had changed back into my clothes and he was wearing his robes again. "What's this?" He looked at the box "Oh just open it" I sighed, trying to sound irritable but eagerly leaning forward to watch for his reaction. He lifted the lid and revealed a bowtie majestically displayed on a sheet of yellow velvet. It was black but with tinges of purple and red, scattered across it were small gold circle like shapes. The bowtie looked old and was slightly faded but gave the impression of an ancient heirloom, passed from generation to generation.
"Oh it's fantastic, I love it! Wherever did you get it?" He was practically jumping up and down and I laughed at his excitement "It was my great grandfather's, I found it when we were in the attic looking for Christmas supplies" then I stepped forward quickly and snapped the box shut again as I tugged it out of his hands, he automatically grabbed at the box but I darted out of the way "nuh uh uh, the gift is conditional, you can have the bowtie, if you promise to wear it when, and that's when, not if, you find Clara."
He looked at me for a long time without saying anything, then "oh alright, I'll trust you, if you believe that I'll find Clara then I'll believe too"
"I don't believe Doctor, I know"
"Ok I know then"
"Good" and I handed the box back to him, which he grabbed eagerly and stared at for a while before rushing down the steps to the area below the control room, I knelt down and watched through the glass floor as he carefully placed the box inside of one of the compartments, next to a large pile of his normal clothes. He returned to the upper level and I got up "now that I have done my job, convinced you not to give up, well until next year, I have to go and see if I can catch some last minute sleep, it's probably nearing morning by now"
"You know I could just take you back in time-"
"No Doctor, as I said last time, the time difference is too confusing, besides I've stayed up later than this to do homework before."
"If you're sure"
"Oh and before I go" I became very solemn and stepped forward "remember. Monks. Are not. Cool"
"Why do you keep saying that, they are cool, they are!"
"I keep saying it because I know that one day you will have to believe me"
"I doubt it"
"I know you do, that's what makes it funny" I sung as I left the Tardis.
"Bye Lympha"
"Bye Doctor"
He shut the door and the Tardis departed.
The Doctor visited once a year for the next six years after that, and every year, we hung out in the Tardis's infinite rooms and I reminded him not to give up on Clara and that monks are not cool, he eventually started to believe both. Other aliens tracked me down but I never needed to teleport.
He watched me grow up, through the pressure of GCSEs, and my hipster phase, the blue streaks I got in my hair and the giddiness of getting my A levels, my first job, discovering my love for biology and art and renting my first apartment. He was one of my closest friends despite how little I saw of him, because I knew him, and in those visits he got to know me as well.
I was 22 and sketching an illustration for a kid's book my friend Gwen had written when I got my first transmission from the Tardis since I was just a teenager. The Doctor had altered the technology three visits ago so I no longer had false memories of discussing or reading about the fake TV series, but we kept the computer programme that turned the transmissions into episodes because it amused me. I laughed out loud and jumped up and down as I first started receiving it, then quickly dropped my pencil, sat down and closed my eyes to watch.
There was a man speaking, but he wasn't the Doctor, so why was the Tardis showing me this? He was talking about the Wi-Fi, strange symbols, I opened my eyes, but the transmission was still playing in my head, it was disorientating but I opened my laptop and checked Wi-Fi providers, there it was, the strange symbols, I was about to click it before the man told me to stop, that it would kill me. I withdrew my hand and kept watching the message inside my head, why was she showing me this? Or was something other than the Tardis sending me the message? He was scared and I was scared for him, and there were others, all trapped just like him, I stood up, twisting the sonic thumb ring around and around, a nervous habit, but then that stupid, brilliant theme song played and I knew it was the Tardis sending me this, and if she knew about it, the Doctor would soon as well, and he would save them.
The Tardis showed me it was Cumbria, 1207, so that was where the monastery had been. I still couldn't see the Doctor but there was a monk, bashing on the doors and I thought he looked familiar, then I realised he was the young monk that I had startled with my yelling six years ago or I suppose technically around 800 years ago. He was talking to the abbot and then they were talking, talking about, him, I knew it was him before he even lifted his hood, The Doctor.
The Bells of Saint John? I didn't really care what they were, but he was moving, he was doing something, leaving behind yet another mopey painting, but his best one yet.
Then there she was, Clara Oswald, modern day, from the looks of it. My time, England, I felt tears sliding down my cheeks. Here she was again, and he would find her again.
I watched the whole thing unfold, he had moved the Tardis underground, a long way away from the orchards it had once sat in and she called him, she called the false phone on the Tardis, the Bells of Saint John, I snorted as I understood. He didn't know who she was and I screamed in frustration until he worked it out then she did it, clicked on them, the very Wi-Fi symbols that nearly killed me. He nearly lost her again that day but he did it, he saved the world and this time he saved her as well. They were together again; I watched each transmission carefully, eagerly, happily. I watched her bring the life back into him.
Two weeks later I was watching another transmission, but it was the last I'd ever watch. The Doctor had sent me a telepathic message just that morning that that he would be bringing Clara to visit today; we'd finally get to meet. In that very transmission, on the very day I was going to meet her she died. Threw herself into his time stream to save his life over and over and over again. And he followed, or at least tried. River stopped him; she couldn't help herself, only the smallest slither off of the very top of his index finger got touched and blown everywhere and everywhen by the time winds. But it was enough. The body of a time lord is a miracle, and his intent and that tiny bit of skin was enough to save her, to create a whole other him to guide her into the dregs of his life, a place where she could be safe, where he would protect her. But the real Doctor suffered, he realised she was safe but he had still lost her, River forced him into the Tardis and that's when the teleport I had activated an hour ago, the moment Jenny was first killed, sent me up.
He was standing very still, his back facing me. I stepped forward. "Doctor?" He turned and his face was red, puffy, wet with tears and the fire in his eyes roared. "She's gone, and I'll never see her again, not the real her, she's gone." I hugged him tightly and he sobbed and he wailed. Soon I was crying as well.
"Every time, Every time, and it's always my fault, all those people, all my friends- my family, they all leave, and I can never save them because I have to keep going- have to keep saving planets and universes at the cost of them- those brilliant, irreplaceable people, I can never stay with, never die with- It hurts, it hurts so bad Lympha."
His speech was wracked with sobs, behind him a small metal syringe rose from the Tardis control panel, at the same time something not dissimilar to a helmet but attached to several wires was lowered. I knew what I had to do. "Doctor I am so, so sorry".
I grabbed the syringe and jabbed it into his arm and his eyes closed as he slumped in my arms, his voice fading out "Lympha, what are you doing?"
"Saving you" I whispered back.
Don't worry! In case you wondered he's not dead. I said the story would get more interesting didn't I? A tad of a cliff hanger i admit but don't worry i am writing the next chapter probably as you are reading this and i think it's going well, fingers crossed! As always thanks for the support, and generally thank you for actually reading this whole chapter and then reading me babble on down here.
Reviews are what makes me smile when i check my emails.
~Talie