A/N: Hello. If you want to read this chapter, press number 1. If you don't want to read this new chapter, press number 2. If you pressed number 2, get the hell outta here before I make you.

Anywaaaay! I know that it took me forever to post this, but Burning Forests was still keeping me busy with her super longish PMs (really, I think that you sent me the longest PM I ever got). So if you feel like yelling at someone, go ahead, she can take it. And my awesomesauce beta OneDream 2Dream was a little bit busy. But I'm here with a new chap, stop complaining.

Disclaimer: I own amazing cupcake table and sandwich bench as Carly. Now I have to think up of a plan how to get iCarly.

Should I be freaked out? I'm with Gibby in Glitter Gloss right now. Why did I agree to do this anyway? Don't get me wrong, lipglosses are awesome, tasty, sparkly, tasty, nice and... did I mention tasty? Okay, I'm getting off-topic. I can't believe we're doing this. What are we doing? Stalking Tasha. Do you get it? No? I don't either. Gibby broke up with her five months ago and now he's decided he wants her back. He said he's sick of the annoying girls flirting with him, winking at him, and asking him out. What the duck? What do they see in him? He's just a Gibby! All those hot girls should be drooling over boys like Griffin (ew, but it's true) or even Freddie, not a Gibby. I mean, maybe Freddie isn't the coolest boy alive, but if you didn't notice, he's hot. I'm not trying to imply anything, but Freddie has some body and handsome face. We guys notice those things, too. You can't deny that, can you? Right, you can't. Do you think that only girls can say, 'Oh yeah, that chick is hot!' without everyone questioning their sexuality? I'm perfectly straight, if you wanna know.
I notice some pretty girl looking at Gibby lovingly and bitting her lower lip. Her pretty chocolate brown eyes are supplemented with long dark eyelashes. Her curly, caramel brown hair reminds me of Sam's a little. She wears a pinkish shiny lipgloss. I don't wanna sound like a pedophile, but she's insanely gorgeous. And she's staring at Gibby. Oh, Jesus Christ, how did he ingratiate himself with you?
I walk toward her and speak slowly, "Do you like this kid with sunglasses?" I point at Gibby, who's standing a few feet in front of us. She looks at me with a confused face.
"Um, yeah." She lowers her head. I nod.
"WHY?" She jerks and puts a hand on her chest.
"Dude, you scared me!"
"He's taken."
"What?"

"He's taken. Don't bother to try to ask him out." I raised an eyebrow and half-smiled. "I know about another boy who would love to go out with you, though." The moment I stopped talking, the girl slapped me hard. Was that necessary?
"You pervert!" She turned around and walked away. What just happened? I wanted to give her phone number to Freddie! The poor guy will never get a girlfriend! In past two months, he went on a million dates, however, it always mysteriously ended up badly. I wonder why...
Gibby snaps me out of my thoughts. "Man! We're supposed to follow Tasha!" I check him out once again. I mean, check him out, not 'check him out'. I just wanna check out what is he wearing! Jeez, could you just stop accusing me of being weird? He's wearing a long coat, a hat in the same color and Wayfarer sunglasses. He said he must be in- incon- inconspu- inconspicu- aaaah! I can't even say it! He said he has to be discreet (that works too). His spy disguise doesn't seem really discreet to me.
"Gibby? Why are we doing that? Can't you call Carly? She knows how to do that stuff," I whine. I'm really tired. I wish I could just lie down and die right here. My head hurts like he- I meant shell. Yeah, shell.
"Alright, you're a lousy assistaint anyway." Oh wow, thanks Gibster, you always know how to make me feel better. I call Carly to get her nice-shaped Shay butt (Shay's butts are not flat!) here and help Gibby. She doesn't complain, something about Sam and Freddie being insupportable,
and I have to walk home (Gibby insisted on going on foot). After few minutes, hours, maybe days, I finally manage to get to Bushwell. Let's skip the part where I find out that the elevator is broken and I have to take the stairs, trip and cause myself some injuries. I open the door slowly, aware of the fact that Sam and Freddie will probably be there.
"Holy macarena! WhyAreYouTwoHolding- oh well, just tell me what happened," I say unenthustically. The two of them quickly stop holding hands. "Why are you all fancy?" I ask curiously. They were wearing 'dinner clothes' and I don't have idea why.
Sam's hair is combed up in a bun and she wears a little more make-up than usual. Her petite body is covered (or should I say UNcovered) in a thigh-lenght blue dress. And holy chiz, she has absolutely gorgeous shoes! Those silver high-heels are a must-have! When you're a girl, of course.
Freddie doesn't seem so bad either. His hair is spiked as usual, but he wears a simple white shirt with a black tie, black jeans and red converse shoes.
Give me a moment. Holding hands, fancy clothes... THEY WERE ABOUT TO GO TO A DATE!
"You're dating!" I point an accusing finger at them. "You're dating and you didn't tell me anything! Why? I'm like your older brother, I deserve to know!"
"Spencer," Sam rolls her eyes. "We-"
"I don't get why you don't believe me," I interrupt her. "Does Carly know about this?"
"Spencer-" Freddie tries to say something, but I don't let him.
"Oh my gosh! She doesn't know about it! Did you think I would tell her and your little secret would be over? I can't-"
"SPENCER!" Sam and Freddie shout at me simultaneously.
"We're not dating," Sam speaks slowly. They're not- How then- Why-
"Well? I'm waiting for an explanation!" Sam and Freddie both roll their eyes once again. Freddie looks at Sam with a smile and she returns a smirk. She bits her lower lip and stares at him for a second. Am I missing something? "Hey? Guys? You know, I'm still waiting!"
"Spencer, you won't believe us. We're conflicted if we should tell you." Sam glares at me and I'm scared. "Do we tell him, Benson?" Freddie nods slowly with the most serious expression I have ever seen. "Spence, I don't know how you will react, try not to be scared, though, okay? The thing is," she pauses dramatically, "we're vampires." Oh, that explains it all. WHAT?
"Let's say that it's true. But how does it explain why were you holding hands?" I shake my head.
"Okay. You have to tell him everything, Sam," Freddie lowers his head. Sam gasps and gives him a frightened look.
"Everything?" she whispers.
"We gotta do what we gotta do."
"We would have to turn him into vampire as well!" No no no no no no no no. I'm not turning into a vampire. They can suck each other's necks how they want, but I'm not getting involved. No. They're still debating whether they should tell me or not, so I take the opportunity and tip-toe to my bedroom quickly. I like my life, thank you. As I shut my door, I still hear muffled voices. I can't hear what they're saying, though. And I'm happy for that. I guess I'm just gonna take a nap. That was my plan until I heard laughter. Yeah, laughter! Or was it in my head? Never mind, I'm taking nap anyway.

