"Sitcom Royal Rumble"
Rated T for mild language and violence
Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with World Wrestling Entertainment, Total Nonstop Action, or sitcoms associated with ABC, NBC, CBS, FOX, Disney, Nickelodeon or TBS. Anyway, I'd figured I'd do this for fun and amusement. So enjoy!
Chapter 4: Eat Sleep Hardcore Repeat
As George tried to get Martin and Sheldon out of the rumble, the clock winded down to the next entrant.
10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... *BZZT!*
Entrant #6: Eric Forman (That 70's Show)
As the bell sounded for the sixth time, a teenager with brown hair, a green t-shirt and brown bell bottoms came through the curtain and came running down the aisle.
JBL: Just perfect. They just had to put the wimp in.
Jerry Lawler: He's no wimp, JBL. It's Eric Forman from "That 70's Show"!
Michael Cole: Perhaps the youngest son of the Forman bunch. Well see if he's got what it takes to last long.
As soon as Eric entered the ring, he saw George trying to pull off a double elimination.
Seeing this as an opportunity, Eric went into a three-point stance, eyeing down George like a plate of chimichangas.
Jerry Lawler: What does Eric have in mind?
JBL: *cringing* Is he gonna take a crap in the ring? I don't wanna see that!
Just like that, Eric took off, raised his foot high in the air...
...
...and lowblowed George right in the johnson, making him squeal in pain!
Michael Cole: *cringing* Oh my god!
JBL: *feeling delighted* A-Ha! I like that! Nice move from Eric Forman! He isn't as wimpy as I thought he could be!
Jerry Lawler: Although I do admit that is a little dirty to begin with!
As George held his nuts in total pain, Eric mustered up surprising strength by lifting him up in a Samoan Drop position.
Holding on to him as long as he could, Eric performed an amazing airplane spin, spinning George Costanza around 1260 degrees!
Jerry Lawler: Hey, check this out!
JBL: How is someone the shape of a toothpick doing that!
Michael Cole: That's amazing!
JBL: I'm very certain Eric's taken steroids all of a sudden!
As Eric kept on spinning him, he had an idea in mind.
With George around his shoulders, he decided to knock down Martin, Sheldon and Urkel like dominoes. It was almost like George Costanza was a metal ladder all of a sudden and Eric decided to spin him around, knocking down everyone in sight. The crowd were on their feet for Eric Forman.
Jerry Lawler: Down does Martin!
JBL: And those two nerds as well! This Eric is something else!
Michael Cole: I wonder how long he's gonna spin him around for?
From Michael Cole's guess, Eric managed to spin George around for perhaps a good 45 seconds, which was perhaps long enough to introduce the next entrant into the Sitcom Royal Rumble.
Michael Cole: While Eric's still spinning Costanza around, let's take a look at who number 7 is!
10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... *BZZT!*
Entrant #7: Bob Duncan (Good Luck Charlie)
After the horn sounded for the 7th time, a middle-aged man with balding blonde hair and a shirt that read "Bob's Bugs-B-Gone", Bob Duncan ran down to the ring while giving out high-fives to the fans.
Jerry Lawler: Well, here's another hungry competitor.
Michael Cole: It's Bob Duncan from "Good Luck Charlie", and he's ready for a fight.
JBL: What happened to his hair? Looks like he lost some of his hair and grew some on his back!
As Lawler and Cole both ignored JBL's awkward comment, Bob saw Eric still spinning George around.
As the skinny teenager soon turned to Bob, the exterminator speared Eric, therefore knocking him and Costanza down!
JBL: Whoa, what a spear!
Jerry Lawler: Bob came out like a wrecking ball right there!
Bob was just getting started.
He noticed Steve Urkel and Sheldon Cooper having a test of strength. Bob saw this as an opportunity as he grabbed both contestants in the back of their heads. And just like a couple of football helmets on Monday Night Football, Bob slammed their heads together with a noggin knocker!
Jerry Lawler: OW! That's gotta hurt!
JBL: Yeah, that's just what I like to see! I'm glad he's sticking it to those nerds.
