A/N - Thanks so much to everyone who read & reviewed. I love you all! I outlined the rest of the story, and figured out that it's going to be about 15 chapters, give or take a few. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy the next chapter. For some reason, every time I upload this chapter, it deletes some words. And it's not even in the same section, it seems to just randomly pick and choose words to delete. Very odd. I think I found & fixed most of them, but if I didn't get them all, just let me know & I'm sorry in advance about any confusion it might cause. Also, I know you guys are all wondering what's going on with Julian. Don't worry, you'll figure it out very soon! And for those of you wondering, Brulian is only a couple of chapters away! =) Please read & review. Thanks =)

Disclaimer: I do not own OTH, nor am I in any way affiliated with any of the stars from the show :]

Chapter Three

October 19,2005

"How is she doing?" Brooke asked early Monday morning. She was sitting at one of the tables right outside of school with Haley, waiting for everyone else to join them.

"I talked to her yesterday afternoon for a few minutes. She said she's ok. But she hasn't spoken to him since Friday. I don't know if she's tried or if he's tried. I didn't ask. And she really wasn't telling. That was the only time I talked to her all weekend." Haley explained, taking a sip of her orange juice.

Brooke nodded. She'd barely heard from Peyton this weekend either, and it was killing her. She wanted to be there for her friend so bad, she hated when any one of her friends were hurting. But she knew how Peyton was, she liked to go through things alone.

"Well I wouldn't blame her for not trying to talk to him. He embarassed her! He embarassed all of us, for that matter. I wouldn't talk to him either if I were her." Brooke shook her head, annoyed. Everytime she thought of what happened on Friday, she got mad all over again.

"But you aren't her, Tigger. And I'm pretty sure that if you got into something like that with Lucas, you'd want to talk to him. Especially after having no contact for an entire weekend." Haley pointed out.

Brooke shrugged. She knew she was right, but she was still angry for her friend. "Maybe. But that doesn't excuse how much of a jerk he was. And Lucas isn't an idiot. Well.. sometimes he is, but that's beside the point. He knows better then that. He wouldn't get drunk at a club that we all go to. Often. At a club that two of our friends mothers own! How stupid can he be?"

"Very."

The girls looked up as Nathan and Lucas walked up to the table and took a seat across from them.

"Lucas. You're going to have to let it go sooner or later."

"Hales, he got drunk at my mom's club. He yelled at Peyton and made an ass out of himself. Why do I have to let it go? He's a jerk. Plain and simple." He shook his head. The only thing Julian had done this weekend was make Lucas hate him even more.

She was about to point out that the grudge Lucas held against Julian had nothing to do with this past weekend, but she decided against it. There was no use making Lucas angry at her. That would only make matters worse.

Nathan sighed. "There's something going on, guys. I tried calling him all weekend. Nothing. He wouldn't answer any of my calls. I think he even turned his phone off yesterday."

They all sat quietly, unsure of what more to say. They were so lost in their own thoughts that none of them heard Peyton approach until she sat next to Brooke.

"Hey guys."

Everyone looked over at her hesitantly, ready for the worst. However, they were pleasantly surprised to see her smiling at them.

"Hey Peyt!" Brooke smiled brightly at her friend, glad to see her in such a good mood. She wasn't sure why Peyton was smiling, but she wasn't about to complain. She'd been worrying all night that Peyton wouldn't show up to school that morning, but she was glad to be proven wrong.

"You guys are here early." She observed, directing the comment toward Nathan and Lucas. She was right. The guys normally got there just two minutes before the first bell rang in the morning.

They both shrugged. Neither one of them wanted to say anything, afraid to ruin Peyton's mood.

Peyton looked around at everyone. She could tell they were trying not to upset her. When she'd woken up this morning she'd decided to go about her day as normally as possible. But now, she realized, it was going to be impossible if everyone wasn't going to act the same. She knew they wanted to know what was going on. She could practically see the questions dancing around in their eyes, but had no answers for them. She also wanted to know what was going on.

All weekend, she'd stayed in her room, listening to music and working on her sketches. Everytime she spoke to someone, she barely stayed on the phone for more then 5 minutes. She made a couple of attempts to speak to Julian but he hadn't returned any of her phone calls. After the third call, she decided that she wasn't going to bother anymore. She wasn't one of those girls that constantly called their boyfriend until they answered. This wasn't her fault, and she refused to believe otherwise. If he wanted to speak to her, he knew how to reach her.

