Hey Everyone! so here is chapter four! i really hope you guys like it! I really want to thank all of you that review it really means so much to me!

I also want to thank 713 for really helping me and encouraging me with this! She is super sweet!

Ellie woke with a start. She looked up at her aunt…no mothers face. That would take some getting used to. But isn't it what she always wanted. Elsie had always been her idol. When Elsie would come for that whole week, Ellie monopolized her time. She would even sneak over to her room at night and sleep cuddled up in Elsie's arms. It had always seemed right. It was like she was made to fit with her. She glanced up at her mother once again. In some ways she was glad she knew. She didn't have to deal with Moira's preference of the other children anymore, though she could hardly blame her. How do you love all children the same when they clearly are not. Her anger had subsided in her sleep. She was still hurt and she wanted to know why. But that wasn't important. Now she wanted a real mother daughter relationship with her real mother.

Elsie started to stir. She tightened her arms subconsciously around Elinor. Her eyes popped open; she risked a glance down only to find those beautiful brown eyes staring back at her. So many thoughts were running through her head when she heard the very sound she had wanted to hear for 19 years.

"Good morning Mama." The young girl said quietly. Elsie studied the girl's eyes. She saw no anger, only hurt, but what shown more than that was love.

Elsie's eyes welled up with tears as she held her daughter tightly in her arms. She felt her daughter cuddle into her side.

Elsie sighed, "Oh my little one, we should have told you so many years ago. I wasn't strong enough, and I couldn't bear you having the shame of an unwed mother. Please forgive me. I only did what I did out of love. You must understand that. I love you more than anything."

"Mama, you were already forgiven. Everything makes sense now that I think about everything. I was never Moira's favorite, and whenever you came to visit, you doted on me the most, and whenever I would sneak into your bed for a cuddle, things just felt right. I had always wished for you to be my mother. But mama I do have a question. Who is my father, and why didn't he marry you, or want me?"

Elsie told her everything, well she left out the steamy bits, and the part where Charles ignored her. When she finished, her daughter was staring into space.

"When are you going to tell him about me?" Elinor asked softly.
"Today. It is my half day and I always take them in the mornings, plus I was thinking about working all day anyway due to this party. I'll ask him to get some air with me. Would you mind terribly staying in here?" Elsie asked.
"No mama, I don't mind. Will I get to meet him today?" Ellie asked with a hope filled voice.
Elsie got up and started her morning routine and replied, "I don't know lass, I just don't know."

-C&E-

Elsie made her way down the stairs. Beryl met her at the bottom and whispered that she would have a tray taken up to the girl. It would be discreet. Elsie nodded her thanks and headed to her spot at the table. Charles had held breakfast until she had arrived. He motioned for them to sit and they went about as they normally do. He buttered her lightly toasted bread, she poured his tea and put the perfect amount of sugar and milk into it.

"Mr. Carson, would it be possible after luncheon if we could maybe get some air, together. There is something we must discuss." She said in what she hoped was a normal tone.
"I think that would be acceptable, Mrs. Hughes." He replied smiling all the while.
"Well I must get on. I have things to finish organizing for this party. I will meet to at the door after you are done." And with that she flitted out of the room.

When she reached her sitting room she let out a breath that she hadn't realized she had been holding. She then went to her desk to get the planning done. By lunch the plans were complete and the party looked as if it would come off without a hitch.

-C&E-

They met at the back door. He had a light coat on as did she.

"Shall we start then?" She asked with a smile. He opened the door and they walked in a companionable silence for a bit.

When they were a proper distance away from the ears of the house, he cleared his throat, and asked, "What is it you wanted to speak to me about?"

She looked up at him. He looked concerned and that made her stomach drop to her knees. How was she going to do this to him? With this information, it would upset the balance of not just her life but his and Ellie's lives as well.

She took a deep steadying breath. "Mr. Carson, do you remember that leave of absence I took about 19 years ago?"

"Yes, I believe your sister was quite ill. Mrs. Winters thought it likely she would die, and was surprised when you had nursed her back to health." He said. "I also remember the work falling below par because our head housemaid was missing," he finished with a smile.