Michael Cole: *to JBL* You hate nerds?!
JBL: I always wanted to stuff them in lockers.
As Bob went to work on both Urkel and Sheldon, George Costanza felt dizzy because of the airplane spin that Eric Forman gave him. Apparently, he felt a bit sick to his stomach.
As Martin Payne grabbed Costanza by his collar, George did something so revolting that it forced fans and the entire commentators to cringe:
He ended up puking on him!
Michael Cole: *cringing* Oh my god!
JBL: Or dear, that is disgusting!
Jerry Lawler: He got it all over Martin!
JBL: You think? It was all Eric Forman's idea to spin him around.
Martin looked down at his shirt and felt revolted by the smell, like he was gonna throw up himself.
Eric Forman saw this and capitalized by grabbing the back of his shirt and throwing him over the top rope, down to the floor.
JBL: Well, there goes Martin!
Jerry Lawler: He won't be 'WHADDAP'-ing anytime soon! He's gone!
2nd Eliminated: Martin Payne; Eliminated by: Eric Forman; Duration: 3:42
After he got up, Martin tried to go back into the ring, but unfortunately for him, the referees held him back ignoring the vomit smell. With incomplete rage on his face, he stared up to Eric Forman.
Martin Payne: *to Eric* It ain't over, fool! I'm gonna git you back!
Jerry Lawler: Looks like he wants a grudge against Eric for eliminating him!
JBL: Oh waah waah on him, he got eliminated fair and square.
As the officials forced Martin to go back to the aisle and back to the locker room. The countdown clock appeared on the titantron, therefore indicating that the next entrant was about to enter on a count of 10.
JBL: We got number 8 coming! Who's it gonna be?
10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... *BZZT!*
Entrant #8: Mr. Leroy T. Brown (Meet The Browns)
As the horn sounded for the eighth time, a middle aged overweight black man with a gray goatee, suspenders and colorful orange slacks made his way down the aisle, while getting a tremendous ovation.
JBL on the other hand, wasn't happy to see him.
JBL: *whines* Oh no, this guy's in the Rumble?
Michael Cole: It's Mr. Brown from the TBS sitcom, Meet The Browns!
Jerry Lawler: That's definitely some unusual attire!
JBL: He definitely ripped Urkel off, I can tell!
Mr. Brown looked up at George, who was still nautious from all the vomiting.
Seeing this, he capitalized for an opportunity by trying to clothesline him over the ropes. But as soon as he got in the ring and charged at him, George lowered down the ropes, which sent Mr. Brown over the top rope and down to the floor! Everyone in the building laughed and cheered for his elimination just like that!
Jerry Lawler: WHAT?!
JBL: Ha ha, tough luck, Mr. Brown!
Michael Cole: He was in the ring for perhaps a second, and the next thing you know, he's out immediately!
3rd Eliminated: Mr. Leroy T. Brown; Eliminated by: George Costanza; Duration: 0:03
As Mr. Brown got up, he looked at George in total shock. He couldn't believe that he was eliminated this early in the match! After all, he was the only contestant who only lasted a second in the Rumble.
Reacting in shock, he looked to the sky as if he was talking to God.
Mr. Brown: *shouting to the sky* Why God? Why did ya make me lose! Was it because of the orange pants I wore?
JBL: Sorry Mr. Brown, but talking to the big man in the sky's not gonna do you good!
As he was still complaining at ringside, both Steve Urkel and Sheldon Cooper were fighting back against Bob Duncan by chopping him through the ropes in order to rough him up.
Michael Cole: Both Urkel and Sheldon ganging up against Bob now!
Jerry Lawler: Nice to see them team up here!
JBL: Yeah, but sooner or later, one of them's gonna turn against the other.
After Bob was roughed up a bit, both Urkel and Sheldon irish whipped him into the ropes, which forced Bob to collide with Eric Forman.
But strangely, as he was whipped onto Eric Forman, Bob hit the youngster with a Goldberg-like Spear! That resulted in a huge pop with the audience!
JBL: Spear! Spear!
