Disclaimer: Harry Potter and his world belong to J. K. Rowling
Chapter 4:
Teams of nurses cared for Harry in those first critical weeks, all women, as Beth had ordered. She knew her father. Only a woman's voice could soothe his nightmares, and she thought that he must have women around him now. They had tried to find nurses whom he knew. The Ministry was using all their influence to help. There was Lorae, whom he'd taught at school, two grand-daughters, Sandra and Jennifer, and another, Lee, whom he knew less well. Will would help them lift, although Harry was so emaciated that he was not heavy.
Hermione had searched for, and found an old medical monitor that looked like a shabby red leather book. The sensor device looked just like a watch, and was worn around the wrist. The patient could be continuously monitored with this device, and not be disturbed. Harry had invented it himself, when he needed as much help as he could get as he battled illness on a previous occasion.
Harry always wore a watch on each wrist, and they were still there. For the first time, Hermione saw the reason. As she slipped his watch off to replace it with the sensor, she noticed old white scarring encircling the wrist. She didn't stop then, but as soon as he was settled, she checked the other wrist, and found the same thing. At one time he'd been tied, it appeared, and for some reason had not been able to free himself with his magic. Hermione had been his healer for more than sixty years. She wondered why she'd never known about those wounds.
Harry was still unconscious, but the monitor had a consciousness indicator, that showed that he hovered just below the line of consciousness. Ben, Hermione's son, now Healer Weasley, was with her. But there was little to do except watch and wait.
In the next few days, he scarcely moved, although he sometimes opened his eyes. His carers were not sure whether he knew where he was or not. He didn't speak, and made no response when he was spoken to. The readings on the monitor were appalling, but Hermione had seen him come back from as bad a condition before. This time, though, it was more than physical. What if he didn't want to come back?
The first indication Harry showed that he knew he was not alone was when one of his nurses was trying to feed him. Will was supporting him, and the nurse was trying to spoon some ice-cream into his mouth. Hermione had suggested ice-cream, knowing from previous experience that he might take ice-cream when he would refuse anything else. He would not cooperate, and kept looking to the side where no-one was.
Lorae was getting frustrated, he had to eat, and finally said, almost sobbing, "Please Harry."
His gaze turned to her face then, and she was able to feed him.
Weeks went by. To Hermione and Ben, it was as if he made no progress at all. Still he never spoke, and seldom made any indication of recognition. Beth said that they just had to wait. That it was going to take a very long time. She and Jeremiah stayed on. Beth knew she was still needed.
They tried to shave him once, but the disturbance apparently irritated him, and to stop them, he brushed his own cheeks with his hands, and he was cleanshaven. He did it regularly after that, sometimes, it seemed, almost in his sleep.
Few people were allowed in to see him, aside from his immediate carers. A tabby cat strolled in one day, leapt onto the bed, settled herself, and started to purr. Harry raised a feeble, shaking hand, and stroked the cat. Beth was pleased. Anything to help, and she wondered if this was one of the descendants of a stray cat that had come to her own comfort once when she'd been a heart-broken child. From then on, the cat visited him often. He stroked it, and sometimes even talked to it, although he talked to no-one else.
It was not until well into March that Harry spoke to one of his carers for the first time. He was regarding Hermione who was feeling his pulse, and using a couple of different monitors to take some readings of health measures that were not shown on the red book/monitor.
"Are you dead too, then?"
Hermione jumped, but then smiled at him. "I'm not dead, and neither are you. And it's time for you to start making a bit of an effort to get better."
But Harry said, "Of course I'm dead. If I wasn't dead, Ginny and Luna wouldn't be here. Only Julie would be here. And Julie's not here, so I must be dead."
Hermione opened her mouth, and closed it again. What could she say to that? It seemed logical, and no-one had told him that Julie had refused to return.
Harry was convinced that he was dead, and nothing anyone could say would persuade him different. Most people he ignored, although occasionally thanking Will or his nurses politely when they did something for him.
He had not gained in strength, or even put on any weight, and Hermione knew that the slightest disturbance might still kill him. He spent most of his time asleep, or drifting, barely conscious. There was always a nurse with him, awake and alert. Beth had told them. He must not be allowed to have nightmares, and that they were to act straight away to soothe him if he started to fidget and mutter in his sleep.
Hermione thought that his conviction that he was dead might interfere with his recovery, but Beth told her not to worry. If he already thought that he was dead, he was less likely to make himself die. And Hermione learned for the first time how easy it would be for Harry. Beth told her. Just find the place, a gentle squeeze, and he would be dead. That Harry had known for a very long time, and that she, Beth, knew because Harry knew.
Both Hermione and Ben kept a close watch. Ben didn't understand how Harry was still alive. The Nisco readings were so appallingly bad. Hermione just reminded him that Harry was different. An LV of less than 10, for a normal person, meant death. But Harry was not a normal person, and she told him of an occasion before when he'd been very sick, when Ben had not yet been born. Harry had recovered anyway, though a full recovery had taken years.
Beth started trying to call him back to life. She thought that his conviction that he was dead was a self-protective mechanism, as what had happened to him was just too much to cope with. But it couldn't go on indefinitely.
