The Trial

Hikari M666, formerly Dani Wheeler-Kaiba

Once again, cheers for the reviews! You keep me happy in this world where minors can't drink in public.

Disclaimer. You should know what a disclaimer is by now, so I'm not going to bore you by writing one. Just the word 'disclaimer' should be enough.

I check over my Shadow Realm list before the next witness is called. Hopefully this one won't piss me off. There has to be one person here who isn't against me, right?

Right?

I want Ryou. He'd be nice to me.

"Hurry up with the next witness!" the judge barks.

Greasy guy shuffles around with his papers, frowning, for a moment. When he finally looks up from them, he looks slightly relieved.

"Well?" The judge raises an eyebrow.

"Your Honour, the prosecution has no further witnesses."

I shoot up in my seat and glance over at him. He looks pretty happy. Funny, he hasn't been accused of paedophilia lately. You'd think I have more right to be happy. And I am. EXTREMELY happy! I WANT THIS COURT TO DIE!

"No more witnesses?" the judge repeats. My Bakura-sense is tingling…I am sensing that my torture by trial will end in three – two – one –

"Wait!" Greasy guy says suddenly.

Wait?

No!

No wait!

The judge narrows her eyes at Greasy guy. "Wait? Are there any more witnesses for the prosecution or aren't there?"

All the relief is gone from the lawyer's face, replaced by – actually, what is it replaced by? His expression's gone kind of blank. I didn't know it was humanly possible to have such a clueless expression.

He slowly nods; ouch, that looked forced. He must really want this thing over and done with as much as I do. What's the matter, Greasy guy, was I not what you expected?

The judge groans. Okay, now I'm offended. They all want to be rid of me so soon? Pfft. They all secretly want me, I can tell.

"Fine," she snaps. "Get whoever it is up here, then."

Greasy guy nods again – and again it looks really forced. Come on, even I think he's being stupid now. Sure, this trial sucks and I might be going to jail, but it's nothing to blow a blood vessel over. Greasy guy opens his mouth to speak.

"I call to the stand – " Woah, and what's with his voice? It's gone all – expressionless. Like his face! What the hell? Is the next witness so bad that all the emotion has been sucked out of him? They can't be that bad.

"Marik Ishtar."

…I stand corrected.

Marik's come to save me from the stupidity of everybody in here! IT'S ABOUT TIME! Now where is he?

Ah, here he comes. Excellent. Even if he doesn't completely throw this place into chaos, he'll at least put in a good word for me.

He takes a seat up the front of the room, and winks at me. He is a man with a plan. I look over at Greasy guy again, to see him blinking profusely and holding a hand up to his forehead. He's not expressionless any more, which I suppose is a good thing…maybe he was suffering temporary insanity?

He stares at Marik as though he has no idea who he is. But he tries to keep things going smoothly anyway. "Oh – we have another witness after all, then. Er…would you please state your name, Sir?"

I frown. Why does Marik need to say his name, when Greasy guy just said it himself?

Marik's looking normal. By normal of course I mean he's looking evil, sadistic and up to something.

"Marik Ishtar," he says, in a suspiciously polite voice. If there was any doubt in my mind before, there isn't now; he's got something evil planned.

Greasy guy frowns and shuffles through his papers. "I don't have any record of a Marik Ishtar here…you're not on the witness list."

No record? Sounds like he's not meant to be here. Which means he came here especially to cause trouble. Sweet.

But hold on; didn't Greasy guy just call Marik up to the stand? If he wasn't meant to be here…then how…how did Greasy guy know his…it doesn't make sense!

Other people seem to have realised this as well. The jury people are giving Grease man strange looks, as if they think he's mad.

"Well – er – " He's aware of the looks he's getting. "I – I suppose you can still take the stand."

"Excellent," Marik says briskly. "Ask away." He's way too happy about this.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see someone move. But when I turn to actually look, they're gone. Normally I'd say it was nothing, but when Marik's in the room, you never know.

"All – all right then," Greasy guy says weakly. "Mister Ishtar, how do you know the defendant?"

Marik smirks. "Oh, we're good friends." The way he says friends makes me raise my eyebrows. He makes it sound as though by 'good friends' he means, 'screwing each other'. To set the record completely straight, we most definitely are not. I'm with Ryou, and it's staying that way. And I suspect that Marik and Malik secretly jump each other every night, but as of yet I have no proof of that.

