"Come on now everybody, let's go. And Kamui, please be careful and watch your step." Warned Ringo-san as she gives me a stern look. I pursed my lips in a childish pout as Eltri chuckled in our mindscape. It had been raining the previous night and thus puddles of water were everywhere. It was just earlier today that I had slipped on the veranda, causing me to fall flat on my face.
Of course, my reaction was to laugh off the pain and even if there was a bruise, it would have been healed like all my other injuries. Unfortunately, the only thing I couldn't hide was the loud thudding, banging and yelping that I did which attracted the attention of both my aunt and Keiji.
And despite the obscene amount of training I had done for the past six years of my life, I couldn't recover fast enough from my position to prevent them from seeing my awkwardly sprawled form on the form.
Joy.
"I thought a stampede had come through the veranda." Said Keiji.
If I could stomp my foot I would. But alas, my butt hurts and I am in no position to do so.
"Kamui dear, are you alright?" Fretted my aunt as she helped me up to my feet. I shot the dark haired boy a dirty look before smiling back at the worried redhead.
"I'm fine Ringo-san, the floor was wet and I wasn't looking properly that's all."
"Please be more careful dear. Now hurry along, we need to get ready and leave in half an hour for the party."
It was a party for one of Ringo-san's mutal friend's son. Er… I think. I wasn't quite paying attention when she told us a couple of nights ago since Eltri was sieving through my memories without a care in the world. On the outside I had been calmly eating dinner. But on the inside, I was screaming like mad for my other self to stop raiding my personal things.
Feh, talk about self-control.
I hurried to my room and changed into the kimono that had been my present earlier this spring. It was a colorful thing really; it was dark blue, the same color as most of the yukata's I owned, with swirls of light green and orange goldfish swimming at the hem of the garment and it's sleeves.
While I was in love with this kimono of mine –I was quite fast in putting it on courtesy of Ringo-san- the colors clearly made me stand out. I was fair skinned but a bit paler than the usual, like some of the higher class people in Kirigakure apparently, my hair is a long untamable waves of platinum blonde hair that I like to keep in a braid and a pair of red eyes.
No one in Kiri had any of those characteristics as far as I knew. When the other kids were being particularly mean, they wouldn't allow me to play and called me 'creepy-eyes' till I ran back home crying. Keiji hadn't been with me then since he had fallen sick at the time and Ringo-san was busy preparing dinner so neither of them had noticed me coming back.
And while I did mention that I had played with other kids, I had only played a handful of times with them; and all had been with Keiji. I never dared to go out without him in fear of being teased again. Thankfully, I could preoccupy myself just fine with books and Ringo-san's lessons.
I had forgotten how mean kids could be.
I glanced at the books piled up at the corner of the room, I only had three at the moment but within time I knew that I would end up collecting more. With the allowance that we receive each month, Eltri had taken over and bought some medical books that would look incredibly silly for a five year old to buy. However the shopkeeper didn't even seem to bat an eye when we present the books on the counter and merely waved me off after the purchase was done.
When I had asked her what it's for but then she told me that it was going to be our next lesson. So now my routine was for me to read the book about chakra and the human body –more specifically the pressure points and the vital points- before doing the advance stretches after I wake up and before I go to bed. Save for Saturdays and Sundays; which is when I have to go and spar with Keiji.
Reading things like this is great and all, but how am I supposed to gain actual experience if I have nothing to practice on?
Oh you will soon enough.
I am not going to do it to Keiji.
I never said anything about the boy. Besides, I want you to memorize all of them by the end of the year.
What?
Oh and don't worry about the practical, I got that part covered. Just focus on memorizing them. I'll be quizzing you as well so be prepared~
Once Ringo-san had made sure that everything was ready, we were pretty much ushered out to the house and into the main street. However to my utter disbelief, shame and embarrassment, I slipped and nearly fell into a nearby puddle. My kimono was almost ruined!
Keyword, almost.
Keiji seems to take this as a cue to slip his hand into mine and tugged me along. I huff at him and could feel Eltri's amusement tickling above the surface of my skin. Even without looking back, I could tell that Ringo-san has found this appealing since she was emitting a rather positive emotion. It felt like butterflies in my stomach; but not the bad kind if you know what I mean.
The moment I had become aware of chakra, Eltri was able to unlock one of her abilities. Not only am I able to always know who and where people are –even when they're releasing just the barest amount of chakra- I'm also able to feel their emotions within a certain range.
The latter is a bit complicated and similar to synesthesia. See, let's say there's three people standing in a room and are feeling three different types of emotions. The moment I step into the room, I first would l feel as if I've been rammed to a wall, suffocate and finally crushed by gravity or buried alive under a pile of boulders.
