Paper Clouds
Chapter 4
By Mia Vortice
*All Standard Disclaimers Apply: This is a work of fiction.
Azula never had a childish, innocent giggle. At least, not that Zuko could remember. She had a knowing laugh, though high pitched, as a child. It was always as if she knew something he didn't, which was often the source of his ire, but she was still his sister and she sincerely enjoyed playing with her brother, even going as far as to 'give in' to whatever game he wanted to play, as long as she was included.
The laughter that filled the air around him was that same laugh that he remembered. He knew who it belonged to, even though he couldn't see her clearly. All he saw were brief flashes of red and gold before she disappeared around corner. He could see a shrinking shadow in the distance, but her laugh...
"Zuko! Zuzu, hurry up!" she half taunted and half demanded of him. "You're too slow, Zuzu!"
"Azula, wait," he called, somewhat confused. "Where are you going?" She still sounded like the child he had left behind and in the back of his mind, he wondered why she still sounded like that. She was twenty-one now; he kept track of her birthday. Azula should've sounded older. Regardless of how odd it was, he continued to follow her.
"This way, Zuzu!" He sped up, following her voice as he stumbled forward through the familiar pillar lined corridors.
"Azula!" he shouted once more. He rounded a corner and found himself heading towards a set of large, open doors. He could smell something burning and crinkled his nose. Was something on fire? That was a stronger scent than the candles or the lanterns in the hall could produce.
He skidded to the stop at the open doors, preparing to rush in, only to freeze as the heat bore against his face. His arms immediate went up, shielding his face from the bright, hot yellow and orange flames.
"Zuko!" That wasn't Azula's voice any longer. Wide gold eyes peered past his lifted arms as his heart slammed against his chest. No...he couldn't be seeing what he was. Pain filled his face as he reached out.
"Mother!"
It was all just as he remembered it. The fire everywhere - climbing the curtains and tapestries, consuming the bed and the wooden pillars. The heat was scorching to the point that he could almost feel his skin blistering. The smell of the burning wood surrounded him and right in the very center of the room, a piece of a ceiling beam had collapsed, trapping a lone woman in red robes behind it.
"Zuko!" Her eyes had the same desperate plea that had been seared into his memory years ago. "Zuko!"
"Mother!" His usual logic and sense were forgotten. Despite the danger, he made a move to rush forward. He was an adult now, not the child who had been helpless to do anything. This time he could save her! He took a deep breath and narrowed his eyes. He'd just bend the fire out, make the path to the door clear, and his mother would be safe.
"Yes, Zuko," her voice urged as he moved towards her. "Come to me! Join me!"
His blood ran cold. That was his mother's voice, but those were not her words that night. This was off, his mind screamed. Everything was off. Azula hadn't even been there that night; she was at school. His mother had screamed for him to leave. Lastly, and most painfully, he no longer had a mother to save.
"This isn't real," he whispered as his arms lowered. He shook his head as he took a step back, his head pounding. "This can't be-"
"Zuko! Don't just stand there! Help me!" the woman trapped behind a wall of flames and fallen beams cried out. "Come here and help me!"
He grit his teeth. She looked like his mother. She sounded like Ursa, but she wasn't. "This isn't real!" he shouted. "You're not my mother!" He knew that, but he still couldn't tear himself away.
"Zuko, won't you stay with your me?" the woman asked, confused. She extended her hands. "Zuko, join me. I'm your mother." She moved forward. A sharp gasp escaped his lips as she walked through the fallen beams. "Join me, Zuko."
"No!" he shouted as he whirled around. He slammed into another figure waiting behind him and stumbled back, surprised to see her there.
A child was standing with her black hair in a neat topknot, pinned with a flame. Her small figure was draped in white robes instead of her favorite red, black, and gold academy uniform. She had to be called back from school, Zuko remembered.
She didn't know why until she got back to the palace. She had been confused; why were the halls draped with white banners and lanterns? Why didn't their mother meet her at the gate, as always? It had been the first and last time he had seen his younger sister cry.
That pair of angry, gold eyes rose and met his. "Where's Mother?" Her voice was cold and sharp.
"Azula," Zuko mumbled as he tried to look away. Her head was lowered and her arms were at his side, but her eyes were boring into his accusingly. "Azula, I-"
"Answer me!" she screeched, forcing Zuko back. Hateful eyes burned into him and Zuko whirled back around.
His eyes widened. The room on fire and their mother were gone. In their place, a courtyard that seemed to stretch on was lined with tell-tale white banners and lanterns. Zuko knew exactly what those meant and felt sick. They signaled the period after Princess Ursa had died.
"No...," he wheezed as he turned around. He didn't want to remember that part of his life. He didn't want to remember the consuming pain. He faced the child figure once more. His usually proud sister was trembling in her white mourning robes.
"Where's Mother!?" Azula screamed once more, her eyes brimming with tears. She gritted her teeth as she looked at him hatefully. "You left her!" she spat out. "You left her to die!"
"No!" Zuko shouted, taking a step forward and holding his hands up to try to calm the figure of his younger sister. "I didn't-"
"You abandoned her! You let her die!" Azula screamed. "She didn't deserve to die! It should've been you!" Zuko felt his chest clench as he jerked his head back. "You should've died instead of Mother! This is all your fault!"
"It's not!" Zuko choked. He didn't know he'd find his mother trapped within a burning room that night. He didn't know what had happened, but it wasn't that he didn't want to help. He had been screaming for help one moment and when he awoke, he was outside and that wing of the palace collapsed on itself.
Azula disappeared in front of him, but he could still hear her voice taunting him. "It's all your fault! You should've been the one to die!"
The hall had vanished and Zuko stumbled back. The walls were gone. The high ceilings no longer towered above him. Instead, he stood on the edge of a volcano, looking down into a pit of lava and fire. Bits of fallen of pillars floated and burst into flames in the pool below.
"Jump, Zuko," Azula's voice ordered behind him. "Jump and take mother's place!"
The banished prince turned around, about to yell that this wasn't real when something grabbed his ankle. He caught himself before he tumbled backwards and looked down at his foot. A burn covered hand was tightly grasping him.
"Join me, Zuko." He could feel her hanging from him, pulling him towards the edge where she was crawling from. Her clothes were steaming, torn and burnt. Her hair was on fire and her skin covered with red welts. He couldn't breathe. "Join me!"