Three hours ago:

Sam and Freddie both texted Carly about being in her apartment in five minutes. There had to be something wrong with them, they never announced their arrivals. They just came, ate the Shay's food, occupied their couch and left. Carly noticed that they weren't acting like themselves for a few weeks, but everytime she asked them what was wrong, they waved her off with a smile and not-so-reassurring, 'Everything's okay, Carls.'
They were also spending a lot of time together. Not spend-spend time together, they were just hanging out in her apartment while she was gone. Isn't that enough? They knew she wouldn't be home, but came anyway and spent their free time together voluntarily. Spencer was trying to persuade Carly that Sam and Freddie were acting weird since they saw some monsters, aliens and God knows what else. Maybe she started to question Spencer's mental health, however, it didn't explicate Sam and Freddie's strange behaviour.
"You have to help me!" the two teens yelled simultaneously as they made their way to the kitchen. They were pushing each other, it almost seemed like a competition: 'Who will talk to Carly first'. "Carly!"
"What!" she yelled at the same tone with a grin on her face. Her friends were always annoying the chiz outta her, but that's why she loved them, after all.
"I'm talking to her first!" Sam stated.
"No! This is really important!"

"My issue is way importanter!"
"Importanter is not even a word!"
Carly stopped being amused immediately. Her friends' fights were the less funny part of their friendship. She was thinking about using the spray bottle again; it worked before and it could work now. When she was about to get up and go to her bedroom to find it, Sam and Freddie suddenly stopped fighting.
"So, will you tell me what you need, guys?" she asked as nicely as she could. Maybe she was a sweet person, but she couldn't be sweet all the time. It was usually coming naturally, however, when Sam and Freddie fought, she lost her nerves.
"Ladies first," Sam smirked at Freddie.
"So?" Freddie rolled his eyes and waited for Sam to begin.
"I meant you, idiot." Sam was so complicated. First she wanted to talk, then she ditched her opportunity just to insult him. Freddie was about to start a new fight, but he had more serious problems than that.
"Dinner with my father, his new 'girlfriend' and her two daughters. Tonight," Freddie reeled off.
"No way!" Sam's eyes widened. "Me too!"
"That means-"
"Oh yeah."
"It can be a coincidence."
"Don't be stupid!"
"Sam..."
"We're in deep, deep chiz."
"Don't say that."
"We're gonna be step-"
"NO!"
"Fredward, you know it's true."
"It can't be!"
Carly was trying to process what was going on. She was moving her head back and forth between Sam and Freddie trying to catch up on their conversation. If she was confused before, she didn't know how to call what she was feeling now.
"Shut up!" she suddenly yelled at her friends. "Can you explain what in the world is so horrible about going on a dinner with your parents and their fiancées?" She was hyperventilating. She could take a lot, but that was too much. Sam and Freddie weren't responding, they just gaped at her with scared looks on their faces.
"You see," Freddie began slowly. "We think that, maybe, it's just a possibility and it's not very likely. It could be someone else-"
"Our parents are dating," Sam clenched her fists and rolled her eyes. Carly felt like fainting. Her friends couldn't be step-siblings. That would ruin their friendship! They would move in together with their parents and wouldn't need her anymore. Who would eat all the ham in the Shay's fridge? Who would occupy their couch? Who would wake her up at 4 a.m. because they were scared of thunderstorm? They were spending more time together lately, imagine what would happen if they were living together! They wouldn't need the Shay's apartment anymore. Maybe it was selfish, but Carly didn't want to lose her friends. They were getting along almost 'well' and it scared her. She was terrified. She knew it would happen one day, but she thought that they would 'get along very well' together. Was it dream? If it was, she wanted to wake up.
"We don't know if it's true, Carly," Freddie reassured her as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "It could be just a misunderstanding." Carly was confused more than before. A misunderstanding? She wanted to ask if they could explain everything, but she wasn't able to form words. Sam took the sign.
"My mom started to date that nerdy guy with brownish hair and eyes. And well, his 'handsome son with dark hair'," she grimaced as she said that, "lives in Bushwell Plaza. Freddie's father is dating some blonde woman with a long criminal record and two daughters. So, we think that there's a possibility that... you know." Carly was perplexed. A possibility? It was obvious! She was sure that their parents are dating, one hundred percent sure. Instead of yelling, crying or whatever was expected from her, she smiled weakly.
"Do you want to help get all prettied up?" She wanted to enjoy her friends being just 'frenemies' while it lasted. Maybe it was the last time she would see Sam beating up Freddie. Not that she enjoyed it, but it was sort of a tradition. She was sure Sam wouldn't try to kill Freddie if he was her brother. She wanted to break Melanie's bones multiple times, but she never did because 'she was her sister, after all'.
Freddie and Sam stared at Carly in confusion, not sure why she was so happy. Maybe she wanted them to be step-siblings? Maybe she thought that they would go along better? It was all so damn confusing.
"Okay?" Sam smiled. Carly picked out Freddie's clothes (she knew his closet by heart) and sent him to get ready. She led Sam upstairs and made her wear the prettiest dress she found in her closet, and she did her make-up and hair. Sam didn't complain, but she was still wondering what made Carly so hyper. She couldn't possibly like the idea of Fredward and Sam being siblings, could she?
"Done!" Carly smiled widely. Sam looked at herself in the mirror and mentally slapped herself for not paying attention when Carly did 'those things' to her. She looked like a doll. No, more like Taylor Swift in her stupid music videos. It was just a dinner, she wasn't going to a fashion festival. "You like it?" Carly asked hopefully. Sam couldn't dissapoint her.
"Of course. It's awesome. Thanks, Carls."

