"Stop looking at me like that."
You say agitated because you're trying to focus on the delicious genius that is the corn dog and Warren is sitting across from you at one of the many tiny square tables that fill the mall food court, with that damned smirk.
"Like what?" He questions stealing some of your fries and you glare at him because he knows that you don't share food. Ever.
"Like you've seen me naked." You hiss and Warren laughs loud and bright and the people at the table beside you guys turn to look.
"But I have seen you naked and it was awesome." He grins stealing another fry and you roll your eyes. "You've got nothing to be ashamed of."
"I'm not ashamed." You clarify dipping your corndog in the perfect ratio of mustard and ketchup on your paper plate. "I just don't want you to get the wrong idea about last night."
"Don't worry, I know what last night was." Warren says, his smile softening while he watches you swirl your corndog in the ketchup and mustard. "And if using my body made you feel better than I'm more than happy to have helped. After all what are friends for?"
You smile at him around a bite of corndog. "And while I appreciate your giving nature." You start and Warren beams at you. "Its not going to happen again."
"You say that now but who knows when your gonna need some of this lovin' again." Warren says and you grin at him, pointing your corndog at him and he leans across the small square table and takes a bite because Warren's freaking awesome and the least you can do is share food with him. "So speaking of lovin'…"
"Nice transition." You sigh and he nods.
"Thank you." He answers quickly, "What're you gonna do with your whole Carly situation?"
That's a good question but you don't have the answer to it so you shrug, eating a couple of fries. "I don't know. What do you think I should do?"
Warren looks at you thoughtfully, "I know you love Carly but you can do better than being her dirty little secret."
"But I don't care, I'll be her whatever as long as I'm hers." You confess and because it's the truth it also sounds pathetic and dumb like honest things tend to do when the pass your lips.
"That's some intense stuff." Warren comments, running a hand over his low cut hair. "You don't usually do intense stuff."
"I know that's why its killing me." You sigh and you're not very hungry anymore which is the number one sign that you have way too much on your mind and your entire being can't handle it. You push your fries towards Warren who takes them without missing a beat.
"What do you want, Sam? Tell me." he says mid chew and you frown, scratching your eyebrow.
"I want Carly." And your answer seems so simple but you know that even if your goal is uncomplicated, the route to reaching it isn't. "And I want you to stop looking at me like you can see through my clothes."
Warren gives you that lewd smirk again. "I don't have to see through your clothes. All I have to do is close my eyes and I can see naked Sam." Warren makes a show of closing his eyes, leaning back in his chair and lacing his hands behind his head. "Hi, naked Sam. Don't you look good naked. Oh, what's that? What're you doing with that chocolate syrup? Oh, you're so naughty naked Sam."
You gaze at him until he opens one eye with that damned grin and you can't help but smile back.
"I love you, Dub-dub." You sigh seriously and he opens his other eye.
"I love you too." He answers without hesitation. "And now you're gonna try and kick my ass aren't you."
"Oh yeah, definitely. I'll give you a 5 second head start. One…" You laugh as Warren darts out of his chair before giving chase.
You take the a day off of school to work a double shift because living on your own means you have rent and bills and crap and even though Warren's parents are nice enough to help you out, you still need cash and ever since Warren had insisted that you needed hot water and heat and stuff despite your insistence that you don't need luxuries like that so you need some money for that bill too.
It's dark when you finish for the day, Warren's mom telling you to leave because you look tired and she doesn't want you to get sick and if you break one more plate she's gonna take it out of your check.
You zip up your sweater over your uniform, flipping up your hood because the cold is biting against your ears and you're nearly to your beat up old jeep when you see Carly there, leaning against your dented up door under the dirty light of a parking lamp.
You blow out a breath that immediately condenses into white steam in the cold air. You want to know what the hell she's doing here, how she got here, how long has she been waiting for you but all that comes out is her name.
Her hands are tucked in her jacket and her cheeks are pink from the cold and she's beautiful but your tired and not just from today because you can't close your eyes without thinking about her so you're not really sleeping and instead you stay up watching infomercials for the ShamWow because your brain wont shut off.
"Take me to your place."
You should probably argue, tell her that she should just go home, go to her girlfriend, to get out of your face because you're worn-out and confused and Carly being physically in front of you but absolutely off limits isn't going to help with that.