"No!"
"Zuko?" She ignored manners in favor of calming the gnawing worry inside of her as she rushed through his open doorway. "Zuko?" she hissed into the darkness, demanding that he respond and acknowledge his safety.
No answer came and Katara stood in the middle of the modest room. She turned in her spot, her eyes raking critically over the room, hoping to find some sign of Zuko still there. The window was partially closed and no struggle had taken place from the look of everything still in their spots and in order.
She hoped that maybe he had just gone outside to relieve himself and left the door open in a half-asleep state.
Blue eyes settled on a pair of shoes by his bed. Her lips tugged into a deeper frown. If he had gone outside, why would he go barefoot? His bed seemed slept in, but his blankets had been kicked to the side in a hurry.
Katara turned around once more. There were no firebenders hiding in the shadows of the room and she drew her attention back to the door. Outside, a little girl was waving her hands, trying to get her attention.
"Where is he?" she asked in a shaky voice as she stepped forward. "Where's Zuko?"
The child darted from the door. Katara's eyes widened and she shot after her. She didn't bother closing his door or hers as she ran down the corner, following the soaking child as the child ran through the front doorway. Katara shot through the opening and stumbling outside, frantically trying to find the ghost child.
It was still dark and the air was chill. She could smell a sea breeze from the distance stronger than it had been that day. She stumbled to a stop and turned around. The door had been left open - Zuko must've come outside. Katara turned around warily. There was still no sign of anyone in front of the inn or on the street.
A movement caught her eye and she saw the child once more. She was running down the street, towards the last direction Katara wanted to go. Her stomach twisted with dread as she realized the likelihood of Zuko heading back to forest became greater. Her breaths deepened as she forced herself focus and go forward.
She ran after the child. With every step she took, she hoped that Zuko would appear. She hoped that she would run into him before he had gotten too far. She hoped that she would find him returning and that she could just yell at him for scaring her and then they could return to the inn and pretend it didn't happen.
But the child kept running, and Katara after her.
The edge of the village was fast approaching and at its borders, the lone path that lead back into an unusually dark forest.
Every muscle in Katara's body tensed. Her chest tightened, immediately remembering what had happened just hours earlier. Ahead of her, the little girl stopped. She turned around, her brows knit together confused as she watched Katara come to a halt. Wide blue eyes were staring ahead of her, a terrified expression on her face as her legs locked, refusing to take her a step further.
"Zuko," she wheezed as she fell to her knees. Her arms were limp at her sides as she crinkled her eyes and shook her head. "You swore..."
He said he wouldn't go. He told her - swore that he wouldn't go into the forest not a few hours ago and now she found herself sitting helplessly in front of the foreboding treeline, knowing full well that he was in there.
Katara's chest rose and fell unevenly as her body trembled. It was a cool and crisp night, but she could feel something coming from the darkness just steps away. It was a heavy, ominous feeling and it was malicious.
Her eyes crinkled up. Her brown hands tightened into fists at her sides and shook. She couldn't turn back now. He was in danger and she was his friend. Isn't that what she had said to him before? Friends. Katara clenched her teeth. She wouldn't abandon him. What did Zuko ever do to deserve such anger, anyway?
"Go to the Avatar." Her voice was low and serious, but it was shaking. The child who had stopped and was staring at her confused, tilted her head to the side. Katara's eyes flickered and met those of the spirit. "Please," she said as steadily as she could. "Go to the Avatar. Go to Aang! Bring him to us!"
Gathering all the determination she had, Katara plowed forward before her body locked up once more and refused to let her go. She rushed past the ghost child, running into the dark forest while she still had the strength to.
The wet fountain girl turned around. She couldn't go into the forest; the angry spirits within would absorb her. She had felt their malicious intent all the way to her fountain, but when she saw the waterbender and earthbender's friend running out of the inn, surrounded by dark shadows, she knew she had to wake the woman who tried to save her spirit.
Now, the kind woman needed her help once more and the child began to wander back, trying to figure out who the Avatar was. Was it the earthbender? But she couldn't sense her at all.
A snort and a low growl caught her attention. The spirit lifted her head and turned towards the old stables at the edge of town. Her eyes widened as she saw the massive, furry beast pushing against his stable doors, trying to get out. It was an air bison.
Deeper into the forest, Katara had readied herself for the onslaught of negative emotion and angry, clawing spirits that had bombarded earlier that day. She grit her teeth, prepared for a mass of dead to appear in in the dark and come to her.
The heavy, suffocating feeling still lingered in the air. The remnants of their deep seeded emotions at the time of their deaths could be felt all around her, but as she slowed her steps, she realized that none had appeared. She looked around. This was where she was earlier. The old foundations of the first colony were just a few paces away. The path they were on curved around it.
Katara remained on edge as she went from a determined run to a hesitant walk. This was different from that morning. Where were the spirits? Where were the ghosts crying out to her; appearing and desperately trying to get her attention? Why did them missing seem to make the very situation so much more alarming?
A heavy breath escaped her lips as she took another step and and looked around. No spirits. No Zuko, either.
Her eyes narrowed. "Zuko!" she shouted. Her voice seemed far too loud for the silent forest, but she persisted. "Zuko, where are you!?" He didn't answer, but she knew he was there. That knowledge only worsened the anxiety building within her. "Zuko, answer me!" she demanded.
She caught a movement from the corner of her eye and whirled around. Her lips opened to call out his name, only to have her jaw snap shut as the movement wasn't a barefooted, sleep attired firebender. That man was a soldier. Katara took a step back. Burnt and broken armor, cuts along his body, and ripped clothes signaled someone who had long been dead.
She turned her head away and darted forward, only to stop before she ran into or through another dead soldier. Katara sucked in a sharp breath as she drew her arms up. Chills ran through her body as the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. They weren't the only ones. There were more.
Katara jerked her head from side to side. She could make out more soldiers walking towards her and coming from the open field surrounding the colony remains. Their hands were reaching out and Katara grit her teeth.
"No!" she shouted as her hands grasped the sides of her head. "No! I'm looking for Zuko!" she yelled as she closed her eyes tightly and blindly rushed forward, hoping to get away from them.
"Help," she heard their voices pleading with her. "Help him!"