Because I wouldn't feel them one by one; I would have felt all of them at the same time. But it's definitely worse if they're all feeling negative emotions.
Certain words and sounds also feels differently for me. For example, saying Keiji's name or hearing his name is the same as soaking in lukewarm water. The warm tingly feeling that quickly spreads all over you… It's also like how his chakra feels. My name on the other hand, feels like the gentle push and pull of the water as you float.
Eltri had advised me to use it bit by bit to get used to it but only when I know that there isn't a lot of people –my current maximum is 3 and that's already a stretch- and at the very least, there should be one person that I am personally close with to lessen the… stress. I'm just thankful that this ability of hers is something that I could turn on and off by will and not something I have to go through each time I sense my surroundings.
We ended up walking to the central part of the village where the well-off citizens are living in. It was just about ten in the morning and the mist isn't as thick; I could spot a large compound up ahead with and sense a number of people inside.
"Ringo-san, where are we going again?"
"It's the wedding of one of Nobutsuna's former student." Replied my aunt. "Your father would be joining us later on as well. He just needs to settle some things at work first." Keiji and I nodded. When we made it into the compound, we were immediately greeted by the guards. After verifying that we were indeed invited guests, we made our way to the main hall.
Someone's coming.
Who-
And then I was hit with the distinctive sense of rain. The smell, sound and feel of rain. The coolness of the water didn't feel heavy but instead soothing. All I know that despite how heavy it was raining, it felt nice.
"Hello Akaashi-san."
I blinked out of my trance. A pair of strangers was standing in front of us; one an adult, the other a child our age. They were distinctively similar with both physical appearance and their presence since they both reminded me of standing underneath a pouring rain.
"Ah, if it isn't Yamamoto-san and Takeshi-kun! Hello to you both!" Chimed the redhead. I looked over to both Yamamoto's. They were lightly tanned with similar short dark hair and caramel eyes. The younger boy smiled and made a quick bow to my aunt before looking over to me and Keiji.
The moment our eyes met, his smile widened and I swear that for a second time had stopped. "Nice to meet you!" And then my heart had just skipped a beat. This boy right here is the literal definition of adorableness.
…
Bloody hell, don't tell me I have a crush on a five year old child?!
*cough*cough* Craddle snatcher.
Shut it.
I forced my face to remain neutral despite the fact that I could feel it flushing to an embarrassing color. "Hello." I squeaked and immediately half-hide myself behind my aunt while Keiji did a more formal. "Hello."
The older Yamamoto laughed heartily while the younger one was practically beaming sunshine. My face colored even more.
"This is my son and niece, Keiji and Kamui. Children, this is Yamamoto Tsuyoshi and his son Takeshi-kun."
"I suppose that we are both early yes?" Laughed Tsuyoshi. "I'm pretty sure Nobutsuna's coming right after he finishes whatever it is that's holding him back am I right?"
My aunt laughed. "Yes indeed. Come now, why don't we head in and visit Kimiko-chan and Daisuke-kun before the other guests starts to come."
When we reached the main hall, I was a bit overwhelmed by the number of people running here and there as they set up the last minute decorations. "Since the whole thing doesn't actually start until 11, why don't we let the kids play by themselves to preoccupy them?" Suggested Tsuyoshi.
Apparently the Yamamoto's were somehow related to Daisuke Wakama, the groom, and that Takeshi had been here at least a thousand times or so. The dark eyed boy lead the Keiji and I to the yard which already had several other children playing Ninja.
"Come on! Let's play too!" Cried Takeshi as he pulled on the sleeves of my kimono.
Anxiety consumes me as I remembered the treatments I received from the other children. "Um, n-no thanks… I'll just- uh, be the referee!"
Takeshi's smile turned into a small frown, "You sure?" I don't even have to look at Keiji to know that he was also looking at me. Assessing me. The boy was too smart for his age if he noticed my sudden discomfort.
"Yes." I said with all the conviction I could muster. "It looks like you have enough people already, and I think my aunt would be upset if I dirty my clothes. Plus I can't even run in these even if I wanted to so it wouldn't be fair to me!"
Takeshi seems to understand and accept my explanation with a nod but Keiji made no motion to acknowledge what I just said. I don't miss the way Keiji's eyes staring longer at me than needed as he's pulled by Takeshi to join the group of children.
I sighed and sat myself on the veranda, watching them play and mentally keeping track of who was hiding where. Even from where I was, I could easily track down their presence and the other people in the house. And then suddenly I heard the sound of crashing waves roaring in my ears.
