Enough (Revised)
A Sailor Moon fic by Gigi
Disclaimer: Nothing's mine.
Chapter 4: Reflections of Fire
A/N: I'm so glad you guys are enjoying the revisions! I am, too. Anyway, we're getting into varied points of view now (exciting, no?), not just Usagi's and Mamoru's. Now we're getting into subplots (I now have subplots. How cool is that?), and as you can probably tell, I'm rather excited about it. I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it!
The omnipresent chatter of the cafeteria atrium provided enough noise to cover up the fact that one of the generally loudest tables at lunch was unusually quiet. Ami, Rei and Makoto all picked absently at their lunches, too preoccupied with coming to terms with the enormous—and seemingly overnight—change in their leader and best friend. The girls watched as Usagi breezed by the table with a friendly smile and a wave before going to sit with Naru, her childhood best friend, from whom she'd had to distance herself upon becoming Sailor Moon. Watching her giggle and gossip with Naru sent the girls' thoughts reeling. Usagi was acting as if nothing was wrong so as not to draw too much attention to the fact that she wasn't sitting with her usual group of friends.
Ami was thrilled at how smart Usagi proved to be in class when she actually cared enough to pay attention, but the fact that the newfound intelligence may have cost her the friendship she cherished the most kept the bluenette subdued. She wracked her brain for a possible way to fix things with the bubbly blonde. She came up with nothing. She could have apologized for not having faith in her as a leader and as a senshi, but it all sounded so trite. Words alone wouldn't accomplish anything. She was going to have to earn back Usagi's trust, which, though easily given, was not so easily regained.
Makoto stared at her gourmet box lunch, saddened by the fact that, for the first time since Usagi befriended her seven months ago, she would have to throw away her extra food. Her mind revisited the confrontation from the night before. She couldn't deny the pride she felt bubble in her chest when she saw Sailor Moon finally stand up for herself, albeit against her best friends. Relief followed when Sailor Moon told them she patrolled every single night alone so that they could get adequate rest and Tokyo would remain safe. She'd always worried about Usagi's commitment to the senshi, but she was beginning to see her fears were unfounded. Usagi's dedication made Makoto's seem downright lazy. She shifted in her seat at that though. "Lazy" and "Makoto" in the same sentence just didn't sit well with the brunette.
It bothered Rei that she was actually nervous for training that night. She shouldn't have called that meeting. Then they would have been at the battle in time, and Sailor Moon wouldn't have blown up at them. And Usagi wouldn't have changed. Her chopsticks froze in her food as she realized she resented Usagi for taking away any quality Rei could have criticized. When had she, once the freak priestess nobody wanted to talk to, begun thinking herself so above the girl who'd actually given her the chance to have a relatively normal social life? This revelation, unfortunately, did not rid her of the resentment she held towards Usagi, she noted with disgust at herself. Every time she was near the girl, she couldn't help but put her down enough to at least make Rei seem like the better senshi, especially since of course Usagi got to be the most powerful of them.
That day at lunch, the unusually quiet table did not seat four exceptionally close friends, but instead, three guilty outcasts. They needed to fix this. Fast.
xoxoxo
The waning gibbous moon shone brightly down on the raven-haired priestess pacing back and forth in front of the gates to Juuban Kids' Park. The gates used to be simply decorative up until less than a year ago, when Juuban's main park became a Negaverse hotspot. Now the Kids' Park—smaller than the main park, which was too vast to accommodate fencing—closed its gates at night to minimize innocents getting harmed by rampant youma in the park. Which was probably the very reason Usagi picked this park instead of the main one to use as their training grounds.
Rei checked her watch anxiously. Eleven thirty. The sound of a branch rustling caught her ear, and she looked up to find Sailor Moon poised at the very edge of a thin branch that hung directly over the spires of the gates. "I'm glad to see you're on time," Sailor Moon said, a pleased smile on her face. Of course, Rei didn't see the smile for the happy realization that the girls were listening to her that it was; rather she took it as a patronizing taunt to show off her authority. All thoughts of treating her best friend like an actual best friend flew out the window.
"Yeah, it's a real surprise for me to be punctual," Rei snapped dryly.
Sailor Moon brushed off the sarcastic statement, though she was no longer smiling. "Task number one. Make it over the gate without touching me. I will not move from this branch."
Once Sailor Moon started speaking, Rei shifted into her "focus mode." Focus only on the task at hand and push everything else—including resentment—to the back of your mind. It was what made her so successful at reading the Great Fire.