Katara felt hot tears gather at her eyes. She stumbled to a stop and turned around, lowering her arms as she blinked back the tears and look towards the fallen spirits. She strained her breathing, trying to calm herself and focus once more.
"Tell me where he is!" Katara pleaded. "You must've seen him!" She eyed their tattered old uniforms. "He is Fire Nation!"
They didn't answer. The soldiers slowly walked towards her, extending their hands. Katara shook her head wildly. There were so many who died. From what the others had told her, she thought those who had fallen there would be Earth Kingdom citizens.
Her heart froze. The Earth Kingdom citizens who had died. Her eyes darted through the amassed dead soldiers. There was not a single Earth Kingdom dead amongst them, but that day, those who had grabbed on to her and suffocated her with their desperation and anger had been Earth Kingdom dead. Those who had swarmed Zuko just as she passed out had been Earth Kingdom dead.
"Zuko!" Katara cried out as she whirled around. "Zuko! Where are you!?' she screamed into the night as her heart sank. "Zuko, answer me! Please!" The longer the silence went on, the more she felt like falling apart.
Surely, the fountain girl had come to warn her as soon as she could, right? Zuko couldn't have gotten too far! Yet, even as she tried to make sense of it all, she knew that Zuko was already in danger. Panic spread through her quickly and her hands grasped at her tangled brown hair as she stood in place, trembling with fear.
This was not happening. This was not happening.
How could she, a trained healer, help the dead, but be unable to save a living friend? Wave after wave of helplessness slammed into her. What had she done wrong? What had Zuko done wrong?
She grit her teeth as she stumbled forward, wavering down the worn path. Her shallow breathing was making her light headed and she stopped, falling to her knees once more. The air was thicker the further she got from the old foundations. She could barely breathe.
That was odd.
Her chest rose and fell with a labored breath once more and she lifted her head. The farther she was getting from the old foundations, the more she was feeling that stifling air that had surrounded her earlier. Had the spirits moved?
Her eyes widened. She snapped her head over her shoulder. The soldiers were still coming towards her, but seemed too tied to the fallen colony to reach her quickly. Their arms were extended and they were reaching for her.
Katara narrowed her eyes. No, they weren't reaching for her. They were pointing. Katara turned back to the path and squinted. She could feel the air become thicker ahead and where it was thicker, there were bound to be more angry spirits.
Where there were angry spirits, there would be Zuko.
Katara grit her teeth and pushed herself up. Her knees wobbled as she stumbled forward. "Breathe, Katara, breathe," she chanted quietly to herself as she forced her breathing to even as Aang and the monks had taught her. She needed to maintain control. She needed to be calm and focus.
She couldn't risk the fear overwhelming her when someone's life was on the line. She struggled through the thick air and the pressure that weighed her down. Sweat gathered at her temples as she continued forward.
Katara could see the break in the trees. Beyond it, she could hear the crash of the waves against the rocks, at the base of the cliffs. Unlike earlier, when the sea breeze filled the area, she could only feel a heavy, suffocating, still air. As she broke through the forest, she could see why.
A mass of spirits were concentrated on the very edge of the cliff. They were spilling over the edge and were clinging or tugging at someone in the center. She instinctively knew who the spirits were surrounding and screamed.
"Zuko!" The figure in the center began to move. The dead hanging off of him continued to weigh him down, but Katara could see the man standing dumbly amongst them. Her heart skipped a beat as her eyes flickered to the cliff's edge he was far too close to. She stepped forward and extended her hands. "Zuko! Zuko, can you hear me!?"
The blank eyes of the dead turned towards her and she stopped in mid step. She had been noticed.
Angry yells escaped the coil of tangled spirits around Zuko as several flew towards her. Katara screamed and raised her arms to shield herself. She shut her eyes, but still felt the pressure nearly knock her down.
She could feel hands clawing at her limbs, trying to hold her back.
"Zuko!" she cried out as she forced herself to focus on him. "Answer me!"
His eyes crinkled up as he heard her voice. "Katara?"
"Don't move, Zuko!" she cried out breathlessly as she forced herself through the seemingly solid-bodies.
He was still, but could feel the weight on his shoulders, pulling him back. His brows furrowed, confused. Was he dizzy? He could feel himself swaying slightly. Was it the fumes from the fire? But there hadn't been a real fire, had there? He was so confused.
"Zuko!" Again, he heard her voice and turned, confused. What was Katara doing in the Fire Nation?
He could make out the panic on her face as she stumbled forward. Smoke was all around, trying to pull her back. Zuko's heart shot to his chest. His eyes widened and he moved forward, extending his arm towards her. He wouldn't allow her to be another victim. "Katara!"
"Take my hand!" she cried out. He took another step forward and hope bubbled within her. He was listening! A wry smile dared to tug at her lips. "Another step, Zuko! You're almost there!"
The black-haired man lifted a leg and felt a force pull him back. His foot flew down, trying to stabilize himself as he swayed. Katara let out a horrified cry.
Odd, he thought to himself: he couldn't move. Why couldn't he move? His eyes crinkled up as he tried to breath. The air was thick and heavy. It no longer smelled of smoke and ash, but it was hard to breathe. Zuko tried again and winced. His chest rose and fell, but could hardly fill up with air. He blinked.
He stumbled.
They were congregating around him. Pulling and pushing. She could see the expression on his face as he struggled to breathe. They were suffocating him, as they had done to her. Katara could see his body wavering and inching towards the edge. She grit her teeth and pushed forward, trying to ignore the pressure pushing against her and holding her back.
She was fighting something. Her face was determined and her narrowed eyes were damp. Zuko frowned and tried to lean forward, fighting his sudden headache and dizziness to reach for her.
"Katara..." His voice tightened. Her name was wheezed more than it was actually said. She was close to him and there was a look of panic on his face as the weight behind him dragged him back. She lunged forward.
His fingertips barely brush hers as she reached him, but it was too late. They had been too close to the edge, too overwhelmed. They fell back and were falling.
In an instant, the weight that had surrounded them and pulled them back and down vanished. The rush of the wind swept around them, bringing them back to reality as they plummeted.
In the back of her mind, she knew she had to waterbender to save them; to have the water come up and cushion their fall. But her body wouldn't obey her orders and as they fell, she was angry. How could she put souls to rest, but couldn't even save the living. She couldn't even save her friend.