Jerry Lawler: Down goes Eric Forman right there!
As Eric Forman was still recovering from the spear, George Costanza was trying to get back up from his feet after the excruciating Airplane Spin that he took from Eric.
Both Urkel and Sheldon looked at him and saw an opportunity. As he was still recovering on the ropes, the two managed to lift up Costanza's legs and sent him tumbling over the top rope and onto the floor in an instant elimination!
Michael Cole: Uh-oh, George is out!
Jerry Lawler: And eliminated by Sheldon and Urkel nonetheless!
JBL: C'mon, you gotta give credit to Eric Forman for spinning him around like a merry-go-round!
4th Eliminated: George Costanza; Eliminated by: Steve Urkel & Sheldon Cooper; Duration: 3:43
As the ring officials began checking on George, Steve Urkel and Sheldon Cooper took their focus on Bob Duncan...
...
...who ended up clotheslining the nerds over the top rope. Luckily, both Urkel and Sheldon remained on the apron, keeping them safe for now.
JBL: Whoa, we almost got double there!
Jerry Lawler: They were that close to being eliminated, though.
JBL: But seriously, I hope one of them gets outta there.
As the carnage continued, the Rumble clock lit up again, which meant that the 9th entrant was about to appear.
Michael Cole: We're about to see the ninth entrant. Who's it gonna be?
10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... *BZZT!*
Entrant #9: Beck Oliver (Victorious)
With the horn sounding for a ninth time, a teenager with shaggy black hair, leather jacket, blue shirt and denim pants rushed down to the ring while being greeted by a bunch of crazy L.A. fangirls.
Before he entered the ring, he looked under the apron searching for a weapon.
JBL: Oh, that's just great. We get another high-schooler...
Jerry Lawler: That ain't just any high schooler, that's Beck Oliver from Nickelodeon's "Victorious"!
Michael Cole: I think he's getting used to the hardware here!
After seconds of searching for a weapon, he brought out a trash can full of weapons.
As Bob Duncan tried to grab Beck's brilliant man-mane of hair, the high-school responded by sending a trash can straight to the exterminator!
Jerry Lawler: *surprised* Oh, hello!
Michael Cole: Bob definitely got exterminated there!
After Bob went down, Beck ascended up the top rope along with the trash can he got in his head.
He still took his focus on the exterminator himself. As Beck raised that trash can high in the air, he took off on flight. Luckily for Bob, he moved out of the way, which forced Eric Forman to take the hit himself instead!
Jerry Lawler: Oh my!
JBL: Eric Forman just got himself a new dent on his forehead!
Michael Cole: Bob was lucky to escape right there.
Seeing Eric down on the mat gave Sheldon and Urkel an idea.
The two nerds decided to drag Eric Forman over the top ropes in order to eliminate the skinny youngster. But knowing the smart geeky genius that he was, Eric managed to latch onto the ropes like a spider monkey!
JBL: Uh-oh, we could say goodbye to Eric Forman!
Jerry Lawler: I wouldn't say so JBL! Look at him hang on like that!
Michael Cole: Urkel and Sheldon doing the best they can to eliminate Eric Forman from this rumble.
However, Urkel and Sheldon wasn't alone in the elimination process. Both Beck and Bob all decided to join in try to eliminate Eric Forman from the match, making this a 4-on-1 encounter.
The people all went behind Eric Forman, who tried not to let his fingers slip. Just to receive the ounce of support, everyone in L.A. all chanted his name.
Crowd: *chanting* Eric! Eric! Eric! Eric!
Michael Cole: These people are getting behind Eric Forman!
JBL: It may not matter anyway, because Eric's about to go bye-bye!
After having about 30 seconds to push Eric off the apron, the strength from those four men were zapped away as they ended up worn out on the mat.
Getting his feet back on the apron, Eric managed to ascend to the top rope. In an insane move, Eric pulled off a cannonball senton, knocking down every contestant in the match like a dog pile!
Jerry Lawler: Ha ha, cannonbaaaaaaaall!
JBL: He knocked every one of them down like bowling pins!
