"No, don't! Please! Ah… Ah… What are you doing? Uhn, no!" A half-naked blonde screamed as he thrashed wildly on the bed, fists hitting a larger silver-haired man straddling him.
"Fufufufu… (1) You should know by now that resistance is futile. Now come on, be good, Naru-chan… -hearts-" The man cackled as he tried to wrestle off the boy's pants.
Naruto kicked, flailed and screamed as hard as he could but it was to no avail; the stupid pervert was too strong.
"Be a good wife, Naruto. I'll treat you well…" were the last words Naruto heard before…
"AAHHHHHHHHH ———————————————————!!"
A blonde boy shot up from bed, his fox-paw printed pajamas soaked in sweat and his fox-ears nightcap laid haphazardly on his equally soaked pillow. His heart was beating so fast it felt like it was going to spring out of his ribcage any minute. His ears were ringing and his eyes saw nothing.
A few still moments later, the boy regained his bearings (from the mental trauma) and expelled a sigh of relief.
"So it was just a dream. THANK KAMI!"
Looking at the Ultraman Tiga clock by his bed — it was already 5 a.m., an inconvenient time where he's stuck between going back to bed or getting to school too early — he got up from bed and prepared to set a new record for the new term, albeit with much grumbling and cursing at a particular someone. Someone who 'if he thinks he can get me to be a good wife, he's gonna get a good kick in the nuts, that pervert scarecrow!'
Somewhere in an executive apartment, a silver haired man shot up from his bed and sneezed before grabbing his blanket and plopping back to bed.
FIRST LOVE
Step IV: What the name Hatake Kakashi strikes in the hearts of many
"Oi Naruto, why look so down? This is only the start of the first term, ya know? This dead-fish look of yours only appears near the mid terms and the exams yo …-sigh- …Seeing your face like this makes me miss Akamaru already…"
"Naruto, you okay? Do you want some of my rice crackers? I'll let you choose between the Teriyaki and the BBQ ones."
"…."
"Come to school early and this is the first thing I see? This is troublesome…"
Four voices (three actually, but it's the presence that counts) piped up behind him as Naruto sat at his desk looking like ramen has been banned from the face of the earth and all the miso in the world has been buried and forgotten (2).
Irritated and deprived of sleep, the blonde turned to face his friends and gritted his teeth.
"… Leave me alone-ttebayo!"
"Aww… Naru-chan is in a bad mood today? Could it be …is it that time of the month? Heh, I'm glad I came to school earlier today to see your miserable face." Inuzuka Kiba, the canine-maniac and second loudest in the group, smirked and ruffled the boy's blonde hair, messing it up even more.
A vein ticked on Naruto's forehead.
"Kiba, that's physically impossible. After all, Naruto is male." Aburame Shino, the coolly logical, enigmatic and quiet one in the group, inserted his two-cents.
Used to Shino's ability to state the obvious, the group merely gave a one minute silence before moving on.
Akimichi Chouji, the kind-hearted, big-boned (self-proclaimed) and constantly hungry, merely looked at Naruto in concern before rummaging in his bags and pulling out the 2 bags of crackers then dangled them in the blonde's face. His own drool was slowly accumulating already, though.
The last person in the group merely sighed and plopped down in front of the blonde.
"Just tell us what's wrong already. It's just going to get more troublesome with Kiba later." Nara Shikamaru muttered (earning a dirty glare from Kiba in the process and a 'who is troublesome, you say!') as he yawned loudly and looked out the window. Today's weather seems nice but it might be a cloudless day… Che. That means he couldn't skip class and go cloud-watching later.
"… …Do you guys really want to know?" The blonde asked, his blue eyes widening at the unexpected concern (?) his friends were expressing.
"Yes."
"Do you guys really, really want to know?" The cerulean orbs widen more.
"Yes."
"Really, really, really want to know?" The blue eyes were sparkling now.
"YES."
"Hmm, but I don't really feel like telling… What to do…" The blonde muttered as he looked away from the group, oblivious to the murderous looks and aura directed his way.
"… …."
"I'm gonna kill this kid. Everyone in right?" Kiba growled as he cracked his knuckles and stretched his arms. Shino adjusted his shades, making them sparkle menacingly. Chouji ripped open the bag of BBQ crackers with a loud 'snap' and flames were burning in his eyes. Shikamaru pinched the bridge of his nose and groaned.
"Ah… Stop. Stop! I'll tell… Alright since you guys really wanna know…" The blonde sneaked a peek at the four boys and saw the killing aura rose. "I'll say."
Taking a deep breath, Naruto declared (softly, since a few students were trickling in) with a miserable face, "I'm getting married."
