Thank you to everyone who has reviewed this story so far, I love you guys so much!
This is a Nix one, so sorry if you don't like them but whatever, still review! :)
Despite some people saying that they don't know what gone is, I am going to publish it after this one. I already have it written so it will probably be up in a couple of day if I remember!
If people want, I can do a brief summary of Gone at the beginning of my next chapter, it will help with the understanding and I will try not give anything away :)
Enjoy!...
"I hate you!" She cries, slamming the heavy door into my face.
Oh dear. I have screwed up, again. Me and Six may not be perfect, but usually it doesn't go as far as shouting and fighting for real. To be honest, I'm not sure exactly what I did. I mean is accidentally breaking a picture in a frame and then making fun of her Cepan – jokingly – too bad?
It was kind of her fault really, I mean I wouldn't have crshed into the dresser if she hadn't of bumped me. Maybe I exaggerated a little and pretended to fall over, but can she blame me fully?
Now I think about it, maybe that photo was of her and her Cepan. Katarina was it? I don't know. The picture was of a young Six, maybe eight or nine years old, and she was with an older, dark haired, serious eyed woman. She reminded me a little of Six, they had the same hair, but her eyes were more like Marina's, you know, the whole 'I'm scarred and deeply serious' look. They were both standing in a park, next to a river. Six looked happy and the woman looked relaxed. A nice change, I think.
I'm such a dick.
"Six" I try, knocking gently on the door.
"Go away" She moans. Is she crying?
"Hey" I say, gently opening the door "What's the matter, it was just a picture"
Her head raises from her hands and she gives me a look that would reduce a Mog to ashes.
"Oh, Nine. Didn't I make it clear enough? Fuck. Off"
Ouch.
I move over to where she is sitting, ignoring her glare and groan.
"That was Katarina wasn't it" I say.
She looks up, surprised at the bluntness of the question. So I'm right then. That was Katarina, and that obviously means that there is something going on - or Six is just feeling really sensitive. I'm going to go for the first one.
"Seriously, what's wrong? I'm really sorry about the picture if that's what I did."
She shakes her head, her eyes looking past me and to the broken glass that neither of us bothered to pick up. What's up then? For a second I think she isn't going to talk, but she wipes away the tears with a shaky hand and sighs, turning towards me.
"It wasn't your fault, well, not really."
I wait for her to elaborate.
"Basically it's five years since Katarina died and it really got to me this time. I've been really quiet this morning, as you may have noticed. You breaking the frame was the last straw for me. I'm sorry I yelled at you."
Oh, oh. Now I feel extra terrible. I sigh and wrap my arms around her, bringing her into what I hope is a comforting hug. She sniffles, making herself small and leaning into me, a sad look on her face.
Seeing her this vulnerable is strange. I am used to the tough Six, the one who lets nothing get to her, brushes off any comment, faces any set back with determination and strength. I think that this is the first time I have ever had to comfort her, and definitely the first time I have even seen her cry.
In a way it's good I suppose, good that now I know she will let me comfort her, I am the one she comes to for support. A warm feeling spreads through my body, a content feeling and I am careful not to let her see my smile.
"She'd be proud of you, you know" I say against her hair, smiling as her arms hug me tighter.
"Sandor would be proud of you too" She whispers.
Sandor, how much do I miss him? Too much, way too much.
The others would say not enough I guess, because I never let them see it. But I do, I think about him all the time, and I dream about him too. Ella's and Marina's nightmares are the terrible, screamy kind, but what they don't know, what nobody knows – I have them aswell.
I don't cry out, or thrash wildly in my bed. Sometimes I don't even wake up, but in the morning I can always tell that they were there – even if they were only in the back of my mind. They hurt like hell.
We are all scarred, in different ways.
Some of us brush it off, like it's nothing. Others pretend that it was never there, it never happened. The ones who embrace it as part of who they are, they are the ones to be admired. Not me then, or Six. We may be the toughest, the hardest, the ones who are strong as stone, but in a way, we are the ones that are the ones that are the most broken.
It's just good to know that we have each others backs. I know that Six will always be there for me, I hope she thinks the same way about me. And as she snuggles her head into my chest – I wouldn't have it any other way.
Wow, who's being deep today Nine?
Did you like it? Sorry I kind of ruined it at the end, but it's kind of weird for Nine to be that philosophical :)
Don't forget to review!