Chapter 3
She walked to their apartment in a daze. She only saw straight ahead, her peripheral vision had shut down. Sounds were quieter, her feet hitting the floor had less impact. She needed Liara now. To lay in bed and wrap their arms around another. She wasn't there. She paced around their cabin. She was still wired. She knew she was supposed to be tired but she wasn't. She called Liara on her Omni-Tool.
"Cass, what is it? What's wrong?" Liara answered. How did she know she was in distress?
"I... need to talk. Where are you?"
"I'm in the biotic café on the 24th floor with Aethyta. Do you want us to come to the apartment?"
"No. I'll meet you there."
She rushed over to them when she saw them in the café. To call it a café was an embellishment. It had been one of the Ascension's smaller mess halls, converted into an upscale café by one of the galaxy's most ubiquitous chains in the wake of the Council making the Ascension its temporary home. The Ascension was for the moment not truly combat ready, most of the military personnel had been reassigned, some weapon berths removed to make room to accommodate the extra consular staff. They were halfway through a galactic victory tour. In a few weeks when they'd move back to the rebuilding Citadel, the Ascension would revert to its original function. She and Liara squeezed hands as Cassandra sat down next to her.
"You look like shit, Shep." Aethyta said with customary grace and tact.
"Thanks, dad." Cassandra shot back, making no effort to hide the sarcasm. Aethyta chuckled.
"It didn't go well, did it?" Liara asked.
"No, it went pretty much as I expected." Cassandra sighed. A waiter came but she waved her away. The last thing Cassandra needed was caffeine.
"He didn't listen to a word you had to say, did he?" Aethyta asked. Cassandra shook her head.
"One thing I've learned is that it's hard to change people's minds once it's made up." Aethyta said. "That guy's built his identity on being the one who got shafted by you. He blames you for all his misfortunes. He still thinks you're that cold-blooded bastard from Torfan. For him to accept you as you are, he'd have to change his entire identity, his outlook on life, everything. It's easier to hang onto old grudges and outdated beliefs than to move on. Let me tell you, the most stubborn human is a pansy compared to an old krogan or asari. Trust me, I'm one of them. You think Tevos will ever warm up to you? Don't bet on it. She and some other matriarchs have treated me like shit since I proved them wrong with the Reapers. Before they laughed at my blue ass. Now they want my blue ass to shut up. You think spying on you and Liara is some kind of reward for my prescience and centuries of loyal service? Ha!"
"So, what are you going to do?" Liara asked.
"I don't know. If anything he'd make a better Spectre than Mueller. He's resourceful and determined. Picking Mueller would give me fewer headaches when the Council gets to whittling down the Spectre candidates. If I go against him, he'll just think he was right about me. But if I vouch for him, support him, maybe he'll see he was wrong about me."
"Fat chance." Aethyta said.
"I have to do this." Cassandra said quietly.
"Why? Cass, you don't need to prove yourself to anyone anymore." Liara insisted, squeezing Cassandra's hands for extra emphasis.
"I know... it's different this time. If it was someone who didn't know me it wouldn't matter. But he saw me at my worst. When he tried to bring to light the truth he got shafted for it..."
"Don't waste your time." Aethyta said. "Especially, don't take this the wrong way, but I think you're doing this for yourself more than for him. What you did back on Torfan is massively fucked up, there's no denying it. But I know why you did it and why you felt that way back then. I think most people would, too. I also know you've changed, really, really changed since then. No one's perfect. You want to make up for what you did back then. You know what? I think you have with everything you've done since then. You've saved the galaxy for fuck's sake! And if people like this Aetherton and a handful of batarians can't deal with it, that's their problem, not yours."
Cassandra sat back, absorbing Aethyta's words. There was an uncomfortable ring of truth to her words. Just as how she'd apologized to Tevos those long months ago. But she couldn't cast him adrift. Liara looked at her with those glowing, bewitching blue eyes of hers. They were pleading with her to see reason. But also, was a bit of understanding.