"You may not henshin."
And just like that, Rei's focus evaporated. "What? Why not?"
"Because you need to be ready to get out of sticky situations as Rei Hino, not just as Sailor Mars," Sailor Moon explained patiently before making a gesture with her hand and retrieving a red, pen-sized wand from her subspace pocked. "Besides, you can't henshin anyway."
Rei goggled at the sight of her henshin wand in Sailor Moon's gloved hand. She hadn't even felt her take it!
Sailor Moon smirked. "We'll work on stealth later on. But come on now. I'd like to only be here for an hour or two."
Falling back into her focus mode, Rei back up to get a running start, leaping off her left foot and jumping off the wall and the tree alternately, until she landed on the branch right next to Sailor Moon. The thin branch wobbled under her added weight, making Rei struggle to keep her balance. Sailor Moon was steady as a rock, gazing at her expectantly. Before she gave herself a chance to fall onto the sharp spires of the gate, Rei jumped off the branch and rolled into a landing inside the park. As she regained her footing, she panted, "How was that?"
Sailor Moon stepped off the branch and landed lightly next to Rei. "A good first effort," she declared, handing Rei her wand. "You'll get quicker with practice. We'll begin every training session with that." Speechless, Rei accepted the wand. "Well, are you going to henshin?"
Without another word (as if she could even think of anything to say), Rei thrust her wand into the air. "Mars Star Power Make Up!" she yelled before she was engulfed in red light.
As soon as the fireworks ended, Sailor Moon switched back into her trainer persona. "Alright, run a mile around the track over there to warm up." She conjured up a stopwatch. "You'll be timed, so don't lag."
xoxoxo
Over the course of the next hour, Moon had Mars go through karate forms, jump through the canopy of the woods with Moon chasing her ("You want me to leap from branch to branch in heels and somehow avoid breaking my ankle?"), and practice her aim by using her Burning Mandala on a detached tree branch, followed by extinguishing each fire before the wind spread it. While she made it through the karate forms with almost laughable ease, she fell out of the branches five times, sustaining an impressive array of cuts and bruises and one sprained ankle, and performing and controlling her attacks so many times drained her faster than if a youma had gotten a hold of her.
Sailor Moon approached Mars as the Senshi of Fire bent over and tried to catch her breath, exhausted and aching all over. The throbbing in her ankle was no help either. "You've done very well today, Mars. I'm proud of you for all the effort you've put in tonight."
"Does that mean we're done for the night?" Mars asked hopefully.
"Not quite," the blonde superheroine replied. "I just have one more thing to show you, and then I'll take you home. Do you think you can manage one last Burning Mandala?" Mars nodded tiredly. "Good. I want you attack me."
The words sent Mars sputtering as she watched her leader walk twenty paces away and turn around. "You want me to attack you? Are you out of your mind?" Although a small part of her, she was ashamed to realize, was actually happy with the request. Moon smiled peacefully and gestured for her to begin. Shaking her head, Mars straightened and gathered up all her remaining energy, warmth pooling in her hands. "Burning Mandala!"
As the six rings of fire sped through the air towards Sailor Moon, she showed no sign of fear. In fact, she was perfectly still until she raised her hand to her head and…swirled it. Mars had no chance to ponder what it was she had done because her own attack had double back, and she hurriedly let the power dissipate before it hit her. "How did you do that?" she gasped.
Moon flashed another smile and crossed the clearing. "I will start teaching you that on Thursday," she announced, picking up her senshi. "Now let's get you home before you make that ankle any worse."
xoxoxo
Sailor Moon gently deposited Rei in her bed at the shrine. Her demeanor the entire trip to Cherry Hill in no way suggested she was still angry at her senshi for almost committing a mutiny against her. No, she had treated Rei like a good friend who needed her. But then, Usagi always did have a very forgiving heart.
"Sleep off the ankle," Sailor Moon said. "It should be just fine by Thursday."
"What if we have a battle before then?" Rei asked, anxious at the thought of being out of commission with a youma on the loose. Sailor Moon placed Rei's henshin wand on her bedside table. "Then you are not permitted, under any circumstances, to fight if your ankle isn't completely healed. I'll check it every morning and afternoon to make sure you aren't lying just so you can go into battle and make it worse."
Guilt pooled in the bottom of the priestess' stomach. Sailor Moon was only saying this to keep her safe and to prevent further injury. It was a decent, wise decision. And yet all Rei could focus on was the anger flickering inside her at the fact that she'd been forgiven so easily. She wanted a reason to put down her leader, even if it was simply that she held a grudge.
