Meant To Be Chapter 4: That's my goal, a twilight fanfic

Hi. My name is Jasper Hale. I told you the last chapter of our story. Let me continue the story, and let you know what happened afterwards:

Hmmmm yeah, yeah yeaaah

There she was, smiling at me, like she was happy to see me, like I hadn't been away, only out on a walk. I smiled a little nervous smile. Was this Godlike woman meant for me? She stood with my door in her little hand.

"Ooops," she smiled. I laughed a little.

"Can I come in?" I asked, even though it was my room. She laughed at me and stepped aside.

"Sure," she smiled and put the door back on its hinges. I walked inside and she closed the door behind me. I felt two arms around my waist.

"Welcome home Jasper," she whispered against my back. I had missed that.

You know where I come from.
You know my story.
You know why I'm standing here.
Tonight.
Please don't go.
Don't be in a hurry.
I'm here to make it clear.
Make it right.

"Thanks," I answered and we walked over to my bed. We sat down and I looked into her eyes. How could I ever make it up to her again? I felt her love to me running through my whole body. It was so sweet and so hot it was almost unbelievable. I sighed deeply. It was unbelievable!

"Jasper just tell me. I know your story and I know why you're sitting here now," she said. I stood up, wanted to leave. It was so different from what I remembered. It was twice as strong. Twice as strong to understand and twice as hard to resist the urge to take her sweet angelic face between my hands and kiss her. Twice as hard not to turn around and rip her clothes of, but I had to be the southern gentleman.

"Jasper!" her voice so sad, and panicked. I turned around and in the 30th of a second she was clinging to my chest, her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I put my arms around her and she pressed herself closer to me.

"Don't leave," she whispered into the hollow of my throat.

"Never again," I promised, "If that makes it clear, makes it right then never!" She smiled against my throat. I walked back to the bed and sat down on it. Alice didn't let go of me.

"Jasper, Jessica…" she started, but I broke her off.

"I know. We're going to visit her later," I answered, "But right now I need to say sorry! I need to tell you how sorry I am! How much I…" she put her finger in front of my lips and broke of my train of words.

"Sssh… it's okay. I still love you. Don't worry," she whispered against my throat, but how could I not? How could I not worry? Worry why I deserved this lovely person? What had I done right?

"But how can I not?" I asked. She sighed deep and for the first time, since I was about to leave, she looked at me. Looking me in my eyes, caressing my cheekbones.

"Jasper, I love you, okay? Please grasp that! And there is nothing you can do about it! The end!" she said and again hid her face in the hollow of my throat. I caressed her back, drawing circles with my fingers.

"Alice just let me get this out okay?" I asked, hoping for her acceptance. She sighed, the air she let out ticked against my skin.

"Okay Jasper. If it makes you feel better, then yes," she answered.

Well I know I've acted foolish
But I promise you no more
I've finally found that something
Worth reaching for

How could I explain? How could I make her understand? There were so many questions and so few answers. I kept caressing her back, and I could feel her happiness in my whole body. I had been so blind, to not see her love for me and my love for her. And now that I had realized it, how could I not believe her love was just as strong for me, when I could feel it? I knew how hard it had been for her, when I had left her. And how could I not have believed it until I had seen it myself?

"Jasper?" she whispered concerned. I had been deep in thought, so I hadn't told her anything.

"Yes Alice?" I asked, kissing her hair.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yes I'm fine. I was just lost in thoughts," I answered and kept caressing her back. She nodded and we sat in silence a couple of minutes, until I had decided how to tell her.

"Alice I know, I have acted foolish. But I promise you, it will happen no more. I have done the unforgiving, and I know, I was cruel. But now…" I took an unnecessary breath, "but now I found something… something there is worth living for, and Alice? That's you." I could feel her clinging herself closer to my body. I felt electric currents running through my whole body – even the part of me that I wouldn't think of right now.

"No Jasper. Not unforgiving. Never unforgiving," she whispered and again her breath tickled my throat.

"Alice, I need you. I need your very presence to exist. I simply cannot exist without you. I know I was with Jessica and claimed I loved her. But Alice I didn't. I loved you from the very first moment I saw you, but I… I… I didn't know it. I couldn't realize it, I wouldn't realize it. Because you were my sister, and I couldn't love my sister, right? I couldn't love you, but now I know better. I know, I can love you, and I know I will love you. Love you from the day, that we met 'till the day this world will stop existing. Until that day I will love you with all of my heart, and even more. I'm a vampire, and we fairly change, but I changed, when I saw you. I wanted to be better. I would give you the world and even more, and I still will. I changed my life for you, and if you want me to change again, then I will do it. I will do it for you, and only you. If you ask for the stars, I will go to heaven and pick them to you. And if you want me to leave, I will do it - even though it will hurt, I will leave you and this family. If you don't love me anymore, then I will go away, out of your life, so you can be happy with another person, and if you want to cheat on him, then I will be the one you will do it with, if you want," I said and held her tight.

"Jasper…" she started, but I stopped her.

"Wait Alice there is more," I said.