"Your problem, Shep." Aethyta continued. "Is you still feel guilty over what you did. You need to let go. You have a lot to live for. Don't ruin it by wallowing in your past. I've got a list a mile long of terrible things I've done but I don't dwell on them."
Cassandra shook her head. "I can't help but think of Mordin. He felt guilty about the modified genophage. In the end, he did something about it. And now, they're building a statue of him on Tuchanka."
"Cass!" Liara interjected, her face a map of worry and dread. "You can't possibly..."
"No!" Cassandra said firmly. Her green eyes looked straight into hers, calming Liara, assuaging her fears. "I'd never do anything like that. We have so much together. I'd never do anything to jeopardize that."
"Then drop this." Aethyta said firmly. "There's other ways you can help him. Talk to your Admiral Hackett, tell the brass to stop getting on his ass so much. You making him a Spectre isn't going to change his opinion of you. Nothing is."
"I'll think about it." Cassandra said. She looked at Liara. Her mind was already made up. Nothing Liara or Aethyta could say would change it. She could see Liara's was saddened by this. Cassandra felt a sharp, brief pain inside her soul. She had to do this. If this she showed Atherton, she'd feel better about herself and her life, and thus her family's life, would be happier as a result.
"He is a curious choice, given his history." Valern said. The other councillors sat around their conference table. Each had one aide with them, Cassandra had Stravowsky sitting next to her. Datapads were strewn around the table. They were reviewing Spectre candidates. Currently they were looking at Atherton's candidature. For a Spectre to be approved, there had to be unanimity among them. One turian candidate had already been dismissed.
"I'm forced to agree with my colleague." Sparatus said. "He has a long history of insubordinate behaviour. If he's this disrespectful of your own stature, there's no reason to believe he'll show this Council any greater deference. His participation in that scandalous vid is another checkmark. Spectre's embody the authority of the Council. We cannot have a Spectre openly disdainful of one of its members. I find it puzzling that he was even considered, much less put on a shortlist. Even more puzzling why you'd even consider promoting his candidacy. There is only one human Spectre as of now, and we all know this was a purely political appointment made by Udina to prepare for his ill-fated coup attempt. At the risk of overstepping my bounds, humanity deserves better and can do better . Your other human is a much stronger candidate. If you insist on bringing his name forward, I will not support it."
"Nor will I." Valern added.
"I will." Tevos said suddenly. The other Councilors looked at her, a shocked look on their faces. None was more surprised than Cassandra herself. Stravowsky tapped Cassandra's hand. Cassandra turned to look at her, Stravowsky lightly shook her head, a worried look on her face. Cassandra nodded subtly, why would Tevos suddenly come out of the blue to support her?
"Why?" Valern asked, making no effort to hide his bafflement.
"I think his service record is exemplary, evidence of adaptability, determination, skill. He does embody much of what Spectres are meant to represent. Perhaps he can grow into the role." Tevos explained, though it seemed she was reaching for something just out of her grasp.
"Much but not enough." Sparatus said firmly.
"We've witnessed you make stronger arguments for weaker causes." Valern added.
"It is obvious there is no consensus on this issue, nor is there the possibility for one. Are we agreed?" Sparatus asked the other Councillors. They all assented, some more reluctantly than others.
"Therefore, under the rules of procedure, Lieutenant Jonathan Atherton's candidacy is hereby rejected. Let us move onto the next item on the agenda. Security meeting from Major Kirrahee."
Thus ended Atherton's candidacy as a Spectre, a discussion that had barely lasted half an hour. Cassandra had no time to reflect on this setback. The lights dimmed and the QEC device was activated. The salarian captain's image appeared before them.
"Greetings Councillors. Nice to see you again, Shepard."
"Likewise, Major." Shepard said, wearing a big smile.
"Can you give us your findings on your mission in the Kite's Nest system?" Valern asked.