She felt arms wrap around her as Zuko twisted his body, maneuvering himself under her. Her eyes widened as he closed his and readied himself for impact. She didn't need to die because the spirits wanted him dead.
They didn't hear the roar of the sea below them or the shouts above. Neither saw the pillar of water rising quickly to catch them. Zuko's back slammed into it and water surrounded them.
She could hear voices, but couldn't make out what they were saying. Katara opened her eyes and inhaled sharply. She was knee deep in dried grass. To her right, a newly built settlement. Two her left, a large group of men marching towards it. Her eyes crinkled up as she grasped her pounding head.
Where was she? This wasn't the cliff. Did she die when they fell off? All she remembered was Zuko and water and then darkness.
"Stop where you are, Earth Kingdom villagers!" a man shouted from the settlement. "Stand down!"
"How dare you tell us to stand down in our own land! This is the Earth Kingdom!" another man at the head of the mob shouted back. "We've given you fair warning! Return to the Fire Nation!"
Katara couldn't breathe. Her head snapped from one side to the other as her heart slammed against her chest. The tension between the two groups was high and she knew the last provocation before complete chaos ensued was coming.
She stood not too far from a modest clay wall that surrounded a settlement. Standing between the newly built, little homesteads were a row of Fire Nation soldiers. Their uniforms were outdated compared to what she had seen the last time she was in the Fire Nation, but they were still easily identifiable, even in the dark. They looked to have been from the Souzin era.
But that was impossible.
"Hold steady," one of the soldiers said in a low voice as they eyed a group of approaching men. He seemed to have been the leader of the soldiers. He took a step forward and shifted into a fighting stance. "By order of the Fire Lord Souzin, this land has been claimed for the Fire Nation! We will not relent!"
"This is not your land!" Katara heard a familiar rumble around her and felt the earth move.
She instinctively ran forward. "Wait!" she shouted. She didn't make it more than two steps before someone grabbed her from behind. She screamed as she was pulled back against a solid body.
"It's not use, Katara!" a man's voice hissed in her ear. "They can't hear you! This is just a memory - a look into the past!"
She didn't know whether to cry or continue screaming. The arms around her, holding her back, didn't lower and she could only watch as the earth villagers attacked the soldiers and the soldiers fight back.
"What's going on, Zuko?" she choked as she watched the soldiers retaliate. They used firebending to shatter and detour the boulders flying towards them and back into the crowd of villagers. Yells were heard and Katara could see men from the settlement rushing out to join the fray. Katara shook her head. "What is this?"
"I think it's the skirmish that led to that tragedy Aang and Toph were talking about," Zuko said as he held her back. He tightened his arms around her as he felt her tremble and begin to choke back tears.
"This isn't working!" one of the younger villagers shouted. He turned to a small group behind him. "Forget the soldiers! Go straight through the settlement!"
The earth rumbled once more and large slabs of earth were overturned. They were lifted and used as shields against the firebenders. The villagers ducked behind the earth and then raged forward. Voices screamed as they broke through the line of soldiers and rammed into one of the settlements.
Enraged yells filled the night air and suddenly, a villager was set ablaze. Katara's hands flew to her mouth to cover her screaming as she watched the soldiers try to both contain the villagers rampaging through the settlement and help older villagers put out the fires that had been ignited all around the field.
Who was on what side started to blur. There was fighting. There was screaming. There were people trying to help other people. The Earth Kingdom villagers didn't seem to have wanted to actually hurt the colonists, just scare them into leaving, but one desperate action led to another.
And Katara was crying. Zuko shut his eyes tight and leaned forward, pressing his head against the back of hers as his hand rose and covered her eyes. Both of them knew what they saw had already happened and there was nothing they could do to stop it, but it was happening right in front of them, if they were actually there.
Zuko held the waterbender tighter. Was this what Katara always saw so vividly when it came to the dead? He could understand now why she had seen it as a curse and why she wanted her ability sealed. To have to watch people suffer and die, only to exist in the afterlife, tied down and still suffering was torture.
The screaming and yelling died down and Zuko dared open his eyes. He immediately narrowed them as he relaxed his hold on Katara and looked around.
The settlement was gone. The soldiers, the villagers, the burning bodies and fields had disappeared. He looked down at the dirt path they stood on and furrowed his brows. Was that it? Were they back?
"It's over," he rasped as he uncoiled his arms from around Katara.
She remained standing stiffly in front of him. Her eyes wide and staring ahead of her as her breathing struggled to stay even. "No," she replied in a strained voice. "It's not."
He furrowed his brows and looked at her before following her eyes out into the open area in front of them. He couldn't see anything or anyone. Dread filled him as he realized she did. He reached for her, only to have Katara move in front of him and face the field.
"Leave him alone," she said in a low voice. The malicious feeling was back and with it, the all too real bodies of burned and mutilated villagers stalking towards them. She gritted her teeth and glared. "He had nothing to do with your deaths!" They didn't stop.
"Katara, what's going on?" Zuko demanded behind her.
"I don't know what I can do to put them to rest, Zuko," Katara admitted in a helpless voice. "I don't know what to do. They aren't like the others...they won't find peace so easily." He scowled and stepped around her. Her eyes went wide. "What are you doing!?"
"They want me, right?" he said as he looked around. He couldn't see anyone or feel anything.
"Step back!" Katara growled as she grabbed his arm and tried to pull him behind her. "You don't understand! They're malicious ghosts, Zuko! They want to harm you!"
"And with good reason," he muttered, unheard, under his breath.
"Zuko, stay behind-" Her voice was cut off as she fell her to knees. She couldn't breath again. The weight of the spirits descended upon her and Zuko whirled around.
"Katara!"
"Run!" she shouted. They were trying to grab on to him and Zuko stopped. He could feel pressure around him once more. A look of confusion filled his face. He couldn't see anyone, but he couldn't move. Something was holding him. Katara shook her head. "Zuko, run! I can't help! I don't know how, so you have to get away before they get you!"
She looked frantic. Sweat glistened against her skin as she labored to breathe against whatever was pressing against her.
He narrowed his eyes. Of course Katara couldn't help. She could see them, but their anger was to him, or rather - the Fire Nation and his great-grandfather. The ghosts needed peace and he was the one who could give it to them.