Right before going to sleep the night before she'd decided that she wasn't going to let this get her down anymore. She'd never let a boy get her down in the past and she wasn't planning to start now. Yes, she was angry at him for ignoring her all weekend, but she wasn't going to let that affect the rest of her day. She still had her friends, and her family. She'd deal with Julian later.

Or sooner, she thought to herself. She'd been dreading going to school this morning, knowing that she was inevitably going to see him. She was sure that once she saw him, all the anger she'd been trying to ignore all weekend would undoubtedly come to the surface.

"You guys can stop looking at me like I'm going to break now, I'm fine." She assured them, taking a sip of the coffee she'd stopped to get on her way to school.

Brooke frowned. "We're just worried, Peyt." Everyone at the table nodded in agreement.

Peyton nodded. "I know you are guys, and I appreciate that. But I'm fine. Honest." She offered them a small small. She wasn't sure how reassuring it was, but it was the best she could offer them right now.

"Have you talked to him?" Lucas asked, receiving a glare from Brooke. He shrugged. He knew that everyone at the table had been wanting to ask the same question.

"Nope." She answered, not looking them in the eye this time. If she looked at them, she knew they'd see how annoyed she was about it.

"Did he call?" Brooke asked, carefully. She didn't want to make this any harder for her then it obviously already way.

Peyton shook her head. "Nope."

Haley and Brooke exchanged a worried glance. "Did you try talking to him?"

She nodded. "I did. And it was for nothing. He ignored me all weekend."

"Hey guys."

Everyone looked up as Jake sat next to Lucas on the bench. He could sense the tension as soon as he sat down, but before he could ask what was wrong, he was interrupted.

"Hey Jake!" Peyton greeted, happily. She was thankful for the distraction. She paused as the bell rang loudly, signaling the beginning of the school day. "I've got to get to class. Jake, walk me to class?" She smiled at him, standing up to collect her things.

"Sure." He smiled, standing up with her. He picked her books up off the table as she picked up her bag. He shot Lucas a wary look, receiving a confused shrug in return.

She offered a small smile to everyone at the table before walking away with Jake. "See you guys at lunch." She called behind her.

Brooke was about to get up and walk after them when she felt someone put their hand on her arm. She looked up to see Lucas standing beside her.

"Let her go. She'll be ok. Jake's with her." He kissed her forehead. "Come on, I'll walk you to class." He picked up her books, offering her his free hand.

She sighed, taking his hand before following him into the building. "I'm worried, Lucas. She can't just walk around and pretend like everything is ok. It's not."

"I know, Pretty Girl. But, this is how Peyton handles things. When she's ready to talk, she'll come to you. You know that." He gave her hand a soft squeeze.

Brooke sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder as they walked. "I know, I just can't stand not being able to help her."

Lucas leaned over, kissing her head softly. "Peyton's a soldier. She'll be ok. And you're helping her just by being her friend."

Brooke frowned. "I just wish there was something more that we could do."

Luke nodded. "I know, babe. I know."

~*~

Peyton sighed in relief as the last bell of the day sounded. This had to have been one of the the longest day of her life. And to make it even worse, Julian hadn't been in school all day.

Even though she was still mad at him, she couldn't help being worried when she walked into the lunch room and saw that he wasn't sitting at their normal table. She'd thought, at first, that maybe he just didnt come to sit with her and their friends, but when his lab partner had asked why he'd missed their presentation earlier in the day, she knew he hadn't been in school at all.

Walking out of the building, she decided to walk home today. Her car was in the shop anyway, so she didn't need to worry about that. And the weather was just right. Not too hot, not too cold. She knew something good would come out of having to ride the bus to school that morning. She figured that the walk would help her clear her head. She hadn't been able to concentrate very much in her classes throughout the day, the only thing on her mind was Julian and the next conversation they were inevitably going to have.

As she walked down the familiar roads to her house, she found herself thinking about everything that had been happening the past few weeks. She tried to think about if she might have said or done anything that may have upset him, or caused him to pull away from her. But just like before, she came up with nothing. She wished she could think of something, anything, as to why he might be acting this way, so that she could try to fix it. Maybe then, things would be able to go back to normal.