"Yes, I can confirm the batarians are in the throes of a civil war. We're able to ascertain there are two main factions with various sundry weaker factions aligning with one side or another. One faction is led by Balak who requires little introduction. He controls a significant portion of what remains of the Hegemony's military forces. He's also bolstered by support by the Blue Suns. The recent assassination of the Blue Suns' leadership by parties as yet unknown set off a power struggle. The Blue Suns are now under batarian leadership and the Blue Suns have since purged their ranks of any humans. Balak is espousing a blatantly anti-human agenda, one of his most popular supporters is a mad preacher who until recently made his home on Omega. This has enabled him to capture a large portion of the batarian religious castes. He wants to unify what's left of the Hegemony and target humans in the Terminus systems and beyond. He's diverted significant resources into building another orbital mirror system. He's also made statements of extraditing Councillor Shepard to stand trial for various crimes against batarians."
The other Councillors scoffed openly at the suggestion. Cassandra stirred nervously.
"The second main faction is led by Governor Grothan Pazness. He's the most radical. He wants batarians to unite under his banner to rebuild their culture and society, to do away with slavery and their caste system, to be more open to the galaxy as a whole. Despite his radical message, he's attracted the larger number of followers, mostly from the larger, lower-caste batarian populace who are traumatized and tired, eager for new ways. His radical message also alienates him from more powerful and conservative members of the Hegemony. His military forces are negligible at best. Although their outlook would be the most agreeable to the Council, these forces stand the lowest likelihood of emerging victorious."
"Do you have further information regarding the orbital mirror?" Valern asked.
"Not as of yet, Councillor. We know only that it is in construction somewhere. It is a highly guarded secret, few outside Balak's immediate circle are aware of its existence. We will continue to search for leads."
"What's the strategic situation?" Cassandra asked.
"Balak's forces hold three planets outright. Prazness' forces hold two planetary bodies .The bulk of the fighting is taking place on the homeworld of Khar'shan, with many of the largest cities descending into war. We've seen many incidences of urban warfare, improvised weapons, sieges and so forth."
"What about refugees?" Tevos asked.
"A surprisingly low number of refugees, under 10 thousand. This is due to several factors; the devastation caused by the Reapers severely culled the batarian population and the remaining batarians seemed to be strengthened by a common bond forged during the Reaper War. Few are willing to abandon their homes so soon after the Reapers came. Most are willing to fight for their cause, though not without fatalism. Some, especially in Balak's faction, speak of dying off in one final blaze of glory."
"What about derelict Reaper tech?" Cassandra asked.
"Our forces destroyed whatever derelict Reaper ships we came across. We found both factions are trying to use Reaper tech to give themselves an advantage in this war. We know Balak's forces are attempting to recreate the Reapers' beam weapon. So far none have succeeded. "
"The Geth were reactivated by a rogue quarian admiral. Could the same be done with the Reapers?" Sparatus asked.
"Unlikely. The Geth were machines, purely synthetic. The Reapers are bio-mechanical. Their complexity is unfathomable even to the most advanced species." The salarian major answered.
"Do you have an estimate as to the remaining numbers of batarians?" Valern asked.
"I would give an estimate at perhaps 20 million. The bulk of whom survived by virtue of being outside their home system when the Reapers arrived."
The Councillors looked amongst themselves and shook their heads. The hegemony had once claimed Khar'shan was home to 15 billion people. While there was no doubt exaggeration was behind this claim, there was equally no doubting the planet was once host to several billions of lives.
"Thank you, Major." Cassandra said. "Continue with your mission and keep holding the line."
She detected the slightest of nods from the STG officer. "So long as there is a line to hold, it will be held. Thank you. Councillors, Shepard." His image disappeared from the QEC and the lighting returned to normal. Cassandra rubbed her eyes and sighed. They'd been here for four hours and the agenda was nearly finished. Short by Council standards but she was tired, she hadn't slept the night before, nightmares and insomnia gnawed at her legs like a rabid pitbull. Nightmares of Torfan had awakened her the night before.
"This batarian civil war merits our attention." Sparatus began. "Civil wars often spread beyond their borders, engulfing neighboring states and systems."
"Agreed." Valern said. "We should allocate more reconnaissance resources to their sector. Boost defences in neighboring sectors."