He took a deep breath and bent down, resting on his knees as he faced the field where the assumed the spirits were. Ignoring Katara's yelling for him to get up and leave, he prostrated his body, bending over his legs and lowering his head to the ground. He kept his hands firmly resting before his head as he closed his eyes.
"I beg for the forgiveness of my ancestors' sins," he began in a firm, but humbled voice. "I beg forgiveness from those who have died at the hands of my people, brought forth from the actions of my forefathers. I beg for atonement."
"No!" Katara shouted as the spirits released their hold on her and began to congregate to the man bowing before them. "You should not be punished for crimes you did not commit!"
"And neither should you!" he shouted back, without moving from his position. He kept his head low as he grit his teeth. "Spirits, spare her," he pleaded quietly. "Do what you wish to me, but do not harm my friend."
"Zuko!"
He could feel a heavy weight around him and he grimaced. The air was heavy and his breath was growing short.
"The spirits gave me the gift to see and speak to the dead!" Katara shouted as she swept through the dead, trying to get to Zuko. "I said I would use what I see to help the restless dead, but I never said it would be at the expense of the lives of the living!"
Her hand clamped on to Zuko's shoulders and she felt a cool breeze sweep over them. She turned her head towards the source and felt her body automatically relax.
An elderly man stood beside them in long, neatly pressed red robes and long, white hair and beard. A red hat rested atop his head as his glowing eyes dulled back into normal pupils. She had never seen him before and wasn't sure if he was spirit or man.
"This is my burden to carry," he said in a low voice. "For I had failed to prevent this tragedy."
He was familiar and his presence was comforting. Katara said nothing as he moved in front of the two benders. His presence attracted the attention of the spirits. The pressure around them lightened as Katara watched the dead villagers follow the old man into the field.
"I will take responsibility for these souls," he told her. He stopped in the middle of the field and Katara watched as his eyes began to glow once more.
She realized who he was. "Avatar Roku?"
He didn't answer. Despite her efforts, she head felt heavy once more and her eyes began to close. She tiredly fell against her friend's body and succumed to nothingness once more.
The postmaster couldn't conceal his surprised expression as he looked at the imprint of the Fire National Royal Seal on the red and gold wax. His green eyes flickered to the golden-eyed man in front of him, carefully counting out the amount owed for postage. He didn't look exactly like a royal; his hair was an unruly, his clothes were clearly worn out.
"Do you know who you're sending this to-" The postmaster's voice was cut off as Zuko lifted his head and narrowed his eyes. This wouldn't be the first time he'd been questioned when he tried to mail something. He silently reached into his pocket and removed a carefully wrapped document.
"Yes," he replied in a low voice as he held open the paper. It was a Fire Nation passport for a royal stamped with both his uncle's royal stamp and his. "I'm sending it to my uncle and I would like it to get there quickly."
He pushed his money forward and the postmaster nodded. He quickly stamped the letter from Zuko and began counting Zuko's money. "It shouldn't take longer than two weeks to arrive, Your Highness."
The scarred man ignored the title and gave the older man a nod before turning around. He made it several steps to the door when another figure filled the doorway, looking surprised as she saw him.
"Zuko." She drew her head back and hesitated entering. He immediately lowered his eyes.
"Katara," he greeted lamely. A strained period of silence settled over them, as it had whenever they had been left in the same room together the last two days. "What are you doing here?"
The waterbender had her water skin slung over her shoulder and she was gripping a small packet in one hand. "I just wanted to send a letter home," she shrugged, lifting the packet carefully. "It's been awhile since I wrote home." She stepped into the modest building and looked at him curiously. "You?"
That was the most they've spoken in two days, he thought to himself, irritated. Before that, they spent quite a lot of time talking whenever they were together. The topics never seemed to matter. It could've been about food, pet preferences, bending, or what have you, but after that night on the cliff, they hardly spoke. What had silenced them?
"Same," he said. "I haven't written home in a while, either."
"Oh," Katara nodded. She stepped forward and he moved to the side to let her through. She headed to the counter and Zuko prepared to leave. "Hey, wait," she called behind him. He stopped at the doorway, looking a bit surprised as he looked over his shoulder. Katara reached the counter and handed the postmaster her packet. She met Zuko's eyes. "Give me a moment."
She offered him a hopeful smile and he returned it. His shoulders relaxed slightly as he stood patiently by the door, waiting for her to finish her business. It seems he wasn't the only one who was bothered that they hadn't spoken since they woke up two mornings earlier.
After what they had seen and been through, he really couldn't blame her for feeling confused or uncomfortable. The things she had seen could've traumatized anyone. He was sure it had traumatized him, and Katara had it worse. She had seen the dead attacking not only her, but him. The ordeal had mentally and emotionally drained them and it seemed that what they had gone through together was the last thing they wanted to talk about with each other.
Zuko had woken up first to the sound of Aang's frantic voice calling for them to wake up. They were just a few paces from the cliff's edge. He could hear the water crashing against the rocks below. When he had shifted, he felt her body draped across him. Her fingers were curled into his shirt, refusing to release him.
Aang had to pry Katara's fingers from him before allowing Toph to move Katara, who seemed to have had it worse than Zuko due to her 'gift'. The waterbender had been placed against Appa, who had curled into a ball to surround the woman protectively. Briefly, Zuko had wondered if there were any more spirits around.
When she had awoken, Zuko was sitting on the edge of the cliff with Aang. Their voices were low and all Zuko could do was tell the Avatar that Katara tried to shield him and that he blamed himself for putting her through such an ordeal. He had been reminded once more of his failure to save his mother and because of him, they almost lost Katara as well. While not exactly his fault, he acknowledged Aang's insistence, he was still deeply involved and that was enough to make it difficult for him to meet her eyes.
"I wouldn't bother them right now, Katara," Toph had told the waterbender solemnly as Katara's gaze settled on the firebender and looked ready to call to the man. "He's still a bit shaken by what happened and you still need to rest."
Her head still felt heavy and Katara nodded. "Is he alright?" she had asked.
"Yeah...at least, he's not physically hurt." Toph had taken a seat on the bison, beside Katara. "What about you? You're the one who is most susceptible."
It wasn't her the spirits were after. Katara nodded. "What happened?"