She hadn't realized where she was going until she looked up and found herself standing infront of the Rivercourt. She wasn't surprised that she was here. This was where her and her friends had some of their best times. It was one of the only places that she could go to and always find happiness. It held a lot of her favorite memories.

She walked over and sat down on top of one of the tables next to the court, facing away from the river behind her. Looking out onto the basketball court, she swore she could see all her friends running around, throwing the basketball back and forth and through the hoop. She saw everyone laughing and joking. She saw everyone happy.

Right now, it seemed like happiness was so far away. She knew she was being silly, but at that moment, she felt like she was never going to be happy again. She'd always hated when girls based their lives around guys and how they felt about them. She could never understand why some girls acted like their world was over when they either got into an argument or broke up with them. But right now, she found herself understanding them a little more. She knew that there was a good chance she was being overdramatic about all of this, but at the same time, she didn't think so. She knew there was much more to this then what Julian was letting on. She just didn't know what. Even when he was angry with her in the past, he'd never ignored her. There had been times when Peyton thought they wouldn't get past some of the arguments they'd had, but he'd always call or come talk to her about everything, and they would normally make up pretty quickly. This obviously wasn't one of those times.

She sighed, running her hands over her face, tiredly. She hadn't gotten much sleep over the weekend. Every time she'd closed her eyes, all she saw was him. The way he acted at the club, the way he'd acted while he was drunk. She couldn't get it out of her head. She'd never seen him take a sip of alcohol in the past few years they she'd known him. Now, she felt guilty for not seeing that something was wrong sooner.

She sat there until the sun began to set, just trying to clear her mind. She would have sat there longer, but she was starting to get cold, and she didn't want to have to walk home alone in the dark.

Reluctantly, she started walking toward her house. She groaned, realizing that when she got home she'd have to deal with her father's questions again. All weekend, he'd been trying to find out what was going on. Why her friends weren't at the house, why he hadn't seen Julian. For some reason, she just couldn't pretend like everything was okay to him. She'd simply told him that she just couldn't deal with it, and left it at that. She'd stayed in her room for almost the entire weekend after that. Thankfully, he'd left her alone, only bothering her to let her know dinner was ready.

As she rounded the corner of her street, she sighed in relief when she realized her fathers car wasn't in the driveway. She really didn't feel like playing 20 questions tonight. She didn't really feel like doing anything for that matter.

She walked up the steps of her porch to her front door, pulling her keys out of her purse. She couldn't wait to get inside, take a hot shower and just crawl into bed. Right as she was about to turn the key and open the door, a movement behind her made her turn in surprise.

She stared at him for a long moment, unable to form any sort of greeting. She wasn't surprised that he was standing in front of her, she was just surprised at how long it took him to come. And now that she knew he was ok, the desire to slap him in the face only got stronger. But she held back.

"What are you doing here, Julian?" She finally asked. It was obvious if she didn't say anything, he was just going to stand there and stare at her.

"We need to talk." His voice was barely above a whisper.

She wanted to laugh at him. Now he wanted to talk? After three days of silence, he wanted to talk? But she stayed quiet. Something about the look on his face, or maybe it was the way he spoke, told her not to say anything.

"Ok.." She followed him to the porch swing, slowly taking a seat beside him. She waited, suddenly afraid of whatever he was about to say.

"So, look. I'm not really good with words. You know that. I know that.. I just really wanted to tell you that I'm sorry about Friday." He mumbled, looking down.

She watched him carefully, she could tell that he wasn't finished.

"Ok.."

"I just.. I've been going through some stuff lately. And I know that it's not fair to take that out on you. On any of you. But I can't seem to control it."

"What's going on? You can tell me, you know." She urged. She wished he would just talk to her, tell her what was going on with him.

He sighed, taking her hands in his. "There's stuff going on right now. Stuff you wouldn't understand."

She was about to object, but he cut her off. "Not that you wouldn't understand. You just couldn't." He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing. "Or maybe it's me that can't understand, but... I just.." He waited. "I don't think this is what's best for us right now." He finally said, looking away from her.

She sat there, staring at him. What did that mean?

"If what isn't what's best for us?" She hated the way her voice sounded right now. So weak - so fragile. But she couldn't help it. She had an overwhelming feeling of dread engulfing her and she wasn't sure how to escape it.

He took another deep breath before standing up and taking a few steps away from her.

He kept his back to her, looking at, what she assumed, was the houses across the street.

