Ouran High School Host Club Potter Puppet Pals

by luckygirl88

This a series of one shots based on Potter Puppet Pals with the Ouran characters and styles placed in it. It's very funny and I do hope you enjoy.

4. Hosting Swears

Ouran High School Host Club Potter Puppet Pals

Presents

"Hosting Swears"

Author: Well, I was going to wait on this one, but since you guys want to read it badly, I decided to post up "Hosting Swears" aka "Wizard Swears". The problem isn't typing it out, it's coming up with funny swear words that the cast may or may not say. So, I shall try my best and like always, feel free to comment or rate.

DISCLAIMER: THIS CHAPTER IS RATED T+ FOR TAMAKI'S IDIOIC-NESS AND USE OF NAUGHTY HOSTING SWEARS LIKE HOMO SEXUAL BASTARDS.

*Kaoru and Haruhi are bouncing up and down while Tamaki runs in*

Tamaki: "You guys. Kyoya senpai posted up a list ridiculous naughty swear words that are banned from the host club. I didn't know us beautiful host had swear words,"

Haruhi: "Of coarse we do senpai. There called "Hosting Swears,"

Kaoru: "Yeah like Haruhi's debt,"

Tamaki: "Really? That quite lovely,"

*Haruhi gives a death glare and speaks again*

Haruhi: "Oh no. There much worse than that. Read some senpai,"

*Tamaki looks at the list*

Tamaki: "Hmm, lets see. Son of a MA!!!! That's useful,"

Haruhi: "Fancy Tuna. That's my favorite,"

*Kyoya steps in and clears his throat*

Kyoya: "Do hear our beloved host club cursing up a storm?"

Haruhi: "Oh no senpai…"

Tamaki: "Nekozawa's butt crack!"

Kyoya: "EXCUSE ME!?"

Haruhi: "Tamaki!"

Kyoya: "I refuse to this dreadful foul language said in my presence Master Tamaki. Five hundred thousand yen goes directly to Haruhi debt,"

*Haruhi gives a death glare to Tamaki*

Kaoru: "Tamaki's drool,"

*Every one just stares at Kaoru*

Tamaki: "Every one run. HOMO SEXUAL BASTARD!!!!!"

*Haruhi, Kaoru and Tamaki run off*

Kyoya: *sighs* "Moron,"

Scene Two

*Haruhi, Tamaki and Kaoru come in laughing*

Tamaki: "That was quite fun. Oh, hi Mori,"

Mori: "Hey guys. What's up?"

Kaoru: "Oh nothing. Were just saying naughty words like Jiggle My Instant Coffee,"

Mori: "Oh no. Mitsukuni forbids me saying such words,"

Tamaki: "Well Hunny senpai is a wanna be sissy boy!"

*Mori has a shocked expression on his face*

Haruhi: "He doesn't mean it Mori-senpai. He is just testing out some hosting swears,"

Tamaki: "I mean every word I say ever cause I'm Tamaki Suoh. The host club's king,"

*Dramatic lighting plays in background and shocks Hikaru who is not in this chapter*

Mori: "I'm telling Kyoya senpai about this,"

Kaoru: "You're such a sissy boy Mori,"

Mori: "This is against the big book of hosting rules,"

Tamaki: "I'm afraid I can't let you do this Mori senpai,"

Mori: "Oh no no. I don't want to swear. Mitsukuni wouldn't want me to swear…"

Tamaki: "Are you a member of the host club or not Mori-senpai. If that is even your real name,"

Mori: "I am a member of the host club…but…but…"

Tamaki: "Try then. Here's the list. Say anything,"

*passes list to Mori-senpai*

*Mori struggles*

Haruhi: "You can do it senpai!"

Mori: "Tamaki's penis…"

*Haruhi and Kaoru look at Mori with disgusted expressions*

Tamaki: "You sicken me!"

Mori: "But..but it's on the list,"

Tamaki: "I'm ten times the man you'll ever be Mori!"

*Mori creeps down*

Tamaki: "Leave the Ouran Host Club Takeshi Morinozuka and never come back!"