But you don't, you lean past her to unlock your door, muttering "Get in." before walking around the front and getting in too.
You guys don't talk on the ride and aside from the rattling of your jank heater as it blows warm air over it, there's no noise, just airlessness.
Carly follows you up the three floors to your apartment and you can feel her staring at you patiently while you jiggle your key in the door before trailing you in to your apartment with your too nice furniture that you got from Warren's family and the odds and ends that are distinctly your own.
"Sam." Carly starts, her hand reaching out to catch yours while you walk into the living room and you immediately shrug out of her touch, not because you don't want to touch her but because touching her does things to your body and you can't handle that right now.
"I'm gonna go grab a shower then we can talk, okay?" You offer and Carly nods.
"Okay." She breathes, "Scrub it up."
It's a relief to shut yourself into the room then the bathroom and be able to stand under the scorching spray of water that is reddening your skin because you can focus on that instead of the gorgeous, bewildering girl in your living room.
You're a power cleaner, you only need 10minutes to be presentably clean but tonight you take 20 to try and burn everything off but when you step out and into your tee shirt and shorts you still feel so heavy, even as you trudge back into the living room where Carly is sitting on the couch listening to the excited guy in the headset talking about the ShamWow.
"I really need one of those." You whisper moving around the couch to sit at the other side, as far away as possible without actually sitting on the floor.
"Yeah, Spencer's already ordered it twice." Carly whispers looking at you but you keep your eyes on the dancing television screen.
"Smart man." You murmur, leaning over into the arm of the couch and you feel Carly's eyes on you long after you would've expected her to turn away. You glance at her, meeting her eyes and you know it's a mistake because now you can't look away.
"Sam," Carly croaks. "I'm sorry."
"For what?" You breathe and Carly shrugs a little bit.
"I know what I'm doing…the way I'm acting is hurting you." She admits quietly and you shrug back.
"I guess I deserve it, though. I mean, I hurt you." You say, "You know, an eye for an eye and all that junk."
Carly frowns, eyebrows twisting up. "I'm not trying to punish you. This isn't about revenge. I'm just…"
"Confused?" You offer and Carly's blinks and squints like she's thinking.
"Scared." She says instead.
"I scare you?" You wonder and Carly licks her lips thoughtfully.
"I'm scared because all I ever think about is you, even when I'm with Ashley. I'm afraid that if we were to get back together, something would happen and we'd break up again-"
You sit up and twist your body towards her, folding one leg under you while the other foot stays on the floor. "That wouldn't happen."
"How do you know?"
"Because I'm older and less stupid and-and I love you." You blurt and Carly's eyes widen but your to exhausted to worry about the filter between your mouth and your brain.
Now you expect her to run, to ask you to drive her home and you're already trying to remember where the hell you stuck your keys when she speaks. "I never stopped loving you, Sam and that scares me too."
"I can see how that could be worrying." You exhale because you don't really know what else to say.
"And it makes me so mad, too." She exhales, rubbing her hand over her forehead. "Because you're not doing anything. Your just you and I'm just so…smitten."
You feel your mouth curl upwards slowly, "Smitten?"
"Yeah, pretty much." She laughs softly, eyes squinting and she's so pretty.
There must be something in the way you're gazing at her that makes her smile fade and hold on to the back of the couch while she edges closer to you until your legs are touching hers and she's looking at your mouth like she wants to kiss you.
Your hands fist against the cushions when she does kiss you, slow and tentative and close mouthed. Her lips are soft like always and when you pull back a little her teeth scrape over your bottom lip and shoots a sharp pull right through your body.
You run your tongue over the seam of her lips and she parts eagerly for you, letting you push your tongue into her mouth. She tastes vaguely minty and entirely familiar and you lean into her warmth, feeling her put her hands in your hair.
You slide your hand over her front, feeling the curve of her breast and hiking up her shirt in some places and you seriously consider ripping it off while your finger tugs at the collar of her shirt helplessly. But Carly most know what you're thinking or kinda like that shirt because she pulls back a little to whip her own shirt over her head and you watch it go while her dark hair falls over her shoulders.