Toph had sighed heavily. "Appa nearly woke up the entire village trying to get to us. When Aang and I finally came outside, he didn't bother to let us ride him. He just took off. Aang and I ran after him. He led us to the edge of town and when we stopped to look at the stables he had broken out of, Aang said he felt something pulling him towards the forest. He said it felt like a warm, wet hand, but when he looked, there was no one there."
Katara had tilted her head back against Appa. S,o the girl at the fountain at done as she was told. Silently, the waterbender thanked the child. "And you went into the forest."
"Yeah," Toph had agreed. "It wasn't too hard to figure out that you two probably went in there." Then the earthbender had paused and crinkled her eyes. "Aang barely got to you guys," she had said quietly. "You two fell off the cliff."
Katara's eyes had darted back to the cliff's edge. Her skin had paled. It wasn't just a dream, then. They really had fallen off. "That wasn't my bending that saved us." She had been too petrified.
"It was Aang," Toph had confirmed. "When he got you back on to dry land, you were both knocked out. He said he felt them all around us and was worried about you two. That's when he decided to go into the Avatar state. I don't know what happened, but after he came out, Zuko woke up. We were all worried when you didn't."
Katara had shut her eyes tightly. She could still see Zuko teetering on the edge, surrounded by spirits pulling him down. There was anger and hate coming from the dead, but they had twisted his emotions as well. She could feel the pain around him. She could sense so much guilt and fear.
Toph had tensed as she heard Katara's near silent sniffling, which signaled tears. As Katara covered her face with her hands, Toph had called Aang and Zuko. Immediately, the two men had rose to their feet and were coming over.
"Katara!" Aang had called, concerned. His eyes looked saddened as he reached the trembling waterbender. "Katara, it's alright," he assured her softly as he knelt down in front of her. "It's alright. It's all over now, Katara. The spirits are at peace."
Knowing that didn't cleanse her of all the intense emotions she had felt. She had nodded her head understandingly, but couldn't stop crying. Katara had wiped frustratedly at her eyes, trying to stop the tears as she looked up. She looked past the concerned Avatar and earthbender, to the man who had stopped a few paces away.
Zuko looked hesitant to step forward, as if him doing so would send her spiraling into another episode. However, Katara couldn't describe the relief she felt seeing him safe in front of her. Her body had seemed to move on its own as she slid forward and tried to stand.
Her legs wobbled beneath her and Aang quickly helped steady her. "Not so fast, Sweetness!" Toph had insisted with a frown. "You just woke up. You're not all there, yet!"
Katara had paid them no mind. She looked towards black-haired man. "Zuko," she choked out. He couldn't look at her. He refused to. His eyes had been turned away, but she could see his face flushed and a few remaining streaks from tears across his face. "Zuko, are-"
"I'm sorry," he said quickly as he shut his eyes and tightened his hands into fists at his sides. "I'm sorry for going into the forest."
She had shaken her head. It wasn't his fault. She knew it wasn't his fault. "No, I-"
Zuko had stepped back. "We should get back to the inn, especially Katara," he said as he seemed to walk around them purposefully. "She needs to rest."
"Zuko!" Katara shouted, stopping him in his tracks. She still looked unsteady and was propped up by Aang. She looked at him beseechingly. "Are you okay?" she stressed as she looked at his back.
His shoulders rose and fell with a heavy breath. "I can't see the dead, like you can," he had told her solemnly. "I don't know what you saw, so yes," he swallowed. "I'm alright."
He had tried his best to avoid her after that and give her time to rest. Aang had encouraged him to speak to her after a day and he had dropped by her room with some skewered octopus balls, but she was asleep. He left a note saying he hoped she was better and then left.
Since then, all the numerous topics they discussed before that fateful night seemed to disappear and uncomfortable silence replaced it. They'd be stuck with each other for another long flight soon and part of him was glad that she called for him to wait. Perhaps they could clear the air.
"The main village at the Southern Water Tribe," Katara seemed to stress. "Not the Northern one."
"Yes, I know," the postmaster sighed as he stamped her small packet. "Anything else?"
"No," Katara said as she handed him some coins. Once they were counted, he gave her a nod and Katara turned around.
Zuko waited for her to reach him before he straightened up and followed her outside. "Letter to your parents?"
"And my grandparents and my brother," Katara replied. "To yours?"
"To my uncle," Zuko answered. He adjusted the small leather sack slung across his back. "Are you heading to the meeting place?"
"Are you?" Katara asked. "Aang and Toph were still getting the last packages together when I left the inn."
He hesitated. "I was going back to the forest." He waited for her to respond with a frown or tell him not to go.
"The forest?" she asked, her voice quieter. He slowed in front of a small store and looked at her.
"I just want to pay my respects to the dead," he admitted as he moved closer to the store's doorway. "My mother used to take us to the temple to light incense and-"
"I get it," Katara acknowledged. He watched her hands grasp the sides of her tunic and let out a small breath.
"It won't be long," Zuko assured her as he entered the store. "I'll meet you with the others." He gave a nod to the shop keep as he made his way to a shelf with rows in incense sticks in boxes. As he picked a few, he heard shuffling behind him.
"I'll go with you," Katara told him. He immediately shook his head.
"It's alright, Katara. You don't need to push yourself," he said as he headed to the counter. He placed the items on the surface and dug out his money pouch.
"No, I want to come." A brown hand rested on his forearm and he paused, coins still in his hands. His eyes lingered on her hand before rising and looking at her unsurely.
"Are you sure?" he asked. She withdrew her hand from his arm and he handed the payment to the shopkeep before gathering the few sticks in his hands. Beside him, Katara nodded.
"You heard what Aang said. The spirits are at rest now." She would be fine was what she was trying to say. Regardless, the memory of her unconscious, the images of her screaming and crying were still fresh in his mind and Zuko hesitated. The waterbender forced a smile on her face. "Please, Zuko."
He took a reluctant breath. "You can do what you want," he muttered concedingly before shoving the incense into his bag and turning away from her. Katara looked relieved and followed him outside the store.
Silence settled over them once more. Katara kept her eyes down, trying to find something to say to the Firebender. Something that didn't revolve around them falling off a cliff and nearly dying. Beside her, Zuko looked ahead of them. He couldn't quell his concern. What if Aang was wrong? What if there were still spirits lingering? If so, did they pose a threat to Katara?
He didn't realize he had quickened his pace and was now walking ahead of her, as if ready to scout ahead before she arrived.