I'm not here to say I'm sorry
I'm not here to lie to you
I'm here to say I'm ready
That I've finally thought it through
I'm not here to let your love go
I'm not giving up oh no
I'm here to win your heart and soul
That's my goal

Would the next part come out right? Or would it sound like some bullshit? I didn't know, but I had to try; had to make her understand, had to make her see, why I needed to make my saying sorry such a big deal. But it was to me – it was a big deal to me. And somewhere inside I knew, she would understand. But I still had to try. And even if it ended badly, I would still do anything and everything to make her happy, even if it didn't include me – even if it was without me. If she wanted some space, then I would give her all the space, which she needed and even more, is she wanted. I would back of, if she wanted me to, and I would come closer, if she wanted me to do that.

"Then tell me Jasper, tell me what you want. Tell me anything you want," she sighed. I kept caressing her back, and she finally relaxed a little.

"Alice I'm here, home, to say I'm ready. Ready to love you and ready to love with you for the rest of my existence. I'm here to say, that I finally have thought it through, that I finally realized that I need you. I'm not here to let your love go, disappear, like it means nothing to me, because that's not true! It means everything. You are the center of my personal universe, and you always will be," I took another unnecessary breath to calm myself. It didn't work very well.

"Thanks Jasper," she whispered and snuggled even closer, if that was possible.

"Alice, I'm not giving up – not giving up on your heart and soul, because I believe we all have a soul. And I will keep fighting for yours. I will make sure no one touches you in a way you don't like. Alice, you are my goal – my goal for returning, my goal for keep fighting and my goal for my dead heart," I said and she smiled. I could feel how much this meant for her.

"And Alice?" I said.

"Yes?" she answered.

"I will go shopping with you tomorrow," I said and she giggled. She started caressing my neck with her fingers. The touch was feather like, and I liked it. I liked it too much, and I took a deep breath to calm the unwanted part of me down. I succeeded.

"Alice, I'm not here to say I'm sorry, but…" she jumped up.

"You're not sorry?!?! I mean nothing to you?" she shrieked and flew towards the door. I was faster than her and caught her, before she was out of the door.

Please don't go
You know that I need you
I can't breathe without you
Live without you
Be without you
Well I know I've acted foolish
But I promise you no more
No more

"All that you said before meant nothing?" she asked with sad eyes and started to sob. I turned her around and held her close.

"No Alice you're wrong. I am sorry. You mean everything to me and all that I said before - I meant every word of it, even the little on and in and all the other little words. Alice please don't go. I can't live without you, I can't be without you, and I cannot breathe without you. I need you, and you know that. Then tell me why shouldn't I care about you?" I asked, while I lifted her up and walked back to my bed with her in my arms. I pressed her closer, and she dug her nails into my shirt, and ended up ruining it. She looked at my shirt and then at me, and a sleepily smile played on her lips.

"Ooops," she said and looked down on the ruined shirt again. I sat a little back and removed my shirt, and Alice stared at my bare chest. I took another deep breath and closed my eyes.

"Alice, I acted foolish, and I will beg for forgiveness, if you want me to. I will promise you every day from now to tomorrow and all the way to the end of this world, that it will happen no more," I said not opening my eyes. She still stared at my bare chest, her breathing a little uneven. I could trace a little hint of lust in her feelings, and in some way I liked it.

"Can you remember the time when Jessica and you were a couple?" she asked not taking her eyes of my chest.

"Yes, only too well," I mumbled and started to caress her back again. She liked it and sighed happily.

"Well, when you and she were together, I used to lie in my room, pretending you were lying next to me. When you came home from your reunion date, or whatever you want to call it, when you walked in to my room, and I was naked, I liked your idea of us, but you were with Jessica, so I couldn't tell you," she breathed. I smiled a little, and she started tracing my lips with her finger. I kissed her finger, and she stopped. I opened my eyes to find her staring at her finger and then at me. She lit up in a beautiful smile, and I smiled back. It was weird, but I had never felt this way about anyone.

"You're happy," she said.

"Yes," I smiled, "Very happy." She smiled even more

She knew, I wasn't home, because I needed to say sorry. She knew, I was, but she also knew, it was my feelings for her, that had brought me home. She knew, I didn't lie to her. She knew, I was ready to love her, and I had thought it all through. She knew, I would fight for her love, and if I died in the try, I would die happy. I was there to win her heart and soul, and I wasn't giving up. She knew, she was my goal, and that was really all that mattered.

We were still sitting on my bed. I had closed my eyes again, and she still stared at my bare chest, but I did understand her. She had never seen a naked, okay half naked boy before, even less a grown up man. I was just happy, it wasn't my pants she had ruined, because then we would have a minor problem. But you never knew with Alice, if she got to happy now, she would probably, okay no probably, ruin my pants, and then we would our small problem.

"Jasper?" she asked and broke the silence.

"Mmmm?" I answered and tried to decide whether to open my eyes or not.

"Look at me?" she asked. I opened my eyes to find her smiling.

"Can I touch?" she asked and looked away a little shy.

"Touch what?" I asked gently forcing her to look at me.

"Your chest," she answered and bit her perfect bottom lip. I smiled to her.