Michael Cole: So far, we might have a new Rumble favorite!
As most of the competitors were trying to recover from Eric's cannonball, the Rumble clock lit up on the titantron again, indicating that a new entrant was about to enter in just about 12... 11...
10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... *BZZT!*
Entrant #10: A.C. Slater (Saved By The Bell)
After the horn sounded out for the 10th time, a teenager with a black jheri curl and decked out in a red Olympic-style uniform made his way out through the curtain.
JBL: Another one of these high-schoolers again? First we got Urkel, then Dez, then Beck and now we have this guy?!
Jerry Lawler: Here's another favorite from the 90's! It's Slater from "Saved By The Bell"!
Michael Cole: Very interesting to see how Slater will fare here!
As soon as he got in the ring, he dug in the garbage can for a steel chair.
With a chair in hand, he placed it around the head of Bob Duncan, and followed it by a flying leg drop!
Jerry Lawler: Yeouch! Leg drop on the steel chair!
JBL: He exterminated Bob Duncan on that move!
Slater's next target was the uber-nerd himself, Steve Urkel.
As the nerd was getting up, Slater grabbed him by the back of suspenders and muscled him up with a German Suplex.
Michael Cole: What a thunderous German Suplex by Slater!
Jerry Lawler: That might have sent Urkel's spine down a notch!
JBL: Hopefully that'll be enough to eliminate him!
After he took care of Urkel, Slater was approached by Beck Oliver, who tried to surprise him with a clothesline.
Using his smarts, Slater ducked under Beck and went behind him, connecting with a German Suplex! But yet, he still hung onto him!
JBL: Another German Suplex by Slater!
Michael Cole: Is he gonna attempt another one?
Jerry Lawler: He's like Brock Lesnar with a Michael Jackson jheri-curl!
With Beck around his arms, Slater dropped him again with another suplex.
But so far, Slater still wasn't done with him! Slater then transitioned into a dragon suplex, therefore dropping Beck yet again on the mat! The fans went crazy for Slater's impressive performance so far.
Michael Cole: Dragon suplex by Slater!
JBL: Is he gonna suplex him again?
Jerry Lawler: I think Slater's thinking about it!
But before Slater could drop him with another Dragon suplex, he got hit by a chair by Sheldon Cooper. That impact forced the momentum for Slater to die down completely.
Michael Cole: Unfortunately, Sheldon's not gonna allow that to happen!
JBL: That's not right. I wanted to see more from Slater.
Slater, however, was still holding on to Beck. This gave Sheldon an idea in his brain.
He emptied out the entire trash can full of weapons and stuffed both Beck and Slater inside the trash can. While being stuffed together, Sheldon went up the top rope, hoping that no one would make him tumble down to the floor.
Jerry Lawler: Oh man, this ain't gonna be good for Beck and Slater!
Michael Cole: What does Sheldon have in mind?
With a smirk on his face, Sheldon leaped up in the air and hit a missile dropkick on both men, knocking Slater and Beck on the mat.
Jerry Lawler: WHOA! Talking about killing two hunks with one nerdy stone!
JBL: I may not like him, but I wouldn't be lying and say that was the most impressive thing I've saw from that nerd!
It had already become carnage around the ring.
As both Slater and Beck lied down in pain and as Bob Duncan was at the ropes trying to eliminate Urkel, the countdown clock had lit up yet again, therefore leading the way to the next entrant!
JBL: Oh, here comes number 11! I can't wait!
To be continued...
Chapter 5's coming up next everyone! But before we close out this chapter, let's see what stats we have now!
Eliminated: Dez Wade, Martin Payne, Leroy T. Brown and George Costanza
Still in the ring: A.C, Slater, Beck Oliver, Bob Duncan, Eric Forman, Sheldon Cooper and Steve Urkel
Entrants in the ring: 6
Entrants still left to go: 40
Who's drawn number 11? Who will be on their way to a million dollars? And who's eaten my double fudge brownie? Either way, I don't know. But you'll soon find out next chapter. Feedbacks are appreciated! Stay tuned!