I jumped and whipped my head to the side expecting some old ninja elder with decades of experience in war but instead it was just a boy. A boy my age. My heart begins to beat like crazy and it felt as if it was trying to break out of my ribcage. My skin prickled and all the hair on my arms and the back of my neck are standing straight.
The fact that the loud crushing presence/chakra belonged to a mere boy instead of anything else I had been imagining had left me dumbstruck. I knew staring is rude but I couldn't help it!
The boy's appearance was recognizable but you couldn't quite put a finger as to where you had seen him before. However, the nagging feeling was forced to a corner as disbelief took over. As he came closer, I saw his pupiless staring back to me and after a few seconds he tilts his head to the side and said, "Staring is rude."
The sound of roaring waves hasn't died down but they were slowly calming.
"You're a boy." I blurted.
His brows furrowed into a V. "Obviously." Said the boy with as much annoyance as a six year old could muster. A mild spark of discomfort in my chest reminded me that I haven't turn off my ability and that I was still under its effect.
"I'm sorry, that was rude." I apologized. "I thought you were someone else." I tried again, this time in a much calmer tone. I turned to fully face the boy and sat myself down in a more comfortable position. I flashed him a sheepish grin but unfortunately, he hasn't forgiven me yet.
"And just who were you expecting?" He fired back with his hands across his chest.
"Nobody. I just felt your presence and thought you were someone else." I hurried on, putting my hands up in defense.
"My presence?" He echoed, his anger and annoyance melting away into curiosity. I licked my lips as the taste of sea salt ice cream invaded my tongue. "You mean my chakra?" He presses and the taste becomes even stronger. Something stirs inside of me and I couldn't help but notice the details of my surroundings.
"Yes." I could smell the grass, the dirt, the humidity and the faint incense from within the house. I could hear the sound of the children laughing and screaming. I could feel their joy, the rush, the adrenaline that they felt. I could taste the boy's curiosity like sea salt ice cream and feel his chakra brushing just across the skin of my arms.
"Like the rolling waves of the ocean; strong, loud and unstoppable. It's the first time I felt something like that." I mumbled in a daze. Despite having my senses on hyperaware, it was this boy's sole presence that overpowered them all. When he suddenly took a step forward, a bold step forward, I also felt something else.
Confusion, loneliness, weariness and a sense of being lost.
Loneliness.
My chest aches and suddenly I couldn't breathe.
The last thing I remember was having felt the pull in my mind and realizing that Eltri had switched with me. She had said something that caused the boy's eyes to widen in surprise before our body shuts down.
My last coherent thought were that his eyes were like brightly colored amethyst.
/
Sensing his presence while activating your senses was too much for you. Rest for now.
But-
Good night.
Eltri then replayed a scene; her favorite scene of her past. Every time I watched it, I could feel her emotions. I could feel her happiness, her delight; the sense of happiness where you wished that it could just go on forever. I liked that memory of hers but at the same time it showed...
How lonely I was.
Right. That's probably why I passed out.
Activating my senses makes me far more sensitive to everything including negative emotions. The loneliness I had felt from him brought my own feelings roaring back to life. The ones that I had tried to squash down and suppressed. The ones that I had begged to god to keep it under control. In my past life, it had worked.
I don't know how and I don't know when it started but I was able to create a defense mechanism for myself. When someone yells, screams or even angry or disappointed in me, I felt nothing. I felt numb. It wasn't as if I became sassy as hell and sassed back at them all, I didn't say anything. I couldn't say anything. I just felt numb. My face goes blank, my posture doesn't say intimidated or angry.
Nothing. In the face of those emotions I felt nothing. I said nothing.
And after they've said their piece, I couldn't even get mad at them back. Because my emotions were all numbed. There was no fear holding me back, no anger clouding my judgment. I can easily look at them all in the eye and say, "Is that all?" or "So what?" and I won't even feel guilty about it. I don't even feel worried about it.
At first I thought it was a good thing. I felt it was a good thing. But then after for so long, I became afraid. I was afraid I couldn't feel anymore. How was I supposed to act? What was I supposed to say? Who can I tell? Should I even tell anyone? But isn't that expecting too much of them?
Wouldn't they then feel obligated to try and make me feel better? Was that selfish of me? How could I even tell them? Would it even make sense to them? Is something wrong with me?
A small part of me says yes and a large part of me says no. No nothing is wrong. Everything is fine. Nothing could hurt me. Nothing can hurt me. Nothing will hurt me. I will be fine. I am fine. Everything is fine. I have never thought that I was suffering. I never felt that I was suffering from my inability to feel. But… I was so out of touch with my own emotions that when I shared Eltri's ability, it practically overwhelmed me.