*Mori walks out depressed*

*Haruhi and Kaoru yell out "Yaaayyyyy!!!!!"*

Haruhi: "You have quite the princely charm today Tamaki senpai,"

Kaoru: "Yeah. Your right with your idiotic attitude,"

*Tamaki gives the death glare and tries to beat up Kaoru, but fails*

Tamaki: "Well, now that's done, let's make a prank phone call,"

*Tamaki takes cell phone out of pocket and begins to dial*

*Nekozawa picks up*

Nekozawa: "Black Magic Master Nekozawa speaking,"

Tamaki: "BELZENEF THE CURSE DOLL!!!"

Nekozawa: "WHAT!? You kids. If you EVER make fun of Belzenef again I will put a curse on you for all of eternity! You yeah! Stop calling me!"

*As he talked, Haruhi, Tamaki and Kaoru started to laugh and Kyoya and Hunny walked into the scene*

Kyoya: "There they are,"

Hunny: "Kyoya-chan told me he word like to have a word with you guys,"

Haruhi: "Son of a yaoi,"

Kyoya: "That is the exact language I want to remove from the host club. Our traditions as well as our currency must be high. If we let this…"

Tamaki: "MOTHER FUCKING *BEEP BEEP* HIKARU'S SHIT KYOYA!!!"

Kyoya: "WHAT!!!!?????"

Tamaki: "You stealing cheap skate you!"

*Every one just stares at him*

Kaoru: "Haruhi's bikini,"

Kyoya: "Hunny senpai I argue you to beat them up with your Karate immediately!"

Hunny: "Oh Kyoya-chan let them have there adventure,"

Kyoya: "I thought you were the one who wanted to ban the words in the first place?"

Hunny: "I barely remember what happened a few minutes ago. Back to whatever you do best,"

*Kyoya leaves and mumbles to himself*

Haruhi: "Thank you so much Hunny senpai,"

Hunny: "You're welcome Haru-chan,"

Tamaki: "Hunny senpai, you're really short right?"

*Hunny looks down in shame*

Hunny: "Yes. Why?"

Tamaki: "Do you know any dwarf, super short, shrimp, yet sissy old hosting swears?"

Hunny: "Well, I do know one Tama-chan, but you must never ever repeat it,"

Haruhi: "We won't senpai,"

Hunny: "Well… here it is…"

*Hunny takes in a big breath*

Hunny: "YOUR MOTHER IS A *BEEP BEEP BEEP* ING *BEEP BEEP BEEP* REALLY OLD *BEEP BEEP BEEP* YO MAMMA JOKE GONE WRONG *BEEP BEEP BEEP* BANNA PEEL *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* MONKEY *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* COMMUNIST *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* VIC MIGNOGNA *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* WITH A PILE OF *BEEP BEEP BEEP* IN A ANOTHER ROOM WHERE NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* V-8 *BEEP BEEEP BEEEP* WITH A PLAT OF *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* TRAVIS WILLINGHAM *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* WITH A NUCLAR MISSSIEL *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* CURSE DOLL *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* HOMOSEXUAL BASTARDS!"

*Hunny begins to breathe heavily*

Kaoru: "Woooowwwww!!!!"

Hunny: "Now you know. You must NEVER EVER repeat ok?"

*Hunny stares at all of them*

Tamaki: "We promise Hunny senpai,"

*Later that day…..*

*Haruhi, Kaoru and Tamaki say the awful curse words in front of Mori and he begins to try and escape them*

All: "YOUR MOTHER IS A *BEEP BEEP BEEP* ING *BEEP BEEP BEEP* REALLY OLD *BEEP BEEP BEEP* YO MAMMA JOKE GONE WRONG *BEEP BEEP BEEP* BANNA PEEL *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* MONKEY *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* COMMUNIST *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* VIC MIGNOGNA *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* WITH A PILE OF *BEEP BEEP BEEP* IN A ANOTHER ROOM WHERE NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* V-8 *BEEP BEEEP BEEEP* WITH A PLAT OF *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* TRAVIS WILLINGHAM *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* WITH A NUCLAR MISSSIEL *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* CURSE DOLL *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEP* HOMOSEXUAL BASTARDS!"

The End

Tamaki: "This is just a quick message from your host club king saying that no one was hurt in the making of this one-shot, except Hikaru and Mori. I'm afraid Hikaru went from gay for his brother to a tyranny and we will sure miss him…"

Hikaru: "I DID NOT!"

Tamaki: "Gotta go,"

*Tamaki runs off set*