"Sure," I answered and took her hand, only to place it on my bare chest, "Here you go." I closed my eyes again, and for a long time she didn't move her hand. Then she crawled a little closer and started to trace the pattern of my chest, touching my every muscle. We sat like this a long time, a couple of hours, I think, if not more. It was good, we had holyday, because otherwise I think, we had missed school. No one disturbed us, and I had to thank Edward for that some day. We could hear Bella running after her car and then coming back driving in it. I was glad my suitcases were home now. Her hand stopped again, and I could hear, she hesitated, so I smiled to her, even though I still had my eyes closed.

"Jasper, can I try something?" she whispered.

"What do you want to try?" I asked.

"Ummm… it's a surprise," she answered. I pretended to think about it for a moment.

"Why don't you tell me?" I answered. She was very still a couple of seconds.

"You will say yes," she smiled. I could hear the excitement in her voice, and I could also feel it running through her body.

"Then I guess, it is a yes," I smiled and waited to feel something new. I didn't feel anything for a second, but then I felt her climbing onto my lab. I didn't move, so I wouldn't frighten her.

"Is this too much?" she asked concerned. I shook my head.

"No. Its fine," I answered. She leaned against my bare chest, and sighed happily. She was very happy, like it was something, which she had been dreaming about. Suddenly I could feel her hands tracing down my leg. I opened my eyes, and she got surprised, and ended up ruining my pants. Not good! She stared down on my legs, and I followed her gaze. She had ruined them just below my private part of my body. She just stared at my legs and the ruined pants.

"Alice, can you move a second, so I can get rid of these?" I asked and pointed to my ruined pants. She nodded and climbed down my lab. I stood up walking to my closet, knowing there would be at least three pair of jeans in there. I stripped down to my boxers and found a pair of jeans. It was so strange to feel the love between Alice and me. It was strong, and it was nice. It had felt nice, when she had touched my chest or ripping my pants into shreds. I just wouldn't tell her that, because then I would have no pants left. She would rip them to pieces every single pair of them. I was about to take my jeans on, when someone ripped it out them out of my hands. I looked up a found Alice standing with them in her hands. She looked at me with big curious eyes.

Well I won't stop believing.
That we will be leaving together.
So when I say I love you.
I'll mean it forever and ever.
Ever and ever

She knew, I would never stop believing – believing we would leave this world together. And the day I would tell her; I love you, she would know, that I meant it forever and ever, and ever and ever. And she would believe me.

It was a little weird to have her standing right there when I hadn't anything but boxers on. I knew, she was the closest thing to a girlfriend for me right now, but still. I stood a little surprised and chocked over her reaction. She had sneaked up behind me, when I was lost in thoughts, and then snapped the jeans, and that surprised me.

"Ummm…. Can I have my jeans back?" I asked and reached out to take them from her hands. She shook her head and took a step backwards. Okay, that was weird!

"Okay? Why not?" I asked confused. Now I was even more chocked, surprised and confused. This had to be the weirdest thing, which I had ever tried.

"You have the most beautiful body, I have ever seen. Why cover it up with clothes?" she answered - asking a new question. She walked over and put the jeans back where it belonged.

"Because I don't know, when someone will walk into this room, and there is some part of me that I can't control," I answered. If I could have blushed, I would. This was a little embarrassing.

"If that part want a look, then he's welcome," she answered and did something I wasn't prepared for. She stripped down too, to her underwear. I looked around my closet, embarrassed.

"Jasper?" she asked, but I kept looking around. I hoped Edward wouldn't listen to our thoughts right now, and if he did, then I hoped, that he would not think about it.

"Jazz?" she asked again, her voice like silk, and I had to look at her. She walked closer and closer, until she was standing only inches away from me. She placed her hands on my waist and pressed herself closer. I took a very deep breath and tried to calm myself down. No success. I placed my hands on her hips and lifted her up. She clanged to my body now. I pushed her closer to my body. She started to kiss my neck, and my breath became uneven. I made my way back into my room and over to my bed.

"Alice? Are you…?" I tried to ask, but she kissed me and my question became cut off. She pushed herself even closer, and I could feel her lust and love racing through her body.

"Jasper, do me a favor," she ordered with ragged breath.

"Yes?" I answered and let my hand slide down her body. Oh God it felt nice! The lust started to race around my body, mixed together with our love. It was so nice!

"Make the rest hungry! Now!" she ordered. I did as she told me to. I could hear Edward's steps on the stairs towards my door.

"No! We are not hungry!" I told him in my mind.

"I'll tell the others that. Have fun," he answered.

"Shut up. And don't tell!" Alice told him.

"Only Bella," he answered.

"Okay. Now go!" I said and he walked downstairs again. A little later they left.

"Jasper, take me to bed," Alice whispered in my ear and the now wanted part became hard.

I'm not here to say I'm sorry.
I'm not here to say I'm sorry.
I'm not here to lie to you.
I'm here to say I'm ready.
That I've finally thought it through.
(Oh I'm ready)
I'm not here to let your love go.
I'm not giving up oh no.
I'm here to win your heart and soul.
(That's why I'm here babe)
Yes I'm here to win your heart and soul.
That's my goal.
That's my goal.