She began to allow him more visitors, but would always stay as well. He must not be upset, even in the slightest degree. They were only ever visitors that he knew very well. She always warned them beforehand of his extreme emaciation. She didn't want tactless comments, such as the one that Tracy had made when she brought in a breakfast tray.
Harry had appeared to be asleep, and Tracy had exclaimed, "He looks like a skeleton!"
Harry had replied in a tone of irritation, "What do you expect of a dead person?"
Jimmy Carr came, made no comment on his appearance, and spoke about the horses, and especially which mares he thought they should breed from. Beth was very pleased, as Harry forgot that he was dead, and entered into the discussion.
Cissy scarcely rode any more, and Harry suggested that Jimmy speak to her about her own mare, Senorita, and the three grown up Andalusians bred from her. Maybe it would be as well to sell the young ones. They had too many horses.
"Mischief," said Jimmy. "What about Mischief?"
"Well, I'd never sell her, of course, but I can't ride her any more. What do you think?"
Harry was being perfectly normal, and so he was when two of Melissa's girls came in to tell him about the gymkhana they'd been to.
But when Lorae came to help him with his meal, he frowned at her and asked why she was not at school. And when she said that she was a nurse, and helping look after him, he said that it was silly, that she shouldn't waste her time on someone that was already dead. And maybe she was just pretending, and wasn't there at all.
He still needed everything done for him, and could not even sit up by himself, so that Will helped him a lot, and he still had four nurses working shifts. He never upset Will by claiming to be dead, only thanking him politely when Will helped him.
He was apt to ignore his nurses, though, and when Sandra rebuked him, he stared at the ceiling and said, "When you're dead, you don't have to be polite," and the redhead had a fit of giggles.
Beth was in two minds when Jebedee came to call. Would it upset him? But Harry and Jebedee had been close for years. Eventually, she showed him in, but as usual, staying herself, inconspicuous in the corner.
Jebedee greeted him, but Harry told him to go away, that he was talking to Ginny as he should be able to see. Jebedee scratched his head, and went away. Beth told him not to worry, that he always spoke to dead people when he was sick. This was the first that Jebedee knew of that, and was very surprised.
He spoke to Beth instead. The Dementors had apparently gone, and everything was peaceful again. Several of the aurors had been given medals, three different grades of the Baldo Auror Award. And every auror, from every country, had been given a special medal. It may only have taken a few months, but it had been a war, and there were casualties, and there had been bravery, and there had been acts of heroism. He had one for Harry, too, as he'd saved the lives of Aurors Paul, Heinrich and Lucas. Beth accepted it, and said that she'd put it away for him, but that right now, he was obviously not ready to think about anything to do with Dementors or wars.
Spring came, and Harry finally started to become stronger. He could sit out of bed now, for an hour or two at a time. And he no longer slept as much. Two of the nurses returned to their usual jobs, only Lee and Lorae remaining.
On a warm and windy day, Jimmy Carr came to Beth. "Two new foals! Do you think he'd like to see?"
Beth went to the window, and looked out. Sunshine might do him good.
An hour later, an old wheelchair had been unearthed, and Harry was sitting talking to some mares, admiring two spindly colts. "You've done well," he told a chestnut mare. And the mare put her head down to him and blew on his face.
Jebedee grinned broadly as he arrived, and approached the group. He paused a distance away, though, maybe Harry still wouldn't want to see him. But Harry looked up, and raised a hand in greeting, and nodded as Beth spoke to him. Beth beckoned.
Jebedee took care to stay away from difficult subjects, and spoke about the uncommon beauty of the mares and foals instead.
"She's the blood of Sheba," Harry told him. "Have I told you about Sheba?"
"Oh, yes, many times," said Jebedee. Harry was apt to be a bore about his horses.
Harry looked at him, and for the first time in a very long time, he had a grin of amusement on his face, and said, in a soothing voice, "I won't tell you again then."
Hermione came to find him, and told Will that he was to be put back to bed, that he was getting too tired. Harry made no objection. Will started to turn the wheelchair back to the house, but Harry asked him to wait a moment, and turned back to Jebedee.
"Just wanted to know, did Lucas make it back?"
Jebedee said. "They all did, they're all fine."
Harry nodded quite casually. "I sent him with the spell I use to send luggage, thought it might kill him. Glad that it didn't!"
But that night, Lee was unable to soothe his nightmare, and he woke screaming, threshing desperately against the bedclothes, and hauling himself on hands and knees to the opposite side of the room, away from her, as he sobbed in terror.
Lee retreated as it seemed that she was the object of his fears. Beth was needed before he slowly calmed down, and Will was able to lift him back into bed.
The upset didn't kill him, but again he wouldn't speak to anyone except his cat. And when Jebedee came to call, Hermione soundly rebuked him and wouldn't let him near, in spite of Jebedee's protests that it was Harry who'd brought up the subject.
Julie and Adrian were still in America. Julie knew that Harry was still very sick and found herself unable to muster the courage to see him. There had been three other survivors, and it was known what had been done to Harry. Julie was convinced that he'd be something different now, maybe he'd lost his soul. And what had she heard once? If it can, the Dementors will feed on you long enough to reduce you to something like itself - soulless and evil.