"Zuko," Katara called out, frowning as she quickened her own walk to catch up. "We have some time. There isn't a need to rush."
He didn't mean to. He was just worried. Honestly, how could he not be? He slowed down and took a deep breath. "Sorry," he mumbled as she reached him.
"It's alright," Katara replied softly as she stopped beside him and looked towards the forest they were about to enter. Despite Aang's assurance that the angry spirits were at peace, she still felt nervous. Her hands clenched at her sides and she bit her lower lip. There was nothing to be afraid of, she told herself. They would be fine now.
Zuko could almost read her thoughts on her face and silently berated himself. He knew the situation, yet still told her what he was going to do.
"Katara-"
"I'm not scared," she asserted, her eyes still fixed on the tree line. She narrowed them and seemed to straighten her back.
"I didn't say you were," he said as Katara marched forward ahead of him. "Katara, wait," he frowned as he moved forward and reached for her wrist.
She felt his fingers close around her and she turned around, giving him a confused look. "Zuko, I told you. I'm not scared."
"That doesn't matter," the scarred firebender frowned. "I still need to - want to apologize."
Her brows immediately knit together, confused. "What for?" His eyes crinkled. Before he could explain, she shook her head and reached for his hand. She pried his fingers off her wrist before grasping his hands in hers and giving them a firm squeeze. "It wasn't your fault you went into the forest. I can see the dead, remember?" Katara reminded him as she met his eyes beseechingly. "I can see them and I know more than most what they are capable of." Zuko lowered his head, unwilling to accept that reason. When he avoided her eyes she squeezed his hands once more. "It's not your fault," she told him firmly. "I don't know what you saw that led you to that cliff, but whatever it was wasn't your fault."
"That doesn't change what happened," Zuko said as he finally lifted his head and met her eyes. "It was one thing for me to put myself in danger, but because I let myself fall into a trap and be led away, you nearly died, too," he reminded her bitterly. "And even if you didn't, that won't erase what you saw and what you felt. That won't change what I got you into." He shook his head and pulled his hands away from hers. "You didn't need to see all of that and I'm sorry." He stepped away from her. "I'm so sorry, Katara."
Her eyes moistened. She bit her lower lip once more. "I would've seen them, Zuko...with or without you there," she told him, defeated. "I will always see more things than I am willing to."
"But that doesn't mean we should willingly expose you to them."
"You weren't yourself," Katara stressed once more. "Something was pulling you down - they were pulling you down! They lured you to the forest and that cliff!"
Zuko held his breath. He grit his teeth and clenched his fists at his side. "They didn't do it alone." He turned and quickly swept past her. "I supplied all the fuel they needed."
The waterbender looked confused as she watched Zuko enter the forest. Part of him hoped that she wouldn't follow, but he found himself relieved when he heard her footsteps behind him.
"Zuko-"
"I was following my sister," he revealed without turning back. "I knew something was wrong. I hadn't seen her since I left several years ago. She's an adult now, but that night, she still sounded like the child I remember her to be."
Katara looked concerned as she easily caught up with him. "Did something happen to her?"
"My sister? No, she's fine. She's safe," he told her, though sounded as if he were trying to convince himself. "I was following her, but who I found was my mother."
The Water Tribe woman nearly came to a stop. She drew her head up and watched his fleeting back as she remembered his first request of her. His mother had died and he was sure it was a murder.
"She died in a fire," Zuko explained. "I saw her and...and I tried to save her. I still remember her last words to me, Katara. She told me to get away. To run so that the fire wouldn't consume me, too. The dead showed me something else. That night, my mother was trying to bring me with her."
Katara's eyes widened. Her heart ached at the thought as she watched Zuko stop by the side of the path. She didn't know the dead could do that. It was cruel and a part of her couldn't help but resent the spirits for twisting an already terrible memory.
"We can light the incense here," Zuko said as he cleared a little space by the side of the path and placed a near-by rock in front of him for the sticks to lean on. He gently pinched the top of the incense sticks and upon releasing the, thin streams of smoke coiled into the air. As he placed them carefully against the rock and bowed his head, Katara knelt down beside him.
"Zuko..."
"Don't think that any of this happened because of you," he told her firmly as he closed his eyes and bowed his head. "I was at the wrong place at the wrong time. Whether I was coming here alone or with the others, I would've been targeted no matter what. While I wish you hadn't been, I am grateful that you're with me. If you weren't, I would've blindly stepped off the cliff and Aang would've never had a chance to intervene."
She lowered her head and closed her eyes before she bowed. "I'm grateful you're with me, too," she said quietly. A warm hand rested over his. "I couldn't handle it alone. Thank you."
His fingers wove between hers as they remained seated beside each other, silently accepting the comfort. Zuko rarely heard those words spoken to him and for a man who had spent so much time alone, it was reassuring to know that there was at least one person who was glad he existed and even welcomed it.
For Katara, the support system around her had always tried to find a way to seal her vision as the answer to her problems. However, Zuko was the one who most encouraged her to accept it and stood by her as a means of support. That was a different answer to the problem. One that didn't make the problem one at all. It was going to be a long, tiring journey, but it was one she was more prepared for now.
The banished prince closed his eyes and took a deep breath. After what she had done for him, he at least owed her the truth on his background.
"The angry spirits didn't just attack me because I was from the Fire Nation," he told her. He knew why they had targeted him. "My great-grandfather-"
"There they are!" a voice pierced the air around them and Katara immediately turned her head away from Zuko and towards the sound of the voice. Toph was running towards them. "What's taking you guys so long...oh..." The black-haired young woman grinned lopsidedly as she slowed to a stop a few paces behind them. "Am I interrupting something?" she asked knowingly.
For a moment, Katara wondered what she was talking about. It was only when Zuko finally pulled his hand from hers that she was reminded that they had been clasped together. The older man rolled his eyes and began pushing himself up.
"We were paying our respects to the dead," he told Toph.
She wrinkled her nose. "After what happened? Didn't they try to kill you two?"
"Not all of them wanted to kill us, Toph," Katara said as Zuko offered his hand and helped her to her feet. "In the end, they all just wanted closure and to leave this world."
The earthbender looked skeptical, but shrugged. "I guess," she said. She raised her arms in the air and shouted. "Aang! Aang, bring Appa down! I found them!"