"Mr. Carson….Charles, I didn't leave to go take care of my sister," she breathed out in a whisper.
"Elsie what are you taking about? Are you saying you lied to all of us? And why in the world would you just up and leave for six months? And without telling me might I add. Why must you bring this up now?" He rambled

She started to cry. He didn't know what to do. He hesitantly wrapped her up in his arms and rubbed her back. She pulled back out of his embrace, ashamed of the hurt she was about to cause him. She turned her back to him. The thoughts of how well they worked together and how she had accepted her unrequited love a long time ago flashed through her mind. But she was determined to see this through. He needed to know the truth. Her daughter needed a proper father.

"Charles, I left because…because," she stammered. "I left because I was pregnant, with your, our daughter."

"MY WHAT?" He yelled. The anger and hurt in his voice made her whip around. She had been hurt too, when he ignored her after that fateful night during that damn storm. She was angry and hurt too. So she yelled back at him, the whole story.

"That night in the barn we made a beautiful baby girl. I couldn't tell you because you had become so distant after word. What was I to do, get an abortion? I don't think I could have handled that. So I went to my sister in Argyle and stayed to have the baby. Her name is Elinor Kathleen. I left her with my sister, so I could come back to work. I sent money to them each month, so they could afford to take care of her, and I went to visit, and the girl only knew me until now as Auntie Elsie. She came here because she found out that I really am her mother."

When she was finished she collapsed to the ground with her face in her hands. She loved the blasted man. She was sure that if she looked up she would see disapproval and hurt and anger. So she knew not to look at the man.

"Why didn't you tell me Elsie?" Charles breathed out. "I would have done the right thing."
"I didn't tell you because I wanted you to want me out of love, not obligation. I would have been a burden, you would have been shamed out of your position as butler." She cried out to him. "Charles you cut me off, after that night we had little to no communication. Why didn't you love me, why didn't you want to speak with me? You completely ignored me, Charles, why?" She wanted the answer to the questions that had burdened her mind for the last 19 years.

The question and the her voice pleaded with him caught him off guard. How do you tell the woman you love that you have loved them all along without breaking the standard rules. This made him fluster. Men were not supposed to bare their souls to other people.

"Elsie, I know that I hurt you with my actions during that time..." He paused at a loss for words. He sighed. Maybe he should just say it. He still doesn't know exactly how she feels, he doesn't understand her, and he never has. He just knows that he is hopelessly in love with her. Then his anger flared again. She didn't tell him they had a daughter. She was his best friend, and she just happened to leave this important detail of their relationship out. He thought of all the things that could have been and it made him angry at her, and the circumstances. Why didn't she understand that he would have given his whole life in service up to have a family with her.

His anger won over the remorse. He angrily lashed out, "It still didn't give you the right to lie to me all these years. Elsie I trusted you. You didn't tell me I had a daughter, and then you belittle the way I cling to Mary as if she were my own. At least I got to watch her grow up. I don't know the first thing about the girl you are thrusting into my life. How do I know she is even mine?"

As soon as the words left his mouth he knew it to be a mistake. In what seemed like a second she was on her feet. He felt the sting of her slap, and knew he had crossed the line that may never be able to be fixed.

"How DARE you accuse me of being a loose woman, Charles Carson. The only man who I have ever loved has been you. You arrogant bastard. If you took one look at her then you would know she is yours." And with that she turned, she felt his hand land on her arm but she ripped out of his grasp and ran back to the house. She fled into her sitting room and slammed the door. The resounding sound of the lock clicking into place was an echo of finality. Beryl could hear the woman sobbing. There was no way to get in. She was afraid for Elsie as she heard something break.

"Elsie," she said softly, "let me in." When she got no reply she went to fetch the only person who could bring her out.

"Elinor you have to come down here. It is your mother." Elinor flew past Mrs. Patmore and down the stairs. Charles had his head on the door apologizing softly. He looked up and saw what looked like a young Elsie, the only difference were the eyes. They were his eyes, he realized now that he had made a grave mistake.

"You must be Elinor." He said flatly… one would never know by the tone of his voice that his heart was filling with love for his daughter and overflowing with love for the woman he had hurt so very much.

"Yes, and just who are you?" She asked smartly.

Hesitating, he replied, "I am your father."

Okay so there it is! tell me what you thought! reviews are love!

Samantha=)