"No!" The (Italian-accented) negative was ejected by a shell-shocked Kiba, who was shaking his head feverishly and at a rapid pace. If he kept that up for the next few minutes, ceteris paribus, there was a high possibility that he would break his neck.
Shino was so shocked that he didn't even eject his usual "…". Instead, his shades slipped down the bridge of his nose revealing slightly more than his eyebrows and his high collars flopped over like a dead flower.
The bag of chips, previously in a death grip in the boy's right hand, scattered around Chouji's sneaker-clad feet almost artistically, like the last of the cherry blossoms fluttering in the wind outside. The lump of half-masticated chips that followed swiftly was almost like, well to be explicit, it was akin to waste falling from a rhino's posterior and made Naruto grimace.
The only one who didn't seem as surprised as the others was Shikamaru. He stared at Naruto then ruffled the boy's head and went back to his seat, towing the other three back to theirs.
"It's already time for homeroom. We'll interrogate the kid later."
"NO!"
"Kiba, stop the Italian-accented 'no's, damn it!"
"NOOOO!"
"All right! You guys are officially the oldest in this school! Congratulations!" The form teacher, Umino Iruka, exclaimed excitedly as he began his usual 'term-ly' speech.
A hand shot up. "Umino-sensei, we're not the oldest; the teachers are."
"…Shino, good to see you again too. Moving on, you guys are the seniors amongst the rest of the student body so I expect all of you to behave and be a role model to the underclassmen, is that understood?"
A few heads nodded.
Satisfied with this, Umino-sensei moved on. "All right. With that, it's nice to see full attendance… wait a minute, where's Uchiha? Is he still not in school yet?"
Hands from half the class shot up; some were even waving frantically.
"Uchiha-sama is practicing in the fields for the coming Inter-High tournament!"
"Sasuke-kun is wonderful!"
"Sasuke-kun! Kyaaaa!"
Suddenly, the classroom door slid open with a loud 'bang' and a tall lean boy with slightly spiked raven hair entered the classroom. The commotion was replaced by a tension-filled silence, as the boy made his way to his seat, before a wave of noises in different pitches, mostly high though, let loose.
Thus begins the new term for the class of 3-7 in Ha-Ou Private High. (3)
"Yes, move over there a little more. Okay, good. Stay there."
"Next, give me a look of hunger and longing."
"Like this?"
"No, no… Hmm, pretend I'm the person you've been wanting to date for ages. Alright?"
"Okay."
"Right now, I'm all naked, waiting for you to pounce on me."
"Haha… okay. Like this?"
"Yes! Good, stay there."
An extremely handsome silver haired man posed as the photographer took a few more shots.
"Alright, we can rest now. Good work Nao-san." The photographer said as he handed a small towel to the model.
"Thank you, Hatake-sensei. It's an honor to be able to finally work with a renowned photographer like you."
"What are you saying, Nao-san? It should be the other way round; I never thought I'll be working with one of the top models in the region."
"Haha, thanks. But I really admired your works back then. It was partly because of you that I became a model, you know? Thought I might one day get to work with a professional like you. I didn't know you were this fun to work with, though; heard that Hatake-sensei was a very cool and a no-nonsense sort from many ladies."
"…You're talking about aged stuff, Nao-san. Well, I guess I tend to be a bit strict in the past but those were different occasions and projects. Besides, I've more or less quit photography. If Jiraiya jii-sama hasn't asked me to help, I probably won't be here." The taller man said as he rubbed the back of his neck and fiddled with his Leica. (4)
Nao-san looked at his colleague and frowned a little. "So it's true. I thought you were only on a hiatus. Why did you quit? You were so awesome. You were starting to gain fame in the other countries too…"
"Maa… for various reasons, I guess. But right now, I just want to concentrate on art and teach the subject, before I retire from all these entirely."
"Eh?" Nao-san dropped his towel. "You're gonna stop completely? But why?"
Kakashi only smiled.
"So spill!" Kiba yelled, as soon as the five of them reached the deserted rooftop.
They had skipped physical education class as the four (two actually since Shino didn't really care after getting over the initial shock and Shikamaru just thought the whole thing was troublesome) could wait no longer and Naruto had been too spooked (by the killer beams and killing aura) to attend his favorite class in peace.
"Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Of course I'll spill. But first, sit Kiba." Naruto smugly ordered as he leaned against the railing.
"Okay." Kiba smiled and obediently followed the command only to realize the implication and screamed, "Oi! I'm sitting because I want to sit not 'cause you told me to sit! Stop treating me like a dog."