The two older benders tilted their heads back and could make out the large white beast circling above them, through the tops of the trees.
"There isn't enough space! Meet us where we arrived!" Aang shouted before turning Appa's reins to the side.
"You heard the Avatar," Toph said as she began to jog past them. "Let's go! I need to get back to my school!"
"How far is it from here, anyway?" Zuko began to ask as he followed behind her. He made it one step before he felt his hand, still clasping Katara's, held back. He looked over his shoulder and saw the waterbender staring past the old foundation remnants. His eyes narrowed as he followed her gaze. There was nothing but overgrown bush. "Katara," he called, shaking her hand in his. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," she said softly. He watched her eyes crinkle. "I just see them."
His eyes widened and he released her hand. He moved back to her, stepping in front of her and ready to shield her eyes once more. "Where?" he asked as his lips tightened into a line.
Katara glanced at him and smiled slightly. She raised her arm and placed a hand on his, gently moving him back. "They are not malicious." Her eyes moved back to the vacant plot of land. "But I wonder who they are bowing to. You or me?"
He looked from her to the field and back. His shoulders relaxed. He placed a hand on her shoulder. "To you." She looked confused as she turned to him. "You heard their cries. You saw them and helped get them closure."
"No, Aang did," Katara insisted. "I just happened to be there when he did." She lowered her head and bowed back to the fading spirits before she turned and headed up the path Toph had run.
Zuko followed behind her, reaching the edge of the forest and the awaiting sky bison as Toph shouted for them to hurry up from the saddle.
"Everything okay, Zuko?" Aang asked, smiling from where he sat above Appa's head.
"Looks like it," Zuko replied as he followed Katara up Appa's tail and into the saddle.
Aang looked over his shoulder, making sure they were securely on the sky bison. When he was sure they were seated safely, he grasped the reins. "Appa! Yip, yip!"
They rose into the sky with a jerk and Toph snorted. "I'll never get used to that." Katara chuckled as settled back against the saddle. Beside her, Zuko, yawned and crossed his arms over his chest. His bag rested against him as he leaned back.
"Tired?" the waterbender asked. His eyes were already closed.
"It's been a long last few days," he mumbled. As he drifted off, Katara rummaged through some of her things to find a blanket. Carefully, she placed it over his sleeping figure, though she could've sworn she heard him mumble a thanks.
The man began to breathe evenly and Katara tried to settle into her own nap. She could hear Aang and Toph at the front of the saddle, talking about metal bending techniques. Their voices turned into a calming drone, lulling her to sleep.
She was almost out when a heavy body slid against hers. She opened one eye and found Zuko slumped against her shoulder, still blissfully asleep. She chuckled slightly and leaned back into him.
Despite what he had said, that he was the target, he hadn't run away. He had remained beside her, even offered himself to assailants he couldn't see for her sake. When they fell, he had grabbed her and twisted his body around her. The one who would've slammed into the rocks below and taken the brunt of the damage would've been him.
"Katara, did you send that letter to your family?" she vaguely heard Aang ask.
"Yes," she mumbled as she closed her eyes. She felt a blanket being swept over her. "I hope they get it soon. I have so much to tell them."
He tossed his heavy, worn bag aside as he let out a heavy, tired breath. The hunt had been exhausting, but worth it. He couldn't wait until the seal jerky was ready.
"I'm back!" the Water Tribe warrior shouted into the large ice, stone, and wooden home lined with furs. "Mom! Dad!?" he called out as he began to tug off his heavy outer coat. He pulled it over his head and looked around the empty main room with the fire pit in the center. "Gran-Gran? Grandfather?"
"Sokka, is that you?" a voice asked from one of the back rooms. He heard shuffling and turned to see his middle-aged mother peeking from one of the furs that hung over the hall. "Welcome home! How as the hunt?"
"Good. Torak is going to bring over some seal jerky when it's ready," he reported. "Where's Dad and them?"
"They're still at that council meeting," Kya replied with an exasperated sigh. "They've been there all day and the food is getting cold."
Her oldest child grinned from ear to ear. "Don't worry, Mom. I'll help you with that," he assured her. Kya snorted and shook her head.
"You'll wait for your father and grandparents to get back first, young man," she scolded him lightly. "Else, there won't be any dinner for anyone in this family."
Sokka's eyes widened. That reminded him. "Speaking family," he said as he knelt down beside his bag and began digging through. "One of the ships from the Earth Kingdom brought us some mail." He lifted up a neatly wrapped packet and Kya stepped out into the main room, curious. "It looks like it's from Katara."
"From the Earth Kingdom?" Kya frowned as she extended her hand to receive the packet. "What she is doing there? I thought she had gone to see the Avatar at one of the temples."
Sokka shrugged as he opened the packet. He found several letters within and weeded through them until he found one addressed to him. He handed the rest to his mother and began to unfold his sister's letter. "Maybe's she's on an adventure," he chuckled. "If I had known she was in the Earth Kingdom, I would've had her send me back some-"
"She's going to the Northern Water Tribe!" the woman gasped as she read her daughter's letter address to her and her husband. "With the Avatar!"
Sokka jerked his head back surprised. "What?"
His mother paid him no mind as she slowly took a seat on one of the cushions surrounding the fire pit. "Oh, no...," she whispered as she lowered the letter in her hand. She lifted her head and looked at her son. "Katara's hasn't heard yet."
Her son frowned. "Heard what?"
Kya's eyes saddened. "About Yue's engagement." Sokka felt his chest tighten at the name. His hand tightened around the letter.
"It's fine, Mom," Sokka said in a low voice. The wound was still fresh. "Katara will understand."
His mother looked at him with a heartbreaking expression. "Sokka..."
"Have some faith in Katara," Sokka smiled weakly. "She is the Southern Water Tribe's Chief's daughter. She'll understand why the princess chose someone else over me."
A Note From the Author
Thank you for your time and patience. I have been extremely busy as of late and have been unable to set aside time to properly write. I had to make do with writing a sentence here and there. I am very thankful for the kind and positive responses that I've received from the readers. They are very encouraging and I hope I do not let you all down.
I found this chapter a bit confusing, so if you have any questions, please let me know. I will be bringing in Sokka soon, though not for another chapter or two. The current group is heading towards the Northern Water Tribe, but without Toph, as they're dropping her off. Thank you again for reading!