"I'm worried about Balak's faction gaining the upper hand." Cassandra said. "I know what he's capable of." She thought back of their encounter on Terra Nova. It had been agonizingly difficult for her to choose to let him go. The sneer on his face as he ran away and she ran to diffuse the bombs still filled her with rage. That moment, though ,had proved how she'd changed. The younger Cassandra would've ignored the hostages and fought the batarians. She remembered with great pride Anderson's face as he read her report of that incident.
"I agree." Valern began. "Were Pazness' faction to win this civil war, it would present the Council with a grand opportunity for a new era in galactic politics, and give us one less threat to worry about. Perhaps the first step in establishing Council presence in the Terminus systems."
Sparatus looked at Valern. "It is too early to begin implementing such moves. We are too fragmented and compromised. In a few decades' time perhaps. We haven't discussed expansion into the Terminus systems in any meaningful detail."
"In a few decades this civil war may be resolved in favour of Balak's forces and the opportunity before us will no longer exist." Valern argued.
"Intervening in a civil war is fraught with peril, it can give rise to thousands of unforeseen consequences." Tevos said. "It is best that we remain on the sidelines observing. When a clear victor has emerged, we can deal with them appropriately. We are still very vulnerable ourselves. If we aid the losing side, the victor will regard the Council with even greater enmity and distrust. If we're seen to have intervened it may negatively affect our public image. Especially if we plan to carry through on our eventual plan to expand into the Terminus systems."
"What do you propose?" Cassandra asked Valern.
"Further reconnaissance and bolstering of our defences bordering batarian space. Further, we should plan a covert outreach mission to Prazness' forces." Valern answered.
"What would this outreach entail?" Tevos asked sharply. "He will be suspicious and I am leery of offering anything beyond moral support."
"I am not proposing any tangible aid. Merely to ascertain his intentions and his disposition towards the Council." Valern said.
"That's a good idea." Cassandra said.
"However, if we have nothing tangible to offer him he will be disinterested, displeased, even." Saparatus said.
"Balak has the Blue Suns. Maybe we can use some of the credits we've confiscated from various criminals and warlords to purchase the services of other mercenaries, Eclipse or Blood Pack even." Cassandra suggested.
"That does have a certain appeal." Valern began. "The use of intermediaries would be necessary to decrease the chances of this being traced to the Council."
"Yes, I would support this so long as the intermediaries cannot be traced to us." Sparatus said. All eyes turned to Councillor Tevos. She looked at the table before her, deep in thought. Cassandra wondered why Tevos had supported Atherton's candidacy. She had no doubt her motive was anything but malign. But what was her true motivation? What was she planning?
"I recommend caution but I see the need for a favorable outcome to this conflict. Very well, let us proceed. This should be assigned to one of our Spectres." She said finally. They finished their meeting by agreeing which Spectre to use, a Turian with years of experience in the Terminus system. They moved onto the last item of their agenda which were various ancillary minutiae regarding the next leg on the Ascension's Victory tour Rannoch, which would also include a ceremony marking the quarians' readmission into the Council. The ceremony was slated to be modest, though the quarian celebration would be less so. The modesty of the ceremony was symbolic message, the same given to the krogan; past crimes are forgiven, but not forgotten.
"What do you think Tevos was planning with supporting Atherton?" Cassandra asked Stravowsky. They were in her office, sipping coffee. Both were leaning back, resting their feet on her table. It had been a long meeting, and it was only mid-afternoon.
"I don't know." Stravowsky admitted. "I don't have an antenna for all this intrigue and backstabbing. I'm still surprised that every morning I come in here I have to search for bugs and spyware. Give me policy proposals, trade legislation, that I can deal with. The only thing I can tell you is its bad news."
"Was she like this towards you?"
"No," Stravowsky shook her head, "She was cold but still respectful. Actually, wasn't your wife an information broker?"
Cassandra nodded.
"Maybe she still has some old contacts. Maybe they can find out."
"If she's planning something, I have to prepare for it. Keep an eye on Atherton, maybe she'll try to use him against me somehow."