But hey, Marik's got a plan here. So I'll go along with it.

Greasy guy seems to have picked up on the hint. I can actually see a bead of sweat roll down his forehead. "Yes," he mutters. "Friends." The sad thing is he actually sounds like he's trying to convince himself. "And – have you ever witnessed anything that would imply that the defendant engages in criminal activity?"

Marik snickers. "I always tell him that some of the things we get up to should be considered criminal."

My Bakura-sense is tingling again. And this time it's asking me what the hell Marik is up to, because I've got no idea where this is heading. Unless his aim is to make Greasy guy sick, because in that respect, he seems to be succeeding.

"In – indeed." Greasy guy swallows. He's gone a bit…pale, to say the least. "Well, I don't really think we need to go into details of that point – "

"Oh, it's no trouble," Marik smirks. "Let's see…oh, Bakura's a big fan of torture. And not the regular boring torture either. See, I'm partial towards whips and handcuffs, but Bakura's the type of guy who can take any object, and turn it into a – "

"OKAY!" Greasy guy shouts, horrified. "Please! Mister Ishtar – we really don't need to go into details!"

"No, it's really quite interesting!" Marik insists. "You wouldn't believe some of the things he can do. You'd never look at a pen the same way again."

Greasy guy, who is holding a pen, drops it. I have to bite my tongue to stop myself laughing – almost everybody in the room is looking green!

But Marik isn't done yet. "Or a tree, come to think of it."

You can almost see the mental images Greasy guy is getting.

"Actually, hair brushes too."

I look over at the jury just in time to see an elderly lady losing her breakfast in her handbag.

"And don't even think about eggs again."

…Did he find out about that or is he just a good guesser?

Greasy guy sways on the spot. "Dear god," he murmurs, before falling flat on the floor.

You've got to be kidding; the weakling fainted! Everyone seems glad of a distraction from Marik, so they all jump up and crowd around Greasy guy, who doesn't look at though he'll be waking up any time soon.

I glance at my Shadow Realm list. Shrugging, I cross Greasy guy out. Shadow Realm, fainted, same thing.

The man-woman judge is the first to recover. "Damnit!" she snaps. "First the other judge, now him! What is wrong with this trial?"

Marik is waiting patiently at the stand. He doesn't look worried in the least. Is this all part of his plan?

One of the people near Greasy guy says, "He's not waking up, Your Honour. What do we do?"

The judge groans. "Bloody hell! Get him out of here then, he's useless. We'll need to go get another lawyer to fill in for him. This case will never end…"

"Your Honour," Marik says suddenly. He's using that suspiciously polite voice again.

"What?" The judge turns to him.

"Well, as you say, you need another lawyer. It wouldn't be fair to drag one away from their important work, would it?" he says innocently. "And as luck would have it, I have a bit of experience in law myself…if it would be at all convenient, I could take his place."

WHAT?

"WHAT?" the judge yells. Thought-stealer. "I AM NOT GOING TO ALLOW THE LAWYER FOR THE PROSECUTION TO BE A SICK-MINDED, PERVERTED FRIEND OF THE DEFENDANT'S!"

Marik sighs. "Come on," he insists. He's pretty calm for someone being shouted at.

The judge opens her mouth to scream at him again, when she freezes. Completely freezes. Then her face goes blank – exactly the same way Greasy guy's did before! What is going on here? Is Marik behind it?

I look at Marik, and see his eyes flicker to the back of the room. I follow his gaze.

Who should be standing up the back, holding the Millennium Rod, but Malik?

Ah; it all makes sense now! Malik was controlling Greasy guy when he called Marik to the stand, I saw Malik out of the corner of my eye, and now he's controlling the judge! So he and Marik are in this together…but why?

The judge speaks, in what I now know is a mind-controlled voice. "All right, you can be the new lawyer for the prosecution."

You have GOT to be kidding me. This is what Marik came here for? TO GO AGAINST ME IN COURT?

Marik grins. "Excellent." He stands up and walks over to where Greasy guy once sat.

As he walks past me, I growl, "Traitor."

Marik just shrugs. "It looked like fun." He takes a seat. "Don't worry everyone, we've got plenty more witnesses for the prosecution," he announces.

PEOPLE TO HUNT DOWN AND SEND TO THE SHADOW REALM

11. Marik – I'll show HIM fun.

Apologies for taking…er…five months with this chapter. I – lacked inspiration?