Finally, after what seemed like hours to Peyton, he turned toward her. The look in his eyes made her stomach fall all the way to her feet. "I don't think this relationship is what's best for us right now."

She stared at him for a second before looking away from him. She could feel her heart start to hammer in her chest as she digested his words.

She wasn't sure how long she sat there not saying anything, it was like her brain was unable to fomn any type of response. She didn't know what to do. Should she laugh? Should she cry? She didn't know what to do with herself.

She looked down at her hands before finally speaking. "You.. don't think this relationship is what's best for us? Or for you?"

He paused. "Both."

"Don't be ridiculous," She wanted to sound angry, but instead sounded like she was begging.

When he said nothing, she closed her eyes tightly, willing the tears away. This couldn't be happening.

"Don't," Her voice was just above a whisper now, realization was beginning to seep through her. "Don't do this."

He took a deep breath and stared at the ground for a long moment. When he finally look up his eyes were different. She couldn't read them.

"I'm sorry."

"You're sorry, Julian? Really? You're sorry? Well I guess that makes everything all better, doesn't it?" She didn't understand any of this. One minute they were happy and in love and the next he's barely talking to her and breaking up with her.

He remained silent. He knew he should offer her something more, but he couldn't. He knew that if they stayed together, he'd bring her down with him. And he didn't want that for her. She deserved better than that. She deserved better than him.

"So this is it?" She stood up, ready to walk away from him. She couldn't handle this right now.

"I never wanted to hurt you, Peyton." He felt like such a jerk. He knew this was going to be difficult, but he had no choice. There was no other way.

"Well it's a little too late for that, isn't it?" She muttered, angrily. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. "Is there someone else?"

"What? No!"

"Well then what is it, Julian? If there isn't someone else then what? What happened? What happened in the past 3 weeks that all of a sudden this is what's best for us? Why is breaking up the best thing for us?" She felt her resolve slipping, and the sadness sink in. But she stayed strong. She had to. She couldn't break down infront of him. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction.

He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He didn't know what to say. He knew she deserved a reason. She deserved so much more than this, and he hated himself for not giving that to her.

She stared at him, growing more angry by the second. His silence was unnerving. How could he do this to her? Hadn't he put her through enough over the past few weeks?

"Go." She said it so quietly she wasn't sure he heard her. She couldn't stand here and pretend like everything was ok. She didn't know how long she had before she completely broke down, all she knew was that it was becoming almost impossible to stay strong.

He looked up at her, his eyes filled with sorrow. He wanted nothing more then to take her into his arms and apologize for every thing he'd put her through over the past month, but he knew he couldn't do that. It wouldn't help anything. No matter how much this hurt, he knew this was the best thing for them. For her.

"Go!" She repeated with more force, looking away from him. She couldn't look at him. She didn't want to look at him. She just wanted to crawl up in her bed and forget that he ever existed.

"I'm sorry." He whispered once more before walking toward the driveway.

She turned to watch him go, desperately wanting to call him back, but knowing that she couldn't. Instead, she stood there, frozen on the top of the stairs, watching him walk away from her. From their relationship. When she couldn't see him any longer she finally allowed herself to break down. She pulled her cell phone out of her purse, taking deep shaky breaths as she dialed the familiar number. She could barely see the screen as she pressed send, her eyes blurry with tears.

The phone rang twice before the familiar cheery voice answered.

"Hey Peyt!" The voice greeted her happily, making Peyton cry even harder.

"Peyton?" Brooke's voice was panicked now as she listened to her friend cry into the phone. "Peyton, hunny, what's wrong?"

"Br-ooke." She sobbed into the phone. She tried to calm herself down, tried to tell Brooke that she needed her, but she couldn't form the words. She could barely breath.

"Peyton. Where are you? Are you home?" Brooke asked, frantically.

"Y-Ye-yes."

"Don't move. I'll be right there."

Peyton sank down on her porch steps, hugging her legs tightly to her chest. The pain was becoming unbearable.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed before she felt someone take her into their arms. She didn't even bother looking up to make sure it was Brooke. She didn't really care at this point. She just wanted the pain to go away.

"Shh. It's ok. Just let it all out." She heard Brooke whispering into her ear, hugging her tightly.

"How did this happen, Brooke?" She mumbled through her tears. She sat up to look at her friend, wishing she had the answers. But she knew that she didn't. No one did. She wasn't even sure if Julian did.