"Why are you being so nice to me?" Rei all but demanded. A new thought had mollified the angry monster inside her: if she had really forgiven Rei so quickly, Sailor Moon was a fool for forgetting such a betrayal so soon.
Sailor Moon's answer was simple, but it was enough to replace all of Rei's guilt with worry. "Because, even though I don't trust you anymore, you are still one of my senshi. It's my duty to take care of you." She opened the partition and turned around, her frame outlined by moonlight. "Sleep well, Rei." And she left.
Whatever she did that night, Rei definitely did not sleep well. Suddenly all of Sailor Moon's proud expressions from throughout the training took on a new meaning. She was testing the senshi, to see if they took to her direction well enough to ensure she could trust them to do so in battle. Testing their very birthrights to being senshi. Sailor Moon had been proud of her work that night because, for once, Mars hadn't questioned or challenged her orders, aside from the first task of jumping over the gate. She'd been proud of Mars for channeling her frustration at Moon and at herself into her drills. She'd been happy to see Mars' determination to be a better senshi overpowered her desire to give into her snappish tendencies. She'd genuinely wanted to see Mars pass the test and was over the moon that she had.
She'd never realized just how different she was from Sailor Moon until right then. Rei let her ego rule her actions and put others, most of all Usagi, down to raise her own self-image. Usagi simply had no ego. She cared more for the people that surrounded her than she did for herself. Rei rarely forgave someone—to the point where she would forget the reason behind her anger. Usagi was quick to forgive, but, as Rei was beginning to see, not as quick to forget.
Usagi had known she had to see if her senshi even deserved her trust before restoring all the faith she'd had in them before they'd planned a mutiny. Rei would have just confiscated the senshi's henshin rods and been on her way.
Violet eyes glimmered in the darkness as they widened with realization. All this resentment she harbored towards her best friend for being everything she wasn't, it hadn't always been like this. In fact, what used to simply be admiration and friendly teasing gradually turned into conscious searching for flaws. This anger wasn't hers. It didn't feel natural. What was behind it, then?
Rei swung her legs off her bed, fully intending to consult the Great Fire about whatever currently resided within her, only to crumple to the ground with a pained cry. Her ankle had buckled under her weight.
She'd seek the Fire's guidance once she could walk again.
xoxoxo
The Tokyo skyline glittered beautifully under the clear night sky. Sailor Moon stood behind the railing of the water tower near the Cherry Hill Shrine, where she'd just left Rei, deciding which section of the city she should patrol that night. Retrieving a strip of bandage from her subspace pocket, she slowly wrapped the burn on her right palm from handing Mars' Burning Mandala.
"What did you do to your hand?" Sailor Moon turned her head to the right just as Tuxedo Kamen alighted on the railing.
Although there was no denying the way her heartbeat picked up at his presence, Sailor Moon's response was cool and her smile wry. "These gloves aren't exactly fireproof." Tuxedo cocked his head to the side in curiosity at her cryptic answer. "This is the second time you've come when there is no battle."
The caped hero lowered himself to a squat, steady on the railing with no worry whatsoever concerning the fifteen-story drop. "I wanted to check on you," he said honestly, a flash of midnight blue momentarily showing through his opaque white mask. "You were different last night."
Unable to think of a suitably aloof reply, Sailor Moon returned her gaze to the city. "I think I'll check on the Azabu district tonight," she declared, jumping onto the railing.
"Mind if I join you?" Tuxedo Kamen asked, straightening.
Sailor Moon shrugged. "It's up to you. Don't expect to find anything though." With those words, she jumped down to the nearest rooftop and proceeded toward Azabu, feeling more than hearing the whisper of Tuxedo Kamen's footfalls behind her.
After a few minutes of silence and going from rooftop to rooftop, Tuxedo Kamen spoke. "So how did training go?"
Sailor Moon stopped short at the question, just one step from the edge of a building. "How did you—?"
"I overheard you after the battle," he admitted sheepishly. "You seemed so upset that I hadn't wanted to leave you alone."
Panicking, Sailor Moon tried to recall her exact words from the night before to make sure she hadn't given any hint as to their identities in her anger. "You spied on us?" she sputtered in disbelief. She'd known this man for nine months and had trusted him unconditionally. After all, he saved her life on a regular basis. But…did the girls maybe have the right idea about Tuxedo Kamen's allegiance?