Freddie was already waiting in the living room when his two friends descended the stairs. Carly would swear she saw him staring at Sam with a smile and Sam nervously bitting her lip, but she wouldn't put her finger on it. Maybe she was just already imagining them being closer. She was about to break the silence, but her phone did it for her. Spencer, of course. He told her to go to Glitter Gloss to help Gibby with something. She wasn't really thrilled, but went anyway. Never mess with a tired Shay.
"Guys? I'm going to- never mind, you can wait here for your parents to come. They'll pick you up here, right?"
"Yeah, outside the Bushwell," Freddie shrugged.
"Okay then. You know that you can always plop on our couch and eat all the food from our fridge, watch our TV, sleep in our beds-"
"Carly?" Freddie interrupted her with a raised eyebrow and half-smile. "What's the point?"
"Nothing, I just felt the need to tell you." She quickly took her jacket and stormed of the apartement. "Bye!" she added before slamming the door.

Sam and Freddie were watching TV and eating. They almost didn't talk, they were too nervous. After one and a half hours, Freddie finally spoke.
"We should go, Sam, it's 7:25. Our parents will be here in five."
"No. I'm not going anywhere."
"Is the Sam 'I'm not scared of anything' Puckett really so terrified?" Freddie mocked her. She punched him in the guts and gave him a death glare.
"The fact that I'm nervous won't stop me from beating you up, dipwad."
"C'mon, Sam, we have to go! I'm sure that our parents are not dating," Freddie assured her. He was going to hug her, but the idea left his mind quickly. He didn't need a broken arm or concussion.
"I hope they are."
"Huh?"
"I'm not losing the bet, Benson!" The bet. He almost forgot about it. He tried not to think about it and stay calm. What could Sam possibly do to him? Pssh... Oh god.
"Come on, we gotta go." He offered her his hand. She looked at him, amused.
"You really think I'm gonna take your hand?"
"You need to squeeze something to make your nervousness go away and I really need someone who will reassure me." Sam rolled her eyes and interwined her fingers with his. "You're not squeezing."
"I'm not nervous! I just don't want you to pee your pants and embarass me in front of all the people in restaurant." He smiled at her meekly and she squeezed his hand a little. She didn't want him to know that she actually was a tiniest little bit nervous.
"Holy macarena! WhyAreYouTwoHolding- oh well, just tell me what happened." Here they go again.

A/N: Since I can't leave this story with a cliffhanger, I decided to make an alternative. You likey? No? Go away! xD So... you'll see if Sam and Freddie are step-siblings now. That'd be pretty weird, right? Oh well, we'll see.

That was just a filler chapter, if you didn't notice. But I promise you will LOVE the next one, if you're a Seddie shipper. And if you're not, why are you even reading this?

I DIDN'T want to make Spencer seem so gayish... but his character practically begs for it. His fake-boobs love inspired me.

If you read this all, could you leave a review? I don't feel like continuing this story, I really hate it and I need to cheer up.