Thinking about him brought on another round of hysterics, causing Brooke to hold onto her tighter. But it passed quickly, much to Brooke's relief. Her tears didn't slow, and at this point, she wasn't sure they ever would.

Brooke felt her heart breaking as she reached out and tried to wipe away her remaining tears. "I don't know, sweetie. I don't know." She hugged her again.

"I want to be mad at him. I want to hate him. But I can't. I just want this to go away. I want everything to just go away and I want everything to be normal again. I want us to be us again." She closed her eyes tightly. She wished she could turn her brain off. She didn't want to think about this anymore.

Brooke frowned. She knew there was nothing that she could say to make her feel better, but wishing all the same that something would come to her.

"Come on, it's getting cold out here. Let's get you inside."

Peyton nodded, but said nothing. She stood up, with Brooke's help, and followed her inside.

As they were about to climb the stairs and go up to her room, she stopped. She realized that going into her room right now was not a good idea. Everything in there reminded her of him.

Brooke seemed to realize this as well, because she started walking with her toward the living room.

She collapsed onto the couch, thinking about how she'd have to get rid of everything later. She couldn't avoid her room forever. She felt her heart break a little more at the thought.

Brooke wrapped her arms around her once more as she began to break down again.

"It's ok, Peyton. It's going to be ok."

~*~

It was dark when Peyton opened her eyes. She looked around and noticed she wasn't in her living room anymore. She realized that she must have cried herself to sleep, and someone must have carried her upstairs.

The last thing she remembered was Brooke coming over and telling her everything was going to be ok. She wasn't sure how everything was going to be ok, but decided that she'd believe her for now. At this point, she wasn't sure that it could get any further from ok. She wished that made her feel better, but it brought very little comfort.

She wondered for a moment when she'd fallen asleep and who brought her upstairs, but decided that it didn't matter. She laid there for a few more seconds before glancing over toward her alarm clock. 10:05. That's it?

She reluctantly got out of her bed, making her way out of her room toward the bathroom. Once inside, she looked into the mirror, flinching slightly at the reflection staring back at her. Her hair was a mess, her eyes were puffy and bloodshot. She looked like she felt. Horrible. She took her time taking a shower, letting the hot water burn her skin. It felt like she was trying to burn the pain away.

Once she was done, she walked into the hallway, ready to just go back to bed and forget this day ever happened, but voices from downstairs made her pause.

Curiously, she slowly made her way down the stairs, expecting to see her dad sitting on the couch watching television but was surprised to see Brooke, Lucas, Nathan, Haley and Jake sitting there. They seemed to be deep in conversation, none of them hearing her approach. It was another moment before Lucas looked up, noticing her standing in the doorway.

"Hey sleepyhead!" He greeted, causing everyone to look over at her.

She smiled weakly at everyone, making her way toward the couch before sitting down inbetween Brooke and Haley. She laid her head on Brooke's shoulder, silently thanking her for being there.

Haley and Brooke both took each of her hand in one of theirs. They knew she needed their support and they would give it to her. For as long as she needed.

"Okay!" Nathan clapped his hands together, getting everyone's attention. "We've got Monopoly, we've got Clue. We've got a bunch of chick flicks," He paused, making a face. Everyone laughed. "We've got my 2 good buddies Ben & Jerry, we've got 2 large pepperoni pizzas and we've got Twister." He smiled widely at her, motioning toward everything infront of them.

"What'll it be?" Jake asked eagerly.

She looked around at all her friends, feeling her eyes water all over again. This time it wasn't because she was sad. She was so grateful for all of them. She didn't know what she'd do without her friends, each and every one of them.

A couple of hours ago, she'd felt as if the world was crashing down around her. She felt like she'd never be able to smile or to be happy again. But now, looking around at all the people she loved, she knew that it would be ok. She wasn't naive enought to believe that everything would be ok right away, but in time, she knew, that things would get better. She just wished it was sooner, rather then later.

"You know, I am the master at Clue." She finally said, causing everyone to laugh. Probably in relief, she noted.

"Thanks, you guys." She smiled at all of them. She really did have the best friends ever.

Brooke put a reassuring arm around her shoulders, giving her a small squeeze. She smiled at her in return. She knew that was her way of telling her that they were all going to be there for her, no matter what.

"I call Miss Scarlet!"

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