The loneliness I felt from that boy was an echo to my own. I couldn't reach out to anybody in fear of not being understood. Of being mocked, hated, humiliated, undermined, used, exposed-
The list could go on forever.
I was so afraid. I was so numb. I was so lonely.
And after I felt the boy's loneliness, I realized that I was still all of that too.
When I woke up, I felt –warm, lukewarm water- Keiji more than I saw him. I was back in my room and everything was in complete darkness. Keiji is curled next to me on my bed and he is close enough for me to feel his breath on my skin. I don't dare move in fear of waking him up but both my back and legs were desperately in need of stretching.
"Keiji." I whispered.
"Kamui?" Came his immediate reply. Ah, so he wasn't asleep just yet. I heard him shuffle on the bed and his body heat quickly warmed my own despite already being under a blanket.
"What happened?"
"Chakra exhaustion. That's what father said anyway. You okay?"
"…"
"Kamui?" Keiji presses and his hand is suddenly on my bicep. He was shaking.
"Kamui what's wrong?" His voice is breaking, his breathing is hitched. All the signs that he's on the verge of crying.
"Kamui say something!" I'm waiting for the guilt to consume me but there was nothing. I felt nothing as I watch, hear and feel my childhood friend breaking, hurting and worrying.
What is wrong with me?
"Kamui-"
"Keiji, don't cry."
Don't cry because there is nothing I can do to comfort you.
Don't cry because I am not worth your tears.
Don't cry because I am not worth your love and care.
Don't cry because I won't be able to stop your tears.
Don't cry because I wouldn't know what to do or say.
Don't cry because I'm oh so very selfish.
"Please don't cry." I mumbled with a dry throat.
But he cries anyway. He cries and buried his head to my shoulder. His knees are pressed awkwardly against my own and our position is incredibly uncomfortable. But I don't have the heart nor strength to push him away. I pat on his back in a slow rhythm and hummed a tune. Keiji pulls on to me even tighter and I could feel his tears soaking through my clothes.
I didn't know how long we stayed like that or who feel asleep first. All I know is that when I wake up for the second time, Keiji is still here and that he was gripping on to my hand as if it was a lifeline. After that it was often for Keiji to sleep over in my room. Not as close as the time I suddenly passed out, but I think he just wants to reassure himself that I was still there before he goes to sleep and when he wakes up.
/
For the next few months I was brought in and out of the hospitals for checkups and tests. All results showed that I was perfectly normal and that there was nothing wrong with me save for the insane chakra reserves I had. Nobutsuna-san became stricter during training, always watching me and Keiji like a hawk and Ringo-san as well.
Eltri had told me that something was wrong. The fact that they were both acting like this, being so out of character, even after the hospital said that I was fine meant something was wrong. There was something that they weren't telling me. But I didn't dare ask and Eltri doesn't press anymore than that.
I now have a curfew and was expected to be asleep by the time which was no problem at all since both adults have exhausted both my mental and physical stamina by the end of the day. We met with Tsuyoshi and Takeshi far more frequently by now. Takeshi had even stayed over and trained along with us for more than a couple of times. I had been overjoyed by this and it was also a good thing that Keiji seem to have taken a liking to Takeshi as well.
Once my new schedule had settled, the next big thing to happen was us entering the academy. And it was during roll call that I met the boy who's curiosity tasted like sea salt ice cream.
"-Yagura."
"Here."
I stiffened and even against Eltri's warning, turned on my senses. I knew that voice. I could easily single it out against the other noises. And just like before, the sound of crashing waves roared in my ears; overwhelming everything else in the room entirely. Just sitting two rows in front of me, the messy haired boy stiffened and slowly looked over his shoulder. The taste of sea salt was just as strong as the first time and his eyes, even when they widened in surprise was still a brilliant color of amethyst.
Realization quickly hit me like lightning.
That's why, he was so familiar. This boy right here, the boy who's chakra drowns everything else with the roar of crashing waves, who's curiosity tasted like sea salt ice cream and eyes like brightly shining gems… was Yagura.
Authors Note
So sorry for the long wait everybody, but here it is a new chapter. And yes, if you have noticed a pattern, only those who Kamui makes a comparison too will play a big part in her life/story. Eltri's powers are utterly OP in my opinion but then the consequences are incredibly severe as well. It's something so that Kamui doesn't rely too much on it. This is a rather slow build up and there are still several other characters (I think) that I want to introduce before we move on to the genin days.
If you have questions regarding how Kamui's new powers work, feel free to ask me. And thank you all so much for following and putting this on your favorite list! Until next time!