Seeing the wheels turning in the blonde's head, Tuxedo Kamen rushed to allay her anxiety. "Only because I was worried about you, I promise," he insisted. "I would never violate your privacy like that otherwise. I just wanted to make sure you were okay because of our discussion before the battle."
Doubt still shone in her eyes just as it laced her words. "How did you know to come to me before the battle?" Had he watched her often? Enough to know her civilian identity?
Reluctant to disclose the dream and his princess, Tuxedo Kamen chose his words carefully. "I told you that I can feel you henshin," he began. Sailor Moon nodded slowly. "You usually henshin once a night, unless there's a battle. When you henshined for a second time, something was…off." He didn't really know how to describe his apparently one-way bond with Sailor Moon without spooking her.
"How could you tell?" Sailor Moon pressed.
"I usually get a blinding headache when you're in trouble, and that's how I know to come to battle," he explained. "I didn't get that last night, but there was still this voice inside me that said you needed me." And that voice literally pushed me out of my dream so I would wake up, he added grumpily in his mind.
"You can find me so easily," she observed uneasily.
"Only when you're henshined," Tuxedo Kamen reassured her.
Slowly, the apprehension faded from her eyes. "Okay," she said simply, leaping onto the next roof. When he'd joined her, she tried to steer back to the original question. "Mars' training went well."
Relief coursed through Tuxedo Kamen. She still trusted him, despite her senshi's reservations about his motives. "Really?"
"She truly wishes to be a better senshi, and that took precedence over her usual attitude," she commented. "In fact, she acted much more like herself than I've seen her act for a few months now."
"And this is only after the first training session?" Tuxedo Kamen added, the excitement evident in his voice.
Sailor Moon smiled at the statement. "I think showing her what I can teach her now that I've got energy again helped bring her back."
"So you didn't dream after going back to sleep last night?" he asked, hoping she'd actually managed to get some rest, as they landed on another rooftop.
His hopes revealed no fruit. "I didn't go back to sleep last night," she confessed. A serene expression flitted across her face when she looked up at the glowing orb in the dark sky. "But the moonlight is kind to me."
They jumped another rooftop. They were almost to the Starlight Tower. "How do you mean?"
Sailor Moon kept her gaze scanning the streets as she answered him. "I'm not sure I quite understand it myself, but last night, before the battle, the moonlight changed for me. Now, the moonlight gives me energy in lieu of sleep."
"So you just aren't going to sleep now?" To say that didn't worry Tuxedo Kamen would be as big a lie as saying he didn't envy her newfound ability.
She shook her head. "I'm sure this energy is linked to the moon phases. Last night, the energy I received seemed more potent because it was the full moon. I think the only time id be able to completely forgo sleep would be on nights with the full moon."
"And on the new moon?"
A sigh escaped her lips before they curved up into a resigned smile. "Then I'll need a lot of coffee the next morning. Have your dreams stopped?"
"No," Tuxedo Kamen said. "But I've had them off and on since I was six. Now they're every night. I don't see why they would stop anytime soon."
He heard her gasp in sympathy. "I would have gone insane if I'd had these dreams since I was six," she declared.
"Well, they're not nightmares every night. Those are more of a weekly occurrence, but the dream I have every night isn't exactly pleasant or restful, either," he admitted. "I don't think I could have handled the kind of nightmares you're having since six years old." He reached for Sailor Moon before she could hop onto the next rooftop. He turned her toward him and held her gaze intently through his mask. "If your nightmares ever scare you like they did last night, you can always call me to meet you."
"How can I call you?" His insistence lit something warm and comforting in her chest. Knowing she could receive some sort of solace from her nightly terrors by someone who genuinely understood her distress was enough for her to immediately accept his offer.
Tuxedo Kamen's voice grew soft. "If you henshin, and you need me, I'll know to come find you."
Gratitude sparkled in her cerulean eyes, and before he'd registered any movement, Sailor Moon had burrowed herself into his chest in a hug that radiated throughout his entire being. "Thank you, Tuxedo Kamen," she murmured into his tux. She felt warm arms encircle her and return the embrace without hesitation. The scent of roses and coffee made her feel so cozy and…content. As if just being near this man would be enough to keep the dreams at bay. "I just hope you can talk to me about your nightmares, too."
Tuxedo Kamen squeezed her a little closer to his chest. "I hope so, too."
A/N: I hope you enjoyed this latest installment! Next time: Rei receives the shock of her life during a vision, an imposter Sailor Moon has appeared on the scene, and when Rei doesn't show up at school, the senshi find her passed out at the Temple. Please review!