Carly has the softest skin you've ever touched and you wonder if she does something special, like bathe in butter or something because what ever she does makes you never want to stop touching her and she doesn't seem to mind. She just gasps into your mouth while you touch her breast, her stomach.
Her hands are shaking when she eases you out of your clothes and then your naked and she's naked and you're shaking too when you touch her skin that's so soft .
Then you remember things, things you've never really forgotten, like that Carly Shay is definitely a top as she pins you under her on the couch while she kisses you. Tasting just like you remember, feeling better than you remember and you know given the chance you would willingly drown in Carly Shay.
You remember that she likes it when you suck on her tongue and makes the best noise in the back of her throat when you do it. Carly pulls away slightly and you follow her dumbly for a moment before stopping and opening your eyes to find her already looking at you with soft, heavy eye.
And, oh yeah, Carly likes boobs. You remember that too and you would've pegged Carly as a leg girl or maybe one of those girls that are all about personality but Carly is full of surprises as well as a love for boobs.
She dips her head to run her mouth over your chest and the sensation that shoots through you, settling low in your stomach, makes you groan and squeeze your eyes shut while you arch into the feeling.
"God," you exhale sharply, pushing up into her body and she moves back up to kiss you softly.
"Are you okay?" She rasps quietly and you swallow and smile.
"Not really." you admit and man, you're really really not and instead of helping Carly only makes it worse by pushing her hand between your thighs and you exhale tightly, winding your legs around her slim hips.
And this is different than before because you aren't new and eager and Carly knows what she's doing because there isn't any clumsy fumbling. Her touch is purposeful and gifted and has you burying your face in the soft, sweet part of her neck while you cry out into her skin.
There are sparks exploding in the back of your head in time with the thrust of Carly's slender fingers inside of you and everything is tight and slippery and so hard to focus on. But then she's pulling away and your trying to breathe while she arranges your legs together breathlessly, hooking one of your legs over her hip before straddling your other thigh and then it's a whole new, more intense feeling.
She cries your name softly and the way it sounds will stick in your brain for eternity. It makes you lean up and kiss her while she moves her hips and yours follow eagerly but soon even kissing is complicated and you and Carly are just breathing each others air.
"Car…God, Carly." You choke out her name while you come so hard that your brain just about shuts off. Your lungs burn because you cant get any oxygen and your body is straining so hard that it feels like any second that your ribs will break but it also feels fucking amazing.
When you open your eyes again Carly is staring at you, eyes dark and wide and still moving slick against you. You push up to kiss her, one arm propping you up while you reach down with your other hand to grip the back of her thigh while she thrusts against you and it only takes a moment before she's pulling away to press her lips to your shoulder and coming with a hoarse cry.
Your body is still shuddering weakly when you maneuver on to your side and effectively trap Carly between the back of the couch and your body but her eyes are shut and she's not really complaining.
"Are you alright, Cupcake?" You ask softly and Carly's eyes flutter open and she gives you a tired, close mouthed smile.
"I'm better than alright." She breathes while you slide your fingers along the sweaty skin cover her ribs, just under her breast.
"So what does all of this mean?" You question and Carly licks her lips thoughtfully.
"I'm not sure." She whispers, touching your hair and you don't know why but you sort of expected sex to change things but it was probably naïve to think that. "That we're in the same exact place."
"Yeah," You breathe closing your eyes. "Except more naked."
"This was probably a mistake." She utters even as she strokes a hand down your side.
"We seem to be prone to them lately." You agree, licking your lips and Carly smiles a little.
"…..so then I spit in your soda."
You catch the last of Warren's sentence and you choke on the mouthful of Peppy Cola your swallowing.
"What?!" You cry squinting down into your bottle and Warren shrugs and leans against the railing on the second floor of the mall as people pass beneath the two of you like ants.
"I didn't spit in your soda but I could've. You're totally not giving me the attention I need." Warren whines and you roll your eyes. " Carly can't be that good of a lay."
"Yeah she can." You say with a grin that's probably all perv while looking down at your Peppy Cola.
"Really?" Warren drags out the word curiously. "Tell me more about it."
"Shut up pervert." You sigh, taking another drink of your soda. "I'm sorry I zoned out on you."
"Well if your too busy thinking about sex to hang then I can go." He laughs and you punch him in the arm hard.