Stravowsky pointed her finger at Cassandra's face, then pointed it to her own nose. Cassandra touched her nose and was surprised to find it marked by blood. She cursed and fumbled for a tissue. She titled her head forward and pinched her nose. After a few minutes the bleeding subsided.
"You okay, Shepard?" Stravowsky asked.
"Thanks doc, I'm fine. It's weird. I haven't gotten space nose in years."
"Happens to everyone," Stravowsky said. "The air's so dry in these ships it's a miracle it doesn't happen more often. It's been a long day, why don't you call it a day?"
"Thanks doc, I'm going to head home now."
Stravowsky raised her eyebrow and smiled. "I hope you're not going to make a habit of going home early."
"Yeah, I was thinking about finally going on a honeymoon. Six months sound fair? Sure you can cover for me while I'm away?" Cassandra teased.
"Only 6 months? You're so considerate." They chuckled.
"See you tomorrow morning, doc."
Cassandra found Liara in their cabin. She was sitting in her hover chair, learning a new piece on the piano. She looked frazzled and frustrated, slamming her fists on the keys. Cassandra dropped the bag she was carrying, knelt next to her and they kissed another passionately, Cassandra gently stroking Liara's scalp. She was so glad to see her. Seeing her after a long day's work made most of the stress evaporate.
"What's wrong, love?" Cassandra asked.
"This piece I'm trying to learn it's so... difficult. It's not the notes, it's the timing! I've slowed the piece down but I still can't get it right!"
"What are you trying to learn?"
"It's Blue Rondo a la Turk by Dave Brubeck."
Cassandra smiled warmly. "Yeah, I heard those weird time signatures can be hard."
"That doesn't begin to describe it!" Liara exclaimed, still shaking her hands in frustration. "It feels so unnatural, so counter intuitive! It's like walking with three legs!"
"I got something for you." Cassandra said, eager to brighten her wife's mood.
"Do you now?" Liara smiled eagerly.
Cassandra reached for the bag. Reaching in she pulled out a contraption that resembled a small fishing net, roughly two feet wide and three feet in length, with small spherical devices that resembled suction cups.
"What is it?" Liara asked.
"It's from Sirta Foundation. It's a Element Zero Chiropractic Massage Pad."
"Sounds interesting." Liara smiled.
"What you do," Cassandra stood up and walked behind Liara with the tool in hand. "Is you put it in the lining of your hover chair. It uses eezo to generate small mass effect fields that automatically detect points of tension in your spine and then massage them. It's like having a portable masseuse."
She slid the contraption into place. It activated as soon as it was connected to the chair's power supply. The chair began to glow and hum. Liara closed her eyes, a blissful expression appeared on her face, the tension vanished.
"This is so, very nice." Liara purred. "This is even better than the massages you give me."
"I hope you're not thinking of replacing me." Cassandra teased, she hovered behind Liara. She rubbed her shoulders and dropped her head down, looking at Liara upside down. She kissed Liara's forehead.
"If you keep buying me things, I just might love those more than you." Liara teased back.
"Maybe I should return these then, get a refund. I've spent a lot of money on you, missy. Maybe I should stop spoiling you." Cassandra smiled.
Liara laughed softly, almost musically. Cassandra knelt beside her and the two kissed another passionately. Liara cradled Cassandra's face in her hands, biotic flames flared from both of them. Cassandra rested her head on Liara's chest. She pressed her ear against Liara's stomach, listening to the sounds of two heartbeats. Liara stroked Cassandra's soft, black hair.
"I love you." Liara said quietly.
"I love you, too." Cassandra replied.
"What's on your mind?" Liara asked. She could read her like no one else.
"Are you still in touch in Feron?"
"Yes. He sent me some intel just a few days ago." Liara answered.
"They rejected Atherton. It's not surprising, I guess. But Tevos said she'd support his candidacy. I want to know why. I think she may be planning to do something. Maybe she wants to use him against me, somehow."
"I'll ask Feron to look into it. What are you going to do about Atherton?"
"I still want to do something for him. I just don't know what to do."
"You know what I think about this, but I hope you'll think of something soon."
"Yeah, me too."