Naruto snorted. "Of course I'll treat you like a dog. You want me to treat you like a cat? Fine. Here kitty, kitty. Want to play with this PET bottle?"
"You little…"
Shikamaru bopped the two bickering boys on their heads and scowled. "Enough. Naruto, stop baiting him; Kiba, stop getting baited. Tell us what's going on now."
The blue-eyed blonde's 'dead-fish' look returned and with a deep sigh, he launched into his story.
"Well, it all started with ero-jii getting sick. Then this perverted, suspicious guy called Hatake Kakashi appeared out of thin air and…"
Within 5 minutes of the story, the four boys have heard of how perverted, uncreative, scary, annoying, immoral, noisy, humorless the man called Hatake Kakashi is. Needless to say, by the end of the story (which Naruto ended with a "And now, I'm stuck with that immoral, useless, cheating, cheap-skate of a man for the rest of my life—! I've no more future! Ueeee—"), they were convinced that they have to somehow get their best friend out of this sticky situation; they would not allow a monster to touch the baby of the group!
Somewhere in a studio, a man carefully put down his precious camera before stepping a few steps away, hands cupping his (covered) nose and mouth. Then…
"Achoo!"
"Are you alright, Hatake-sensei?"
"Uh, yeah. I'm ok… …I think. Could you excuse me a little? Need to change my mask."
"Hm, sure."
Uchiha Sasuke has a secret.
He wasn't as asexual as everyone thought he was. In fact, he has only one orientation. It was Naruto-sexual. Ever since the incident in first year, where he accidentally kissed the blonde when he was eating his curry flavored ramen, he had been stuck in the web of love. Thinking back, it was almost like what his distant, distant cousin told him about fate and destiny.
:Flashback:
"Today, we have a new transfer student. His name is Uchiha Sasuke. Uchiha-kun, would you like to do a self-introduction?" Umino-sensei happily chirped as he gently guide the brooding brunette to the front of the class.
"…Uchiha desu. Yoroshiku." (5)
The cold, clipped tone of the transfer student was so chilling; it seemed as if someone had buried the classroom with ice cubes, ice shavings and snow.
It was a completely different feeling for the girls in the class though. To them, spring is here.
Sasuke mentally smirked as he looked at the faces of those people he would have the displeasure of calling classmates when his obsidian eyes caught a pair of sparkling baby blue eyes, that were rapidly darkening at the attitude of the new student. Taking that as a challenge, he stared back at the boy. Even when Umino-sensei called his name and assigned him a seat, which happened to be right at the back, at the opposite corner from his challenger, he refused to back down from the staring contest. Just when he felt his eyes start to water, the blue-eyed blonde squeezed his eyes shut and stuck out his tongue at him before ignoring him for the rest of the morning.
'I won.' The Uchiha mentally smirked again when a ball of crumpled paper hit his head. On the off-white paper, an incredibly ugly handwriting and poor spelling wrote, Bleah! I bet u thot u won! But I was juz givin u a handicap, u bastard. If u want a real challenge, meet me at the field after skool. — Uzumaki-sama.
After school, Sasuke had to give his infamous Level 2 glare before the girls scurried away. Two in particular, though, were pretty stubborn; he had to actually open his mouth to ask them to leave before they budged. What were their names again…? Something about a flower and a boar, these two would be troublesome for him in future. On a side note, Sasuke, who never had a talent in prediction, was surprisingly accurate; it was later proved, in the remaining of his first and second years, that those two were indeed trouble with a 'T' as they later put many professional stalkers to shame.
The blonde yelled the moment he showed his face at the field. "So you think you're so great! Let's have a ramen-eating contest!"
Sasuke blinked. "What? Excuse me, are you trying to bully me?"
"Ra-men-eat-ing-con-test! Dummy! And what the hell! I'm no bully, you idiot! It's a challenge! If you lose, you better have a better attitude in class!" The blonde smirked and folded his hands superiorly.
The taller boy rolled his eyes and began to make his way home. "This is a waste of my time."
"Hah! I understand your fear since you are facing I, the great Uzumaki-sama…"
"Bring it on, usuratonkachi."
"Teme, you're asking for it! Let's go to Ichiraku to settle this!"
The Uchiha blinked in apprehension. This was an incredible amount of ramen. And half of it were the spicy ones, which he hated.
'Why is there no tomato ramen? More than that, why the hell am I here? I must be stupid to play along with this idiot.' The brunette thought despairingly as he turned to look at his bully. The blonde's eyes were sparkling and there were sparkles and glitter all around him. 'Sigh. Guess I'll just get this over and done with.'
"Ready? Start!" Ichiraku's owner yelled as he brought down a flag (made by Naruto with an eco-friendly concept by using a chopstick and a paper napkin) and the two faced off.