"I'm not thinking about sex. I'm thinking about Carly's girlfriend."
Warren chuckles, "Greedy." and you frown at him.
"We had sex and she has a girlfriend." You clarify and Warren leans over and steals your soda and you let him.
"You're the other woman." He says before bring the bottle to his mouth.
"I don't want to be the other woman. I want to be the woman." You clarify and Warren gives you a sympathetic look while he hands you back your soda.
"You need to talk to her, Sam, because I think an ultimatum is in order." He says around a burp and you frown.
"An ultimatum?" You breathe because Warren has been making way too much sense lately.
"You or Ashley." He says simply and you blink at him for a moment.
"Dub-dub…" You start but Warren cuts you off, tilting his head to look at you with serious grey eyes.
"Like it or not, you're special and you deserve to have someone who wants you and only you." He says earnestly and you smile warmly at him.
"Ya make me all tingly when you say nice things about me." You murmur and he leans over and nudges his shoulder against yours.
"I'm being serious." He laughs.
"And I'm being Sam." You reply dragging your hand over your eyes.
"And because you are Sam and you're my best friend let me be honest with you and say that I don't think this Carly thing is healthy."
Warren is right and you know it but you don't say that because his head is already huge and as hard as it is to admit that he's right its harder to actually say the words out loud because you're so in love.
"Also, imagine how Carly's girlfriend would feel if she found out." He says nonchalantly and you hadn't even thought about Carly's picture perfect girlfriend and her feelings and its partly because you suspect she's a robot and doesn't have actual feelings and mostly because that would make it worse than it already is.
"So you're parents are going out of town this weekend." You say clearing your throat and very obviously changing the subject and Warren throws you an amused look. "Are you throwing a party?"
"Hell yeah." Warren declares. "So lets get back to finding me a date."
"What about that girl?" You ask gesturing down at a girl in tight red jeans about to get on the escalator.
"No, she's old. She's like 30 or something." Warren says dismissively and you shrug.
"What about her?" You ask pointing to another girl and Warren gives you an exasperated sigh.
"Dude, I thought you would be better at this, ya know, since you're into chicks and everything." Warren says accusatorily and you stick your tongue out at him.
"Well what kind of girl are you looking for?" You ask finishing your soda.
"Ya know, one that's…" Warren does a lewd juggling gesture in front of his chest. "…smart." he finishes and you grin and shake your head. "Like her." He says pointing to a blonde.
You cap your soda and push away from the railing easily. "Dub-dub, that's a dude."
"Sam, right?"
You glance up from the history book your furiously studying because you heard there was a pop quiz next period, and look right into Ashley's perfectly made up face.
"Yeah, uhm, how goes it?" You ask awkwardly and squinting up at her from the metal table your sitting at outside.
"Oh, I'm fine." She says and you can't help but notice the way her blonde hair catches the sunlight and you're suddenly very self-conscious about your brackish blonde hair. "Do you mind if I sit for a moment?"
"Yeah, sure. What's up?" You ask as she slides demurely into the table.
"You and Carly are friends, right?" She sort of blurts and you blink at her stupidly for a second that she instantly feels with words. "Like she told me that you were her first girlfriend and everything and I know that when you broke up you had a falling out but, I mean, you're friends now right?"
She talks a lot and you can't see how Carly deals with it because you're already exhausted. "Something like that." You mutter as guilt washes over you in great waves and makes you instantly nauseous.
"Well, have you noticed she's been acting weird lately? Not weird, creepy, but like weird different."
You wonder if she means weird, like, two-timing weird.
"No. No, not really." You choke out, suddenly dizzy and you breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth in a desperate attempt to not vomit.
"I know this is kind of strange and that you don't really know me and I don't really know you but could you, maybe, talk to her for me? Just make sure she's okay because she's been acting so peculiar lately…" She trails off watching you with bright blue eyes.
"Yeah." You croak, "Sure. I'll-I'll talk to her." You manage, your stomach twisting itself into knots and Ashley gives you a dazzling smile.
"Thanks. Thank you so much." She breathes in relief, pushing herself up. "I guess, I'll just let you get back to studying then."
You nod once, "Okay." watching her go before dropping your head onto your open book.
You're so going to hell.