But Adrian's complaints were getting more and more persistent, and finally, she made arrangements for him to go home. It was with the help of the Ministry. It seemed they couldn't help Harry Potter enough these days.
No-one told Harry. They were afraid that Julie would change her mind about allowing his son to return. He had still not asked about Julie.
As soon as he arrived at home, Adrian didn't wait for Hermione's precautionary warnings, but raced to the bedroom, and threw himself on Harry who'd been sleeping. Harry woke with a start, but the surprise was a good one, and he hugged the boy close.
Adrian was sobbing, "It's been half a whole year! And I'm seven now, and you missed my birthday!"
Harry apologised, and said that if Tracy could organise it, he'd have a birthday cake that very day, and he could have whatever he wanted as a present. But then he frowned, "But is it really May?"
Lorae, the nurse, was smiling as she waited in her chair in the corner. Harry was still never left alone, and this was the first live human he'd spoken to in several days.
Adrian had done him a lot of good, but was sent off after a while. He must not be made too tired.
So Adrian followed Jimmy Carr for the rest of the day, as Jimmy tended to horses. The two colts just born were not the only foals. But Adrian had a special request. He wanted to go to the Old Horses' Paddock, and as they petted the pampered old horses that lived peaceful lives here, he asked Jimmy about his father. He looked so old and so thin. Was he going to get better?
Jimmy pulled a brush from his pocket, and started using it on an old chestnut mare. "Of course he will," said Jimmy, in a tone of absolute confidence. "He's the boss, he can do anything!" And Adrian was reassured.
Harry, still in bed, had been staring at the ceiling. Almost for the first time since he'd been brought home, he had a request. Lorae and Will helped him into the wheelchair, as he could still only stand very briefly, and he went to his office. Lorae was planning to stay with him, he was never supposed to be left alone. But he asked for privacy, and she found herself automatically obeying. Suddenly it was as if he was the boss again, rather than a very sick patient.
It never occurred to Harry that his magic might not be there when he needed it, and his transcriber came to him, and paper. He only had to raise a hand. His wand had been with him when he'd been taken, but he still wasn't ready to think about that, and he firmly turned his mind to the problem of coaxing his wife back.
The resulting letter was a description of the trivial events that made up life at home, the small, the warm, and the comforting. The new foals, Chris's sons' show jumping triumphs, a suggestion that she herself might like to ride one of the young purebred Andalusians in shows, the cat that had adopted him, and answered to the name of Calliope, or Cally.
He realised just how much he'd let things slip. He'd only been outside that once, and then he'd been stupid and made himself sick again.
He ended with a hope that Julie had enjoyed her holiday, and a suggestion that she might like to come home again now, as Adrian was already missing her. He finished with his characteristic half-legible handwritten signature. He was already trembling with weariness, but folded the paper, and made the door open, so that he could hand it to Will, with a request to Chrissy to send it to Julie for him.
Hermione was with Lorae as they waited. Hermione always kept a watch on the monitor, and had seen that he was becoming acutely tired again. She hoped that he hadn't written that he was dead, or that Ginny and Luna and even Ron, frequently visited. That would not persuade Julie to return.
They let in Adrian often then, as he promised not to wake his father when he was sleeping. But when he woke, they went out for a short while every day, to look at the foals, talk to the riding horses, and visit the Old Horses' Paddock, which was a favourite place of Adrian's and Harry's both.
In America, at her sister's home, Julie read and re-read the letter from her husband. She started to pack. She had been silly and selfish again, and her husband needed her. She was not fooled for a moment by his claim that it was Adrian who missed her.
It was after dark when she returned, apparating to the zone in the grounds, as there was too much precision needed for the small apparation zone in the house. But her wand provided light, and she knew the path well. She was challenged as she made her way to the house, but it was only Melissa with her dog, doing her job as a security guard.
Melissa looked at her with doubt, although politely concealed. They'd all been warned that Harry was very fragile, and to take great care what they said. Melissa had never been very impressed with Julie's brains.
She needn't have worried. Julie spoke to Hermione, who was sitting in the loungeroom reading a book, Hermione introduced her to Lee, and Lee left Harry alone with his wife. Harry was sleeping, but his wife cuddled up next to him, and he turned to her.
Hermione watched the monitor in the loungeroom, thinking that she was an old lady, and was entitled to indulge her curiosity. There was the characteristic pattern of energy changes, and she knew that Julie and Harry were making love.
Beth, in the library, didn't need the monitor. She felt the joy in the air, and knew it came from Julie and from Harry. Maybe she could go home soon. Jeremiah had been getting very restless. They'd just wait for the school holidays, and then Kate could come home with them.
In the morning, Julie woke before Harry, and just looked at him. He was still so terribly thin, and his face was pale and haggard. They'd been apart so long. She stroked his hair, quite long now, as it had not been cut since the previous July, before he'd been taken. There were streaks of white.
She smiled, she thought that it would look good if he left it long. She was always annoyed when people didn't realise who he was. Long hair, streaked white, would make him look more the great wizard!
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