Sasuke had never eaten so much ramen in his entire life. In fact, this would probably be the last time he ate ramen if he ever got through this challenge alive.
"All right! I'm gonna win by a bowl" His bully cried as he grabbed the last ramen — the curry-flavored one.
"Not so fast!" Sasuke yelled as he made the grab as well.
Then in slow motion, the blonde cried in horror as his hand missed the bowl by a few millimeters as Sasuke gripped it tightly and carried it to his side. Within the blink of an eye, Sasuke picked up his chopsticks, held the bundle of ramen firmly and slurped it all up before Naruto could do anything.
Frustrated, the blonde lurched at the brunette, only to slip from the spilled curry and land strategically on the brunette's face.
Milliseconds turned into seconds. Jaws (belonging to spectators) slowly dropped. Then, the mother-of-all-screams made its debut from the blonde's mouth before he dashed off with a significantly louder footstep; a 'thud-thud-thud' from the excess baggage (of ramen).
The boy, left behind by his bully, merely raised his fingers and touched his lips for a few moments. Then the effects from eating too much ramen at one time finally kicked in and he stumbled from his seat and made his way home with a pale face and sweat-soaked shirt.
The next day, both Uchiha Sasuke and Uzumaki Naruto never came to school.
:End Flashback:
Since then, his thoughts — and sometimes, dreams — have been plagued by the sometimes idiotic and always childish blonde. The frequency of his thoughts had since doubled when the blonde ignored/avoided him after the 'incident', and triple-folded whenever he saw the blonde blushed.
'This cannot go on.' The Uchiha thought as he washed his hands in the bathroom. 'I've waited for two years. I can't wait any longer. This is already our last year together. I must make my move soon!'
"So… what are we gonna do about that beast?"
"Well, we can't let him touch Naruto, that's for sure."
'Hm? Those voices? Aren't they Naruto's gang?' Sasuke thought as he darted into one of the stalls like a ninja.
"But what can we do? It's not like we can stop the marriage. Can we?"
"Maybe we can. Right, Shikamaru?"
Obsidian eyes widen. 'MARRIAGE, they say!'
"Maa… I'll think of something later. But firstly, I think we should see for ourselves what Hatake Kakashi really is like before we make any plans. His name is vaguely familiar, though…"
"Naruto tends to exaggerate, after all. Hatake… I've seen that name before too. But can't really remember where I saw it."
"Well, if we can't do anything, I'll just send Akamaru to bite that guy's balls! Hahaha…"
"KIBA!" Three voices admonished as their voices slowly faded as the group made their way out of the bathroom.
Sasuke slowly made his way out of the bathroom stall. The words 'beast', 'Naruto', 'marriage' and 'Hatake Kakashi' were swirling around in his mind and he slowly made the link. "Naruto is going to marry a beast called Hatake Kakashi?! Not if I can help it!!" The raven haired boy snarled as he clenched his fist and slammed it against the door of the stall.
For the third time that day, the misunderstood scarecrow sneezed.
'Sigh. Maybe it's those new masks I wore yesterday? Reminder: must wash them again. With extra detergent and maybe, Dettol.'
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fiction piece, meant for entertainment only. But one day, this would be the real plot for the manga once I buy over Naruto from Kishimoto-sensei.
Warning(s): AU (because I totally don't know what's going on in Naruto anymore XD). Long title, long flashback, major OCC-ness, bad language, OC, pathetic attempts at humor and shounen-ai.
Notes:
(1) 'Fufufufu' – evil laughter, or a cackle
(2) I read somewhere that miso was traditionally made in urns and buried underground so that the soy paste can ferment better
(3) 'Ha-Ou' – the 'Ha' means leaf and 'Ou' means king. So you get…
(4) Leica is a rather popular brand of cameras produced by a German company with the same name, and was the prototype for many camera companies like the early Canon models, Kardon, Reid, etc.
(5) It is the standard introductory speech you make when you first meet someone. However, in the case of Sasuke, it was a bit too concise and impolite.
A/N:
I'm really sorry for taking so long to update. But I was suffering (still am, actually) from my post wisdom-tooth-extraction-surgery (WTES). It's bad, really bad. :cries:
I had loads of fun writing the interaction between Naruto and his peers, especially Kiba! He's a very fun character to write. Shino, on the other hand, is a bit tough. Maybe that's why there aren't too many fics on him? Not sure if you had fun reading it but, I hope you did, anyway. :smiles: By the way, could you guess who Sasuke's distant, distant cousin is and who his two stalkers are? XD
As usual, R & R are welcome. You know you want to!